The Adventures of SubliminalUser

Journals - Major Programs
#250

Great news everyone. I tested for the virus again earlier today and I tested negative. :smiley:

I expect some things to start picking up again after the weekend. I’m perfectly fine still taking things easy

@RVConsultant It’s exciting you mention Dragon Reborn. Man, that was some journey back then. I just got a notification today that one of my posts about the DR got 10 likes. And of course, I was called in recently to talk about my DR experiences. In retrospect, it’s incredible how I dedicated so much of my subliminal listening time to just that sub alone.

DR alone was from December 2020 to July 2021. In other words, if we were to look at sub usage this year I am just now getting to the month where I would have stopped using DR. But instead, this year I have run so many different subs so far:

  • Ascension Chamber
  • Chosen
  • ME
  • Emperor
  • Ascension
  • Paragon
  • EF ST2
  • Primal
  • Khan ST1
  • Rebirth
  • Man Finds Others (Custom)
  • Love Bomb For Humanity

Seeing this just looks even crazier in retrospect that I had run just one multistage during the same months last year. I’m also grateful that I was afforded the opportunity to do such. And of course, it’s valuable to me and the wider community whenever one wants to revisit my journey and see the changes I went through then.

Now, what would it look like if I were to revisit DR ST4 via ZP? Honestly, I don’t know what would happen. I also don’t plan on such a thing anytime soon. Only a life event of great calamity could motivate me to drop everything to do the truly-heavy level of general healing that DR ST4 would focus on.

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#251

Great news. Have a fantastic and healthy August!:+1::clap:

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#252

I initially opened up this journal entry intending to journal quite seriously about the thoughts and feelings I have had throughout the day. However, the hot shower preceding this, as well as the various random funny YouTube videos I got myself into got me off track as well as also a bit more lighthearted. Perhaps it’s a good thing I encountered those, because I realize at the end of the day a lot of these thoughts are just that—thoughts. They simply present a perspective on the current situation, which isn’t that problematic in of itself. Let’s see whether I can describe it all in the span of one pomodoro.

Virus Fears

First things first, what did the virus do? I’ve isolated for a week and I haven’t gone out much at all. The first change was when the move began a few days ago, but even then I wouldn’t really consider that going out much at all. There were periods where I was at the new place by myself, setting things up for hours at a time. What am I getting at? Essentially, weathering the virus became not only a physical challenge but also a mental challenge. This unexpected development seriously threw me off guard. And when I started to search up things like “COVID effects on brain” and read the titles I started to worry. I started to get a bit dramatic, one might say. There’s no conclusive evidence that COVID has a long-term negative affect on the brain, although I have read some headlines about people having “long covid” symptoms related to the brain. But that’s the thing. These are headlines.

I’ve done no serious research into this stuff. I just looked at a few news headlines, a few video titles and then I started thinking pessimistically about the long-term impacts of the virus. That’s one problem in of itself—jumping to conclusions too quickly. A good friend suggested, what if it’s just the extended period of isolation that many people had to endure during the pandemic that is getting mixed up with this? We may be getting that mixed up with the notion of the virus actually changing something physically/chemically in the brain. He’s got a point, and I do agree that being stuck at home has what really sucked. Once I start going out and about again I should see myself getting better.

And look, I’m one of the last people I know who has gotten the virus. Various people I know have gotten it throughout the pandemic, recovered, and gone on with their lives. None of them are experiencing long-term effects as far as I see or know. It’s not that bad.

My action here is to just give myself the physical and mental space to fully recover. I may have tested negative recently, but I feel I should not push myself too hard just yet. And the mental stuff, well I am accomplishing that by journaling here as well as pausing some other threads.

Moving Out Fears

So the other side to the mental challenge recently has been with moving out. I can clearly see that the mental challenges from the virus got mixed up with those of moving out. It’s unfortunate timing that the one and only time I have gotten the virus occurred during one of the biggest events of my entire life.

