Mary Edward Adam, but yes. No harder to use, but I don’t see why not use the same one that the military does.
I don’t know the LE one. I like the NATO one since none of the words rhyme. Even on sound-powered phones it’s easy to be understood. So any of the words in LE rhyme?
I had an asshole Apple customer once. Said crap like S for Song. T for Thing D for Ding. Every said A for Aing. Was being a dick since I’d asked for the serial number phonetically
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Now you’re making me think. I don’t think so.
Adam, boy, Charles, David, Edward, Frank, George, Henry, Ida, James, King, Lincoln, Mary, Nora, Ocean, Paul, Queen, Robert, Sam, Tom, Union, Victor, William, X-Ray, Young, Zebra.
Nope, no rhymes that I can see.
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- I had another long talk with the wife about subliminals this time.
She wants to upgrade her Paragon to ZP, so I’ll do that for her tomorrow, and she also wants to start Seductress directly rather than doing some time on AFW. I’ll get that set up for her as soon as it gets ZPized.
She seemed pretty enthusiastic about it actually, but she was somewhat concerned that it might cause her to outgrow me.
I told her that can happen when one partner starts growing fast and the other doesn’t, but that I’m doing the work myself so that’s nothing to worry about.
Seductress probably would have caused her outgrow the no confidence, neurotic guy I used to be. But the Chosen Emperor? Not Damn likely.
We talked about a number of other very productive things as well. Good day.
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you’re like “I got this,babe”
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**1/23/22 CYCLE 2 WEEK 2 STACK A**
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My wife will be starting Paragon ZP tonight. She’s been on Paragon Qv1 for quite a while and reported some improvements to her MS symptoms, but really not that much.
She was hesitant to switch to something more effective because it might make it so she didn’t get disability. Frankly, she is disabled and I will be even more impressed than I’m expecting to be if this puts her back into a condition where she’s able to hold a full time job.
I will be starting a separate journal to track her progress. I have her permission to do that, but she doesn’t want to do it herself.
We’ll add in Seductress as soon as it gets ZPized. -
I’ve had four days off. I had been working six days a week for I don’t remember how long, and I’d worked twelve hours for the last twenty six days straight so it was wonderful. I got quite a bit accomplished, but not all I was planning. I slept a lot. I was more exhausted from burning the candle at both ends than I even knew.
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- I started the Paragon journal for my wife here.
Paragon ZP vs. MS: My wife’s story
I am feeling quite hopeful about her use of Paragon ZP plus her now having a better treatment team. The last doctor she had was just phoning it in at best.
- Diamond really kicked in when I went back to sleep for my night shift. I don’t know if it was just that or results from using the Bathmate for a week, but it made sleeping a bit difficult. There was a real difference. Unfortunately, it’s, you know, the time I’m not getting any from the wife.
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Booooo. Hate that time. I tell mine it doesn’t bother me. She’s the one with the issue about it haha
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- I showed the wife the first entry in the Paragon journal, and she went ahead and read this one.
I heard about everything she didn’t like and disagreed with.
She wasn’t angry, at least not aggressive, but there were tears.
Truth be told, I can understand her not being happy about some of the things I said, but it turned out well.
I told her that I say things on here, not just about her, but more importantly about myself that I’d never say to anyone who actually knew who I was. Not even a therapist. The anonymity here allows me to speak freely even though it is a public forum.
We discussed it and she said that she understands that what she saw wasn’t meant for her eyes and gave me her word that she wouldn’t read my journals anymore. I have never known her to break her word, so I can still journal freely here.
I really felt that a boundary had been violated here, but I took care of it. Good progress there.
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- Holy Crap! What is Diamond doing to me? I have not been this horny since I was like, eighteen.
It’s not just that though. My sexual filter has been turned all the way off.
I used to have trouble discussing sex, especially with her. I don’t know why, I just did.
That went off like a light switch.
I just had a very NSFW text conversation with the wife. While I was at work.
I’ve always known that I LIKE being dominant. Very dominant, but I had kind of a mental block against actually letting that loose.
I told her exactly what I want her to do tomorrow and she enthusiastically agreed to it. I even told her about a fantasy of mine that we are going to be acting out, in detail, and not only did she not balk at it, she enthusiastically agreed.
I told her that tomorrow morning, I’m going to give her instructions on how exactly I like certain things done. I wouldn’t have done that, hell, last week. Once again, enthusiastic agreement.
I was feeling a sexual energy that I never have before during the whole thing.
This sucker is amazing.
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Nice 
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I can’t wait to see what Primal Seduction does for me.
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-
I think that the wife and I have had sex more in the past month than in the previous year.
It’s better and more exciting too.
I just plain find her hotter than I have since the beginning.
She is being more sexual than I’ve ever seen her and I’m having a lot of fun with it.
She’s been acting a lot more feminine, a lot more eager to please, and not only going along with what I ask her
That was even before Diamond. -
I learned something from that guy who hit on her. I need to be unafraid to actually make my intent known to a woman, nothing bad is going to happen, and if I read a woman right, showing interest is going to put her over the edge. It doesn’t work on tens and the like, but I’ve never needed that anyway. As long as I feel some attraction, I’ve always had a better time with with what most guys would call nines and tens. They’re more eager to please and a hell of a lot less entitled and annoying.
-
While we wait for Seductress, we have added Libertine to her stack.
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- Wolfie’s Wisdom for today. If you have any plans, don’t run Diamond while lying next to your partner while she is running Libertine. You will not get there on time.
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**1/30/22 CYCLE 2 WEEK 3 STACK A**
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The thing with my wife and that guy looks like it’s not going to happen. He just kinda weirded out. She was feeling kind of down about it and was going into a “what’s wrong with me” type of place.
