Your Cup Owerfloweth - An AlexSQ Journal

Alright, I’ve been silent af in here because RoM kinda keeps me inward and journal offline.

Still, I have things to report.

The combination of RoM with EOG4 and Wanted is profound. This stack was brought to me BY RoM itself.
Currently I am undergoing a DEEP and COMPLETE reset of my sexual beliefs, mindset, and how I perceive myself and my need for sex.
In more concrete terms: Currently I feel like there is ABSOLUTELY no need for sex. Initially I felt weird about this thought popping up, but then I realized (or revealed) that I am letting go of the ego driven version of sex.

This ego, this part of me is currently dying.
I imagined first that I would get the anger/rage recon from something like this, but nope, it is the “nothing is happening” recon that annoys the f out of me.
Like, you don’t notice CRAZY results, when I consciously remind myself, there are results, but it’s not that obvious. It FEELS like the stack doesn’t do anything.

But this IS recon. The most dangerous one, because it quickly makes you switch stacks.
NOT SO THIS TIME.

This is the beauty of RoM, because it reveals so beautifully to yourself how your mind operates, what recon you are currently facing and what’s happening in your mind.

TMI happening:
Tonight’s dream definitely consistend of the Wanted male enhancement. Which is weird because my wife is already chokin on it and I don’t really have a “need” for this part, but in my dream my member was so HUGE it was impossible to get it in anywhere. Like bucket size which is comically stupid but maybe that’s the lesson, that more size doesn’t do anything for me :wink:
Either way, it felt nice to touch it in my dream :smiley:

EoG
I have been streamlining my business like a madman.

  • Removing videos that don’t align with my direction
  • Started my podcast
  • Created a 10,000 word free newsletter magnet
  • Redid the entire website to funnel all to the newsletter
  • Redid my purpose course from the ground up with a template for product creation I found from an old coaching

Basically, RoM EOG4 not just revealed to me WHAT I need to do with my life, but also HOW and WHERE.
This whole process of streamlining the business is definitely a long-term thing I can tell because I first and foremost set up the initial onboarding which is mostly free products or affordable ones (pro tip, never call your products cheap, call them affordable :wink: ) which, of course, doesn’t create much revenue.
But the subs clearly told me in my mind, “Keep doing this now, it’s the setup for massive income later”
Which kept me pushing through, without much compensation.

Super powerful.

I also notice the self actualization in RoM and EoG2 a lot, been on a listening trip of Leo Gura’s videos (actualized.org) which helps a lot to consciously work with the things I realize subconsciously. So I am on the path.

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Oh on another note, RoM also reveals to me how the mind of the world works.

Non-Duality, you all know this.

And I came across a website by the good Scott Jeffrey, also known as CEOsage (basically, high vibe advice for entrepreneurs) and he made a website I will NOT link in here because it could be misconstrued (about vaccines, conspiracy, mental health) basically how our current society of mental illness came to be over 100 years.

The shadow of the world, so to speak.

And it revealed A LOT to me about my own mind, how humans operate, how we can be controlled, etc.

So, RoM works on ALL REALMS and I am loving it.

The funny thing nobody mentioned so far is that it told me to expose myself MORE to subs.
Before I was running a sub, then 3-4 days rest.
Now I am on the recommendation (almost) with
2 subs day 1
2 days rest
1 sub
1 day rest
Repeat

So except for the 2 days rest after 2 subs I am exposing myself A LOT more to these dense subs, but it works like a charm. Idk why, but maybe the connection between my conscious and subconscious is stronger and/or RoM just helps me to work with recon better.
I have no feelings of overexposure…

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It’s been 20 days already? wow

So many things changed so quickly, I don’t even know where to start.

I recently started my healing retreat I learned from @Malkuth with Regen/Rebirth and this made me come across this great video:

Which made me realize MANY neurosis I have within me but also helps me to further reconcile the peace of mind and ACCEPTANCE of the self now while still trying to improve.
Because it is seemingly contradictive.

But it isn’t.

Acceptance is the first part. Without accepting your flaws and issues, you don’t even know what to work on.
But even then, you might realize, that all these flaws and neurosis might not be your true self.
They might be things given to you by a fkd up society.

So in a sense, growing yourself (not your bank account, or your wet dick, but your Self) IS acceptance.
Getting closer to who you are is self improvement.

It’s just that too many gurus out there sell you to become a certain being.
But not yourself.

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Oh yeah, sexual and masculine healing from RoM/Wanted has been insanely deep (pun intended).

Huge changes on all realms.

It seems that I just ignore the external James Bond, multiple girlfriends scripting, and just apply Wanted in a marital context, by solving my issues, accepting flaws, and diving deep into humanity.

Plus, of course, sexual power.
Basically by healing bs.

Interesting.

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Did you ever catch yourself self-sabotaging?

I did this for the longest time.

Business(es) failing is not so much an external issue of not knowing how business works.
Its more an internal problem.

And I catch myself WHILE doing it but I can’t stop.

Anyone else had that feeling?

When you know I should NOT change the business around YET again, but you can’t stop.

This is why I committed to this healing retreat now.

The stack showed me the limits of my current reality, and literally told me I need to heal things first before proceeding.

Plus, LOTS of gratitude I am getting from Regen, and the feeling that I already live as a new being from Rebirth.
I do seem to have a much better flow factor ever since running RoM.

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Regen/Rebirth at work.