I got a bit scared about the change. I had a fear of change come up earlier which I helped myself process with some EFT (what a great technique)! In revisiting why I am moving, one reason (among many) for it is that I was afraid I’d never grown up properly if I didn’t move out and live away from my parents for a bit. When I became aware of this reason I became a little sad. “fear of never growing up.” But why would I be sad about this when I am now taking the very step that would resolve that? I found that odd. There must be more to it. Maybe it’s more about the challenges to be encountered in the process. Hmm…

Another thing that disturbed me came from thinking, what does moving out accomplish? Well, one practical reason is that it is a lot easier for me to date and form romantic relationships while I have my own place. Not knocking that. But I started to think ahead more about what I really want out of life. Chiefly, the big thing I felt I wanted next in my life is a fulfilling long-term relationship. After that is to have my own house. But see, owning a house was something I wasn’t thinking of doing until around a decade into the future. Now I can get into why I’ve thought like that for the house—the area where I live is expensive even considering how much my job pays, and I don’t want to be locked down to my area (not sure if I’d stay here when I’d want to move to a house), etc. But examining these thoughts I see some issues.

  • The economic downturn that’s on its way suggests that perhaps housing can crash and it’d be a good time to buy. But even then, where? And would I want to live there?
    • This last question might have a false premise; I don’t necessarily have to buy one to live in, I could buy one for purposes of real estate investment or for a stream of passive income (rent).
    • I also have a fear that I won’t have enough cash on hand when the time comes. I especially would not want that to be known to my parents. Well, I already started stockpiling on cash and not doing much with investing instruments…
  • When I have my relationship and I have my house (which I deferred a decade out)…is that it? Is that really all I am to accomplish in life? This made me feel down like I am some ordinary joe schmoe who doesn’t have any ambitions to do anything great. It felt like I was seriously shortchanging myself and the potential for greatness that I have. To say nothing of the fact that in that short list of two items I didn’t make any mention of accomplishing my life purpose.
    • It reminds me of myself during my school days when I was known as that “smart kid” and not much else. And when I’d go back home and finish my homework I’d just play video games or something like that the rest of the day. (To be fair, being the smart kid very much positively impacted the following stages in ways I felt were important).
    • In seeing this I feel that I should accomplish the goal of having a house much sooner. Be open to real estate investing for purposes of asset value appreciation and passive income. Why limit myself to the idea or belief (!) that I won’t have a house until that far in the future?
    • I feel I owe it to myself to be awesome and very driven towards being a superb and highly accomplished human being. One who serves as a great example to others. I do not want to become complacent after getting the two aforementioned things and letting the rest of my life (existing or potential) fall by the wayside. That to me simply sucks. I want to keep pushing forward.
    • The flip side to the whole “Is that it?” question is that I may be jumping a little ahead. I don’t even have the first aforementioned thing as of this writing. However I think it’s important to question the overall mentality right now since the broader picture it suggests—encoded as beliefs and assumptions that may have been residing subconsciously—would then influence how I go about accomplishing these first two things or perhaps even how quickly I’d accomplish them. Well, I’m telling myself right now—Yes, I can take my time to do these things properly. However, don’t think they are the only things to do. Nor should I feel I can do only one thing at a time.

So yea, that’s where I am currently at. I wonder if LBFH, MFO, Khan ST1 or AsCh has anything to do with these mental developments and internal monologues as of late…

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#253

Rest Day.

In this entry we take another look at my inner machinations. A lot of the mental stresses surrounding my changing life seem to not be here today. Highlights of today:

  • First day back at work since last Tuesday. I was working from home, to be sure. However, this time I was able to get stuff done. I treated today’s workday as a way to test the waters, see how I’m feeling. Well, I feel confident about being able to work the rest of the week. While people have suggested a “two-week COVID leave” I can’t really do that given the current duties of my role, which among other things giving a final evaluation for a direct report by the end of this week.
  • In the evening, I got my mattress set up at my new place and got one of the final pieces of living room furniture set up. What now stops me from fully moving in is that my standing desk hasn’t arrived yet. I don’t have plans to go into the office this week, and unfortunately, my standing desk isn’t arriving until the second half of this week. So I won’t be fully moved in for a bit longer…which is fine, because like I’ve been saying, I want to be fully mentally resolved before doing that.

