I had both of those in the three customs I created.
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One part of healing is to recognize, with bold equanimity, that there are some parts of us that will never heal, in any simplistic, final way.
It may seem ridiculous to say, but it becomes possible to take a certain comfort in this, and in the knowledge that, healed or not, we are determined to walk our path.
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A hard lesson to internalize, but definitely one that will set you free. I think this comes easier to some than others. I know this is a major sticking point for me so it’s interesting to read it in your journal as well.
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I am now in my 2nd week of Dragon Fire.
Made the change.
I was just led to it, and I decided to do it.
I’ll describe the process in another post.
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hmmm…actually, in a nutshell, it was this:
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The significant responses that I experienced to Pride Unbroken and FEBRUUS (in my current custom) demonstrated to me that I would be working on healing right now either way.
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I read two things. The Inner Sky by Steven Forrest (and went down a rabbit hole for a few days) and the article from Saint about Speeding Up Results (specifically, the part on ‘blockages’). My natal chart spelled out in very clear and specific terms what one major block to action was for me. And together with point 1, I felt that working through that ‘blockage’ would be a major current focus.
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In response to a thread that I saw on here two weeks ago, I went and slowly re-read the Dragon Reborn Descriptions about 3 times. And that was the last step. I decided to just take things right to the Healing source. I’m kind of considering Dragon Reborn as the unofficial 21st module of my NAISSANCE custom.
And that’s that.
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The goal of my current subliminal phase is to get me to the point where I am an effective creator.
My inner world, the source of my Vision, will be clarified, developed, and cohered.
The barriers and blockages that exists between my inner world and my outer life will change into bridges and gateways.
Naissance
The Alchemist
Quantum Limitless
Mind’s Eye
Harmonic Singularity
Spiritual Reality Alignment
Pride Unbroken
FEBRUUS
Faith Unyielding
Metamorphosis
Avatar
Immortal’s Blade
Astral Projection
Remote Viewing
Foundation
Dynasty
Wayfinder
Khronos Key
RAIKOV
The Merger of Worlds
Mosaic
and
Dragon Reborn
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I am Wrong and I am also Right,
I am True and I am also False,
I am the ultimate Power
and I am also the precise shape of your Powerlessness;
What Am I?
A choice
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If you realize the fact that who you fundamentally are as a person–your basic, defining characteristic and qualities–are alright, everything becomes easier;
If you feel that you are not alright, everything becomes much more difficult.
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Self-respect does not equal loudly and aggressively declaiming your value.
It is knowing your value.
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Any time that you pay attention,
it’s an investment of your soul.
It’s a kind of worship.
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Find/Create your own sanctuaries and oases.
You deserve them
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Mood’s going up and down.
Today, I audio-journaled for a while. And sometimes when an interesting insight arose, I typed it here in this journal. When I was finished, I had a good feeling, as if I’d gotten some spiritual food.
Now, I’m getting back to planning and working. There’s a negative emotional quality inside of me, and I think that it’s pushing me to take care of things.
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Today (and possibly the next few days):
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There are two aspects to being a person of high-value.
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You shift from focusing on what you can get out of a situation, and now you’re emphasis becomes what you are giving to the situation. You relate to the world as an influencer and a creator. This shift in identity leads to a cascade of other shifts, some obviously related and other subtly related. This is a shift in how you see yourself and in how you relate to others.
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You become familiar with the value of what you are offering, of what you bring to the table. You know that because of who you are and what you bring, others are benefiting from being around you and are fortunate to have you. This is a shift in how you see others.
Notice that nothing in any of that requires that you think less of anyone else.
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Think of how differently interactions and negotiations would go if you knew the value of what you have to offer.
About anything, business, sex, information-exchange, whatever. Imagine that you walked into rooms knowing that you legitimately had treasures in your pocket and in your heart.
Like all evolutionary leaps, it is both a leveling-up and also a kind of a loss. You lose the luxury of being a passive audience member. You lose the special joy of feeling that you ‘lucked out’ and ‘got something for nothing’ You gain the capacity to move in power.
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More Value Thoughts On Tonight’s Hike:
(I tend to start downloading insights when I start walking. This one’s an old insight that got updated.)
A monkey (a cartoon monkey, at least) thinks of value in terms of bananas. A squirrel thinks of value in terms of acorns and a nice tree.
If you give a Mercedes-Benz to a monkey, it might think something like: ‘Ah, great! This is a big box that can store a lot of bananas!’
If it figures out how to work the locks, it may feel even luckier: ‘I can keep my bananas safe from others and I can hide from predators in this thing.’
Those statements are definitely true. But, as modern human beings, we’d agree that the primary value of a Mercedes-Benz is not as a refrigerator or as a very small apartment.
But we also can’t blame the monkey or the squirrel for valuing the Mercedes based on what is important in her world.
In the same way, be careful about how you allow others to establish your value.
Did they see and understand your potential, your talents? Did they appreciate all that you have to offer? And let’s not just blame the world or “Society”. Did you see and understand your potential, your talents, and gifts? Did you appreciate what you have to offer?
If anyone has not seen and understood these things–whether it’s someone else or even whether it’s you yourself–you should not accept that person’s valuation of you. Otherwise, you might be allowing the squirrel to appraise the Mercedes-Benz. Obviously, you’re free to do so, if you wish; but I just think it would be something of a shame.
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I’m two weeks into Dragon Fire (Dragon Reborn Stage 1), but I can already subtly feel some of the benefits associated with Dragon Flight (DR Stage 3). I can only imagine how this will be when I actually get to that point in Dragon Reborn.
I’m able to see more clearly what happened to guide my life and career in the directions that they took, what internal qualities both defined my purpose and also made it difficult for me to bring that purpose together.
It does not look tragic at all. I can see the naturalness of how things came together. Also, I can see what qualities I would have needed to have in greater strength to have had a smoother journey.
Essentially, I had a combination of qualities that required me to live an Independent Studies kind of life. A Choose-Your-Own-Adventure kind of life. But I did not have the external will, social hardiness, and confidence to create that kind of path for myself.
The issue was that there was no real alternate option. ‘Joining Up’ with something in any simplistic or generic way was always going to be a failing option. Yet that was the only option that I felt strong enough or clear enough to manage. Of course, parents, family, surrounding society and environment were also contributing and perpetuating factors. But I’m comfortable seeing all of these as elements of my basic set-up. I don’t mind seeing it as being about me.
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On another note: looks like rest days and periodic washouts are repaying with dividends.
Look for subliminal results and signs of progress in the style of you. Your own mind is going to be what is producing your results.
Sure sometimes your mind will surprise you with some new talent or phenomenon; but much of the time it’s going to get the job done by applying the skills and patterns that it usually applies. If you’re not the kind of person who usually faints into a trance and has visions of Angelic messengers directing you of what to do next, don’t be surprised when that doesn’t happen with subliminals.
Your mind already has excellent ways of integrating experiences and expressing its intentions. Your magickal name for those ways? ‘Life As Usual’.
You may be amazed to find that ‘Life As Usual’ can be pretty damned miraculous and can produce profound transformations in circumstance, given the right resources.
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The 11th House
Interpersonal foundation for the development of ideas and life direction. Not a cult, a connection.