I can’t tell if anything has shifted or what the anchor of the recon was.
And made some not so wise decisions on my dietary consumption.
However, let’s see how tonight’s sleep goes.
1 Like
Is there such a thing as state?
You know, I used to believe that “your state determines your lived reality” and truly that was my reality, shifting states and the world reflecting that back to me.
People readily responding to my state anytime.
Till I worked with Khan.
I experienced the fact that there was something possibly beyond state. An aspect of me that reality gets pulled toward. A distinct nature had awakened.
Regardless of state or how I consciously viewed myself in any moment, this aspect attracted admiration, power and sexuality.
I change my state, but external reactions didn’t match it. They kept responding to the nature that had awakened.
People wanting to be around me, to talk, to touch, to receive my gaze, just something from me, even when I consciously communicate otherwise with my behavior. If I don’t outright walk out, ignore or tell them, they keep engaging.
I never understood it then, just accepted it as my reality. Hell, I was even confused when I started noticing this.
Now, state mostly affects my own behavior, flow and satisfaction with the moment. Only mirroring externally mostly when it’s a healing state.
I understand now and see why the sub is such a heavyweight. Achieving something like this could not have been easy.
2 Likes
It’s kind of interesting that this entire phase I’m in now is so I can return to Khan as a more realized me in this current aspect. Tried to do it with Khan, but it just wasn’t the right tool.
The acquisition of skills, establishment of structure, realization of the body, elevation in wealth and social circles.
Khan was supposed to return in 4 months, then got extended to 6, then 8, now it’s probably a year. The goal never changed, maybe the actual milestones got a bit grander, but only because they are still possible if I embody my desired level of mastery. So why not just aim higher?
Along the journey I continue to realize the potential amount of work required and I’m adjusting my timeline as I go.
About this
I slept like I got knocked out for about 7 hours😂
No dream or dream recall, if there was one.
Gut kind of disturbed. That’s on me.
Energy levels are normal. Had high sexual arousal upon waking, but it’s tapering off now.
GG 00:30
Got really hungry immediately after the loop.
Besides that, GLM expressed significantly this morning.
- More relaxed
- Voice is steady and deep with a rumble veiled underneath, like a softened rolling storm.
- Craving self-actualization and deeper embodiment.
- Stressful situations are less stressful
- Craving massages again, always get this on GLM😂
2 Likes
ASBR earlier on Thursday. Khan from Thursday to Friday, Wanted on Saturday. GLM earlier today. Then Wanted again this night.
Now, I’m certain that I’m re-expressing/re-processing subs I used in the past.
There’s two more things too.
I’m experiencing an improvement in freedom with my friends and moments with them seem more beautiful?
Then I’m holding more eye contact within genuine laughter.
Usually, eye contact feels like a bridge connecting my world and and that of others. This bridge continues to deepen with each moment it is left open, so in other to regulate the depth of connection, I break it in intervals—by shifting my gaze momentarily or putting up a wall through holding a more aggressive/serious state.
Laughter deepens the strength of the bridge by a lot within an extremely short time, and that level of vulnerability is “???” on me. (About the question marks. words like “hard,” “dangerous” and a couple others came to me, but each one didn’t seem right and for some reason I feel strongly oppressed to using them).
Putting up a wall directly interferes with the experience of laughter, so I look away while laughing in a playful manner.
This weekend I’ve laughed about four times, without the need to break connection.
3 Likes
Not sure why, but there’s a feeling that my second set of results in the previous post is related to trust.
To be more specific, an improved capacity to trust
This is something that was recognized 3 years ago, along with all the “whys” behind it. However, it hasn’t really been touched regardless of the amount of awareness put into it all these years.
3 Likes
This is interesting.
The speed and depth of results are insane but it feels like nothing is happening at all.
And no, this isn’t recon.
I can’t perceive any classical form of processing, expression or sensory effect (since the first loop) on GG.
It’s like not running any sub, but going straight into the integration phase.