Thankfully, at no point today did I feel the mental turmoil that I felt yesterday. I can attribute this to the subliminals (healing-heavy stack, remember), journaling, conversations, and rest that I’ve had recently. Sleep is important, too. To be sure, there are still some things I want to deal with and I’ll see where EFT and private journaling can take me before I report back on those.

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#254

I’ve heard NAC at about 600 mg can help with that.

@Leandros

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#255

He seems fine.

If not NAC (N-Acetyl-Cysteine) is the way to go.

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#256

It appears I am undergoing some kind of self-imposed internal frame battle. How am I going to change?

I am once again on a deeply internal journey. I feel that my life has had a lot of that. It’s mostly been an internal journey. This is something I’ve appreciated throughout the years as the introspection has allowed me to understand myself better and make some paradigm shifts. Now, however, I am a bit annoyed. When it’s going to stop being internal only, and when will I see the results in the external world?

Perhaps I am not looking hard enough. Obviously the move is a big change. I’m changing my entire environment as well as the conditions I’m going to be in daily, which will lead to different outcomes. Sure, this is a result. But then I read about the wonderful results people are having on LBFH, the profound outer effects some got with Khan ST1, and stellar manifestations on IC and HS (such that it motivated me to build my custom), and I start to wonder, what am I doing exactly?

In a way, it feels like I am always walking or running towards my big goals but I never quite reach them, not in the way I see others on this forum reach them. But really, when I look at the specific goals I have in mind when I write this (namely the goals of MFO), I see that it’s only been about a month into subliminal-manifesting and my stack is dedicated to healing and not to action. I would’ve liked to see more things in the outer world reflect that healing, but I suppose the recent extended stay at home due to the virus means the observation of those outer changes has been deferred. I say deferred because I’m sure that it’ll be easier to see things change once I start going out often again. That, and move to a stack that is not around healing…

Yea. I can say as I’m writing this that I’m annoyed with running healing stacks. This is despite their perceived necessity. I know it simply comes down to wanting the results now. “It should have been here yesterday!” How much more healing could I possibly need to do? Could the healing inherent in ZP titles be enough? That’s what I am betting on with the stacks I’ve designed for after stack 5 ends.

It gives me solace that I never quite needed a healing phase for the first half of the year, where the stacks were designed around manifestation and career development. Any healing I got was from the healing inherent in ZP. Of course, I don’t have as many hangups about career advancement as I have had about the topics of MFO.

ZP is decidedly a build that focuses on changing the inner world first. I wish there was more to having the outer change more quickly. I can’t believe I’m saying that, given how this is the most powerful tech so far. Well, for faster results there are two more advancements I can think of off the top of my head that would speed things up even further…the first is name-embedding. I imagine that SC is already trying to work on both of the advancements to improve results even more.

I just wonder sometimes, why am I like this? Sure I am introspective and that has been a valuable asset throughout my life. But why do I get so stuck in my mind (and for so long) before things materially improve?*

*Well, this may have uncovered a limiting belief. Also, I realize I may be getting impatient about results in a domain I admittedly have not taken serious action on in a long time (sometimes intentionally so, as in the case of earlier this year) and this beginning itself is, once again, a healing phase. A phase which subliminally ends in less than two weeks, at that.

#257

You got that right!:heart::+1::clap:

#258

Reflecting on today. It was a rest day, but a good deal of things still happened.

A lot of the craziness today has to do with some unexpected developments regarding the intern on my team. Unfortunately, there have been changes in company policy that have taken me and others by surprise. To summarize, I feel these changes are a bit unfair and so does the intern. We’ve been put in a tough spot and it was the focus of multiple meetings today…anyway because there’s a follow-up on that which go all the way through Friday I’m not going to complete the move until Friday after work. That’s alright.

I feel bad for the intern and for myself for overoptimistically reading the situation for so long. However, as a few good peeps have reminded me it’s not all my fault. I’ve been subject to a lot of forces that are not directly within my control (namely the decisions made by higher-ups at the company, which in turn are certainly influenced by changes in macroeconomic conditions) and I’ve done the best I could. I’ll be thinking more about how I can help that individual out for the rest of this week and in the remainder of their time.

