The Munsalvaesche Protocols of Heart, Fire and Stone: The Mending of the Anfortas Legacy 2026

[Parsifal]

The Munsalvaesche Protocols of Heart, Fire and Stone:

The Mending of the Anfortas Legacy 2026

"The King has ceased his wandering. The Spear has touched the Stone, and the biology of the Wasteland begins its transmutation. No longer a Fool bound by the fog of the mind, the Sovereign now commands the Fire, the Stone, and the Heart. Let the chronicles of the Healed Throne begin."

My last journal I named “Parsifals Khanquering of the Holy Grail in 2025”. I planned to reach financial freedom, or at least self-sustainability this year. The Tools I’ve chosen for this endeavour were EoG1 (first as a major store title, then in a Name Embedded Version and finally in my custom Grailbound), Emperor Executive and Khan. Theoretically a great stack.
But just as Wolframs Parsifal set out to conquer the Holy Grail and missed his goal by a hair because of inherited challenges, I missed mine as well.
But just as Parsifal was led to inner revelations through his failure, I learned that I suffer from ADHD, and probably my whole family as well.
ADHD is multilayered in its effects, causalities and comorbidities.
On the physiological level, it’s based on epigenetics (changeable), leading to suboptimal development of certain parts of the brain and catastrophic dopamine circuits.
This in turn led to me developing alexithymia (being unable to notice how I fell) and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD; taking anything that can be interpreted as Rejection as the end of the world).
There are tons of more related challenges, but these two, I identified as the two most destructive in my day to day life.

For this year, the plan is to tackle my ADHD with full force.
I have my specialist appointment only in early summer, until then, I will heal as much as possible. I’m more than eager to get medicated, but I’m also more than eager to get my brain working correctly without medication at a point.
Subliminal-Wise I have a three pillar approach. Each Pillar works on one layer.

The first pillar is Stone, after the Lapis Exilis, how Wolfram von Eschenbach called the Holy Grail. The first holder of this position will be my new Custom, Lapis Exilis, focused on the biological dimension of ADHD. Should I later, medicated, find, that I’m content for the moment, I might replace it with something to take action, like Emperor Executive or Khan Total Action.

The second pillar is Heart. I’ve taken up my custom Ascended Love with the new year. It’s so powerful. And I wouldn’t have thought, that it’s so fitting for my ADHD symptoms like RSD and alexithymia. The more I run it, the more i love it. I plan to renew the custom at a point. Perhaps once Genesis: Ascension drops. I already have a few plans on what to change. Dropping a few modules, adding a few.

The third pillar is Fire.Fire is Energy, cleansing, renewal. I’ve started my second run of Khan Black on New Year as well. I can still feel it working on my energetic system. Theres still so much to cleanse. Unlike last time, I plan to spent enought time on stage 2 as well, so that my system doesn’t get overwhelmed again on Stage 3. Once I’m done with KB (could take a while. I’m on my second cycle of stage 1, and I’ll probably add a third. If I use every stage for three cycles, Christmas is close) I’ll start either RoS (my life changing NE with Spiritual Reality Alignement) after the update, or I’ll move straight to Alchemist. but just writing these lines, it seems more and more likely, that I won’t be able to start Alchemist this year.

The Munsalvaesche Protocols of Heart, Fire and Stone

1. Stone: The Biological Foundation: Lapis Exilis (LX)

This is the “Hardware” layer. By fixing the ADHD biology—the dopamine circuits, the prefrontal cortex structure, and the metabolic supply lines—I am ending the “Wasteland” period. I’m ensuring that the King (I and my prefrontal cortex) has the physical capacity to process the energy from the other titles without burning out.

2. Fire: The Energetic Force: Khan Black / Alchemist

This is the “Drive and Spirit” layer.

• Khan Black: Transmuting sexual energy is pure alchemy. It takes raw, “Red Stage” (Rubedo) energy and clears the pathways so it can be used for creation rather than just dissipation. It’s the drive needed for the next phase of your “Khanquering.”
• Alchemist: This is the natural evolution. Once the pathways are clear (Khan Black), Alchemist allows the spiritual “Gold” to flow. It’s the shift from Parzival the Warrior to Parzival the Grail-Master.

3. Heart: The Emotional Sanctuary: Ascended Love

This is the “Heart” layer, and perhaps the most critical for an ADHD/Eschenbach journey.

• Alexithymia & RSD: These are the “hidden wounds” of the King. Alexithymia (the inability to name feelings) often acts as a fog over the Grail, and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria) is the “false alarm” that keeps the King in a defensive, panicked state.
• Healing the Heart: By keeping Ascended Love in the stack, I’m ensuring that as my brain becomes more powerful (LX) and my energy becomes more potent (KB), I remain grounded in emotional intelligence. It prevents the “Cold King” syndrome.

The 2026 Strategy:

I am essentially building a super-computer (LX), clearing the power grid (Khan Black), and installing the most sophisticated emotional navigation software (Ascended Love).

