Don’t you give up on your dreams! Don’t you do it! No matter what!
1 Like
12/30/2021 So some thoughts for the day my husband is on unpaid leave in order to get his job back he has to attend a counseling program and meet with a therapist once a week yes stressful of course but here Is the blessing I’ve been trying to get my husband to start therapy for years he has a lot of trauma to heal from and really needs professional help of course throughout the years I’ve done all I can to help him but ended up losing myself in the process the first 2 years of our marriage I put on 100 pounds due to all the disappointment and trauma I went through after realizing what type of person I married and obviously I had horrible coping skills at that time as well. Well fast forward I started taking accountability for my actions and the true transformation within Me began and now here I am. Questions is seductress trying to Manifest my desired marriage by totally shaking things up in my life for example now my husband has no option if he wants his job he has to better himself and get help. Or worst case scenario my husband doesn’t take any of this seriously and sinks even deeper did this happen to show me there is no hope and I need to call it quits and move on with my life. Or is this mogul zp putting the pressure on to step up my game because financially my backs against the wall and I need to make some power moves Quick.
12/31/2021 4:40 am. I’m trying to communicate with my husband and get a plan of action together trying to see what moves we need to make to stay afloat of course all he is doing is snapping at me and is very irritated by me I guess because I’m interrupting his call of duty video game session. His only response is I’m on 5 years probation with my job and I can’t smoke anymore sarcastically saying I’m so ready for the new years in other words no accountability or remorse on his part he loves to play the victim role I don’t have time for this I need to focus on me at this point to make sure my daughters are good and most importantly to make sure I’m good and putting in the effort to do what I need to do so that my girls are taken care of no more giving energy to those that refuse help or refuse the change that can lead them to bettering themselves the weakest link must go. I will never lose myself again over foolishness never .
I keep listening to this song tried to find an edited version if it’s too explicit I will remove
Ok I have to finish moving over the rest tomorrow ive reached my limit almost done. Have a great day everyone !
01/02/2022 Today I’m feeling like I’m on a emotional Rollercoaster my mom was over for a few days she tends to raise my anxiety levels but sometimes I need fuel added to my fire to get me going so it’s not completely a bad thing the issue is when I’m trying to stay in a positive state and have confidence that everything is going to work out for the best she tends to have a habit of bringing up everything negative like for example yesterday kept telling me I don’t eat enough, I have bad habits I need to think about my health more cause I’m all the girls have and I don’t want to end up in the hospital.These are her assumptions she has no idea of the effort im putting in right now just to stay sane i just dont feel the need to share certain things with her cause she always turns around with judgment and criticism.Then went on to say she’s never been married but she’s been in my shoes regarding being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love her and doesn’t help with the kids. Then today she called me and said you know you really need to make a choice you and the girls have been through enough your husband isn’t going to change he doesn’t care about you or those girls and your part of the blame for any emotional trauma they are going through. I will say I innerstand what’s she’s saying I do. I have tried to not be so consumed with the negative, take one day at a time work torwards becoming the best version of myself that I can be which includes not focusing on my husband and his faults constantly but focusing on what it is I can change within myself to make things better yes it’s been a slow process but now I’m feeling a forceful push that’s telling me it’s time! Make a move! Not 100% what the right move is 
or how to go about it. With that being said today I’m feeling cold, dark lost and afraid. I can’t talk to my husband about anything he either leaves the house or I have to have a conversation with him while he’s playing call of duty with his headphones on I don’t have the tolerance for the eye rolling I get when I try to start a conversation it’s insulting and the feeling I get is degrading. I sometimes wonder if I’m sharing to much on here but I assume this is part of Journaling. I know I’m going to look back at this entry one day and say wow look how far I’ve come. At that moment i felt like I was in a situation that was impossible to overcome but I did! Hey I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. I can’t wait to get some rest and listen to my seductress and UA loops tonight I feel I will gain some clarity this week. I’m also doing some spiritual work to protect me against evil eye and things of that nature. 
