Gone through so many iterations of my next custom trying to encompass the concept in my head, but something is missing.
@AnswerGroup please can we get an ESSENCE: Fun module extracted from Primal added to the Q store😔
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My reality is mine. Not yours, not theirs, not his and not hers. MINE.
Opinions and beliefs are confronting each other, clamoring to be given permission to be my truth. But then……
A voice asserts its presence, uncompromising not willing to share. If dominance was a voice, this would be it.
And the others, rendered insignificant have no choice but to disappear into the ether.
And the voice said to me
What it that you desire?
A flood of desires came rushing to the forefront of my consciousness, like a dam had just been let loose. Each of them vetted and approved. Yet no constructiveness and alignment within them.
I couldn’t give him an answer.
He went on
Energy must be expressed
Vision must become reality
Fire was meant to burn
Let me out and set your sights on our target
BUT I’M SCARED. Fire demands fuel and fire consumes.
Alas, I will never master my flames if I never immerse myself within it. To become my flame.
Perhaps, I’m still thinking about fire through narrowed perception.
Music is just beautiful.
Sitting down here, blissing out, but I can’t help but notice results😂
I went from just singing along → being able to vibe-> unconsciously being moved by music anytime anywhere → witnessing the true beauty of music.
Now, I still witness its beauty, but unlike before, I can open up myself to being immersed in it or I can remain solid.
All these within a span of two years, with no focused effort. Just a result of growing alignment.
Hmm, I’m beginning to feel heat present within my upper abdomen and chest area. And sometimes, there are moments where it radiates through my entire body.
It’s very close to the feeling I get when I’m in the gym.
I looked in the mirror and noticed my eyes are looking more “hunter like”
About two weeks ago I felt a perspective shift again, like I grew taller, and people around me commented on it, same as last year. Its like growing taller in summer is now my favorite pastime.
Couldn’t get to this
I’m just going to note results as I go, and then, compile them later when I have time.
Gems on understanding manifesting
Then this
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The next step in my journey has never been this clear, it’s been obvious for close a month.
I was waiting for an almost two week long recon to be processed, before I embarked on the next phase.
Got a breakthrough two days ago and finally resolved the recon yesterday.
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The recon had the four pillars which had to be resolved to bring more alignment
Internal emptiness
Better put as “perceived lack”. Because I haven’t experienced some things I strongly desire. It seems like there is a whole inside me, felt it viscerally. Together with the desire to keep filling this hole.
Vicious cycle. This is the literal foundation of how monsters are made. Knowingly or unknowingly.
Shadow
These desires expressing themselves through my shadow, wanting to fulfill those experiences by any means. To fill the internal hole plaguing me.
Suppression
Finally, me suppressing my shadow as much as I could, for as long as I can remember. This uses up a lot of internal resources. Also leads to unchecked and unharnessed growth of my shadow.
War
Light and dark keeps colliding…every day…every second…every moment I live and the light seems victorious, but how long…till the burnout?
Which leads to
- Fragmentation of self
- My unhealthy relationship with power. I know what power can do, I desire power. However, I am my internal model of power, I know my intentions aren’t the slightest bit pure, and I can predict my expression of power. Therefore, I avoid becoming powerful by any means.
- Constant war between desires, thoughts, emotions, and, therefore, actions.
Final takeaways
- What is a good person? Perhaps, I’m not a good person and that’s fine.
- Lack of alignment reflected in quite practical ways.
- Inability to fully be a force of nature as I’m not one full whole.
- Capitalizing on vulnerabilities. Hell, I’m not even trained but I can see vulnerabilities in others. Imagine what a trained person can do. Going even further, imagine encountering something that has vowed to put everything beneath their feet and you become a target. You lost before the fight even started
- The laws of compounding and “cause and effect” reflected in the inner world.
- Nothing is hidden.
It gets even crazier, but those are too personal. Some things are hard to accept, and, I’m not going to overhaul my entire life around my revelations, but I won’t deny them any longer.
The journey will continue regardless.
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Have I ever believed there was something impossible to achieve? No
How about for me? I think yes.
Not that it’s impossible, more that I don’t deserve it. “I am not worthy”.
Never spoken that, but live it everyday. In my thoughts, what I can receive, what I ask for, what I accept, what I’m willing to take. Even asking for help has been difficult at times.