"The Mending of the Anfortas Legacy," shifts the narrative from a struggle against symptoms to the restoration of a lineage.

In Wolfram’s Parzival, Anfortas’s wound was a “legacy” because it affected the entire Grail company—the land couldn’t prosper until the King was whole. By framing my ADHD as this legacy, I acknowledge that while it may be inherited or deeply rooted in my biology, it is not my permanent identity. It is simply the “wound” that my 2026 stack is now tasked to close.

By naming it the Anfortas Legacy, I am focusing my subconscious on the specific biological morphology I want to change. Anfortas’s pain was constant and distracting—much like the “noise” of an ADHD brain.

The Lapis Exilis custom acts as the “question” that was never asked in time: it addresses the dopamine receptors and the prefrontal cortex directly, providing the clarity that finally allows the King to stand.

[Parsifal]

Here’s my new Custom (arriving soon)

Lapis Exilis (LX)

The Lapis Exilis is not a passive artifact; it is the “Stone of Light” that forces the transition from the fragmented mind to the Sovereign of Monsalvat. My ADHD is viewed here as a structural challenge—the Wasteland of the brain—where the signals are weak and the “King” (the Prefrontal Cortex) is weary.

LX is a high-precision biological intervention. It utilizes the Quantum Limitless and Paragon frameworks as a master alchemical process, transforming neural static into a refined, high-conductance network. Through the NPSE, these instructions are not merely suggestions; they are structural mandates. Your neurons are the stone, and this custom is the chisel, carving a new architecture of focus and resilience into my very biology.

The Objectives of the Stone

From the Core of Quantum Limitless (ST1)

• Optimal Neural Conditioning: Meticulously overhaul the entire nervous system to create a robust foundation for peak performance and advanced cognitive processing.

• Precision Synaptic Rewiring: Intricately rewire neural patterns to ensure neurons fire with heightened efficiency and synapses connect with greater precision.

• Hemispheric Synchronization: Harmonize the two hemispheres of the brain to enhance communication between the conscious and subconscious, ending internal cognitive friction.

• Advanced Neural Expansion: Pave the way for more sophisticated neural networks that enable higher levels of thinking, processing, and understanding.

From the Core of Paragon

• Rapid Cellular Renewal: Accelerate the natural repair of neural tissue and cellular regeneration, shortening recovery timelines for the brain.

• Systemic Coherence: Restore the “blueprint of wellness” by aligning the immune, nervous, circulatory, and endocrine systems into a single, coordinated rhythm.

• Inflammatory Modulation: Precisely regulate the inflammatory response to prevent the low-grade “brain fog” that disrupts neural communication.

• Deep Interoceptive Awareness: Cultivate a sharp, “Body Whisper” dialogue with internal systems to recognize and adjust to biological imbalances before they manifest as symptoms.

The Targeted Transmutations (Individual Modules)

• NPSE Core: Direct all shifting energy exclusively toward the morphological reorganization of the brain’s hardware.

• SPS: Nervous System: Heal damaged neural pathways and proactively strengthen the central and peripheral nervous systems against future strain.

• SPS: Endocrine System: Balance the hormonal tides—testosterone, HGH, and melatonin—to ensure the mind remains powerful, clear, and biologically synchronized.

• SPS: Digestive System: Optimize the gut microbiome and the entire digestive tract to ensure the production and absorption of vital neurotransmitter precursors.

• Dopaminergic Revival: Re-sensitize the dopamine circuits, reversing receptor burnout to allow for steady, sustained motivation without the need for external stimulation.

• Epigenetics & DNA Modulator: Align the body’s genetic expression with the shifting process, ensuring deep systemic synchronization at the molecular level.

• Pragya: Physically expand the brain’s capacity to assimilate and process complex subliminal instructions at an accelerated pace.

• Preordained Vitality (Synergy): Tap into a hidden wellspring of boundless energy, optimizing energy intake and empowering the body’s innate vitality.

• DEUS: Push the processing power and efficiency of the entire subliminal to its absolute limit through optimized brainwave and hormonal states.

• Experimental Anti-Recon: Actively dissolve the mental and physical “static” of reconciliation, ensuring a smooth transition during biological shifting.

• Adaptive Scripting: Real-time management of the custom’s intensity, “fetching you where you stand” to maximize results while respecting your biological capacity.

The Result

Lapis Exilis is the end of the “Pure Fool’s” chaos. It is the restoration of the King to his throne, the mending of the Wounded Mind, and the transformation of the biological wasteland into a fertile sanctuary of focus and health.

