What are you running now?
@pacman Today and tomorrow are rest day for me but I am running QLQ and AscensionQ. I also have in program to add Rebirth to help me with old emotional traumas but I don’t know if it’s better using the Q version or the Ultima.
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QL Q - 1st Rest Day
AscensionQ - 1st Rest Day
Another realization I made today, staying with people (and this is very important) is:
I have too much of a good boy/buddy attitude. I have nothing sexual when it comes to girls (I’ve noticed this a lot today) and I’m not women’s first choice. At least that’s what I felt.
One of the girls I like, yesterday, when she saw me “depressed” (and boy if you could see that I was) said to me “what do you have? You know you can talk to me and tell me everything. You’re like a big brother to me” ( She broke my heart with this word). But then today when she was with her “boyfriend” (attracted to each other thanks to the power of alcohol) she kept looking at me from afar, and every time I turned around she was there looking at me and hinting at me a smile. I’m confused…
On the level of “dominance” I think it’s going the right way. I take my space. I like to be followed instead of being the pursuer. I have my say when I want, caring little about hurting others. I can keep up a group conversation (especially when I’m drinking. The dominant part is as if it comes out, as if my subconscious takes over. Is that you Ascension?).
Today I managed to get invited for New Year’s Eve to a party by a guy I don’t even know😂 for this ability of being able to talk to others. It’s a good thing.
In summary. The “respect for men” part I think is building well in me, I am missing the “seducer of women” part because if they continue to see me as a friend / brother or non-sexual man I will never go on.
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So you basically a “incel in denial”, cuck if you still hope that woman who see you as a brother will get freaky with you. Remember all woman are freaks but not to anyone, if you fail to resurface the freakish attitude deep inside her, she already sees you as incompetent and will never open her floodgates for you under no circumstances.
Do not misunderstand. I’m not hoping for anything I just wrote what I observed.
“Incel” means involuntary celib right? Bad word. I’m only a man that have some difficulty with young ladies although I know the dynamics.
In the past despite my social/emotional weakness I had some girl (good too. On a personal and aesthetic level if I really have to dwell on this point) without knowing how I did it.
But now it’s all complicated for me. I can no longer do anything with women (who knows why?). For this I started a sub like Ascension, so that it can give me more control in this aspect of my life. And as I said the social part and the respect of other men is basically managed, it is with girls that it is a trauma thing.
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I was reading this interesting topic about nice guys on the forum and I caught this post that I wanted to quote.
It reminds me a lot of myself of the part that says Nice Guy Syndrome can be associated with a distorted bond with parents. Well I have always had an emotionally distant relationship with my father and although I have improved over time growing up I still feel that little “brake” on him. He was always a good father and yet I feel that.
Maybe I’m finding one of the main causes of my problem (especially with women).
It is then recommended to use Ascension (which I am already doing. In Q version) and Regeneration (in my previous posts I wrote that I was considering to insert Rebirth Q / ultima in my stack)
What do you tell me? Better to add Rebirth or Regeneration?
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Rebirth Ultima will be easier to run, but might not cause the deep change you want. It WILL help you burrow through some of the reconciliation and issues that arise. Regeneration will be harder to run, but causes deeper change.
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Very well. So I guess I will insert a RegenerationQ loop between QL and Ascension.
There are some profound changes to be made and the difficulty or heaviness of the sub is a price I accept to bear.
Thank you @SaintSovereign
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Incel means unattractive you know, what is your excuse? this guy literally wrote in his tinder bio that he is a child rapist and woman still want to be with him.
Maybe the problem is not your trauma towards woman.
He is a good looking guy. That help him a lot. Look at how much text he have to write. Is the girl that is doing the work, that is reacting more to him, that trying to seduce him.
Also the problem with law is associated with bad boy behaviors and women love it. Women are not logical. A lot of them doesn’t even care if you’re a killer. Ever heard of criminals with lovers?
However the good look is not the point of the thing.
You ask me which is my excuse. I’ve never talked about excuses, at least on a conscious level.
Only thing I can say is that my problem is more behavioral
I’m trying to find out.
QL Q - 2nd Rest Day of the week
AscensionQ - 2nd Rest Day of the week
What I want to write today is just one thing I have noticed over time while listening to subs since the time of Khan (when I ran it) until today that I am listening to Ascension + QL.
The thing I noticed is my handwriting. This last has changed a lot from before. The changes I see the most is an extreme order and organization of writing, compared to before I was writing in a completely messy way. One other thing I noticed is the body of the writing: much straighter and more uniform than the slanted and uneven way of the past. Above all, now I write in a very pressed way while before I wrote in a delicate way.
I make all these clarifications because the science (if it can be defined as a that) of graphology describes every structure of writing by associating it with behavioral and subconscious traits. Seeing my writing changed tells me that something has changed compared to the past many days and I have also consciously noticed this.
I still have a few things to change / improve, but so far the change in my writing shows me some variations within me.
For example: my writing which is now straighter means self-confidence and self-control (I confirm). The fact that I press more on the sheet indicates an increase in my motivation and energy to do things (I confirm).
Just nice QL is rely nice, like to hear this since i sould also like to improve my handwriting also
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I don’t know if it is a direct consequence of QL or a change caused by the evolution of my subconscious but this change is there.
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Your on stage one right, it has healing when it comes to your brain so thing you already know are probably getting improve but maybe it the evolution of your usage lol
Yeah good point. It may be as you say
I’m noticing a very important thing about AscensionQ. The sub is trying to get me to notice my Nice Guy behaviors more and more and is fueling the desire to destroy them.
I started reading No More Mister Nice Guy having caught it in a forum post by sheer chance (but I don’t think that’s the case, it’s Ascension at work). I’ve noticed that I have some of these Nice Guy behaviors, a few, but I don’t like them. In the past when I was a teenager I was much worse but now I have improved a lot and I am much freer in my expressiveness and I want to improve further.
It’s time to destroy all weakness.
It’s time to fight.
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QL Q - Day 21 (2 loops)
RegenerationQ - Day 1 (2 loops)
AscensionQ - Day 16 (2 loops)
I added today RegenerationQ to my stack. Just now when I am writing I am listening to the first loop and I am experiencing that sense of euphoria that is spoken of when your subconscious likes what it is listening to. My subconscious like the script.
Edit:
Regarding QL. I notice that the motivation for studying has increased. Now I can study for much longer without getting tired. I am more motivated.
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Thank you @Apollo you are really made the thing crystal clear.
Yes we are in the Fight Club. Cool way to see it.
We are here to empower ourselfs and as you do I am feeling more powerful and healtier everyday that passes. I learned a lot of things on myself too that I was never considerated.
I know I had a lot of frustration and weak moment but I am feeling better than before. Sometimes is like magic, but don’t get me wrong the real magic ingredient is action!
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Yeah that the spirit, we all improving brick by brick. Subliminal help us to change what we need the extra help with in owe life
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today I noticed another thing that has been happening to me for a couple of days.
I can say that I love video games and I love to play, but lately I am losing the desire to do it and I almost feel like it is a waste of time. I find myself much more focused on the things I have to do (particularly studying).
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