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@Inevitable
Thanks for the compliment
It’s been two times since you complement me and I hope people don’t think that we are both the same person.
Two Khans won’t collide, Khans mostly thrive on people’s insecurities, starks mostly thrive on people’s neediness.
No coquette can seduce a Khan, cuz all subclub subs have that.
Anyways, concepts are getting a bit mixed up here. If they don’t get provoked by each other’s words and tones they will be fine, cuz they are inherently faur people, another thing they thrive on is their discipline and courage.
Another thing is the perfect Khan will try to dominate physically but in a fun(maybe just superficial fun) like getting touchy and try to do that.
Basically a Khan will do any justified thing to dominate another.
Edit:on slightly unbalanced titles such as EB:TOG it’s hard to judge.
@Nemesis
Anyway, I see.
So if two Khans would meet, they would rather collaborate than fight each other like the peasants would? Is this what you think?
Can you expand upon this? What do you mean?
Too much status to give a fuck about anyone seducing us.
@Prioritas
I want to say sth more
Sometimes people can have bad effect on you even in you adulthood, I heard from a fairly expert guy that traumas can also be created in adulhood.
About my sister, when I was running HOM, I was so inclusive woth my family and sister.
And all of a sudden she started poking me, that you cannot focus on anything, you are lazy and I think that hit deep. At first she tried to convince me that I must change my path but when I resisted(I did not say anything bad) and tried to convince her, she started saying some pretty harsh stuff.
My father(I think I did not forgive him completely because another wave of hatred/sadness came out when I just thought of him now) was always about us studying, mostly taking best grades so that he cpuld brag. And my sister is someone who does it. So he’s giving credit to her.
Amd after some hardh thing she said about my weed addiction and stuff, and also my inconsistency. Then I put her on ignore in Facebook messenger. After that we had alot of beef. And I pretty kicked her ass. I hated her from my childhood I guess. I don’t care about she being my enemy, but I don’t want to hate her subconsciously.
@aaa
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I understand this somewhat brother
I also had a lot of expectations placed on me from my parents, lots of “this is what you should be” type of comments.
I also had family members look down on me for a weed addiction, say I was lazy, laugh when I told them I was going to quit.
It hurts, even in adulthood.
I don’t have advice tbh, since I’m still struggling with this too.
But the first step is definitely awareness, and now that we are aware of the wounds we have, we can work on healing them.
I had a thought the other day that pain is a blessing, because it shows us where we are weak and wounded in our souls, and gives us the chance to heal that place inside us and fortify it so its strong. Once we heal and fortify and forgive and let go, we can’t be hurt again in the same spot.
Let’s do it together bro 
so they can’t hurt us anymore
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There’s a saying that goes something like this:
What happend to you as a child is not your fault. But as an adult it is your responsibility to heal and recover from that childhood trauma.
Not everyone has reached that point in their journey where they start taking responsibility for their own lives and what happens in it. Most people live in a traumatized daze where blame is put on what goes on outside, a kind of learned helplessness, victim mentality.
But that’s okay, we are all on our individual journeys and it’s not my job to fix someone else, but it’s my job to take care of my own s**t. We experience our world as we are, and the way we are becomes our perception of life. Ultimaltely IMO if I cannot forgive other people (for myself), regardless of who it is, and let go of what another person has done to me, I can never fully move on. A high level of self-care is to learn how to truly and deeply let go… but on the other hand, it can be among the hardest thing to do…
Just my two cents 
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Thanks
Very nicely said.
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This si about the past
I was talking to someone in pv and I. Posting some parts of my messgae hereI had a fight with my father and I slept in park in cold weather and everything. So yeah. Shit has been tough.
It is what it is.
Mehn I have been through some serious shit now that I remember.
I dunno, struggling but ery calm at the same time.
Now that I am thinking, I am in recon RN.
Although I forgave my father with an intense crying on EB. But I guess now that I remember that how I was contained with him 20 years of my life. And how much possibilities I missed and now all of a sudden I am exposed to the world gives me pain. It was not supposed to be like this.
It’s not than anger towards him anymore, but more of a pain or being kind of weak. Maybe there is another healing going on, but I am in pain. In pain of weakness and not being productive. It is recon and for sure I know that after the recon good things will happen. I am kind of frustrated, living at my friend’s, although he is good with me. But there is always a certain about of authority over me.
And damn that hits hard.
I am just planning to go abroad to study and nothing else. I put a cross over women for now. Just wanna get things going
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Are you back in a warmer place to sleep now?
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Yeah the story is from 2 months ago I guess.
I manage better for now
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Another shadow aspect(I dunno if I should call it shadow aspect) of mine which I discovered is the fact that I always want to find a structured approach to situations.
For example: when I was studying english grammar just now, I realized that I am looking for structures to learn. What do I mean?
Present tense is used for repeating action and general fact.
Present progressive is used for actions which happen around the time when we speak.
For example: 1-I am going to school right now, 2-I am working hard these days.
For the second example: what I catched my mind doing was that it wanted to connect it to that “repeated action” characteristic of simple present tense.
Although in this example that might be true, but I found that this “want to find structure” approach sometimes sent me to rabbit holes which I came without any good results out them.
This can be from my fear of memorization, or me being lazy which would result in searching for easy ways. It’s like I wanna go deep into the topic. Like when memorizing vocab or even just studying it, I tend to read ablut the origins of the word.
OR OR OR
This tendency to find definite structure for the “HOW” 's of certain subject can a strength for me which I can use it in structured subjects such as mathematics.
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I am getting a very strong urge to run primal seduction.
But I don’t have empty space on my stack
Except the RICH crypto
Anyways, I am going to sleep on it tonight.
I think I like women a lot.
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