I sent in a support ticket last night since I felt desire to return to DR. Most likely, it was due to recon. I don’t feel confident using Stark primarily because of my direction and aim, which is to be more successful.
This creates discomfort since I have, and still am, pointing myself towards a healthier life. Stark isn’t anti-healthy. My heart just keeps going back to loving myself, respecting myself, and allowing myself to heal and feel what I need and want to.
I’m just drawn towards finding the inner peace I’ve been looking for for so long. I also realized I’ve been trying to hide this desire from myself since (I think) it’ll involve some pain and letting go. I’m seeing evidence of this in repetitious acts of not finishing things, both big and small.
I’ve just been afraid…of finishing this?? Yeah. Acceptance, letting go of family strings, all of it. It’s been my base, my identity, and I know no other.
I’m airing this, as it’s true for me. Is this normal? (what’s normal?)
This isn’t my journal. I’ve just lacked the courage to take this step. I equate it with a major loss.
l’m asking for help, yet am afraid of trusting others. A double-edged sword.