3 Likes
Got two stack ideas, they’re not part of the plan, I just think they’ll be really interesting to see
3 Likes
Been entering states I can only describe as euphoria mixed with a sense of fulfillment. It’s unlike anything I’ve experienced before.
In moments like this, I feel like screaming “woohoo” at the top of my lungs, cos I just feel so good and liberated (?)
Started noticing this more when I took a walk on Sunday night. Took my damn time all through, extended it to about two times the usual time it takes to my destination.
This has continued till today.
EDIT: Never been high on psychedelics before, but I imagine this is a scaled down version of how it feels like.
4 Likes
It’s because Summertime has no demands or “skills,” that’s it’s helping you develop. That which is developed is the end result of you… well, just living your life.
3 Likes
But I’ve not run Summertime at all 
For now, my current stack is my Sage Immortal + Singularity major name embed, which I named Golden Gates (GG)
2 Likes
New things today
- Spontaneously got the urge to look up tai chi teachers around me and anyone who didn’t put up a clear line of lineage was ignored. First step here I guess
- Seemed I tweaked my right hip, while walking? Sounds ridiculous to me, but I woke up this morning with some radiating pain that originates on the back area of my femur, a couple inches away from my hip joint. Skipped gym today.
- Recovery still shit. And strength progression plateaued. And I’m certain it’s cos of my workout intensity. Dipping more and more into nervous system exhaustion.
1 Like
GG 1:15
Was planning to go for 1 min, but listened more by mistake.
….
Something I haven’t noted on here is the clairvoyant dreams I’ve been having since the moment I placed in my order for GG.
Not my first time, been having dreams of this nature for as long as I can remember, it seems to run in the family.
However, anytime I use subs that concern spirituality, this ability becomes more consistent. Although, It’s not within my range of conscious influence but seems the gateway to the part of my self that houses this spiritual connection gets strengthened.
I’m not going to share them, but the nature of these dreams have shifted to be more direct/literal in a sense. Honestly, I still don’t like the implication of what has been revealed.
It’s the same message repeated over and over, especially in my waking life. And it’s one of the reasons I dropped RoS last year.
I think it might be time to genuinely enter the cave, for about a month or two.
Considering my stack, I’m most likely going to focus in on wealth by adding ASBR & RICH.
GG will be there for
- Expanding my base/capacity
- Regulation & balancing
- Energetic development
- Spiritual development
- Self unification and mastery
3 Likes
Woke up this morning feeling disconnected, like I’m a couple steps from being in the very present moment in my reality.
It then extends further that I’m behind on the amount of growth I set out to have experienced by now.
Now, it feels like I’m stuck.
Recon.
1 Like
I’ve been getting literal predictions of real life being used as symbolism in dreams. It’s kinda trippy but makes sense since the future is also just information that needs to be processed, so it can be used just like the events that have already happened (because in a way they already have).
No insight on the actual phenomenon itself, but it’s almost always when I’m actively listening to ASBR. Maybe an alignment of the sub and how one perceives their future reality?
3 Likes
That’s quite the interesting perspective. If you don’t mind, could you dive more into this.
I get this feeling particularly on ASBR, but this one is different. There is no intent or subconscious driver to perceive future reality. It’s more like I’m “being shown” because I’d satisfied a certain depth of connection.
2 Likes
Recon
- I honestly can’t tell how I spent my time today, I wasn’t conscious of it.
- Spent time lounging with friends
- Some fears coming strong to the surface, particularly about achievement, growth and freedom
- Been noticing some comparisons come to the surface of my mind recently. Just observing them and most seem to relate to health, physicality and sexual prowess.
Changes and sub expression
- The above seem tied to the desire to be the best, a being very few can match. An experience that causes an inversion in somebody’s story, one you encounter and never remain the same. A conqueror, the Khan.
- Despite all the fears and projections erupting from within, activity might not align, but the way I carry myself doesn’t falter. Well this has been the case for almost a year now, not really new but seems more stable.
