I personally love this approach. Having one sub that you stick with that gets to know you personally, while the rest act as āsupportā. Whatever your long-term goal is, I think that should be your main sub that you donāt switch, at least until you think youāve made significant progress towards that goal. It makes sticking out the recon a lot better if youāre able to look at the copy and literally see your goals embodied in the objectives.
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Thank you 
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Also, totally unrelated, average journal entry
So I came upon that thread that talk about the biofield after discussing with you about biofields and especially that post from saints,
I can attest that I went slightly mad after a chance encounter with archangels, digging a bit, and having a huge spiritual experience that left me very luminous (according to people who know me), very sensitive to energy (biofield) and very energetic, as attested by a reishi practitioner and other spiritual workers (psychopump and the such)
I wasnāt ready.
And though I got lots of results and synchronicities, like taking an hitchhiker who was a spiritual writer that came to my region from another country to die here to realise a prophecy he saw in a dream.
It did leave me mad and in acute spiritual psychosis for nearly a year. (On top of feeling like I had a dagger digging into my brain from my nape the few days or so following the initial big spiritual experience
Like, before that I have been an engineer in STEM with next to no experience with āthe occultā or spirituality.
And I have been quite far from being pure or taking care of my bodyā¦
I didnāt even know about biophoton or biofields at the time so I had no way of integrating what was happening / what had happened.
The only spiritual things I knew was that there were religions and that I didnāt believe them. (Was an atheist)
Well, to be exact I didnāt go mad directly, it was when I started digging further, against the advice from the archangel I knew, into all that crazy stuff Saint mentions :
Like, yeah that was a big mistake.
I could explain it away like āoh silly me, I couldnāt figure out what exactly happened to me, what was good for me and what wasnāt at the timeā but I was directly warned to stop digging into stuff that donāt concern me.
But I did, and went mad, and now that Iām more based on the practical application of old traditions mixed with newer scientific understandings, Iām getting better.
Well, though I am religious now lmaoo
And well, this is in part why Iām attracted to subliminals.
I got a similar sensation and results when running the subliminals as to afterwards (though to a much lesser degree and without the fear of possibly being erased from all planes of existence, including from the memory of everyone I ever met, lol),
And the effects seem to be of a similar nature feeling and effect wise as to what I got from the archangel blessing/spell (casted without words in a language I donāt understand, possibly using biofield information or direct communication with the subconscious?)
Though, here with them I can integrate what kind of technology they are without just brushing it off with āmagicā, though I donāt get the exact working mechanics (donātneed to for it to work), I can figure how it influe on the body and mind globally and make sense of it.
This is also why eventually I would like to run Khan Black and Alchemist, but yeah with what Saint said, I should probably do Emperor Fitness first for training the body as well (or just, find a good qigong trainer and seriously start practicing it as part of my lifestyle, maybe alongside calisthenics and/or yoga)
But yeah, basics first. I wonāt do the same mistake again of trying to go too far too fast.
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Thatās quite a journey, Iām glad youāve found something that works without the worrying about getting erased from existence part. From what Iāve read of the thread, KB is definitely worth the full run at some point. Looks pretty fun too.
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So, a follow up to that story,
Yesterday I didnāt meet up with Cin and Ju, in the end as it wasnāt clear in my mind how I could concile all parties.
In the end, things resolved really well on their own, as things tend to do.
She had a feeling these last couple weeks that he had been seeing other girls, notably going to at the house of a long time friend of his who took her distances at the beginning of his relationship with Cin because she realised she like Ju.
Last night, after she went back to his place Ju told her that heād rather be friend with benefits or an open relationship of sorts, well though she was quite a bit dismayed at the news last night, sheās come to be ok with it in the end, she called me this morning,
things went a bit like this (with some bits ommited for length):
Me: Hey, how are you doing?
C: Iām ok, much better, there were misunderstandings last night but itās fine now.
Me: Good!
C: You know how I told you I felt something was going on
Me: How you felt like heās seeing other girls?
C: Yeah, so he went to repair stuff at Aās house, sheās a kind of old time friend who has a crush on Ju and took her distances
Me: Oh yeah, you mentioned her before
C: Coming to the place of someone who has a crush on youā¦
Me: You always had a good intuition.
C: So, in the end heād much rather we stay friends and we could always spend the night from time to time
Me: mmhmm friends with benefits, like us
C: Or heād be fine with an open relationship of sorts, where we see other people
Me: Oh, like we could the two of us?
C: Though weāre not in a relationship, being friends and seeing each other from time to time is fine
Me: Of course
C: It wonāt change much though, since we where only seeing each others once every two weeks.
Me: Yeah, as long as youāre fine thatās what counts
C: We could even do it together
Me: Of course 
so we could see each other this week end?
