Is one of the biggest issues your fear of being heart broken?
If you’re serious about the relationship, consider discussing future plans. If she’s committed to the relationship, she might reassure you about her intentions during the trip. This could be an opportunity to discuss long-term intentions and where both of you see the relationship going.
This could be a very smart move. It will heal everything that needs to be healed and when you are healed, everything has better outcomes in the end.
Thanks for writing this post.
I will consider running KB, im currently running Hero + Cfw + Paragon so i might replace cfw with KB.
She is very committed to our relationship, we both want to get married in the future.
Id also recommend you (if you do run KB) to not take some huge changing action right away if you feel like the sub is processing hard. Its better to lay back and wait a day or two before taking action to ensure emotions wont get in the way. Keep your head cold and calm and see the magic happen. There is no rush. Ever.
Healing especially something that involves other people requires calm communication and patience and understanding of both sides.
How many romantic relationships have you been in?
If you both plan to marry, this trip is just a short phase in your long journey together.
Stay Connected: Plan regular check-ins while she’s away to maintain your bond.
Focus on You: Use this time for personal growth or hobbies.
Plan Ahead: Think about a trip or activity for when she returns.
This is definitely not a pleasant situation to be in.
“Countries known for their sexually aggressive men”. ~ Jerry Smith 
Whats your take on her friends? Friends tend to drag you down into their vices and virtues.
I highly doubt that this trend of going to these countries is for the pure pleasure of cultural appreciation, as they are historically rich civilizations after all. Considering that this trend is popular after military service, you know, when you’ve been dry for a while and need to blow steam.
She does drink, doesn’t she? Or her friends? Then go to a bar and a club? “I was drunk, he was hot and cute, we had a fight that day, one thing led to another, and I slipped on the peel. etc…”
What does that mean, by the way, to you? Committed and married in the future, what’s been stopping y’all? How old are both of you, anyway? All these commitments, marriages, children, assets and life built together does not guarantee a squat; many a men have ended up in a living hell because of these kinds of beliefs, bankruptcy, homelessness, suicide, depression and mental illnesses, and even jail.
I’m not putting ideas into your head, as your gut already seems to be telling you something, else you wouldn’t be posting this in this forum. However, reality of the matter, this is not a unique situation and it happened, has happened and will continue to happen, often times the outcome is the same; I’d say worse since its a 2-3 months. What is she a nun?
One approach is a sort of an ultimatum, and depending on her maturity and how much she does actually love you, in other words, how valuable you are, it will backfire in your face, so I’d suggest not going for it, but just in case it did:
You could always put your foot down and tell her what you think about the situation and this will tell you right away if she’s gonna be sticking around for the long term, do it in a mature manner, think how one would tackle this situation if they were on a status/romance title (indifferent). Afterwards, you suggest going on a trip together and have fun together, you do seem like you want her to have a great time and enjoy life, after all 
? This is a sort of skip through the BS, no time wasting approach.
You could also be cool with it her going on her 3 months girl trip, I’m shaking my head and sighing as I write this, because I’ve heard of Vegas weekends or girl weekend, but not almost a whole season. Sweet Jesus, man, that’s like one of the worst long distance relationship ever. Back to my point, if you are going to be cool with her going, and that’s the outcome that I’m predicting; then, remain INDIFFERENT. Do NOT ever, show your insecurity, and if you do show it, or have, then learn that that’s there within you and needs to be eliminated, because all of this is about your growth.
Knowing that if woman wanted to cheat, She. Will. Cheat. Where there is a will, there is a way. Even if you locked her in a closet. So don’t be possessive as if she is the last piece in the store, or fish in the pond, or whatever metaphor you fancy.
How’s your sex life, btw? Her eyes are still en-flamed by passion and her womb longs for ya? The fires wane in time, but you two seem young for that.
One last advice, do yourself a great favor, and let go of that nonsense of equating time and commitment with faithfulness and fidelity. Never been thing. Humans are humans. Keep working towards your goals and do not prance around the house wondering about her, get busy.
@Phoermes
Well we didn’t marry because we are still young and i dont have a lot of money.
Our sex life is great we have sex at least once a day and it’s very primal and animalistic, very sexually polarizing.
Another thing i should mention is that currently she have more money than me and she helps me a lot with money, on stuff i needed for my car and such.
She doesn’t go to clubs, she usually drinks only when im with her and if than she doesn’t drink a lot.
Thanks, that’s a good advice.
This is not true.
That’s just you predicting the future.
Peace is not the result of “doing everything right”. It tends to come over time when you face reality, deal with it the best you can, and when you take responsibility for your choices.
You are working to do all of those things and you will have more and more times of peace.
At the same time, who wants to be self-satisfied and complacent? It’s good to keep learning. Too much peace is not always what the doctor ordered.
You wait until post 102 to mention this detail?!!
Goddamn malkuth, you spittin🔥. Extremely well written and thought provoking like always
Let me tell you something. It isn’t “toxic” or “controlling” to tell your woman that you don’t date women who go on girls trips.
If you were truly toxic and controlling, you would lock her up and she wouldn’t be able to do what she wants.
But of course you aren’t that sort of person (thank goodness) and you have already told her your feelings on the matter.
Am stating this point since many people throw around terms like “toxic” and “controlling” and “trust issues” when a man has his standards.
Don’t be afraid to give an ultimatum since women aren’t afraid to give ultimatums to men. Why should you as a man be afraid? Even if she breaks up with you over this, she will at least respect you for having the courage to state your requirements.
