No. I love the roommate to death, but she made a pretty determined try at me twenty years ago before I got with the wife and I turned her down. The years have not been kind to her since then.
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I got approved for the vehicle, but the payment that we were going to be charged wasn’t doable. My credit has taken a few dings during the trouble.
I’m disappointed, but we’ll get there in the near future.
I did get some good info from the sales guy about how loans work, and how much of a down payment translates to how much off of the payment.
I’m also motivated to do what I can to improve my credit as quickly as possible. -
PS has been doing something to me, but it’s hard to put my finger on. Ever since I switched to my ZP stack the wife has been drooling over me like, 24/7, but this makes it more so.
I’m being even more unabashedly sexual with her during the course of the day. I find that if I get her really revved up before I go to work, it means that I’m definitely going to get some the next morning after she’s taken the kid to school.
I did that this evening.
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- Look out boys. The wife is going to be starting Seductress on Saturday.
She’s very eager to get going with this. I’m not sure what I’m expecting from that, but it’ll be interesting.
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- Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about how far I’ve come since I started subs and even more so since I started actively trying to improve myself.
I am not the same person as the nervous wreck of a twenty something that I used to be.
Life is looking more and more like I want it to, and I actually think that it will come to look even more so as time goes by.
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- A note about Libertine from the effected perspective. My wife has gained some weight in the nineteen years we’ve been together. Particularly around the middle. Especially in the last few years when her disease has prevented her from getting much exercise of any kind. At one point I was starting to find it to be a problem with being attracted to her, but lately I haven’t cared as much.
The thing I hadn’t realized until now is that since she’s been running Libertine I flat out haven’t even noticed her expanded midsection except when she refers to it. It’s like it isn’t there.
She said that she is really not self conscious about it anymore. That might have something to do with it. This thing definitely hides your flaws from the consciousness of others though.
Truth be told my attention has been focused just a bit higher.
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**2/20/22 CYCLE 3 WEEK 2 STACK A**
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The wife ran her first loop of Seductress last night, and she has been very blatantly flirtatious all day even though we aren’t going to be doing anything for a couple more days.
Flirtatious is maybe too weak a word, but I try not to get this journal an R rating. -
No real chance to test PS this weekend, I didn’t get out, but that’s kind of a long term plan anyway.
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The wife checked her disability status online and it had changed. Something about the local office reviewing her “non medical eligibility”. We know that she had the employment requirements blown away. We think that this means that the admin law judge has decided that she is medically disabled and we should hear good news shortly.
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The wife had a very strange dream the night after running her first loop of Seductress.
She was two characters in this small town in the middle of nowhere. A young woman and one her own age.
They were both involved in setting up a wedding for some of the young people in town, but the older woman knew that there would be no food for the wedding.
Long and short, some of the elderly people sacrificed themselves to BE the food for the wedding. When caught by the middle aged people they insisted on doing it to give the young people a good life. The young people never knew.
Then they burned the town down to save their reputation or something.
I told her that it sounded like an old making way for the new type dream and that made sense in the context of the subliminal. -
I am having a different type of recon. I just feel lost. I don’t know where I want to go, or what would cause me to be at all happy.
All paths open to me just seem like they’d low grade suck and I really don’t feel any color or excitement for life. No sense that I have anything worth looking forward to or working toward.
This too shall pass.
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- I feel much better today. The sense of anxiety and impending doom is gone along with the lost depressed feeling.
I woke up to really great sex with the wife which we hadn’t done for the last week, and I think the release had something to do with it.
You are a resounding sexcess!
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I had a talk with the wife after I woke up and engaged in some other activities this afternoon.
She was telling me about her therapy session, and said that she thinks that Seductress is helping her to stop questioning wether she is “enough”.
She always used to wonder if she was hot enough, nice enough, (inset other trait here) enough. -
The other activities were VERY good.
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- The ME aspect of Diamond combined with the bath mate is working like gang busters. Both the wife and I think wolfie jr. about twice as big around as it used to be.
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In all seriousness, if you’re going to do what I’m doing, invest in a good skin moisturizer.
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- WE MADE IT!!!
The wife got the notification that she has been approved for disability in the mail today.
I have successfully gotten us through two years and more where I was the only source of income without anything seriously bad happening.
It was amazing how whenever I needed it I was able to find a way through or something manifested to give us what we needed.
Subclub had a lot to do with it. I may have been able to make it without it, but I’m convinced that it would have been a lot rougher.
Thank you for what you have created @SaintSovereign and @fire.
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Woo!!
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- Now I can focus on actually moving things forward for the rest of the year.
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Congratulations I hope they keep on paying you and never stop!
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Thank You.
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In other news I have swapped out PS for just plain S&S. I think that might just get me what I want faster and more directly as well as being a bit lighter on the ol subconscious.
I don’t know that I particularly need to work on my inner game. I feel more confident than I have, well, ever. What I need is work on my outer game. I’ve been with a lot of women, but I really have no idea how I did it. It just seemed to happen and I don’t remember the social interactions well enough to see what I did.
If I ever tried to hit on a girl, it didn’t work. Or not often enough to matter.
I’m planning on being more deliberate about it, and I need some help in that regard. -
The wife is experiencing recon from Seductress. It’s taking the form of ripping on herself.
I explained what it is and told her to ride it out. -
I am feeling happy and relieved at the moment.
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