C: yeah of course thatād be great! Weāll stay in contact before then
Me: No issues ^^ have a god day, kisses
C: I love you
Me: Me too 
So yeah, it looks like I could even possibly manage a threesome with Cin and Ju if I get along even better with Ju, and if heās ok with that sort of thing, I think it could be fun for all parties ^^
I should call him.
Otherwise I could also just do it Cin and I, but it feels like itād be less fun than Ju, Cin and I.
Being poly and bi, I like getting to know metamours
Also, I have been quite tired these last few days, and havenāt been able to finish painting the christmas gifts even while borrowing from my sleep time, I feel lethargic a bit.
This might be due to both the high processing in the background, the high demands of family meetings, as well as sleep debt.
Iāll have to take care of myself in the next couple days.
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I had an awesome very loving holiday with all of my family, it was awesome <3 really good 
I am blessed to be surrounded by love and care like that
I wish all of you a very merry christmas, may all your dreams come true
Mine do !
5 days of washout so far, and I feel great
this is awesome
I am love
I am gratitude
and very grateful to have found that thread: The Complete Guide to Manifesting What You Want
It felt awesome doing affirmations in front of the mirror this morning right after waking up
I was used to singing along affirmation songs in the morning, but never in fron of the mirror, looking myself in the eyes, affirming all the love and care that come from my heart.
so yeah, thank you
Life is Love
Edit:
Also, I finally gave my number to the bakery lady 
A gift from Santa,
a āVoucher for 1 coffeeā with a drawing of a coffee
and my number āto plan the dateā
Edit:
Also, I had a money issue where I didnāt know how I would pay for the formation I wanted to do and signed up for, that would allow me to access a government program that would help make me opening a business possible.
This was solved as well through my mom unexpectedly wiring me the funds, even though I didnāt ask that of her. (or any money for that matter)
So thatās awesome as well! My story is unfolding little by little in great and unexpected ways 
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Also expanding some more on the details here.
If we take that view of us as an aggregate of particles with energy running through us in patterns (the energy running being the āconsciousā and the patterns engrammed from that energy movement being the āsubconsciousā)
We can remember that āmemoriesā are also patterns of brain activity, and so are part of the subconscious and influence our conscious thoughts and actions
though, much like how the pattern that make the subconscious may be changed, so can the memories and especially their impact on the conscious (conscious influence on the memory pattern)
and similarly, in the universe, archetypes and other egregores and ideas are running through the ācollective subconsciousā, which is the ensemble of all pattern of collective interactions āenergy exchangeā engrammed onto all that makes āthe universeā.
Thatās what makes sense to me when I think of āangelsā, ādemonsā, ādragonsā, āgodsā, and others.
Patterns within the local universe that influence interactions and greater movements of ideas and actions.
Hence why, in my view, when someone is āpossessed by the Spiritā in the biblical sense, that Spirit is an āangelic archetypeā pattern on the collective subconscious influencing the individualās conscious such that this personās speech follow an universe pattern, becoming a āthought of the worldā.
And so, these patterns and archetypes also evolve and are either reinforced through the participation, ābeliefā, āfaithā, āthoughtsā, āideasā, and imagination of each entities that interact with the world, or weakened through being ignored and forgotten.
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So, follow up on that.
Apparently I āmisunderstoodā and they broke up but they are super close and call each others and she love him but canāt pardon him yet they have been super close calling each others and stuff.
Still, itās been like three days she said sheāll spend time (and the night) with me and found reasons to report, apparently weāll spend the evening tomorrow āfor sureā
Though I have a feeling itāll be the same stuff as the two other times that I almost slept with her, that sheāll find someone while at the club and ask me if he can come to my place so she can fuck him instead while I get to hear everything from the other room.
So thatās decided, if that happens, if she asks, sheāll have a choice:
- Either he come back with us and we both take her
- Or she say sorry to the guy, share numbers for later, and come back with me alone
- Or I leave and they do it wherever they want but not at my place.
Iām done putting myself second or third.
Iām done with disrespect.
She disrespected me a lot in the past two years. like, really a lot.
and afterward Iāll prob take my distances from her, for my own sanity.
Edit for clarity:
and I donāt mean ādisrespectā in the dudebro sense of the term,
I mean like sleep with a guy she knew from the day of in front of me, three days after I told her I loved her and she jumped from joy at the news.
I mean like me getting an arrest report from saving her life, only to have her sell the two consoles I lent her (worth 2k+) for 100e a few month later after I blocked her for a day.
Thatās what I mean by disrespect.
Edit 2:
Canāt tell yāall how many times I listened to Game Over By Maitre Gims feat Vitaa while thinking of her, Iāll def send her that at some point especially from 1:41 to 2:09, it fits so damn well, but yeah, the whole song.