I was with my family at my mothers’ yesterday and her interacting with my son, it suddenly was BLINDINGLY obvious how she influenced my life and why I became the Nice Guy in the past.

  • Not allowed to make mistakes
  • No sign of love, only control
  • Constant scolding and control to do exactly as she pleases

THis is where I created the need for love and female validation that became a need for sex later in life.
It’s so obvious now lol

Now I am not mad at her, she probably got the same treatment growing up, we just give our traumas to our children, unless healed.

Which is why I am glad I found subs and the healing journey to at least remove a big chunk in favor of my children.

There is too much revelation in my mind to even write it down, but it explained SO MANY things I (still) do and did to myself, to my relationship(s), etc.

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One thing I am still dealing with is to not skip steps.

Like, I KNOW I should focus on money issues and solving other relationship issues, as well as issues within myself first.
Yet, I find myself looking into metaphysics, “conspiracy” theories, and higher realms.

I don’t know how to keep myself focused on the immediate things before me.
It’s so MUNDANE.
I just don’t care about making money. I wanna create impact.

Which is not to say that those are mutually exclusive. In fact, I’d say you ONLY make money (in big numbers) if you create impact.
But the tedious stuff involved in this (like taxes, learning sales, copywriting, etc) is so annoying.

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If you go to the North, you sacrifice the South.

If you go to the East, you sacrifice the West.

Every direction you choose involves sacrificing something.

Every parent, no matter how great, is only able to connect you to part of what you need. Fulfilling the rest is one’s own responsibility.

In adulthood, we can create opportunities to address those capacities that were sacrificed in our youths.

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It’s a lot easier to get lost in metaphysical and higher realm stuff. I find the open ended nature of it gives a lot of freedom for interpretation. But it’s not always practical unless it ties in with where you’re currently at in your own personal reality. To me it can sort of be like another form of escapism, like getting lost in a movie or something. It’s still fantasy if it doesn’t come back to the here and now.

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A person who’s ready to be lost is going to get lost; whether they look at a cloud or look at a bank statement.

So many people are lost in very ‘practical’ jobs. It’s not exclusive to spirituality.

I’d see spirituality as art-turned-within; and art as spirituality-turned-without.

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True. I guess the difference I’m trying to illustrate is that most people won’t try to ascertain divine wisdom from a cloud. Or maybe they would, not sure.

Unless there’s access to undistorted sources of information on this stuff, it’s easy to start thinking you’re on to something. When really it’s like that game of telephone where a message passed down gradually loses the original meaning. I find it really hard to trust easily accessible forms of information on metaphysics and spirituality.

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I think the original is just as distorted as the copies.

To me, cosmic wisdom involves walking to the edge of That Which Is Known and, despite the fear of being there, sitting down and having a look; having a feel.

What you experience will, by definition, be beyond words. That’s actually the whole point: To experience that which is beyond words.

As you return from the edge of the known, and travel back within the cloistered interior of The Known, you will have been changed by the journey. Others may ask you what happened, and as you struggle to translate your non-experience/experience into words, some people will get very excited, and will wish to believe that your words somehow can substitute for the experience/non-experience. (Spoiler alert: they can’t.)

Then some people will argue with other people about what your non-words really were saying about your non-experience. If they keep it up long enough, congrats, we’ve got another religion.

But the real crux of the matter is in taking that journey to the Edge of the Known, living to tell the tale, and returning to be among people again afterwards.

Add to this the fundamental moral and ethical doctrine: Be Thou Not An Asshole; and you’ve pretty much got a spiritual path.

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I can make this much easier.

The realization you gain from spirituality, conspiracy, or ANY higher realms that money is fucking pointless.

I don’t hate it, but it has no use other than buying us things on this plane that have no use either.
We could live just fine by growing our own food on our garden.

However, I DO realize that we don’t LIVE in such a world. We live in one where it is NECESSARY and even GREAT to make a lot of money because it buys certain freedoms (note, I didn’t say it buys FREEDOM itself :wink: )

And this is where it gets tough for my soul to work through the irrelevant, basic details of it :smiley:

Or it’s just recon from EOG4 :smiley: :smiley:

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Alex I just wanted to thank you. I can’t send a PM right now, I wanted to write here if you don’t mind. thank you, I saw this place through your site. I don’t have the money to buy a sub right now(except for the free ones :slight_smile: ), but thank you for helping me get here.

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Glad to see I could bring you to this place! Welcome!

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This journal will be closed, and I’ll start a new one.

Why?

Well, as you can tell by the initial “SAL VATION” custom title for CFW, it was heavily influenced by religious means, specifically Christianity. Which I don’t consider myself but due to material I became more believing in Jesus again.
Only NOW to come across material that kicks it all to the curb SO HARD, I’ve been on a cleansing spree of my whole life lol

I am not aiming to attack anyone’s faith, you do you. This is my personal journey.

I was raised strictly catholic (cathodic), but I now realize after getting back into it a little bit that this is usually how my progress goes.
I get deeper into a topic, before I hit a vantage point of realizing how all of it does NOT fit me in any sense.
I underwent a similar realization with money, and also currently with sex itself, as well as magick, which I learned was more satanic that I thought lol

I know this is all very cryptic, but again, it helps my personal catharsis.

Plus, since the initial stack is not correct anymore, and this will keep happening since I developed a healthy habit with switching subs (more of that in the new journal) I will just name with nothing special in mind.

See you there

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Here’s the new journal:

Do you want this thread closed?

Yes, forgot to mention. Thanks!