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OK, Monday I get back to the gym. I’ve selected a program, or at least I’m going to do their seven day free trial.
It’s a fitness program with online coaching run by a bunch of ex SEALS and such which provides the type of functional strength and fitness that I’m going to need to get into the field I want to be in. Plus, there’s a big emphasis on injury healing and prevention. Those guys all come out busted up, so they know. I’m getting older, so that part will be good. -
Maybe I should do up a Primal LOTS custom for this. It keeps me at two programs and I’ll look good by summer.
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I’m running Primal - Spartan - LotS. Started on Monday for the new year. I like it so far. Plan to run 45 days as a prelude to PS. May run 2 cycles of Primal.
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I’ve been feeling really good these last few days. My level of felt stress is much lower even though the things I was stressed about haven’t changed much. I’m feeling very optimistic about life looking much better a few months from now and better still on 12/24/24 which is the goal.
I’m not focusing on the problems like they were the sword of Damocles anymore. I’m still aware of them, and I’m aware that the steps I’m taking now will help lead to a solution even where there isn’t a direct obvious connection at the moment. My subconscious has got this, I just have to let it work and keep doing my part day by day. -
I am going to add Primal in tonight. My reasoning is this. I’ve been focused on improving my life for a very long time, but I have done so so completely that I haven’t had much attention for living it.
From the description and what people are saying about the new Primal, it’s about just that. Living life and enjoying it in the now.
Goals are great, but there’s always a new one when they’re completed. If I’m not enjoying the journey to them at all, what’s the point?
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I just completed a six minute loop of DE2 and a five minute loop of Primal.
I felt a little bit of pressure in my head towards the end of my primal loop, and maybe a little bit out of it and a slight headache now. Nothing I can’t handle.
I’m very curious to see how this one affects me, and how these two programs interact. -
What am I hoping for from Primal? Among other things to make me less inhibited. One of my major problems I’ve had getting to where I want to be in life has come from me being very inhibited and risk averse.
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- I’m getting a little anger recon a few hours after my loops. Nothing too bad and we’ll see how I feel when I wake up.
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I’ve had that overload recon when I stack loops back to back, even with 5 minute loops.
For months I’ve been playing one in the morning, then another in the afternoon or evening. I’ve not felt that overload, and my day isn’t off due to “too much”.
But the New Primal hit me too when I first ran it.
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I felt like hand hammered horse shit when I woke up this afternoon. Just mentally exhausted and out of sorts.
I’m feeling better now, but the stress about financial matters that had been pretty much banished is trying to creep back in along with negative visualizations and all of that fun stuff.
I don’t know if adding Primal was a good idea.
I’ll give it another run tomorrow, but if this trend continues, I think I’ll add RICH back in, or do DE2 solo for the foreseeable future. -
I have noticed a pattern here. Any sub that tries to make me more social seems to cause me serious recon. And frankly I don’t think I can say that any social or sexual sub has ever worked for me. I might be overstating the case there, and also not giving myself enough credit in that as things stand now I don’t have enough exposure to social situations for any social or seduction sub to have a chance to show results.
I was hoping that Primal would actually enhance the results of Emperor, and maybe it still will. -
This may be a sign that I shouldn’t be trying to do too many things at once. My goal for the year was to get life under control and maybe I should be sticking to that. If so, then after I’ve achieved that sufficiently, I can spend some time focused on the social and sexual stuff.
Stupid responsibility. -
On the good side, I woke up to a money manifestation this morning. I am currently working an extra twelve hour shift.
That has historically been the first way that RICH starts working when I start running it, so I’m getting some momentum there.
I’m grateful for that.
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I may try that. These new uns are no joke.
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Having thought about it, I’m at least going to try keeping Primal in my stack.
The type of masculinity that the sales copy describes is definitely something I want in the “new me” that I’m trying to form this year, and I’ve had first loop recon before and gotten through it.
I can see not running PS for the time being since the lack of contact with women would not allow much in the way of execution and that would likely be recon city.
Primal however is about much more than seduction. I want the fun in my life. I want the relaxed IDGAF attitude, I want the badassness.
Those things have been missing from my makeup since I was a kid.
That might be why this and Khan cause me recon. It’s just very difficult for my subconscious to see myself that way. -
I finished listening to One Small Step Can Change Your Life. I’ll decide what my next self improvement listen is on Monday.
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I love that fuckin book
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There were a lot of good ideas in there.
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I thought of this post by Saint days ago when you were antsy to see results. These truths relax my impatience.
When I ran New Emperor last cycle, it’d stir me up and irritate me, and I could only look and wait for some epiphany. Since I’ve been on Phoenix heavily since then, it was obvious to me that I’d been used to “thinking” about my problems–so I rarely changed anything.