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Thinking about it, I might just break my 15 days fast washout now at on the 6th day to run a quick loop of primal night a few hours prior, just for fun
Afterward Iāll continue washout of course ^^
Done 3 minutes, weāll see how all goes down.
I should tame my expectations though, too much expectations lead to suffering
Edit:
I was right to lessen my expectations.
After all that she said in the last couple days, after all she is still with him and I was right in the first place.
Nothing happened, she thought I was horny which I very well might have been with 3 minutes of primal nights lmaoo but well I slighlty dodged the question as āI was talking about food!ā Or āI was talking about an escape game, what did you think?ā And other funzies.
Though she did say that sheāll talk with J if itās possible to have a threesome or even a trouple, all three of us, so thatās a good path forward at least ^^
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Ok so today I went with her, so during the day she start complaining about how she feels her BF is cheating on her (well, her bf, but theyāre no longer together, but theyāre together and she donāt want him to be with someone else despite him breqking with herā¦)
and giving me a ton of reasons as to why.
So ok I validate her feelings and tell her she should do what she wants.
She call him, tell me he told her heās at āinsert far away cityā to see his kid, I say ok, she claim itās weird and send texts to a friend of his that mentioning it, and tag him in a publication where they kiss. While making a story with me.
And then some time afterwards she start to claim heās not at āinsert cityā and I lied and was the one who told her and made them fight??
So I point out āI donāt quite remember if I was the one to call, but whether or nor it was me, how would I possibly know about this city being important to him amongst any other city?ā
And then she start to blame me for hitting on her yesterday ???
Even though she was very open to the idea?
While we where at the house of the brother of a friend in common?
Hell nah
So well, I kinda unloaded a bit about her not being there for court and selling 2k of console for 100 bucks,
She tell me the consoles are still at her place and again that I was hitting on her and called her āāāexā"" the morning after they āāābroke upā""
I was pulled apart by another guest who told me kindly I should drop it and leave, I agreed, said sorry for letting my emotions get the better of me, and thank you for taking me out on the balcony for fresh air, and started to leave.
The host told me to stay, so I meditated a bit on the balcony.
She went trying to say sorry, then the host came and told me I shouldnāt stay alone.
she tried to pull her bs again so I asked
Me: What did I bring you these last two years?
Her: joy and happiness
Me: and what did you bring me?
Her: joy and happiness
Me: and a court case.
Her: what? So thatās how you see it? Blah blah blah
So I asked her āwhere were you during court?ā
Well, she wasnāt there.
Although I went to court for saving her life.
Although she broke or sold 2k worth of consoles and games afterwards (although she now claims to still have them)
You know what, I have enough.
She can handle her bs alone.
Good luck with her in that life, if sheās gonna try to use the ābut you hit on me!ā Card every time thereās a disagreement while there are videos running around of her in gang bangs with people she barely knows, like, I donāt need that ki.d of problems in life you know?
She tries to say sorry even though she claimed all these things like I manipulate everyone into her sending certain texts and other people responding a certain way.
Duuude, I barely control myself how am I gonna control other people?
Madness.
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Do you think that she may be projecting some of her insecurities/negative traits onto you, and thatās why she may act so inconsistently with you compared to others? I 100% agree with you putting your foot down and distancing yourself, Iām just trying to make sense of why almost every time you bring her up, she reverts to some childish behavior or blame game that shows she hasnāt really matured past that age.
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I know that
I also know, now with some time, that I canāt get her to evolve past that if sheās not willing to.
Iāve tried for two years.
Itās just, I have to think about me as well, I canāt keep being stuck in the same place waiting for her to get out of the same patterns she complains about.
I told her all I could. All the wisdom I could muster to get her to stop getting into the same self destructive patterns.
And all I get is to see her destroy herself again and again.
So yeah, nah.
I went beyond because it felt like I knew her for centuries from the very first day I met her (and it may very well be so with past lives) and because she was/is interesting and got me to meet a ton of people for better and for worse, but I donāt wanna play that game no more. Enough is enough, I gotta take care of myself too.
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Her having caused this court thing too could almost be like a direct message of that too
Itās not her who caused that.
Itās me, by getting in between the guy who wanted to slaughter her and herself.
(because she kissed a girl in front of him, him being homophobic and jealous because she got him to buy her a ton of dtuff and give her a ton of money, using the fact he love her, without her giving anything back.)
I got myself in that situation by defending her, no, I only blame her for abandoning me afterwards.
Like, not even blaming her much, I can understand thatās a bother, but maaan I would have liked some support.
My lawyer whom I pay a fortune because heās the dean of the university of law gave my case to a newbie and I basically had to defend the case myself.
Still do now that I appealed.
Basically alone in front of the judge and jury and prosecutor and attorney.