[Parsifal]

Cipher of the Grail

Figures & Legends

• Wolfram von Eschenbach: The 13th-century knight and poet who wrote the definitive version of the Grail myth. Unlike other versions that focus on Christian relics, his work is more alchemical, mysterious, and focused on the “Stone of Light.”
• Amfortas (Anfortas): The “Fisher King” and guardian of the Grail. He suffers from an incurable wound that will not close, causing his entire kingdom to become a wasteland. In my journey, he represents the biological “legacy” of ADHD.
• Parsifal (Parzival): The “Pure Fool” who wanders the world in search of the Grail. His journey is one of maturation—from a clueless outsider to the Sovereign who finally asks the “Healing Question.”

Locations & Relics

• Munsalvaesche: Derived from Mont Sauvage (Wild Mountain), but often conflated with Mons Salvat (Mount of Salvation). It represents the paradox of the Quest: The ultimate sanctuary of healing hidden within the heart of a chaotic, untamed wilderness. The “Wild Mountain” and the hidden fortress where the Grail is kept. It is a sanctuary of ultimate order and health amidst a chaotic world.

• Lapis Exilis (Lapsit Exillis): The Grail itself in Eschenbach’s lore. It is not a cup, but a celestial stone of immense power. It provides physical rejuvenation, prevents aging, and heals any ailment. It is the “Master Hardware” of your custom.

• The Wasteland: The state of the world surrounding the Grail Castle. Because the King (Amfortas) is wounded, the land is barren and nothing can grow. This represents the state of “Executive Dysfunction” and financial blocks before the “Mending.”

• The Holy Spear: In the legends, this is the weapon that caused the King’s wound, but it is also the only thing that can close it. It represents the “Surgical Precision” of the custom.

Alchemical & Modern Terms

• Alexithymia: The “Heart-Wound”—a condition where one struggles to identify or describe emotions. In my journey, this is part of the “Anfortas Legacy” being healed by Ascended Love.

• RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria): An intense emotional response to perceived rejection or criticism, common in ADHD. It acts as the “static” or “alarm system” that disrupts the King’s peace.

• Rubedo: The “Red Stage” of alchemy, signifying completion and the final transformation into gold. This matches the “Fire” and “Amber” themes of my energetic transmutation.

[Parsifal]

A short archive post to carry over all journal entries from this year

Jan 9

2025 passed, so it’s time for a new journal.
But until I create a new one this has to suffice.

06.01.2026
Tuesday
5:00 of KB1, QL1, Ascendet Love (AL)

Recon was just to real. I was edgy and irritated.
I’m not used to recon anymore after running anti recon titles most of the time last year.

I’m even considering running Regen as a fourth title. I’ll probably upgrade AL once Genesis: Ascension is released. Then I’ll integrate Anti Recon additionally to its own Anti Recon.

09.01.2026
Friday
3:00 of KB1, QL1, Ascendet Love (AL)
Decided to reduce the length due to the strong recon I experienced the last couple of days.

Jan 11

10.01.2026
Saturday
3:00 of KB1, QL1, Ascendet Love (AL)

Speaking of recon, I thought I listened on Thursday not Friday.

But the recon yesterday was much better.

I have to say, I love my custom Ascendet Love. Especially the combination of Emotions Unfettered, I AM ATMAN and Way of Understanding delivers immediate hits.

I felt exhausted the last couple of weeks, but only now I start to understand everything, me being overwhelmed with taking care of everything, keeping the house working and alive.
It finally gives me the possibility to start taking care of myself as well.

Jan 14

13.01.2026
Tuesday
3:00 of KB1, QL1, Ascendet Love (AL)

Oh, my, what a ride.
It’s Wednesday morning.
Woke up at 5:30. Now it’s an hour later.
Had a dream.
Now, so much clicked.
Ascendet Love kicks ass.

I feel like all human love is transactional, conditinal.

I had the impulse to simply grab my bag and join the Carthusians. God is the only source of unconditional love.

Everyone else wants, demands something in exchange for their love.

I need to be functional for them.

If I can’t be functional I feel rejected. Like No one loves me for who I am.

And I don’t think this is recon. This is finally a deeper understanding of what’s going on in me.

And whatever I do for dopamine (gaming, tv shows, social media, even porn) is doing something where I don’t feel rejected.

Fucking Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria.
.
.
.

Interesting observation
The last couple of days my fingers seemed unable to hit the right letters on my phone.
My spelling was so off, that often even autocorrect was overtaxed and didn’t know what I meant. And often I didn’t neither when I checked what I wrote.
This morning it’s gone back to normal.

Jan 16

15.01.2026
Thursday
3:00 of KB1, QL1, Ascendet Love (AL)

Today I realized that I feel quite taxed in the mornings when I wake up.
This is similar to two years ago when I started Khan Black 1, but in a much smaller scale. The last time, I felt like a truck hit me and my feet aches so much that I feared falling down the stairs. Now it’s just a bit of grogginess and needing longer to become fully awake.
Two years ago this feeling vanished after 2.5 cycles.
So I guess KB is working on some energetic limitations again. This time deeper and the limitations aren’t that strong.