And Phoenix is tossing this norm up in the air, completely disrupting all my “safe” ways to avoid changing.
There’s both beauty and pain in this crossover. I’m freeing myself from very closed-off mindsets, yet I’m frequently seeking those old mindsets for safety. We know what we know. Until something changes.
Yeah, Phoenix is burning up old ways daily. I’m on day 2 of washout, and it seems like I only listened 12 hours ago. It’s that active.
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I saw that one too. I’m definitely seeing results from Emperor, and I can’t say Primal isn’t doing anything because it kicked my ass yesterday.
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- I just got a call from my Dad. He says that there is a very strong possibility that he is dying in the very near future.
I don’t know how to react to that. At the moment I’m just thinking, ok, 2024 is the year I have to face things. All right, let’s go.
Emperor.
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**1/8/24 CYCLE 1 WEEK 3**
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I did my first GBRS group workout this afternoon. It wasn’t too bad.
This is definitely a program for go muscle rather than show muscle. There are a lot of weird mobility movements to start with. I have to say that my hips and lower back feel a lot better than they have in a long time.
There are also a lot of things like heavy kettle bell swings.
I’m liking it so far and though I feel like I’m going to wake up sore tomorrow, I think I can hit it hard five days a week and keep pushing myself hard enough that I’ll see a huge result both in performance and looks a year from now. -
I ran DE2 for six minutes and Primal for five again last night. I woke up feeling fine. There was no sub hangover or exhaustion this time.
I don’t know that I’m noticing anything from Primal at this point.
Actually maybe I am. Maybe.
There were a number of attractive women in the gym. I didn’t stare, but I looked at them.
The thing that might or might not be different is that I wasn’t at all worried about getting caught looking. I just plain didn’t care one way or the other.
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- I’ve been thinking about it, and the fact that I’m on a workout program now fits into that “Focus on what you have direct control over, gain momentum, upward spiral” thing that popped into my head when I first started DE2.
Achieving a higher level of fitness is really likely to help me with all of the other goals that I have.
It’ll make me look better, and more importantly feel better about how I look.
That’ll help with getting women, but that’s just the beginning of it. It might very well help me professionally as well.
The increased performance ability may be necessary for getting one of the jobs that I want.
It’s also an important thing in that Ive said that I’m going to take this action. I have the opportunity to prove to myself that I’ve gained the follow through that I’ve in large part lacked throughout my life.
That’s been a serious self imposed barrier to achieving the things I want and living the life I want to throughout my life.
Now I’m putting a crack in that wall.
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This morning I woke up to my alarm, did my reading and got ready for the gym.
Unfortunately, the wife’s doctors appointment went long, so I had to pick the kid up.
Guess what? I went to the gym anyway. Got my full workout in, and was just an hour or so late getting home. -
I’ve been being a lot more active looking at various sites for another job. I applied for a couple on Friday that were in my field, and either paid better or looked like they might.
I got a call back on one of them today.
At the end of the conversation, I asked the lady what the pay rate was.
I know that that’s not generally considered a good idea at that stage of the game, but in my case, I have an extremely impressive resume for my field, and I’m not going to waste my time and a recruiter’s if they aren’t going to pay me enough.
It turns out that it was considerably less than I make now so I politely said I wasn’t interested.
You know what? That actually felt great.
I am established enough in my field that I can tell a potential employer no, and can tell them what I’m worth. Not because I’m entitled, but because I’ve earned it.
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I ran seven minutes of DE2 tonight, but I kept Primal to five. I think I’m going to hold it there at least for this week.
I get a bit more of a, call it pressure feeling from Primal while I’m running it, so the material is obviously more difficult for my subconscious to wrap itself around than DE2. That’s OK, I have all the time in the world for it to work on it. -
I may have seen a small result from Primal though.
There is a new girl at the counter at the gym. She’s a bit fluffy (in a good way) and nerdy cute which is a preference of mine.
She was definitely making a different kind of eye contact with me when I came in, and obviously made a point to come out and say bye when I left. I’d have waved that away before, but I sense something there. -
I’m amazed at the discipline and habit forming aspects of the new Emperor. Working out daily feels like it’s just what I do even though I’ve only been doing it for two days. So does reaching for a self improvement book instead of my phone first thing when I wake up.
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- I woke up feeling like I’d been beaten with a bag of doorknobs this afternoon.
The two workouts that I’ve done this week really took their toll.
Not long ago I’d have taken that as an excuse to skip today.
I didn’t even think of it. I dragged my sore ass into the gym and crushed it.
I also did my reading first thing, and did a small Kaizen step to organize the place as well.
This run is going REALLY well.
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- I noticed that I can actually see physical changes already when I looked in the mirror this afternoon. My biceps look bigger and more defined. I just look generally better too.
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