Let’s revisit the concerns I shared in my last long entry. The highlight of today for me was my hangout with someone I haven’t been able to meet up with in a while, where I got a lot more hope about my situation. My last journal entry was motivated specifically by how there isn’t anything going on in the department of romance/dating right now; meanwhile, this guy has had a great breakthrough recently, even manifesting someone who fit the criteria they defined on a sheet of paper. Even more interesting is that he’s got multiple people right now. What happened? In this meetup, I got to learn more about what he did. There’s a lot that happened, including having access to some of the right online resources (paid and otherwise) that got him to where he is right now.

  • When I was first hearing all this stuff I was pretty happy for him and proud he got to pull off manifesting, but at the same time, I was feeling a bit down for myself given my current circumstance. Here I simply opened up to him about this sentiment. This sentiment simply became difficult to contain especially in the face of an individual who is surprisingly similar to me in some interesting ways. “What’s wrong with me?” I had thought.
  • During the discussion I was reminded that I basically just got started on doing anything about this and that I haven’t opened up the right pathways just yet. For example, I’m currently not on the apps while on the other hand, this guy has had all his breakthroughs through there (even the SP manifestation)
  • In certain parts of the conversation when he was explaining the surprising clarity he had gotten as well as the simplicity in certain aspects of the process (“You just need a few good shirts”) I had some mixed feelings, especially about the simplicity. I’m generally considered more stylish than a lot of fellow peers and I’m still here. Do I have a problem? However, the way he reconciled his understanding of the challenge—and now I am reconciling it—is that things in this department don’t quite relate to knowledge in such a linear way. It’s like there are a few key pieces that need to be known the most, and those pieces are what got him so far in the process. This was likened to the Pareto principle. Another dose of hope here.
  • He is confident that should I study the aforementioned resources (which he is willing to share!) and put in the effort I would succeed, just like him. I was reassured and cheered up a few times throughout this conversation, which I will admit: I needed those. I needed the reassurance that things will at least be okay.

At the end of this whole conversation, I got more hope about my current situation and my ability to get to where I want to be in my dating life. Pretty glad I got to meet this guy, impart my knowledge in previous meetups and help him be successful. I’m going to get there myself now.

#259

Listened:

  • LBFH
  • Khan ST1

Honestly, a lot of changes have been going on and it’s hard for me to plainly identify what subs are connected with what outcomes in real life. The one strong connection I see is that the speed at which I have been resolving some inner challenges and conflicts has been considerably quickened as of late.

Anyway, today marks the first full day at the new place. I spent a great deal of the day setting up my main workspace, and even that is not complete yet. I also have some gripes about how my desk is set up, but I think it is possible to work with and improve upon. I’ll be doing that tomorrow. A bit annoying right now, but I must get through to finish this entry!

The second half of the day was more eventful thanks to a friend of mine reaching out to confirm a hangout that lasted all the way through the evening. I am also glad this friend did this as it helped me feel better in light of all the changes and mental battles I’ve had lately. Another thing is that in my last few conversations with this individual, it became apparent to me that I was dramatizing some of the challenges that were going through my mind; simply put, I was exaggerating their severity and potential impact. I knew for some time that my mind liked to make a mountain out of a molehill, but seeing it come out in these last few conversations combined with my recent keen to resolve the inner turmoil stirred up in these past few weeks has made it much clearer still. Perhaps I can and should change this, because dramatization to this extent would be untenable in this current time period of my life where many changes have and will continue to occur. For me to maintain my sanity I must adjust to the expectation that plenty of changes are afoot and there will be a few ups and downs. The downs, particularly the extent to which I perceive them as downs, should be heavily scrutinized and looked at with the proper context (as opposed to seeing or stating them in absolutes as I have had a habit of doing).

Because really, the challenges I have aren’t that bad. They’re solvable. More than that, in fact. I’ll have to put in some effort, but there’s a way out. Some people have shown me the way. And if I don’t know yet, the world is going to present me that way. That’s just part of my reality and how I manifest.

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#260

It took a bit more effort than expected to rearrange some things in my room. I need to take a break before continuing.

My brain is telling me “Hey, you did a lot of work there—why not take some rest?” That’s a fair request, what’s not great are the suggestion for how that rest should be conducted. I’m going to go outside for a little bit.