I know it well. I talked a bit about changing the story you tell yourself like I learned on DR. She felt a bit better, but I know that’s a hard thing to do when you are used to ripping on yourself and blaming yourself. -
Then she woke up after running her first full loop of Libertine ZP. The first thing she said when she looked in the mirror was “Wow, I’m hot!”.
In our entire relationship I have never heard her say anything positive about her appearance with that kind of feeling. -
We went and ran some errands and I tried to make eye contact with as many people as I could. Mostly women, but I tried with everyone. It was weird. Virtually no one would lock eyes with me. I looked at their eyes and they were looking everywhere else.
-
I did notice a weird effect. I seem to be getting impressions or information on people just by looking at them. Hard to explain, I’ll get into it deeper when I can think it out more.
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The good news is that while the wife was doing something, I actually deliberately started a conversation with a woman I found cute. Short curvy redhead, definitely my type. I saw her and just decided to say something. I had no intention of hitting on her, the goal was just to approach, say something, and get a response.
I ended up just commenting on her T shirt. She responded and we talked for a minute. Mission accomplished, and I felt no nervousness or the “I don’t know what to say” feeling I always used to.
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are you still doing the practice interviews like before when on Dragon Emperor?
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Every work day.
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-
Last night, I just absolutely nailed one of my practice oral board questions. It was a fairly complex question, and I ratted off a well thought out answer instantly. It was a thing of beauty.
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Not only are the wife and I having a lot more sex, but we are bonding better than ever. I am acting masculine and like I’m in charge, I’ve got this, and I know what I’m doing. She’s quite happy following my lead on most things, shows me respect, and is generally acting feminine.
Not that she’s a doormat. I’d never expect that from her, and definitely don’t want it, but she voices any complaints reasonably. This is a hard one eighty from how she was a while ago.
Consequently, I want her more and she wants me more. -
Matter of fact, I find her hotter than I have since the beginning. In the last few days, that’s probably the effect of Libertine, but it started before that. I can’t say that I think she looks any different but there’s something different about how I’m perceiving her.
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Diamond continues to amaze. First off, I’m feeling like I’m sixteen again. We’ve gone at it pretty much at least once a day for the last few weeks, but I’m still waking up with a serious case of morning wood every day, and getting random wood throughout the day. It was rare at work before, but now is common.
The wife is having multiples every single time too. I know because she says so, and certain physical reactions can’t be faked.
On the ME front, I noticed the last time I used my bathmate that there has already been some measurable growth. The thing has measurements on it. Half a damn inch already. -
The wife and I had a conversation about seeking other partners. It’s kind of strange. Us growing closer has made that seem more realistic and desirable.
She said that she was a bit worried about being replaced, but I told her that any girl who tries to come between us or so much as makes a disrespectful comment about her is history.
She seemed pleased by that response and said she has the same rules.
This is going to be interesting. I think it’ll wind up being a good thing for us. Last we spoke about it she was still feeling a little bad about the last one not working out. We’ll see what Seductress does for her. I saw that it just changed from planned to in progress. -
I’m actually starting to plan out how I’m going to go about finding a side chick.
I’m way out of practice actually trying to meet and seduce women, so I’m not going to be starting with “hard targets”. I’ve got kind of a profile worked up in my head of the type of woman I’m looking for.
That was part of that getting information on people thing I experienced in the store. Like “she fits the profile”, she doesn’t because of X reason.
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- I just submitted Dominus Maximus for the custom ZP test.
If I get that, or when I can get ZP customs, I may modify my plan for the year. I think I’d like to keep running Emperor and when possible DM throughout the year, and simply change the other two titles around as I feel like it.
Once I can buy ZP customs, I may just make up a seduction title with PS and Wanted in it, and run that and DM for the rest of the year. That should give me good progress.
I suspect that next year is going to be The Year of the Khan.
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- I just did something very healthy. Something I wouldn’t have done a year ago.
My wife is still taking it intermittently hard that that guy flaked on her. It seems to hit her at night.
(Yes, this is a weird situation, we’re open so I’m ok with her seeing another guy, I’ve seen a few other girls over the years)
She kept interpreting the situation in the way that casts the worst possible light on her. Makes her feel maximally bad about herself.
I kept offering alternate explanations, but she just kept arguing against herself. Kept trying to make herself feel as bad as she possibly could.
I started to feel this kind of panicky feeling, I was trying to forcefully pull someone out of a nosedive into the gutter and they were insisting on aiming right for that dark pit like a goddamn guided missile.
I felt the old I HAVE TO SAVE them feeling. It’s quite distressing and something I’ve been dealing with all of my life. I feel that it’s my obligation to get them out of that dark place even if I have to jump in and take all of the damage for them, then pull them out.
It started with my father. He ripped on himself left and right and I spent a lot of my childhood terrified that he would finally talk himself into suicide. It continued with my first girlfriend, and I’ve felt the need to save quite a few other people from themselves over the years.
DR brought this to the surface quite a bit last year.
Shortly after this feeling started tonight, I recognized it for what it was. An old learned response caused by childhood trauma.
And I realized that I don’t have to SAVE her from the mental course that she insists on following. Not only that, but I can’t, and if I keep trying I’ll only hurt myself.
I said something like “Babe, I don’t want you to crash your self esteem into the gutter, but if you insist on doing it, I can’t stop you,”. “I’ll help you through this, but you need to help me help you by actually taking one of the alternate explanations to heart,”.
I can throw someone a rope, but if they refuse to climb, thats on them.
This is another result of DR. Before it, I’m quite sure I would just have gone right on acting out the trauma programming and traumatized myself further. This time I broke it.
I also successfully set a boundary. People have been using my need to “save” people to steal my mental energy and get me to solve all of their problems all my life.
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