As I’ve been continuing with HS, I have been watching different videos and wondering to myself, what’s the purpose or point of a marriage?
Why do people want to be married?
Are you happily married?
Do you think you’re better off with a life partner?
5 Likes
There‘s a spectrum of things to consider. From the romantic slash love point of view, at least to me it doesn‘t matter if you sign anything anywhere. Difference between twelve and a dozen.
However, and assuming you are planning to stay together for life: If you‘re a member of a religion in which marriage is something special, that might be a reason to also marry within that religion.
Legally - and that depends a lot on your country - being married vs having a partner might give you a lot of advantages and make some things easier. If your partner‘s a foreigner a marriage probably will make the difference in their right to move to and stay in your country, and vice versa. Either way, you may have tax advantages, inheritance may get easier, getting bank loans may be easier, and legal things related to kids may be as well.
So for me this is more a rational thing, once you‘ve decided to stay together. I‘d say the real difference is in that „deciding to stay together.“ Marriage or not is about your additional beliefs, or about making your legal situation more stable. Marriage has practical consequences, as does not being married. That, on top of everything that may come from family etc.
2 Likes
If you’re a male and living in the United States, there is currently no benefits to marriage. You have too much to lose. If you’re a woman, it’s one of the best financial decision you can make as you can potentially have access to a lifetime gravy train even after the marriage ends.
If you’re outside the United States or outside of the Western world, marriage can still be something male and female can benefit from and thrive in.
6 Likes
It’s a social construct and expectation…
What I am curious about is why folks that are older that aren’t married are considered weird or potentially queer. Who cares? Maybe people either want to be left alone or it’s no one’s business
3 Likes
The gravy train!
When my parents legally separated my dad somehow managed to keep the house and my mom was left with nothing. I still don’t understand that.
2 Likes
I was raised a Christian. I now identify as spiritual.
I would like to marry one person who I would hopefully grow old with.
This would be great.
To bind yourself to the other person, the ring is a symbol of the whole ceremony where you are basically bound to certain vows, forever.
If you want to be with that person for the rest of your life you do marriage and you become one, you join heart and soul, and resources…
If I find the absolute right person and I feel this deep within I will probably marry her because it also gives you a certain stability, and within marriage it is easier to build a family, because of those vows which are like a subconscious contract that you are always reminded of and leads to a certain stability between you and your partner.
I also think it’s not something to be taken lightly…
2 Likes
This is what I envision for the near future!
I get curious about people who never got married or have kids. Why they chose that path.
1 Like
You don’t have to understand it. 
It is the painful reality of tens of thousands of men in the US. Why do you think that right now, any attorney would advise a man to place his money and property in a trust and have a prenup signed before he gets married? By the way even if you signed a prenup, a judge can unilaterally decide that they won’t enforce the prenup. Go and sit for one day in family court to see what happens there!
Just because you’re a part of the tiny minority that hasn’t lived it doesn’t mean that it’s not the current reality. At this point if you’re a man who’s looking to get married and you tell your lawyer that you don’t want to get a prenup, they literally look at you like you lost your mind.
Florida just canceled the law that allowed ex-wife to receive a lifetime spousal support even if they were only married for a couple whether they had children or not. Many other states are like that. That right there is the gravy train.
@TheEmpress : Let me ask you this: please name one single thing that benefit a man in a marriage in the US.
3 Likes
I’m in Canada but I’m assuming it’s similar over here too?
1 Like
There are many legal, and cultural reasons that marriage which you can easily look up online.
Marriage has been a thing since the dawn of man. It’s only recently become the cool thing to completely disregard marriages and bash them “because they are part of the system holding you down or screwing you over”.
The legal and cultural purpose of marriage has evolved overtime and will continue to evolve over time.
It can be a commitment of two people in love, but unfortunately that is not the only case.
In my case, I got married to my wife because it created a deeper invisible bond between us. The societal and legal benefits were just a bonus.