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#261

Listened:

  • LBFH (5 min)
  • MFO (7 min)
  • AsCh (7 min)

I highlight the listening times to showcase how variegated my listening pattern is right now. I run LBFH with the shortest duration because I am running it every other day. I am running it every other day until the washout that precedes the end of stack 5b.

Today marked my first day back in the office and quite a few were happy to see me! The funny thing is, it was also a day when several people decided not to come to the office for some unknown reason. Oh well. Lunch was good and I worked on some lower-priority things, but for the most part, I wasn’t feeling motivated to be there. I was happy enough that people received my return positively.

The most interesting turn of today was when one of my coworkers wanted to get dinner with me to talk about some real stuff. You see, I’ve had a lot of doubts and internal challenges come up over the past few weeks since getting the virus as I’ve been writing extensively about in my recent entries. As it turns out, he’s had a bit of inner turmoil in the same timeframe. So over dinner, I got to hear all about that. Hearing all of that stuff was interesting because it made me get the notion of “we’re in this together.” It enabled me to further reflect on my own situation and also do some comparing and contrasting. The way in which he responded to his own situation was intriguing as it reflects a fundamental difference in the way we operate when it comes to motivation.

Anyway, I haven’t been so productive in getting things setup since coming back to my place this evening. Let’s change that!

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#262

Rest day. Quickly journaling for today because it’s relatively late already.

It was another day at the office, however, the most novel experiences were trying out the gym that’s at the office campus as well as a special hang that occurred after work. The work gym was cool since it featured some special powerlifting equipment I don’t have at my place. I see myself using both the work gym and the gym that’s in my apartment complex depending on the day and circumstance.

The hangout after work was special since it was with someone else who is moving out of the area. They are moving out of the entire area—different from what I did—for educational reasons. Somehow I did not feel too sad about it. While they are going far, it’s still within driving distance. I will be sure to do a trip to that particular city since I have under-explored it and also to visit them. Anyway, it was cool because they also wanted to celebrate my recent move, and give me a gift for it too!

I feel more optimistic about my life situation getting better in the near future.

4 Likes
#263

Yesterday

Listened:

  • LBFH
  • Khan ST1

It was a rather odd day if I’m being honest. I got caught in some funky business on this day (including with one car-related item) and I just didn’t give myself the space to journal.

It’s also on this day that I came up with an idea for stack 6. Instead of listening first thing in the morning I’m going to listen in the evening, closer to bed-time. I’m going to make that a consistent pattern. I want to see what happens as a result of this.

Today

Rest day.

It’s an interesting day because people started saying good byes to the interns on our team, as they won’t be in office tomorrow when the interns themselves complete their final day. As people said these goodbyes I started to get reflective about my life. I once worked at this very company as an intern. What had changed in my life between then and now? Unfortunately, I took the pessimistic route in answering this (all in my mind) by suggesting that not much has changed and that I should feel sad for that.

However, writing this out right now it feels kind of funny to say that, especially when juxtaposed with the fact that late in the workday an intern found one of my photos that is now a few years old and remarked that I looked so different in that photo. And I do agree, I do look quite different in that photo. It reflects the actions I took around that time, as well as the actions I have taken since. To be very clear, I’m not judging myself to say that I looked better in the old photo vs now, or vice-versa: simply that I have actually done a lot between then and now (and the old photo was taken earlier in my time at the company).

How could I say not much has changed in the years? Saying such a thing does a disservice to everything that I’ve documented on this site, through all the journals I’ve had. Sure there are some things that haven’t changed as much, but I may be over-indexing on the significance of these things:

  • I’m still at the same company (but I’ve risen up the ranks and done a lot there).
  • I’m still in the same general area—or part of the country if you will. But I’ve traveled to a lot of places and I will be going to even more in the near future. A huge trip is planned during October, after all. And also, I’m no longer living at my parents’ place.

And I’ve literally been through a recent huge current of change, thanks to the virus and the move. So it seems almost humorous right now that even as I type all this I feel some sort of sadness.