Anyone, even I, could justify it by saying I haven’t put in the work to be worthy, which could be true. However, FUCK IT.
I want the world and I’m beginning to believe I am worthy. I simply need to shift the blocks and watch things fall in place.
I AM WORTHY AND NOTHING IS BEYOND MY REALITY
Not everything is for me, but I will have every experience my journey has to offer.
Alignment births harmony
Harmony births flow
Flow births coordination/rhythm
Coordination/rhythm transfers into power
Strategically, biomechanically, energetically, chemically. Reality is interconnected and meant to flow, and, the body isn’t an exception.
Quick Question
If alignment is the natural state of reality, won’t an aligned body naturally be beautiful and healthy?
More research required. Maybe I’m just talking out my ass.
Anyway, physical training has been reduced to minimum levels for the better part of the next 3-5 months, except when I absolutely can’t do without pushing something.
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Change in behavior currently seems slow, but it’s authentic. I’m not putting on a persona, a clothe, or a state. At any level I reach, that’s who I currently am.
Not worried about “regressing” back to baseline or having to put on an act.
The journey continues.
Another one
Lessons of the day
- Multifunctional Action
- A reminder that ignorance isn’t bliss
Form & Function
A functional body is a healthy body and a healthy body is naturally beautiful.
Form follows function.
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Regulation of big bodies take time. We can argue that it’s an efficiency issue, but that’s not the full picture.
To regulate such a big body, enough “proper” information and data is required, which can actually be quite expensive, and some only really observed in hindsight.
Regulatory bodies constantly have to play “catch-up”. Then, they struggle to regulate entities (some lager than entire international powers) that move for profit. Most times having to compromise after a shit ton of lobbying and bureaucracy.
Markets will adjust to new information and updates in regulation, which directly affects what people choose to consume. Hence, these entities will do anything to maximize their profits, because they know it’s a game of time — gain as much as possible, given the season. They will do anything to keep ignorance, misinformation, outrightly lying, even when their own internal information and research says otherwise.
And when they’re caught, they simply pay a small price for doing business. But the damage has been done to you, the consumer. And you’re left to fix your shit, or suffer the consequences.
I know you’re curious — why do they still do what they do, even when they might know the truth?
Well, the answer remains the same — Profit. The cheaper unhealthier option is usually more profitable, and, well there’s so much money to be made.
Now, I’m not saying the wealthy are evil or wealth is inherently evil. Simply understand
There are people motivated solely by profit, they don’t give a fuck about you, the world, the environment, nothing. They may provide value, but how valuable is this value, especially to your own interests.
Why do you give your money, your very essence to “value” that doesn’t serve you?
Secondly, stop being sold for the wrong reasons, and, do your own research
Adaptation in and of itself is alignment.
An alignment between the state of external situations and internal environment towards an outcome. An example is handling objections.
The external is the engagement with the other party involved and all the information/data provided, the internal is the goal/purpose you’re handling the objection to guide towards. And knowing how to guide the other party towards the outcome is the internal reflecting back into the external. Both environments shifting, till an outcome (balance) is achieved.
The Inner Voice
The result of the inner world (countless internal processes) distilled into audio format.
I like to think that there is one inner voice, which speaks from the depths of the subconscious, but as it comes to conscious awareness, it gets fragmented. The fragmented voices mirrors various beliefs, with each voice having differing qualities depending on the nature of belief.
The moments when multiple voices plead their case before me are becoming more apparent. Sometimes it’s civil and other times it can get…quite graphic to say the least 
Depending on the voice, it may have considerable influence in my internal world. However, I am still the master. I can choose to keep observing, influence quality of certain voices (volume, tonality etc) or even jump into the battle by consciously influencing my one voice (one of the perks of Khan).
Now, for the reasoning for my second paragraph. There are moments akin to silence in my inner world where my one voice is the observer, inquirer and the inquired. I use “akin to silence” because all other voices are silent, but in the process of my one voice interacting, some other voices are triggered, along with their originating belief and the emotions they spur.
Although it’s still tricky, those moments are moments of conscious guidance where I resolve reconciliation, outright decide what to keep and what to leave, what I want and how I want a sub to express for me.
Another one
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