Yes, in that post you quoted - I talk about how changing the fundamental lens of how you perceive and express sexuality will automatically make you uninterested in porn.
Healthy intimacy, self-respect, self-worth, agency, etc, further develop those things within yourself, and you’ll naturally perceive sexuality through those lenses, which will push you away from pornography. Strengthening your sense of agency will also help you easily overcome compulsive behaviors like PMO because compulsion requires a gap in agency. And I’m talking about deep subconscious structures related to agency. That way you’ll always be in control and feel in control, and won’t have to rely on willpower, distracting yourself, or whatever superficial method people advocate for you to apply, lol.
These types of things are bulletproof in terms of how they work, because they address the root causes. Root cause philosophy is what actually produces the real results.
I have a friend of a friend who follows some mainstream guy named Chase Hughes, and he told me that my philosophy is the exact same of what that guy talks about. The idea that society hardly moves the needle because they’re obsessed with symptoms instead of root causes.
A great example of this, is the whole “nervous system” trend going on in wellness spaces, where everyone is obsessed with nervous systems.
“I need to heal and strengthen my nervous system”.
“I need to fix my nervous system”.
Notice how it’s focused on as if it’s a biological issue, as if the nervous system is broken or something.
This is because a lot of people in general have overstimulated nervous systems due to living in a constant state of fear, worry, and stress.
The people who are little more experienced, will tell you that nobody has a nervous system issue. Their nervous systems are working 100% perfectly, and healthy.
If you feel powerless, victimized, helpless, and like you have no control, choice, or direction in changing your experience - then your nervous system will get cranked up. The moment you start feeling powerful, in control, aware of your choice, and your ability to respond or create your future - your nervous system will relax. People don’t have a “nervous system” problem, they have an agency problem. And it’s not black and white, it’s on a spectrum. The nervous system is just a responder to your perceptual lenses and sense of agency. Think of your nervous system as a highly sensitive microphone, that adjusts itself in response to what it “hears” about your agency. It doesn’t create anything - it reflects what your perception of agency is broadcasting. If you crank up the volume of choice, power, and control, then the nervous system will lower the volume on fear, reactivity, and uncertainty. Take “doomscrolling” for instance. Doomscrolling is literally the nervous system reacting to a lack of agency. You encounter something outside of your locus of control, the system spikes, and then you compulsively scroll to try to regain a sense of agency. Obviously scrolling isn’t going to provide that, so you just end up with a cranked nervous system, and a state of stress, reactivity, and weaker energy. Social media like IG will literally bombard you with uncertainty (politics, viral drama, other people’s lives and situations) that is outside of your locus of control, in an artificially hyper-concentrated manner that humans aren’t really evolved to handle - which keeps people in a fight or flight state, constantly weak, highly suggestible, reactive, and at each other’s necks. That also disrupts physical health because your body shuts off, delays, and suppresses natural healing and regenerative processes while prioritizing survival.
Even if your addiction is a coping mechanism for emotional processing - it’s really the agency that keeps your system calm, and gives you choice on how to respond to an emotion. If you don’t have that stabilized feeling and awareness of being in control, then it becomes much easier to reactively cope with a “negative” emotion like fear, anger, or sadness through avoidance or numbing. If your agency is strong enough, you don’t even need to do “detachment” or “observer mode” in emotional processing, you can stay fully present with your emotions, feel them, and integrate them without being thrown off. You don’t even need to “regulate your nervous system” with a strong enough agency, as it will just happen automatically.
If you have a cranked nervous system and only rely on relaxation techniques, breathwork, etc, you’re not actually changing anything on a deeper level - you’re just managing symptoms. Instead of upgrading the root cause, you’re just “de-stressing” the system until the same interpretation of reality reactivates that stress. You don’t heal stress by calming your system, you heal it by actually changing the perceptual lens that keeps creating it. And most of that lens is related to agency.