My mind likes to dwell in negativity as if it is under the presumption that doing so is helpful. Or that I am able to get some sort of sympathy by framing my situation as a negative one. That’s really what it is. This sort of attitude is far from what it once was in terms of intensity. Nonetheless, it comes and goes and when it hits again I am left feeling sorry for myself and asking myself such questions as “Will I ever have lasting happiness?”
“Come on man, the answer is yes!” A part of me says excitedly, trying to cheer me up.

But here I am feeling down, because some people have reminded me of the passage of time :’(

2 Likes
#264

Final Listening Day of Stack 5b

Listened:

  • LBFH
  • MFO

Ran in the morning to continue the new gym streak and also to help my mind process the subs. Then went to work. I was motivated to go primarily to see the people (I mentioned in the previous journal) on their last day before they left the company.

Unfortunately, that current of sadness I elaborated upon yesterday continued in some form throughout the day. I feel that I had manifested this sadness to continue through today because of what I may have carried into the night. The mood did take a slightly different tone due to my frustration with my coworkers. The frustration is a revisit of a topic I’ve discussed here a few times—I feel disconnected from my coworkers (again). My recent period of absence from the office had a factor to do with this. I also am not fond of their antics, particularly the gossiping and cliquey nature they seem to have (to be frank, it’s a particular subset of coworkers when I say this).

But it feels like if I tried to seriously connect with them again—that they might just write me off because I’ve been out of the loop too long.

Anyways, I brought all of these concerns to my good friend and in the discussion, I noticed that after I said these things out loud they sounded a bit funny—should I be taking these thoughts seriously? And also, this individual told me that I was being a bit harsh on myself and underselling all the changes that I have made (and he has clearly observed) over the years. There was also the suggestion to use manifestation to change certain aspects regarding coworkers!

Honestly, I shouldn’t take a lot of these thoughts so seriously. It’s like I mentioned above—it’d’ be hard to maintain sanity if I did this all the time. Also, I have to account for the fact that I have been dealing with a lot of changes recently which have put mental stress on me that I don’t think I have fully recovered from yet. The longer-term effects of the virus related to eating that I have noticed, the move, and all these things at work at the same time are getting to me too much. In retrospect, perhaps it would have suited me better to work from home throughout the entire week instead of at the office nearly every day.

And I am to start on Stack 6 on Aug 16…well, it’s a good thing that I will be doing evening listens instead of morning listens. That increases the washout time by almost a day.

A good deal of turmoil recently has revolved around the question of “When will I find a girlfriend?” Unfortunately, I obsessed over this quite a bit recently and it just made me feel more discontent about my current situation, despite it being pretty good in most other regards. Overthinking certainly did not help. However, I did realize today that it’s not able to explain everything. For example, when I was at the office being disgruntled I thought “If I were in this same situation would I be cool with it because I am in a relationship?” and realized “No, that wouldn’t be enough!”

The truth is, I would like my relationship with my coworkers to be a much more harmonious and friendly one. Almost all of them are within my age group and I haven’t said much that’s wrong recently. The bigger issue is that I haven’t said much at all recently and I have had some fear that I wouldn’t get it right once I do actually try.

This is where I feel Stack 6 can come in, which is unexpected because I didn’t design Stack 6 for this. However, the fact that I have Daredevil AND PCC in this upcoming stack means I have both offense and defense (where PCC is good defense at work) as I get into the social game again.

#265

Is it worth it for me to pause MFO to experiment with Paragon Sleep for 21 days (45 days if I see clear results in the first 21)? I’d do this in stack 6. Wondering whether there’s a severe opportunity cost.

@Lion @Leandros

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#266

Frankly, I myself don’t know when it is the right time to change stacks in terms of long-term results. I know the minimum for each stack is 2 cycles to see results but how to determine when it is the right time to change?

The longer the better of course. But I myself am undecided on what to focus on next due to too many choices lol.

Of course this comes from not having immediate and urgent goals so I guess for both of us the answer will come from the answer “What are your urgent/important goals right now?”. And we will have to decide based on that and choose a stack and run it until we reach those goals.

Either that or be in experimental mode to try things out. Depends on you.

