1 loop of Khan St2.
Khans fall on there way to greatness dust up themselves and keep moving, I can’t remain stagnant crying over the past.
This is where my journey to rebuild myself begins,I don’t care want my past looks like all I know is that my future gat something of worth .
I must say I woke up feeling anew, like I am REBORN, this is my first time running a full loop of Khan St2. I slept peacefully and dreamt some things I can’t even recall.
I know within me that this St2 would change me for Good ,I can feel it my senses can perceive it.
My backpains are gone, my sacral chakra feels full and healthy.
Today I made up my mind to buy a book and every day I will write on one page every night–
“[Only one peek is all it’s takes to become a Slave]”
This is to instill this belief to my subconscious than One video of porn is all it takes to control you. The brain does not care, it acts primitively.
Since Running total reprogramming I notice strong desire to almost every feminine that cross my path. I don’t like this in some way because it raises my insecurities on how I can’t get that woman or some sort of am too short(5.8ft) or small to attract women.
During this internal battle with my inner self I get aroused, my breath starts changing but I will do nothing but to look at the feminine curves and features that attract me and start breathing in or out to let that sexual flow through me and heal me.(I learnt this from the Way of Superior Man)
This desire is so strong that I’m starting to get uncomfortable with it, countless of times I told my self that I have to drop Khan that this ain’t the time to run it since am still 23Yrs old.
Push through. I had a similar experience. But after a week it went away and what remained was an elevated sexual energy at my disposal for taking action.
Seriously?? I guess am still a newbie on learning how to circulate my sexual energy to all parts of my body, I can say I always get uncomfortable whenever I see an attractive woman,like I want to burst or disappear!!
The way of Superior Man has taught me a lot though, I hope Khan help me in terms of controlling my sexual energy and to use it effectively!!
I noticed attraction to the feminine is evitable it’s something the masculine can’t avoid.
When am still in college I used to think getting attracted to a woman is a sin (lust ) and evil , coupled with the religious teaching that lust is from the pit of hell.
Khan is showing you what you have to get rid of to have the life of a Khan. That response doesn’t serve you.
You will come to expect beautiful women in your life and it will be normal. Then you can more clearly see who may be the right partner for you.
Thanks @Skadoosh.
It seems one cant deceive the world which is feminine, so far as it’s concerned it keeps on testing the masculine (his self control, confidence and sense of composure) that’s why I started self development and discovered Subclub after all, to develop this high sense of resistance to Pmo.
Since Running Am, Regeneration, Primal, I Don’t know if I have achieved that because as time goes on I still fall back to the same trap I vowed not to.
So far I still have life left in me I can’t settle for mediocrity I will keep on fighting till I win.
If I should calculate my days inthe last 5 years I can say that my days of abstinence is much higher than my days of relapsing but that’s not enough.
I want to escape this chain and never come back which I have achieved already starting from today.
Slept off this night and starting dreaming intensively,my friends in that very dream became untrustworthy and looks for my trouble.
I become very stressed out in the dreams to the extent I even cried in that dream …why are they doing this to me?? I asked within me till I woke up in the middle of the night.
The dreams I have noticed since Running Total Reprogramming is related to betrayal and wars .
Today, I started thinking how I want to speak in public and be confident without fidgeting or unsure of my words.
I want to able to talk to the masses someday and persuade them to buy something from me which subliminal can I use to achieve this fit?
So far…
I noticed total reprogramming is not an easy one to run ,it’s even harder than Khan Total Breakdown, countless of times I have taught of dropping sublimals totally.
But I can quit at this moment nahh even all this, my sexual energy is high but I find it difficult to approach woman.
This morning I got this dopamine bliss for about 4hrs, anmt some point I started looking out for romance movies with sex scenes,after long rationalization I told my self movies can’t satisfy this deep craving I gotta go out and meet real chicks…
I noticed also am becoming to concerned to the feminine body parts instead of connecting with them emotionally.
This happened to me too, I thought that TR was going to be easier than TB. But when I thougth about it it all made sense…
Total Breakdown breaks down everything that stands in the way for the program of Khan, but in a way you are still yourself mostly, or at least the one you remember. But Total Reprogramming is litterally installing a new you, and that’s why it’s so hard on you, because it makes has you questioning it all the way and you feel lost.
TB → Cleaning the computer of unwanted junk and viruses
TR → Installs a completely new software/operating system on the computer
So the next time you open the computer after a new update or version, you will feel lost and things will have changed a bit. But after a while you will learn the new software and it will feel normal again.
So to me TR is the real test and what I found the easiest was to acknowledge that this is going to be hard and confusing and that it’s okay for it to be that way for a while, all in all… don’t fight it.
Total reprogramming will interfere a lot with your daily life and thoughts, but it’s only temporary.
Brother thank you.
Currently I feel like am not myself this uneasiness to even talk, or talk back when someone gets me angry, my insecurities seems to increase more unlike before,
On total breakdown I have this urge to approach women but now I can’t tell.
I can’t even explain fully what am feeling at this moment.
I will stick to it no matter what,let’s see where it takes me .
Women and wealth will come easily; but you are still required to take action. And while Total Reprogramming sounds easier than Total Breakdown, do not be fooled – Total Reprogramming will make you question yourself and your deepest aspirations, emotions, beliefs, personality traits… until you come out reforged with a purpose akin to steel.
Just know and accept this period, and as it says in the description, it will make you question everthing that stands in the way. All negative thoughts and willingness to stop or switch sub is brougth there for you to transcend into something new.
In a completely dark room you cannot see the cobwebs, but when you turn on the lights you can see them. Now you have to options, either turn off the lights again and go back to sleep, or you can dust the cobwebs away and enjoy a spider free room…
Been a while since I have written here.
I have to say I find it hard to get myself here and journal.
Current Observations so far on Total reprogramming…
•Every night I run it I woke up in the morning with my heart heavy and my core grounded.
•Morning erections.
•People seem to respect me in some way I don’t even understand, some young girls just greet me like am much older than them, men way older than me will wave at me before I even greet.
•Some girls scared to stare at me face to face.
•My heart feels heavy and occupied by a strong force.
•I talk less, even when I feel to talk I find it hard to talk.
•Recently I noticed I can parse my emotions when necessary.
•I do engage less in arguments, once I notice you are trying to prove you are correct I shut my mouth up.
P:S I added Love Bomb for humanity to Total reprogramming–7 mins on Lbh in the morning ,1 loop on Khan St2 at night.
Applied for a job, went for interview now for deployment which is taking time because the Manager decided to orientate us for about a week. I noticed the females working there are trying to test me by using their positions there.(Kinda of Shit test)
I tend to get angry whenever I notice one enforcing rules on me, but I gat no option now so far am working for someone I had to bend down and get what I wanted first .
In the company, they pray together,eat together like a family, we the newly employed guys are asked to introduce ourselves.
Before the Mic reached my turn I started feeling uncomfortable and tense because that’s the first time I spoke in public , reaching my turn I grabbed the mic and spoke without any inhibition. Woow!! --I just said my name and state of origin.
Ran one loop of Khan St2 yesterday night.
Woke up that morning as if something is in my belly like one force that is new to me.
Fast forward after Church tryed watching movies but I couldn’t calm down to watch one, I always fast forward the movie to watch the action partand leave, I couldn’t see myself sitting in a place to watch movies again instead I prefer to play around the internet reading one article or novel .
Ran last loop of Khan St2 today starting washout for next cycle.