There are many trappings depending on your culture, class, and laws that ebb and flow
At the core of it marriage is a ritual that binds people together on a deep level that cannot be quantified or qualified. This can be polyamorous marriages or monogamous marriages.
If you want strip it down to its energetic level, marriage is an intangible connection of energy between people.
Even if you get separated and hate each other that connection is always there at least while you are alive.
Unfortunately this is true for what was historically common of unwanted marriages as well.
No matter what the circumstances are, all marriages from all cultures, all classrs and all history of humanity is boiled down to a ritual that creates an deep intangible connection between people.
The connection can be for good, neutral, or evil reasons.
The question then becomes what is the purpose or point of that connection?
There you can find your answer. If you are honest with yourself.
5 Likes
Oh my bad! I assumed you were in the US. Divorce law in Canada and the United States is similar in terms of the dissolution of marriage and the division of wealth and child custody. Which means that the male is mostly screwed most of the time. It’s just as bad in the UK. The dwindling marriage numbers in North America also have to do with the fact that men do not see any benefit in entering a marriage. Would you be OK with working for years, accumulating resources, and building a stable financial situation for yourself only to have a sizable portion of it taken away from you just because you were married for a couple years to someone? 
2 Likes
Nope!
Definitely would not be okay with that.
(Delayed response.)
1 Like
Marriage is intended so both of you will enjoy each other intellectually, spiritually, emotionally as well as physically (for companionship, procreation, and redemption). And that they do it for Love not for tradition, legal, or whatever. The problem was this marriage thing was already been tainted for a long time that people tend to bend it around, thinking it might work for them.
Some will marry their own cousins, believing their wealth will stay forever. Some will marry others because the book say so.
But without the correct upbringing, without Love everything else will break down.
I am thinking about the titles like Lineage, Heartsong, and Love Bomb.
3 Likes
To get divorce-graped that’s what. Women in general, want weddings - a special day where it’s all about them, not marriage and all the work it entails except of course for the free house and financial benefits when things go awry. It is a legal contract where the majority of the women are financially rewarded for breaking it. 70% of divorce is initiated by women. Sad to say but they are not as strong as women of the past where women dedicate their entire lives to their families. Nowadays, feelings of boredom or meeting a new potential partner on a dumb app are enough reasons to call it quits. Men have adapted and become less traditional too because why choose that pain when you can just be single and happy? You don’t have to get married to get access to sex thanks to feminism. Sex before marriage has become the norm and female promiscuity is not scorned at the same levels as before, if at all.
4 Likes
Out of curiosity what are your sources for this information?
Are you married yourself or have been married?
How many weddings have you been to? I have been to over 10 and every single one of them including my own was about the couple and their shared connection and love, not just the bride.
Are you aware of the amount of work and planning weddings need to make happen which usually in the U.S in my experience and knowledge is done by the bride?
Why do you believe woman should dedicate their entire lives to their families? Do you think that men should as well?
When you say strong women of the past do you mean women in the 1960s, 1500s, 400s, 400s BCE, 1500s BCE? Also what region and culture are these women a part of?
Why do we have to stick to “traditions” and do what always has been done? Humans have proven quite adaptable, so what is wrong with innovation especially in our culture, gender roles, and how we live our life? Isn’t life about moving forward and improving reality rather than staying stagant and developing complacency?
Why should sex be only within marriages? What does that restriction accomplish? Even if you buy a Ferrari wouldn’t you at least test drive it before you drive off the lot?
What is wrong with female “promiscuity”, why do think it should be scorned?
5 Likes
Health care and tax benefits
An excuse to never go anywhere. Works both ways
1 Like
Based on your questions, it’s clear we have different values. Do your own research to answer all of your questions. I have nothing more to say.
To get a green card jk a lot do because they wanna have kids and create a family. Others do it because they think it’s the right thing to do because it’s part of the script of life
2 Likes