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#267

“Don’t be too hard on yourself.” I’ve heard this a lot this weekend through the various conversations I’ve had…

This weekend has been unusually rich with insightful conversations. It hasn’t been the empty weekend I initially thought it was going to be. It’s why I’m here today to acknowledge that I have made a mental breakthrough regarding how I view my coworkers and how they fit into my overall plan for social goals:

They don’t. At least, not as part of advancing said social goals in any meaningful form.

I still had some inner turmoil over this weekend because I couldn’t really reconcile my desire to be more friendly with them. More precisely, I felt like I was obligated to be more like friends with them rather than the current neutral-ish behavior I have at work, due to several factors (one being that they’re in my age range). However, in an insightful conversation I had this weekend, I was able to clarify my thinking and understand that essentially my desire (or sense of obligation towards them) wasn’t well-founded, to begin with. Yes, I have social goals, and I want to build an amazing scene for myself. However, as my good friend helped me see, these coworkers simply don’t fit into my larger picture. In my imagination for example, I don’t really see them there. Nor am I of the opinion that they could really help me advance in my desired social goals.

So I came to the conclusion that actually, neutrality is the best option for me. I shouldn’t set my expectations high and put in so much effort to change a situation for what is likely little or no return on investment. That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be rude to them. That doesn’t mean I can’t see an opportunity to at least observe subliminal results through my interactions with them. It means my expectations of them and where things will go are going to be much lower, and I will smartly redirect my efforts (time and energy) elsewhere.

I have decided I will not do the jump to run Paragon Sleep. I’ve learned from my runs the first half of this year that results become very profound when I decide to stick with a title and run it for multiple stacks without break. The “Three stacks go a long way” heuristic is something backed up by my experience. With MFO being potentially one of the most transformative subs ever, I will stick with it for stack 6.

Coming up for Stack 6!

  • MFO
  • Daredevil (New!)
  • PCC (New!)
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#269

I can say for a fact that while this washout is only going into its third day, it’s a been an effective one. I say effective instead of good because through the weekend I had a lot of thoughts and emotions come up, oftentimes of a negative variety. It was exacerbated by the fact that I have been at the place all by myself. My flatmate has been gone from the area for a while to deal with a personal matter. Yesterday, there was a point where I was just reeling in sadness for a few hours. That was not a good position to be in.

However, I did get access to a significant resource which I believe will help me greatly with regards to the goals of MFO. I was connected to it by a good friend. One fear that popped up in response to the incoming abundance of success in the romantic space is how I will be able to manage while also being productive at work, planning my next trip which is in October (I’m afraid to say that its planning is still too undeveloped for comfort) and basically running the rest of my life.

Yea. I am starting to believe that I’m going to have such success that that so-called problem could become a real thing. Maybe I’m thinking of that too early, but at the same time, this is partly manifestation-speak. On the other hand, there is a basis for this concern right now. The aforementioned resource is going to take some time to study and put into action. This is a resource I am looking to study while I also deal with the other things I mentioned, such as trip-planning (e.g. finding hotels) and doing some further setup for my apartment. Of course, I also need to be productive at work, too. In other words, I ideally simultaneously do all these things during this week. It’ll be interesting to see where things go…

When Does Stack 6 begin?

Technically, today is the final full day of the washout. However, I want to start stack 6 by doing evening runs. This means that with the first run (anticipated to be Daredevil + PCC) being tomorrow evening, I am pushing closer to four washout days. This is great, because it’ll give my mind further time to process the challenging subs of LBFH and Khan ST1!

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#271

Stack 6

Man Finds Others with Offense and Defense (MFO: O&D)

Given the long-term nature of the continuous manifestation of ideal people through the scripting of MFO, it’s inevitable that I’m going to succeed socially and romantically. Let’s get the skills to make that happen. One can even say that the decision to run Daredevil and PCC is a manifestation of MFO!

Listened:

  • PCC
  • Daredevil (DD — funny acronym since it reminds me of the Marvel superhero)

I originally intended to listen to the above titles in the reverse order but in light of some recent events, I thought it would be more beneficial to be able to initially express the defensive element of my stack.

The vertical bar in this entry delineates stuff before and after I ran the above since I ran it in the middle of the day.

