No-Body, No-One, No-Thing, in No-Time - AlexSQ Journal

Greetings, friends.

This will be a journal that does NOT cover any specific subs, because I generally switch them a lot over the year (for many reasons, see below) except for one that always stays: EOG4.

I mentioned briefly in this post:

what is going on.

Currently on a healing retreat (Rebirth Regen, EOG) I will introduce RoS in about 2 weeks-ish. (quick washout in between).

And maybe RM as well after a short revelation time with RoS. I wanna see where it leads me.

The general tone (looking at the title of the thread) of my development is coming back in tune with my infinite consciousness, WHILE living a healthy life in this matrix.
Which of course, includes money, romance, etc.
I don’t care much about status, although due to my planned escape via my brand, I somewhat am in “need” of a certain level of fame to escape the 9-5 slavery.

After that is done, the slavery of the mind will be escaped in more detail.

So far I had an INSANE run with subs, lots of journals and crazy stuff.
I mean, I own almost all of them, and a bunch a customs :smiley:

That journey revealed A LOT of things to me. Especially recent ROM gave me deep insights into how my mind works and I realized I DO have a strong flow factor. Not @Invictus levels, but I absorb the scripts FAST.
This is why I (personally) am pretty fine with switching subs on a 3-month-ish basis because it is generally driven by an internal push (subconscious mind) to do so.

And I only ever do it after a washout. If the urge sticks, I switch.

I discovered that every time I did that, I breached through certain pleateaus.

DISCLAIMER: This is NOT an excuse for you guys switching subs all the time when you’re in recon. I’ve been there, I learned to discern the difference.

But I also discovered another thing, especially since ZP:
It DOES NOT, in the slightest, matter which sub I run, I will always end up in the same realm: spirituality, soul searching, No-Thing Mindset.

Basically, I am just discovering more of my Self. The Soul.
Which is what I adore deeply about ZP.
I get external results, recently been running Wanted, sex of course, was insane. But the thoughts always end up on how irrelevant it is, while enjoying it.

The nature of being born with a lot of Gemini placements.
The back and forth.
Here and there.
Nowhere.

I am starting to truly appreciate and love this part of my being.

Planned stack for now:
EOG4
RoS
Wanted

As I said, Wanted might be replaced with RM or anything else, depending on what Solo RoS with a short introductory will reveal to me.

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To make things a bit more practical.

I think I have about 30-ish runs of EOG1 and 20-ish of EOG4 under my belt.

The biggest thing it does to me is this:
Neutrality.

At first, I was in deep recon to NOT care about money at all. But I came across material (Maritime Law of Money is a rabbit hole you can go down if you want) that helped me understand this.
At the same time, it keeps me productive, without ruining my day.

I didn’t become a mad 24/7 hustler like this society teaches us (look up “hustler” in the dictionary, you might be surprised), I do my business, I enjoy it, but I am not forced or pushed to make it super quick. I am building a strong foundation which will yield freedom in the future.
That’s the long-term scripting of EOG, for sure.

So it’s a combination of understanding the TRUE nature of what money is, don’t care about it, but enjoy working towards it.
This being a paradox in and of itself only confirms the validity for me, since most of life is a paradox.

Or to make a long story short: I moved from making money to having impact.

Adding value > selling stuff.

With EOG, it can be tough to see results initially. You REALLY need to look deeper and see what it is telling you about yourself, your relationship with money, etc. This escaped me initially, but now I can see how it has been moving MOUNTAINS of subconscious beliefs and structure already.

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For sex.

Initially I get the insane trailer effect as always (even if I ran the sub before, although it’s been many months).

Meaning, my girl dressing up in lingerie, relaxed, joyful sex, connecting and good control over the climax.
Plus, outside of that, everyone wants to connect with you. I notice a lot of people staring at me.

But then, after you actually dig deeper, it urges you to have tough talks, deep conversations about issues from the past with my girl, that made her sexually repressed etc. Solving that and moving into NEW, better territories.

All while, again:
Neutrality.

Not caring about it, while enjoying it.
Making your needs and wants clear, without DEMANDING it.

The subtleties in these subs are glorious.
RoM helped a LOT to see these little details.

And well, the masculinity scripting in Wanted also fired hard, making sure you lead your girl properly to a future, both of you can enjoy.
There truly was a lot of tough talk in recent times in my relationship, but it helped me a lot to let go of bad emotions, revealing the underlying love in new light again.