I also had longer conversation with Gemini about my stack and my goals and if it would be better to switch out KB for Regeneration.
According to Gemini at least, Ascendet Love is already covering most angles I’d like Regeneration to work on.

As I mentioned in a post above, I came to believe that one of my biggest hindrances is my RSD. Firstly what it does to me socially but also because it’s the main reason I need dopamine to cope with the RSD generated pain.

Lovebomb, Pride Unbroken, Divine Self image, Emotions Unfettered and Way of Understanding (in Ascendet Love) should handle this, though without anti recon scripting.

But I plan to update AL once Genesis: Ascension is released. Then it will include Anti Recon Scripting, Regneration or Essence: Inner Spa and some other modules.

Jan 17

I don’t know what this is.
Emotions unfettered probably.
I feel overwhelmed.
I was walking on my gums, as we say in German.
For months now.
But I only realized how bad it was last week.
After taking up Ascendet Love again.

Now, I realize at a bigger scale what’s going on in me. I can’t keep it deep down anymore.
I feel very emotional.

But not only that. Suddenly I have this brain fuck my fiancee talks about all the time. When I try to sleep, my thoughts wander around. All things I kept off my thoughts for years suddenly pop up. Things I was easily able to ignore for years.

Also, I was just smoking a cigarette at the open window. And it was devastating. All the noise. Cars, honking, a chainsaw, a tractor, everything at once. That too, I never noticed before. I was able to hear it consciously, but now it streams unfiltered into my mind. It’s tiring.

Since I work at the gas station, I regularly bring leftovers like bread rolls, donuts, sandwiches, etc. Mostly for our chickens, but I also eat the stuff I like that is still good to eat. The stuff we don’t like, I place next to the stairs so my uncle can feed it to the chickens.
Yesterday, there were great things left, stuff I really like. Like an italian Chickenburger, Tramezzini, a few Burgers…
I placed it where I always place it. It it never got taken. But when I wanted to grab the chickenburger today, the whole bag was missing.
After searching everywhere, I asked my uncle, for whom I’ve just cooked lunch, where it is. He fed it all to the chickens. There are five bags still in the basement, waiting to get fed. But he feeds them the fresh stuff I didn’t place next to the stairs.
Something exploded in me.
I was angry, pissed, annoyed.

This was the first time, I consciously came aware of the pain I was feeling. How I needed Dopamin to ease the pain. I wanted a sexual release for the Dopamin. But being close, I realized that it would do nothing.

It’s crazy what is going on in me since I started AL again.

Jan 26

17, 19, 22, 24 January 2026
3mins of KB1, QL1 and AL

Things got better.
The hypersensitivity is gone.
And I can talk more openly about my emotions.
That gave more depth to my relationship as well.
Seems like, both my fiancee and I, made the same mistake: Keeping our struggles to ourselves because we see the other has already enough to carry. Not seeing that the other is already carrying our burden with us, even when we keep it inside. The other can still feel it. And not speaking about it adds to the burden.
So we took half a day off and just spent it talking in a nice cafe.

I can still feel the corporal recon from KB1. It’s similar to two years ago, only lighter and maybe changed by QL1. I’m not sure if QL1 produces corporal recon since I’ve never ran it alone.

Nights are kinda hard. I wake up often, sweat a lot. I need around an hour to be fully awake. And I’m phlegmy right after getting up.

This morning I woke up with wood. Didn’t happen in a few weeks. Did KB1 break a certain barrier?

Wednesday after work, 11pm, I witnessed a car crash. The driver probably fell asleep, drifted to the other side of the road, woke up, panicking pulled right, but much to strong. Hit the guard rail where it went into the ground. That sent him flying like a corkscrew.
I was shocked. Wanted to call 911 only to realize that we have a different emergency number. While talking to the police, another rlpoloce car arrived and took over. Thankfully he was on his way to our gas station where we have troubles with the alarm system.
Barely slept that night. Even now, I still feel my heartbeat rising when I pass the crash site.
But it’s getting better.

Oh, and I started to use 10 seconds of EE in the mornings irregularly.

Jan 27

01.27.2026
Tuesday
Listening day 10
4 minutes of QL1, KB1 and AL

I aimed for 3:30 but ended up with 4 minutes.

Got a bit recon, if this is recon.
I felt incredibly stressed at a point.
Lot of worries coming up.
Will go down to 3:30 next listening day.

And I just realized that I’m using old titles, so the old listening pattern still applies.

So one more listening day before 5 day mini washout.

Jan 29

01.29.2026
Thursday
Listening Day 11
4 minutes of QL1 & KB1, 3:30 of AL

Had severe headache this morning after shoveling snow. Felt like recon. Even had to burp.

These titles work hard in me.

So I wanted to go down with exposure, but with QL1 I looked at the time and thought I have another 30 seconds until 4 minutes. Wasn’t thinking straight.
With KB1 I aimed for 3:30 but didn’t activate the timer and noticed only after 4 minutes.
But I think the emotional recon is mostly from AL. And I didn’t exceed listening time.