This is also why I look ahead for subs, I gotta really up my game if I want to do the job that I pay my lawyer to do and not have to sell my home or car to pay for the aggressorās / wannabe murderer medical fees.
Have you looked into this?
https://q.subliminalclub.com/product/key-of-the-courts/
Customs can be expensive but maybe including it as the additional module of a name embed might help.
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Thanks for the recommendation 
I think the only major title in which Iād include it would be Raikov, since I intented to use Raikov as the main vector to accelerate learning starting march 30th
Though yeah, itād be the price of a multistage, and itās not much the price the issue but rather my own questioning on if it wonāt be too focused on that? I mean not that itās a bad thing or anything, but I intent to use Raikov long term and not just for this instance, and aside from that I never had legal issues before.
Iāll have to think on it more, I have some times before that.
Also, even if Iāll have to sell my apartment or car Iāll find a way, maybe itāll be the beginning of the #vanlife I fantasized about? lol
Especially since dreams and fantasies do tend to come trueā¦
Edit:
Though when I say ā#vanlife I fantasized aboutā I donāt just mean like I dreamt of sleeping in a van.
I envisioned it more like a combination, meeting new people and learning skills by Wwoofing (aka, working in farms or doing small tasks for food and lodging), trading and investing with the excess money from selling my place, doing small jobs here and there using my diverse skills, using free time to write the books I have in mind, and to appreciate and commune with nature, as well as doing volunteer tech work for the open source community and associations, as well as helping people get out of the Big Techās overreach. These are things that get me excited.
Of course, these are still fantasies, as I have a cushy job with an apartment, stuff like that.
People counting on me, I have to be responsible, things like that
Edit 2:
Even though how I could learn some more of Quantum Physics than I already know, become a quantum programmer, (as it will become shortly in the next 10 to 20 years the next big thing with Quantum Computing becoming more advanced and Quantum AI that will develop)
maybe even use quantum computing for market prediction
After all, whatās the best way to influe on a second order chaotic system (aka, chaos that respond to prediction) if not using non-causal computing? (aka, using the non-linearity of time to predict)
Edit 3: make modeling gigs, be an extra in commercials, go on tv shows, possibilities are endless
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Lowkey just taking a step back to see the order in everything. āSpring. Summer. Autumn. Winter.ā like Saint and Fire touch on in their writing stuff. Stuff like Revelation of Wealth, not even to make money but just to understand the flow of things. Although that might be just me since my background doesnāt see quantum physics or computing in the best light. Not having to rely on an unpredictable system feels better.
If itās something you looked forward to then it really might just be a blessing in disguise urging you towards it
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Having worked with programming, notably involving nuclear and high energy physics systems, I can absolutely understand that.
Scientists working at Iter, (and am assuming similarly for other similar places) arenāt the funniest, nor the most open minded surprisingly.
To me, Quantum Physics is closer to nature than classic computing.
While classic computing is deterministics ones and zeroes, often nature and life tend to be less so and more fluid.
QP thus get closer to it, as it is probabilistic and closer to the actual systems.
Though it canāt do everything, as we bent society over to be deterministic black-and-white, but it is good for predicting issues closer to nature, like weather, particles computation, proteing folding, financial markets, and other chaotic systems (chaotic meaning, hard to predict because just changing a tiny thing give a totally different result)
And yeah, as you said, it may be a blessing in disguise ^^
Anyway, I choose to trust life, and am sure that as long as I donāt give up on it and keep living as much as possible, it wonāt give up on me and will let me live as much as possible.
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Can you send me a resource about the protein folding? I know of really good ML/NN methods but havenāt heard of QP being used to tackle it. (this is very much me just nerding out)
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This is not my field but I saw news in one of the vulgarisation magazine Iām subscribed to,
I found this article on the subject, where they solved complex protein folding problems faster than with classic computing, apparently the team got a new optimisation method that helped them find stable energy states ^^ Researchers Use Trapped-Ion Quantum Computer to Tackle Tricky Protein Folding Problems
Thereās also this older article in nature where they explain how quantum computing was less energy intensive than classic computing Resource-efficient quantum algorithm for protein folding | npj Quantum Information
Though of course, this article being 4 years old there was less qbit, less error correction, and less stability than we have now, thereās a race to quantum computing going on currently, well a race toward disruptive tech/ deep tech in general, we live in interesting times ^^
Quantum specialty seem to be NP problems, because while with classic computing gotta try solution one at a time (or more with multithreading, but weāre limited by the amount of cores, hence why we use GPUs who got way more cores than CPUs), quantum computing, from my understanding, try every possible solutions at once.
Talking about that, doesnāt it seem like Quantum computing could be good for solving blockchain transactions? Iām gonna search
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