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Revelation of Spirit 3min (2 days ago) report:

  • Woke up the other day with a headache, was a bit annoyed. Then a thought popped up in my mind: “YOU are not having a headache. Your body is experiencing this temporary discomfort. It’s not a big deal.”
    I managed to pull myself out of that mentally, good mood surfaced, got out of bed easily and the headache vanished.
    It seems like I am much more able to control the energies within me
  • Laid Back over 9000. Everything is easy. Nothing matters (at a grand scale) but I still enjoy doing it. Like, this “unphazedness” is a new level to me. I am not a nihilistic idiot now, I just accept life as is, while still following my goals. SUPER GREAT feeling.
  • I smile a lot more
  • I enjoy the scenery much more. Randomly looking out the car while sitting in a traffic jam and enjoying the trees and birds
  • I enjoy my wife a lot more. Her body, her being, her very self.
  • Much less judgment, while still having realizations about people. For example, I noticed how FAR away I am from my closest family in understanding the fabrics of reality. They’re still believing in MSM and the government and all that (except my wife) and I noticed how I feel bad for them.
    Not from an elevated position of superiority (you know, the spiritual ego), but from a position of “I was there myself, in the past. I wish for you guys to get to the knowledge I have.”
    And I am not even trying to convert them or even talk about the “conspiracy stuff” I know about. I just nod and smile, and move on.
    Very liberating.
  • I absolutely don’t care about the general publics BS. People tell me about some newest TikTok Trend or what the gov is pulling and I’m like “IDGAF.” Not saying it of course. I am polite but I cannot relate AT ALL lol

Last one can be tough for many (then again, this is my journey, maybe it makes YOU very social), but it withdraws me a lot from people I cannot relate to. I am not mad or angry, I simply, plainly, don’t care about their BS.
Maybe there is some healing necessary for this.
I definitely need to stack it with a social title, Renaissance Man keeps calling again (although RoS/Wanted sounds interesting also).
Next sub tomorrow will be EOG4/ASC and then I’ll like give RM a shot. My old friend.
If anything, individuality and self expression was ALWAYS a big thing for me, so I should give in to that.

Other musings:

  • Revelation today that I am absolutely NOT into minute details. I always was the 80% guy. My mind is quick and fleeting, I like new topics left and right. I HATE going into detail.
    I realized how I have been misusing my Youtube business, trying to cut out pauses, cool transitions, and all that clutter.
    It’s not me. Not my spirit (get it?)
    From now on, I will go back to how I started. Raw talk, not looking to get under 10min videos. Deep, broad, topics I discovered and want to talk about.
    Big revelation. Gave me a smile when I noticed it.
  • Sex-wise I changed a lot also (without having had it yet with RoS), but when before I wanted to have this and that met and get this and that done. Now I seem to be more focused on just enjoying her and us and the moment. I can already see how powerful this will be with a sexual title (eagerly waiting for Divine Diamond stacked with RoS!!!)
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The Soul is aching today.

RoS is working through something deep. And the recon comes in as impatience. The recon I likely dislike the most.

Two things I am currently thinking of it works through:

  1. Sex

Due to many years of porn I still have a completely wrong picture of it in my mind. Or so I think. It’s still not enough coming from the heart (bro do I need Divine Diamond :smiley: )
Currently no libido at all, it seems like it’s completely breaking down my sexual beliefs to bring them up anew.

Revelation of Spirit could honestly also be called Revelation of the Heart.
Imo, it’s the same thing.

  1. The Breath of the Ages

Time is cyclical. We know this.
It’s that bible verse @SaintSovereign mentioned which states that everything has been done before. There is nothing new to learn. We already did everything.

I mean, why is it called RE-Search?
WHY is it called re-search?

This leaves a HUGE void in my mind and current daily interactions. I am very withdrawn and pondering internally A LOT about this. Trying to reconcile. If this is the case (by all means, it could be wrong, who says we understand time right? The Bible could also be wrong), but if it is, then what is the point of doing research?

It is the breath of the ages, inhale, exhale. Sine waves. Back and Forth. As Above, So Below. The Pendulum Swing of time.
Makes a lot of sense.
But how to deal with this on a daily basis?

RoS is asking the tough questions, and this leaves one with the question of how to operate in this physical world (matrix), with everything being meaningless, but still deriving meaning from it?

This needs some more meditation, for sure.

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One thing the RoS / EOG / RM Combo has done so far is coming closer to my true spirit business wise.

Meaning, focused on creativity in teaching and slow growth.
I installed the extension again that hides all “views, subs, likes” etc on Youtube and went over my own videos with that, removing everything that is just designed to gain views, and kept everything that is designed to add value.

Plus, I redid ALL my thumbnails to use a more creative approach:

This is clearly RM at work.
But not just that.
FOR THE FIRST TIME, I actually had fun designing thumbnails.
Before I was trying to meet the “general successful thumbnail guidelines” which are all annoying af.
Now, it is fun. I enjoy it. Creative work, etc.

I might grow slower this way, but I ENJOY it.
Which is the ultimate goal of any purpose, is it not?

RM has been a blessing.
Although I went through some tough recon initially (I guess the combination with RoS also makes it stronger, TRUE, RELENTLESS expression of spirit) now I have re-gained that zest for life, my craft, and all things.

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It’s also fascinatic to read older posts of mine on here and not even being able to comprehend who that person was or how he was thinking.

A sign of progress.

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Just used that image above to find your YouTube channel and watch one of your videos.

You are an excellent communicator! It’s great.

Happy for you. I think you have talent. It’s easy to listen to you talk. Will be fun to watch you unfold.

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I hope this isn’t against forum rules :confused:

But thanks! Glad you like it!

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Good point. I’ll delete the post if necessary (and send it to you personally :slight_smile: ).