Since I’m not using the new schedule I could vary with listening times. So maybe I’ll try longer times with KB1 and QL1. Let’s see if I get harder recon next cycle.

Jan 30

I just realized a few things.
I take care of myself more intensely.
I started to brush my teeth again before sleeping (that was long time next to impossible for my ADHD self).
I wash my face before sleeping and apply night cream with an anti aging serum (I’m turning 36 soon, but usually get the “Oh, I wouldn’t have thought that” despite my overweight adding a couple of years).
In the mornings I used to get up and make my grandma breakfast and then take a shower later in the day. Sometimes before noon, often after noon.
The shower thing didn’t change, but I wash my face, my armpits, take a deodorant, brush my teeth right after getting up.

These are huge successes for me.
May be Lovebomb, maybe in tandem with Divine Self-Image, Pride unbroken and Apollon unbound.

I’m even considering taking up face yoga.

Feb 3

Had my second Prana Seminar this weekend.
Very enlightening. I learned so much.
And I will take up meditation.
Need to take up meditation.
It’s already easier than it used to be, now I just need the discipline or self-love to actually do it.
But since Saturday, my nights are turbulent.
I wake up a lot, sweat a lot. My pillow was soaked Monday morning.
I’m not sure if this is from prana work or from KB1. But they kinda work on similar topics. My energetic build.

Tomorrow I’ll start my next cycle.

Feb 4

Speaking of Prana and taking up meditation, I just realized how much Revelation of Spirit with Spiritual Reality Alignment changed my life in the past couple of months.
A year ago, I knew I had a huge spiritual core that was buried under loads of trauma and worldly challenges.
Running RoS for three months unearthed this core. I’m praying now everyday again, feel myself connected to God, my higher self, the spiritual realm.
A year ago, I didn’t know what to make out of my Catholic past and my more recent spiritual experiences.
Now, they aren’t completely understood, but they form a harmonious union in me.
My mother’s illness led me to Pranic Healing, which then opened my eyes to the spiritual world again that is much vaster than I imagined.
What seemed like miracles, you read about in books, is now part of my everyday life.

I don’t know what my life will bring in the next couple of months of even years, but I trust in God and his divine providence.

I can’t tell what subs I will use in the future because there are lots of uncertainties.
But it looks more and more like it, that I will do a full run of KB followed by Alchemist.
Alchemist alone sounds dope right now. I can’t imagine how my life will unfold when I take up a regular spiritual practice and then add Alchemist.
After that I seriously consider running AEON.
I’ll then have the basics (KB 2x and Alchemist + a spiritual practice) to do so.
I plan to give up smoking again, soon, this time for good. LB alone is a huge support in this, Ardent Light as well. I even plan to cut out pork and reduce meat in general. Even if I don’t understand how I could be healthy longtime without proper protein and fat.
So when I reach the end of AEON, I can’t imagine what it will have done with me.

And it all started with RoS, which I didn’t even notice while running it.

Feb 6 posted this in the Paragon Thread by Accident

05.02.2025
Cycle 2
Listening Day 1
Paragon 3:00 AL 3:30 KB1 4:00

Paragon puts me in a tight spot. Discovering the effect on my prefrontal cortex lead me to using it.
But I have a full 3 stack already.
Do I pause QL1 or switch those two every cycle until I make them into a custom?
Just checked today, the custom would cost me 177€, so it’s doable. I’m only waiting for the release of the Experimental Adaptability Module.
If it’s necessary with the new Paragon in the custom. I have an open ticket about this question.

Since I’ve been back on ‘Ascended Love’ since the beginning of the year, for a few days now, I’ve been consciously noticing when I’m stressed. It’s not perfect yet, but in the past, when my fiancée told me I was stressed, I’d always deny it because I simply couldn’t perceive it consciously.

For example, today I was grocery shopping under a bit of time pressure. I darted through a massive supermarket to find everything on my list as quickly as possible, rushed to another store and the bank, and made it back home in a record time of 74 minutes. On the drive home, I realized just how stressed I actually was—I’d rate my internal stress level at a 10/10.
I did a short meditative exercise to let the stress drain away, and afterwards, it felt like it was down to a 3 or 4. However, when I asked my fiancée, she said she still perceived me at a 7.

This leads me to believe that I’m not yet sensitive enough to perceive stress when it’s below a certain threshold (like 3-4).
Then tonight at the gas station, I fell back into my usual hyperfocus combined with time blindness. Instead of completing my tasks in a timely manner, I spent my time on my phone and ended up having to rush through the final hour.

My internal stress level hit a 10 again. This made me wonder: Am I subconsciously creating this stress for myself because I actually need it? But if so, for what? Does stress trigger a dopamine release?

