To me, the most ironic part of it all is that the only absolutely vital prerequisite for confidently loving yourself is:
[drum roll]
confidently loving yourself.
Yup, it’s based on nothing but itself.
Rules and Regs
All the rules that we or anyone make up to ‘justify’ it are just that: empty and made-up.
Not to say that they’re useless or invalid or ‘wrong’ per se. But they’re utterly made up.
A bunch of people decide over some years on the rule to how a group of people should bounce a ball and try to throw it into a net.
Because those rules are taken seriously and stick, millions of people are then able to enjoy watching basketball.
The rules are simultaneously 100% made-up and 100% real.
If you go into the game and break the rules you will be booed out the stadium by the millions of people who now support those rules.
So, they’re real.
On the other hand, you can do the leg work and campaign and gather supporters to play a completely different game. It may take time (40 to 100 years), but eventually you may have a completely different game with a different set of rules.
And those new rules?
Also utterly made-up. Also utterly real.
The misunderstanding people have is that Arbitrary somehow equals Easy.
Not at all.
Standing in your chosen version of Arbitrary, Made-up Bullshit may be the hardest skill that there is. That’s why people are constantly seeking external validation and precedents for points and positions that, at the end of the day, we just made up.
“it’s been done this way for 1000 years!”
(yup. and 1000 years ago, people just made it up.)
“science and empirical data support it!”
(yup, and science and data support about 1000 other alternatives, but this is the made-up option that you prefer.)
“Most people are doing it this way.”
(yup, and with enough time and influence, most people will be doing it another way.)
and on and on.
There is no escape from the reality that we are Creators. Influencing and being Influenced.
Might as well strive to get as close as we can to the Zero Point of creation, and try to get more of a handle on it. Until the current churns us up and spits us out again.