The best news of the day was finding that my intern is going to get a return offer. I have seriously understated in this journal the undertaking that journey was. That intern did a lot of stuff during this summer to earn it, of course. However, I had to sell this HARD, in a time where due to economic conditions the company was not willing to hire even most interns. I am so amazed by how it happened.

  • I had explicitly manifested over a month ago that this would happen. No kidding—I wrote down the outcome that got confirmed today. And I see that there are quite a few subs that were involved in this multi-month process:
    • Chosen
    • ME
    • LBFH
    • MFO (parts of it, like Direct Influencing Aura and Inner Circle, may have helped)
  • I did not run True Sell when making my case for this individual. However, I was running LBFH in stack 5b and I was at the end of the washout when the outcome was confirmed today. It’s really amazing how it happened. Despite there being some conflicting opinions from people who supported my intern, the high-level director overrode those opinions, and here we are. This is just outstandingly unusual.
  • That moment when I was able to share the news…I’m not going to forget. It was such a good feeling and I can easily bring it back to my imagination even now.

I feel so happy about this. I’ve replayed the scene multiple times throughout the day already because of the positive emotion it brings to me. So glad that I was able to lead someone toward great success. And this particular individual is someone I feel I will see again in the future, even after they leave the company soon. I am so glad I was able to do something this impactful for someone, and make some kind of significant difference in a person’s life.

As I journal about this it makes me wonder why I have chosen on numerous occasions recently to pity myself and my situation instead. One of those occasions includes below, which I was focused on before I started this journal entry and thought back to the beginning of the day. My biggest takeaway from the development described above is that my manifestation power has become huge and that I can accomplish anything. I have the ability to positively impact people’s lives and I should always remember that. As I write this I feel a massive dose of optimism about my ability to enact change in my own life.

So later in the middle of the workday (which gets a bit slow), I decide to run the Stack 5b new titles. The particular order is motivated by the following:

I got news recently about a friend getting engaged (no idea about the relationship beforehand) and then heard some funny stuff from my parents about how this relates to me (you all can imagine it, it’s nothing complex but it irks me). And an unrelated event where I’d see my parents again was going to occur in the evening. So I thought hey, let’s activate social defenses.

At that evening event, things were all good—I wasn’t even talking with my parents. However, on the way out, one of them decided to lightheartedly bring up the aforementioned friend’s life development and suggested now it’s my turn next. I didn’t feel so good about that, and that’s when I quickened my exit from the scene.

  • Another comment I wanted to add was how I got complimented that I look so young. I felt happy about this but also a little down when I contextualize it in the current set of things I have been worrying about (“shouldn’t that have helped me with this thing by now?” and “Man, my guessed age reflects a period of my life now long-gone by…”). Well, why worry now? I in the near future am going to be doing actions (such as getting back on the apps) that will heavily leverage this very aspect of myself. I know, I know—this is a little hard to articulate properly, so for the sake of brevity I’m going to leave it at that.

I am not fearful like I once was about this stuff. I am recalling my journal entries where I talked about how I have evolved such that I can’t take that stuff so seriously. Not like I can be coerced. Especially now that I’ve moved out to my own place. The fear left is the fear of conflict. There have been a lot of people who have helped me mentally resolve these things, spanning from friends to people online (thanks @PurpleRT73)!

It’s also pretty clear by now that manifestation helps me with this kind of stuff. Manifesting out of conflict, manifesting having no conflicts in the first place, and of course, manifesting my own solution to dating/romance. However, I have noticed a tendency for me to dramatize problems in my mind and I would like for that to go away. It’s not helpful at all. This is untenable and I’m getting sick of it—it’s been dragging on for weeks now (basically since I got the virus).

  • Is this what they mean by “long covid?” See, I’m dramatizing again…:joy:

Anyway, all of this is why I have PCC in my stack to deeply install a super-defense. With three rotations planned you better believe I’ll be warding off a lot of bullshit. I need to get my emotions together and that’s where PCC can come in and help. I need to solidify an iron frame both internally and externally.

One interesting thing to note: Unlike my first loop of MFO, there’s nothing about today’s experience where I can say the “trailer effect” was in play.

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