I think this panic, born from procrastination, and the success of finishing my work in time gives me a huge dopamine burst.
But that’s not really good. Slowly I start to realize that I’m burning myself by keeping the engine in the red the whole time.

But thanks to this new development, I start to notice my stress. And over time, I think, I’ll be able to notice this better and better until I’m able to prevent it. This seeing my Stresslevel the first time in my life (as far as I can remember) is a invaluable first step.

Edit

Lol. This was meant to go into my Journal

Feb 7

07.02.2025
Cycle 2
Listening Day 2
Paragon 1:00 AL 4:00 KB1 4:00

Today I realized that I’m getting more tips recently. People round up more often.

I even met a customer whole grocery shopping and we talked a bit. He asked me if I’d work that day. I declined and said I’d work the next day.
He then said, if he can manage, he’ll wait gassing up until then.
He actually showed up during my shift. He then asked me, if I still have a five cent/liter coupon. He than allowede me to cash it in for me. Another 2€.

Also more people only want full euros back. Like the price is 4.48€ and they say “make it five”.

This happened every now and then, but atm it happens a couple of times per shift.

Might be Lovebomb. There’s nothing else in my stack that would cause this, afaik.

Edit

Also worth mentioning.
Today, I didn’t like to do my face routine before going to sleep. But I didn it never the less.

Also I wanted to drink a beer in the hours before going to bed. But after giving this some thought, I decided against it.

This might be a combination of AL and reading the new Listening instructions mentioning taking small actions to reinforce change.

Feb 8

Today we went to a cafe we visited two weeks ago.
The first time I felt like I needed to leave my car key with the staff as security when we went outside for a smoke.
Today it felt natural to just tell them we’re just going outside for a smoke and then we’ll be back.

Wonder what that is.
Pride unbroken?

I feel like I seem more trustworthy.
Ascension?

Nevertheless, I will record these small things to boost results, as mentioned in the new listening instructions.

Only, right now, it still feels like a step back to only use two titles on a given listening day.
To have to split them up.

I know that integration is just as important as listening. So why do I still cling to more exposure?

Is it still the old notion of “the more the better”?

I trust Saint and Fire. And when they tell us, that we don’t need maximum exposure, but the right amount of exposure to reach our goals, I believe them. Intellectually.
But it feels like deep down, I still cling to the more the better.

---

Just had a big realization.
I experienced rejection today.
At least I experienced some reactions I would have interpreted in the past as being a rejection.
But today I realized that it has nothing to do with me, but with the person’s own internal struggles.

So it seems like my Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria is healing.

Feb 11 - Contains the Lapis Exilis Modules

11.02.2025
Cycle 2
Listening Day 3
Paragon 3:00 AL 4:00 KB1 4:00

Totally skipped two days.
Even today it took some determination to listen to the subs.
And I feel Paragon in my pfc already after a few minutes.

I’m working on my anti ADHD custom diligently.
The plan is almost done. Waiting on an answer from someone then I’m gonna order it.

Ordered it. Even before finishing the post I got the answer.

Here it is:

1. Quantum Limitless Stage 1
   Best for ADHD Matters according to Support and Gemini because it’s a complete rework or the wiring and everything in the brain
2. New Paragon
   Simply because I felt it work in my brain so fast
3. New Physical Shifting Experience
4. SPS: Nervous System
5. SPS: Endocrine System
6. SPS: Digestive System
   Nutrients and the digestive system is the second brain
7. Dopaminergic Revival
   Most messed up thing in my brain
8. Epigenetics and DNA Modulator
   ADHD is hereditary and my whole family shows traits
9. Pragya
   Brain
10. Synergy: Preordained Vitality
    “my whole family shows traits” → radiant health
11. Deus
    To make it stronger, more efficient over time
12. Experimental ZPU Anti Recon
13. Experimental Adaptive Scripting

Maybe it’s here before my birthday on Sunday

Feb 12

Just reread the description of Venus Unveiled iny Ascendet Love booklet.

After running the custom for 6 weeks now, I can understand the description much better.

Also I found quite a few incidents where I actively noticed it’s effects.

As I mentioned above, one customer I met while shopping timed his next stop at the gas station to meet me and give me 2€ tip.

Another customer told me, I have such a special aura that he feels wonderful in my presence and he usuylly stayed for quite some time to talk.

Seems like Chosen of Venus Aura.

[Parsifal]

13.02.2025
Cycle 2
Listening Day 4
AL 3:30 KB1 3:30

Dropped Paragon for the day, hoping to get my LX custom delivered till Sunday.
Also I reduced the listening time to reduce the physical recon like extrem sweating during the night an waking up pretty often.

As I said, I read the description of Synergy: Venus Unveiled again and noticed that I absolutely love this module.
I guess I mostly feel Chosen of Venus consciously at the moment.
Yesterday one of my colleagues mentioned that I seem so happy and loving at work and that I seem to love my work.
It’s not that I love my job. But I don’t detest it anymore as I did in the past.