- Sexual arousal has returned to baseline, now I’m getting the urge to just approach beautiful ladies. Probably a revisit of PRIMAL, same way I went through other subs last week.
- Noticing a level of bluntness/directness expressing in my behavior, I don’t even bother to soften my expressions anymore. It’s been there but suppressed and veiled for the longest time, probably cos I wasn’t comfortable expressing that way unless in a confrontation. Now it’s more integrated.
- Despite the level of bluntness, I don’t seem to have a domineering/bitchy demeanor like how I was two years ago. Now, it’s still intimidating, but it feels open and sexy.
- Been getting lost in my eyes while I’m in the gym. I just keep staring both during set and during rest.
Health
- Two persistent health issues flared up today, got me shaken up a bit. Which then triggered more fear, frustration and then planning to resolve all health issues for good.
- Hip pain from yesterday vanished.
- First time in a while my body wasn’t tremoring throughout the day.
- Got to the gym and my strength on all exercises were up, didn’t push till the failure despite that.
- One health issue flare up died down after gym session.
General
If my strength still shows progress next week, I’m going to keep doing exactly what I did today no changes, till I get to my peak before I fell sick. By then I should have hit my wealth (focused) goals. Then I’ll reorganize my entire training approach to align with my actual health & physicality strategy, from the very basics. I can add The Engineer then.
Grooming and aesthetics
- Tried to shower fast, but I just couldn’t. Took my damn time and loved it.
- Shaved
- Changing up my hairstyle.
- Still interested in fashion
- Still concerned about fixing my skin health.
- Still tweaking my cosmetics.
1 Like
After the gym today, something dawned on me
I need a practice, actually two—one to dive into my mind and another into my body.
I’m still subconsciously leaning more towards using these for transformation, but I want to wield them beyond that, for the purpose of exploration.
Practices up for selection
- Self hypnosis for the mind. This opens a gateway for so many aspects and skills under this category, both for focused work and exploration. Also very transferable. Dabbled in it before, but wasn’t really successful due to very spotty practice. Was able to apply some concepts from here in my daily life though.
- Tai Chi → Martial arts for body
- Rope flow for body.
1 Like
Outside of any specific “time isn’t linear” beliefs, it makes sense that there would be events that are highly probable to happen the next day. The predictions I’ve gotten are a mix of interpersonal things and just sheer reads that ended up correct.
One of my first that I had two years ago, had me meet a specific PhD student at my school twice as coincidence. And after the second time, I had a vivid dream involving her. I obviously didn’t think much of it back then and don’t remember the specifics of the dream, just that she was prominent and I was confused why. About 7 months later, when the head of this department was helping me join a lab, this PhD student just so happened to be the one that wanted another undergrad.
I consider that one more of a sheer read with my subconscious weighing the fact that I would want to start working in a lab soon with a person it could somehow tell was open to me working for them, despite neither of us knowing it at the time.
An interpersonal one would be a few days ago when before I went to bed, I started thinking about a meeting I had the next day and how it would be “logical” for it to be moved to a specific time. When I woke up I remembered it and thought it sounded stupid, since there was no actual “logic” I remembered following. About 10 minutes later I get a text asking for the meeting to be moved to the exact time I thought it should’ve been moved to the night before. It turned out one of the people had a list minute appointment they needed to go to.
That I chalk up to being more interpersonal, with there being more “easy” subconscious communication to pinpoint it to. Me and the other person were communicating subconsciously the night before without realizing it. I get this kind of thing a lot where I will get a message in my sleep before I get it for real the next day, so I kind of group that kind of thing together.
Although you could make the argument that both of those point to the same phenomenon, I feel like one is distinctly more probabilistic and involves infinitely more factors. So while they both may be subconscious communication, one has an immediate medium of expression (getting a text) vs one having one a few mediums away (me needing to reach out to this specific professor at the exact time this specific PhD wanted an undergrad).
1 Like