So rushing straight to ST4 might not give the best outcome if you still need deep healing & preparation.
The best approach is to stick to one stage until you overcome the recon & reach the desirable outcome.
I wasn’t supposed to go to a meditation center to get a woman totally obsessed with me and then drive me home and make out with me (and more) in the back of her car for four hours, but…. Oops
Some things are very clear now that I’ve integrated Khan, had a 12 day washout, and integrating the lessons from my first few weeks being single.
THE TL:DR - #1 decision about sex
I don’t want to run RoTNW, or WB, I want to run Divine Diamond, that is my ultimate expression of what I want sexually at the moment. Anything less than a divine-diamond-type sexual encounter is settling right now.
The Full Lessons
Getting sex is easy.But being fully sexually satisfied as a way of life is difficult. It requires connection, trust, communication, adventure, integrity, authenticity, audacity, and so much more. Sex is NOT sexual satisfaction. And sexual satisfaction is NOT always sex. I have some relationships that are platonic that provide me more of a “hit” of feminine energy (which is very satisfying to my masculine) than my sexual relationships.
Getting sex is easy.Getting sex while managing and maintaining a 100% relationship to your authentic self, maximal integrity, and unbreakable standards is of middling-difficulty. (Possible, but requires vigilance.)
Getting sex is easy.Getting women to submit to your masculine frame and give to you 110% of their feminine energy is difficult, without shutting down or making themselves smaller, is more difficult. (As the Zan Perrion quote goes, I don’t want your consent, I want your joyful co-participation.)
Getting sex is easy.Therefore, I’ll be going celibate, saved only in cases where the woman and I have an INTENSELY strong connection, and have talked about sex in detail before having it, and have talked about what our commitment/relationship will be after having it… and of course, this all needs to be done while maintaining my authenticy, integrity, and standards.
Getting sex is easy.Therefore, the more masculine pursuit is chasing drive and passion.
Getting sex is easy.Therefore, I won’t be running RoTNW or Wanted Black. If I want a sex title, I’ll only be running Divine Diamond, because, sex is easy, sexual satisfaction (physically, emotionally, spiritually) is harder.
This has been a pattern I’ve noticed MANY times. Anytime I have a 7+ day washout, I end up with total clarity on what direction I want to go in in life.
I guess the “competing voices” in my mind all unify and create an overarching vision.
Well… they were very happy dreams. They featured my fiancée but only the best parts of her - no ill will or negativity charged with her in the dream.
Felt happier than normal on wake, and didn’t have the “20 more minutes” feeling that I normally do. Was much easier to jump out of bed, shower, and meditate.
thanks to Khan and meditation, i’ve made more progress than I ever have in my life in understanding and the link between my trauma of getting cheated on in high school and my later sexual anxieties.
boo hoo woe is me
I was dating a girl for about a year who would cheat on me, and then if I wanted to break up with her, would slash her wrists (cut herself) and threaten to kill herself. So I was stuck in the relationship. Then I was afraid of getting cheated on more, so I turned to “fucking her like a pornstar” in the hopes that I could have sex with her well enough to make her forget about other guys.
There’s a lot of trauma that resulted. If I ever performed less than “total pornstar quality” my whole body would flood with shame and sensations of dying - “she’s going to cheat on me now”…
I’ve been trying to understand the connection between my patterns and my past for 15 years, totally failed, and now I’m starting to understand, and not just understand, but WORK WITH IT.
Khan is amazing.
@WinglissStark thank you for your post - inspired me to reflect even more deeply.
Looking to add in Love Bomb later if needed - starting wth AoH at the moment.
NWE will modify paragon sleep to be more oriented towards becoming a morning person
IC/Job Seeker will help me find a new sales gig
Chosen/Job Seeker will help me succeed at the office politics
Chosen will help me on the sales calls
**Socially/Romantically:**
Results towards women have been god damn incredible. Women LOVE me. And I love women. But with every woman I date, woo, encounter, etc, I realize the only part of the interaction that I value right now is the friendship. When I turn it into romance or physical intimacy I regret it. So, my whole goal is finding women that I deeply connect with and keeping it 100% platonic. (Will revisit this in a few months or when it feels right.)
This is different than celibacy. I thought I was celibate. I’m not. I’m just not interested in serious dating and I’m not interested in casual dating. I do have a friend I’d sleep with rn, her and I are talking about it - she’s in an open relationship.
You Are Not Alone will help me cultivate female friendships with a spiritual bend (I’m really deep into meditation/buddhism right now, and I want some amazing female friends generally)
Chosen will desexualize the hypersexuality of Khan without reducing the sexual energy, it’ll just help me channel it better socially
Light Of Humility will temper the Khan ego
Light Of Humility + Achilles’ Heel address my biggest weaknesses generally, socially, in work, etc. I’m predicting more open socializing (especially with women manifested by YAN-Alone)
Fenrir adds edge to Chosen plus helps me temper (use appropriately) the edge of Fenrir. @Friday said it made him nicer 95% of the time but made his anger a force to be reckoned with, when needed
Chosen helps me embody the “positivity” of the meditation/buddhism crowd that I feel so connected to right now.
**Long Term Vision**
In the long term, I don’t want to stick in sales. I want to be in counseling, or coaching, or leadership. I love and am obsessed with the training and development of people’s wellbeing and proficiency at the soft skills.
Chosen is great for counseling, leadership, coaching, men’s work facilitation, general compassion in friendships - all the things that make up the totality of my life and goals are enhanced by chosen. Tack NWE on to take care of the rest
I think this is my best attempt at explaining this concept ever.
TL;DR - Don’t stack switch to a sub in the same category, ever.
If you’re running WB and then have the urge to run LoTS - DONT - that desire is just a product of the physical shifting RESULTS you’re getting from WB
If you’re running Khan and want to run a sexual attractant sub on it within the first few weeks - DONT - that is just the RESULT of you getting more sexual attraction and prioritizing it higher in life than you did a few weeks ago.
Why do you feel you cannot run Khan to achieve the results you are looking for in work?
You mentioned sub hoping
I think it’s the opposite, too,
people feel one sub will not be sufficient for a different area they now care about.
Like they can’t handle the other area on the current sub. Unless they are choosing a different sub as a tool for their immediate goals.
Subs can be a tool, and Khan may not be the best tool for specific areas, but it may support those areas overall more powerfully than any one tool.
To me, Khan can be a tool for state effect or dating; I’ve used it. Its real value is the ongoing growth that comes from running it extensively, I imagine.
I have been running 20 seconds of Khan Stage 2 a week alongside my other 3 subs and found it has enhanced things. I couldn’t go back to life fully without Khan lol