4 Likes
You’re not sharing too much!
No better people to share it with, than us, who know that your situation can, and will, improve.
I hope you feel better soon, don’t forget to sleep plenty.
1 Like
Thank you, your words definitely help put me at ease and take away some of the stress I feel when I’m writing my entry and look over it 10 times making sure nothing is inappropriate or said carelessly. Thank you I’m going to get some rest and down some water have a headache. Appreciate you, forum and subclub no doubt 
2 Likes
Dag I’m slipping yall it’s a new moon today ok it makes sense now not that this applies to everyone(personal experience)but I always try to keep track of the moon phases over the years I’ve observed I always get like this during the new moon and full moon well the Full moon used to effect me more now it’s new moons when I get into this funky hopeless what next mentality and i have these emotional instabilities. For a while i had them under control once i was aware but with the subs doing their work i feel things are intensified. Ok I’m good it will pass 
need to write out some solid goals that’s whats going on. I’ve been procrastinating on that a bit thanks mama moon & Mogul ZP:wink:
2 Likes
Just want to say I understand that struggle of wanting to be an artist full time but getting pulled back into the 9-5 grind. I hope UA gives you the pathways to maintain the lifestyle you want and looking forward to seeing how it all unfolds.
2 Likes
Edit: Copied from intro page
Happy New Year !!! Woke up today thinking about vitamins and supplements I need to step up my game I’m sure falling off my supplement routine has caused some low energy levels ,bad concentration,low mood, pain and fibromyalgia flares and bad food cravings. Gotta get myself in check
Multivitamin
Collagen
Fish oil
Vitamin c
Probiotics
Spirulina
More alkaline water
I still drink my green tea every other day so I’m good there.
My skin care routine is on point thanks to seductress 
Take care of your mind, body and soul 
1 Like
Edit: Copied from intro page
Oh and can’t forget vitamin D here in Cleveland its a must to survive the winter months.
Edit: Copied from intro page
01/01/2022 ok so I just finished doing my moms hair took about 2 hours so I zoned out for a bit and I was in deep thought. I was thinking back to when I was listening to my stack of UA, Seductress and my custom vs my current stack UA,Seductress and Mogul zp. I’ve ran 5 loops In total of mogul zp so far. 1st time 1 loop, 2nd and 3rd time 2 loops.looking back I noticed when I ran my custom I Manifested unexpected money almost everytime or somthing very positive would happen immediately.My custom does have R.I.C.H in it. Omg guys this is why it’s so important to journal its really thought provoking and has really helped me put things together cause sometimes i don’t always realize what’s going on in the present moment. I also noticed the drive and motivation I had when listening to my custom I woke up everyday with this fire inside me to get going and be productive, at the time I thought this was Seductress because it increases confidence and as far as my art work productivity I thought that was coming from UA. but since switching out my custom for Mogul I think I’m experiencing a bit of recon I am having vivid dreams but I can’t really make sense of them, and as much as i hate to admit I am feeling a little lost and overwhelmed there have definitely been some major shifts in my life recently and im not going to say they are bad but definitely forcing some change i dont want to give into weakness if Mogul is trying to make me stronger and maybe its trying to help me develop some problem solving skills when life get tough. I know I have to be patient with the process but I’m wondering if I should switch back to my custom 
if I do should I do a washout? Maybe I made the mistake of not doing a washout before staring Mogul zp 
I’m going to list the modules in my custom I was supposed to do that a while ago.I always said my custom was all over the place and should have waited to bulid until i was more experienced with subclub but im starting to realize maybe i wasnt to off with my choices Your thoughts and opinions are appreciated.