For a short duration of time, this is fine. But for the long term, do work on this for improving your own sense of self-worth and that provider side of being a man. Providing both for yourself and your woman/family/etc.
Produce a script and allow the author in you to decide how it all plays out. Then direct the scenes & guide the actors accordingly.
Does your movie include cheaters? Heartbreakers?
I am a sucker for romantic comedies/dramas with happy endings personally.
Neville Goddard wrote about the four mighty ones for creating the scene of your wish fulfilled.
Producer and Author are done at the subconscious level and then consciously director and actor.
What do you want? What implies you have it?
Make a scene that implies that and know it’s done.
Anything other than what you want gets cut and the actors will reveal it accordingly.
This is why conscious guidance is essential. Use that gatekeeper.
Notice your thoughts feelings beliefs triggers and added meaning to the things you pick up with your 5 senses and go back to what you produced and wrote. 
Keep bringing yourself back to what you want.
Everything we pick up with our senses reveals where we are at on a deeper subconscious level.
Use your power at your command.
If she’s never mentioned going on a trip like this before then that whole “ this is my dream” line is BS and she may have just be saying that to automatically try and make it hardest for you to have a tougher time objecting to her participating.
But let’s say it really is her dream…In that case either way I’m just gonna have to state the facts here…most ppl these days cheat in some way, especially when they feel as if they can’t be caught, whether you wanna accept that or not.
Doesn’t matter if they never travel or stay local and it doesn’t matter if they’re going on trips alone or with friends. People are gonna do what they want in the end.
Now that we have that established, you already said yourself in the original post that you’re not ok with this trip in your own mind. She hasn’t even left yet and for some reason you’re already having doubts, which means you may know or suspect something about her that the rest of us here on the forum can’t pick up on obviously because you’re the one that’s with her.
Based on both your own personal experience with previous relationships and/or your own reasons with being uncomfortable with her decision to travel, do you think you’re just being paranoid or is there some part of you that doubts her loyalty to you?
If you believe that strongly that she’ll cheat while she’s gone then break it off. You’ll do yourself, nor her any favors by driving yourself insane with paranoia and mistrust for 3+ months while she’s away, and who knows how much longer afterwards upon her return. If what she’s doing bothers you that much, then prioritize your own mental peace and sanity and just leave. She seems to have made the decision without even talking to you first so whether she’s faithful or not, that’s already a big red flag.
Do know this though, if you’re ever with someone else in the future and she decides to travel are you gonna break up with her over a trip too?…if this woman is married to you would you divorce her over a girls trip?
I’m not judging or mocking you by any means but simply trying to offer different perspectives for you to approach this situation from. It’s a waste of time and energy to focus on something that hasn’t and may not even happen, but of course ppl cheating on vacation definitely does happen. From here you have to decide what you’re willing to deal with and how to deal with it all.
Take a few days and think it over. Should you decide ultimately that you’re unwilling to stay with her then that’s your choice, and allow no one to put you down because of it. You’re your own man and you want to live the way you want to live, if that means you don’t tolerate girls trips then so be it.
Should you decide to stay or leave, you’re better off taking the 3 months to focus on and improve yourself in any way you could think of. You’ll have much more time and energy to do your own thing. Fact of the matter is, you can only control you…damn everything else.
I know what you may be thinking, what if she leaves, comes back and turns out she never cheated (according to her own words). Well then may be you were wrong but no matter what you’ll never know the truth anyway.
Take all factors into consideration, don’t rush yourself and make sure that whatever decision you make is that one you truly want to. Should you remain with her then treat the relationship like any other and take things a day at a time.
Lol maybe im not as wise as you thought after all
Well i am 23 and she is 21, we are like 5 months together.
So nothing is really planned, we just want to.
Thanks for writing this post 
@RagnarLothbrok not to pile on to things to consider, but have you talked to her about your concerns yet? Specifically, has she disclosed what were her intentions/goals with going on the trip were initially?
Because from how you describe her she sounds like a good quality girl (she doesn’t drink much, she loves and respects you etc.) and there are tangible differences between a woman who’d respect you regardless of circumstances and one who wouldn’t.
Any conversation you have with her would be more telling than what we have to say given we don’t know her or her motivations.
Her intentions are mostly nature and stuff, but she also want to go the a festival maybe.
You are. And it’s even more impressive at 23.
That’s a little young these days to be locking it down. Would probably be good for you yourself to have a few more experiences and adventures. You don’t have to, of course. There are places in the world and in history where people locked it all down even when they were 18.
But would probably be good.
I"m not saying you need to go out there and be a floozy or something. haha.
But I think you’re probably gripping things pretty tightly.
Seems like there’s some important internal stuff to explore around that. (And as I said above, this is at least 70% based on personal projection of my own life experiences. Probably more. And that goes for everyone else who has written on here too. So take it all with a grain of salt.)
But yes, especially with such incredible tools for healing, development, and unfolding available; might as well give it a go. Khan. Wanted Black. Dragon Reborn. And so on… And so on…
Even in the midst of committed structure, we still need to cultivate internal flexibility. The security of a committed relationship is no escape from evolution, change, and development. The woman or man someone loves will look pretty damn different 10 years later. And if you’re doing it right, that’s actually a good thing. But the point is, even if you stay together, you’re still going to lose what you have right now. Just like you lost elementary school when you went to middle school and high school.
Meh. Anyway. Good luck with it all.