Recently I started to a investigate a bit how a gas station actually makes money. And it was shocking. My main work (besides cleaning) is seeling gas and cigarettes. But that actually doesn’t bring much money. We earn 1c per liter and 20c for one pack of cigarettes. The biggest part of the money goes straight to the government (like 60-70%). So if I sell 1000 liters of gas and 50 packs of cigarettes, that’s barely more than I cost my boss in one hour. That’s all just to draw in customers and sell them coffee, drinks, sandwiches, snacks etc. which pay my salary.

I understand my boss now much better.
Might be Way of Understanding.

I need to write a few reviews for my favorite modules and what they did in my life.

[Risky]

Do share your custom modules

[Parsifal]

@Risky

Do share your custom modules

For Lapis Exilis? See two posts above

@Parsifal

Feb 11 - Contains the Lapis Exilis Modules

11.02.2025

[…]

I’m working on my anti ADHD custom diligently.
The plan is almost done. Waiting on an answer from someone then I’m gonna order it.

Ordered it. Even before finishing the post I got the answer.

Here it is:

1. Quantum Limitless Stage 1
   Best for ADHD Matters according to Support and Gemini because it’s a complete rework or the wiring and everything in the brain
2. New Paragon
   Simply because I felt it work in my brain so fast
3. New Physical Shifting Experience
4. SPS: Nervous System
5. SPS: Endocrine System
6. SPS: Digestive System
   Nutrients and the digestive system is the second brain
7. Dopaminergic Revival
   Most messed up thing in my brain
8. Epigenetics and DNA Modulator
   ADHD is hereditary and my whole family shows traits
9. Pragya
   Brain
10. Synergy: Preordained Vitality
    “my whole family shows traits” → radiant health
11. Deus
    To make it stronger, more efficient over time
12. Experimental ZPU Anti Recon
13. Experimental Adaptive Scripting

Ascendet Love

Ascendet Love: Inner Spa - this one is still in the planning phase. Right now, I tend more towards Inner Spa then Regeneration, but a lot of things might change until I order it.

[Risky]

Thank you for indulging me

[Parsifal]

15.02.1990
AL 4:30 KB1 4:30 RICH 0:05

I’ve sneaked in a few seconds of New RICH every listening day (like 5-10 seconds).

Results
My boss asked me, if I would work part time instead of Minijob for a couple of months.
She just needs time to find someone new.
But I was sceptical.
At home I checked in with Gemini about my concerns and my intuition was right.
If I would agree to go part-time minimum wage we would drop out of social support/ basic income. That would mean, I’d have to pay for my fiancees health insurance.
In total I would work double of what I work now and in result would have 150€ less than now.

And that’s beside the fact that taking care of my grandmother and mother is already straining enough with my ADHD brain.

[Parsifal]

17.02.2026
Cycle 2
Listening Day 6
AL 5:00 KB1 5:00 Rich 0:05

I sleep a lot better recently. The excessive sweating is gone, I still wake up a couple of times a night, but today, I didn’t wake up because I needed to pee despite emptying my last beer before lent before sleeping. And I didn’t even go to toilet before sleeping.
So I see this as a milestone.

18.02.2026
Lapis Exilis (LX) 0:15
So this is the morning after, the 18th, and after waking up, I found I finally received my custom

So I listened anyways for 15 seconds.

---

Update

I just realized that the last to days were marked by boredom. I’ve caught up with all interesting threads in the forum, caught up with the Telegram channels, read books, but still feel bored.
There’s enough stuff I should do, but instead I’m bored and can’t get myself to do that much. Or at least I could do a lot more.
Either this is a new level of understanding myself, or this a different effect of my custom, or it’s recon.
May also be caused by knowing that I don’t have to work at the gas station for a couple of days. So some pressure I had before is gone.

Boredom… Wtf?

[Parsifal]

Thanks to @Malkuth I’ve just found this Paragraph with RICHs copy

Use it with spiritual titles to align wealth-building with your highest purpose and deepest wisdom.

Since RoS will drop sooner or later, and I considered to run it for some time again, perhaps after KB1 replacing it until the update drops, I now asked myself if I should build a spiritual wealth custom?

Working title is "The Mystic Dragons Lair"

1. RICH

2. Revelation of Spirit

3. Aura

4. One purpose

5. Alexandria
   Maybe

6. Synergy Inescapable Gaze
   Probably only Awakened Perception

7. Arcane Mastery

8. Avatar

9. Cashflow Catalyst

10. Synergy the golden one
    Might be unnecessary with RICH

11. Synergy energetic transcendence
    It has more modules than I’d like it to have, but a few that I want.

12. Formless Clarity
    Looks interesting

13. Inner Gasoline
    Would be especially interesting after KB

14. Mystic osmosis

15. Omni dimensional

16. Heaven Shaking Power

17. Sam//Vana

18. Synergy: Wonders of Life
    Love this module

19. Spiritual Reality Alignment
    Have it in me NE RoS

20. Synergy: 42

Just 20 modules is much to dense. Also there are next to none wealth modules in here, only spirituality.