Crystal Goddess Custom:
AURA
Auric Overdriver
Chosen of Venus
Energetic Development
Libertine Ultima Core
Sphaera Magnetica
Apollon
Extreme Exercise Motivation
Fat Burn
Physicality Shifter - Sexiness
Financial Success Reality Shifter
R.I.C.H.Ultima Core
Wealth Limit Destroyer
Unrelenting Wealth Motivation
Energy Love Bomb Ultima Core
Divine Will
Jupiter
Current Invoker
Fortune’s Favorite
Avatar
2 Likes
01/04/2022 I’m doing OK mind is everywhere still trying to come up with my list of goals. My little ones have been bouncing off the wall last few days its been a zoo around here. I feel like my days are spent cleaning up after them lol. As soon as I sit down Mommy! Mommy! Fighting, ice cream all over the floor, cup of water spilled, bath time Mommy! Mommy there’s water all over the floor 
Mommy Luna had an accident(our puppy). We have been playing this board game called brain games my 7 year old has beat me every time I’m raising free spirited geniuses 
. I decided I might take an extra day off on my loops so my brain can process everything. I’ve looked up info on a washout trying to figure out if that’s somthing I may need to do soon I will see how the extra day off effects me. I will be going over to my brother’s on the 15th to start on the barn door project. I’ve been trying to read or reread magickal riches by Damond Brand since yesterday my focus is lacking. Once I get the girls in bed tonight I will make sure I do that no matter how tired I am. I need to work on a painting too but I’m out of floetrol I’ve been tempted to paint without it but it helps to stretch and conserve my paint so I don’t have to use as much.
3 Likes
Reading aloud (often into a digital recorder) while moving, helps me to focus; but of course that’s extremely specific, may not be everyone’s preference. I sometimes imagine that I may go back and listen to these ‘audiobooks’ that I’ve created, but that’s actually pretty rare.
For Magickal Riches, the main part to read is the description of the Master Money Ritual. If you have very limited time/energy, you can zoom into the section called ‘The Act of Magick’ and the very next section called ‘The Master Money Ritual’. That would be enough to get you started.
2 Likes
Thanks @Malkuth that’s a great idea especially because I do seem to get through Audiobooks easier so I think this would be perfect for me. Question if you don’t mind sharing I did the master money ritual in June along with the ladder ritual from the Archangels of power book. I know they say with some of the rituals you don’t have to repeat have you done it more than once? I may be thinking of words if power but either way I am going to do the ritual again it’s Been over 6 months.
Thanks again I really appreciate it.
2 Likes
01/04/2022 Just one observation still trying to figure out if there is a solid connection to this. I’ve noticed since venus went retrograde seductress is hitting me a bit differently. I feel like its forcing me to focus more of my self worth and setting boundaries with others. In my chart my Venus is in capicorn. So it’s hitting me hard (money & relationships). I’ve never thought of retrogrades as a bad thing they give you a 2nd chance to learn a lesson you may have failed at learning in the past. Hope that makes sense. Brain fog again I’m going to go read and get some rest.
1 Like
Hahaha. I was actually holding back from sharing more because I wanted to give you space to have your own experience.
When the Master Money Ritual is done the first time it is done for 11 days. Every subsequent time after that it only needs to be done for 3 days. A standard recommendation is to do it every 3 or 4 months or so.
I looked back in my logs and saw that I did it the first time back in 2018. The next time I did it was last week at the end of 2021. But I’ll probably be doing it every 3 months or so going forward. I’ll follow my intuition.
1 Like
I love this. It’s helpful to read your reflections on this. I just learned about the Venus retrograde that we’re currently in. I feel that I’ve been feeling it too. A lot of questioning about my relationship and the issues in it.
I deeply admire the teacher Steven Forrest. He’s written one of the classics of modern astrology, and I love his focus on the evolutionary and psychological perspectives.
Anyway. Here he is sharing his views on our current Venus Retrograde.
1 Like
@Malkuth I just listened omg! this is exactly on point this definitely gave me Clarity it all makes sense. Thank you
1 Like
Thank you for sharing that with me.
1 Like