And a few advanced modules I’m not sure about (Sam//Vana, 42).

But thank God, RoS’ drop is still a while out, so I don’t have to decide anything yet.

---

Edit:
Saint just casually mentioned that two core name embedded are a thing for now. So maybe that’s the best option. No choosing of modules, no cutting of fluff, just the two cores I desire.

[Parsifal]

[FREE UPGRADE] Main Disc. Thread - The NEW Paragon -- Now Available!

Had my first 15sec loop of my Paragon/QL1 custom. I noticed a distinct pressure behind my PFC soon after. If I interpret it correctly, it’s either the Gyrus Cingulum (emotions, pain, motivation) or the Rostrum in the corpus callosum (connecting the PFC to the rest of the brain). Either way, I interpret it as a good sign. I also had a piercing pain in the knee I twisted 6 years ago, dancing RocknRoll. I hope it’s a sign that my body is tackling this issue now.

[Parsifal]

19.02.2026
Cycle 2
Listening Day 7
AL 5:30 KB1 5:00 LX 1:00
Listened before going to bed/writing this

Today was a strange day.
I woke up three hours early and couldn’t fall asleep again. Then I was tired the whole day.

But what was strange is that I felt a serious depression today. Did next to nothing.

The whole evening I spent in bed solving nonograms and watching moonshiners.
And I didn’t feel happy or relaxed like I usually did when did this comfort routine.

Today is the first day of lent. Since I might be prediabetic, I decided to do 8/16 interval fasting, cutting alcohol and reducing refined carbs like in sugar, wheat, junkfood etc.

I think LX should help here as well with Paragon, Endocrine System etc.

But a big source of dopamine is gone.

This might be a factor.

It also feels like recon.

It feels like something huge is being worked on.

When @CurlyGirl found me, we talked about my feelings and it helped. She then wanted to do a ritual we have. Everytime she finds kinda deep questions from relationship coaches on social media, we use them to depend our relationship.
This time, there were 6 questions and we needed about an hour to get through.
Partially because they really went deep. Partially because my ADHD brain thinks to complex for these skins if questions and I first needed to clarify what exactly is asked.

---

Update
The next day.
I slept really well. Surprisingly.
My bad mood is gone. Completely.

I feel more driven to get stuff done today.

Also I feel a slight pressure in the whole of my head. Still not really unpleasant, but stronger than it used to be.

[Parsifal]

No subs today. Still headache.

@Parsifal

The day before yesterday I jumped to 1 minute with my Paragon Custom.
Wasn’t the best idea.
Yesterday I had a constant pressure in my head.
Nothing to extreme most of the time.
But at night, I wanted to tackle an important task I was procrastinating on. And the pressure grew into a serious headache.
After I decided to do it the next day (today) the headache vanished within an hour.
Today it’s kinda here. Kinda not.
It’s popping up on my radar and then it’s gone again. Strange headache.
The pressure is still constant so I will not listen to subs today.

I see this as a prove of what Saint meant when he talked about ZPU being much stronger than ZPv2. And why we need to adapt the progressive microloop protocol.
Not to keep us small but to assure a safe development and a steady progress.

I have one ZPU preview custom in my stack.
One NSE Custom, and one before NSE but ZP title.

(Plus tiny snippets of RICH every now and then)

And still I felt depressed the day before yesterday and headache starting late yesterday.

These titles are no joke.
With ZPU being close to completion, we, I, need to be careful with exposure. It’s better to err on the side of caution than to drown in recon.

Or maybe, just maybe, this headache is actually LX doing it’s work iny brain. I can’t tell.

[Parsifal]

I killed Behemoth today.

My phone provider fucked up and I got a dunning letter.

I could have done something about it earlier, but ADHD, and I did my part. They fucked up.

So I wrote (@CurlyGirl wrote the first draft) a letter of dispute. Packed with all the facts and paragraphs.

I’m done playing nice. I’m done kowtowing.
I’ve lifted long enough full of fear.
Not anymore.
I’m not gonna let anyone bully me around anymore.

Maybe my subconscious even stopped me earlier from tackling it so I can consciously learn that I can go through this shit, my head held high.

Never done something like this.
Proud of my self.

[Parsifal]

Stayed awake until 3:30 after this.
Totally lost track of time on insta.
The algorithm really got me this time. I think I’ve sent my fiancee 25 reels or so.
I’m experimenting a bit with psi since my birthday. I’ve seen so many fascinating videos in this topic.

BUT the craziest thing happened afterwards.
I dreamed that I can fly.
Not the, for me, usual levitation and making elongated jumps.
No. I was flying like Superman. Ok, not that crazy.
Not like through the clouds. But so high that people became small