I find myself in the process of, in various ways, transitioning from a lack- or dearth-based orientation to a resourcefulness/resourced-orientation.
It’s not about ego or self-aggrandizement; it’s about recognition.
Many things that I had not realized or recognized were resources, ARE resources.
But it’s not as simple as a mantra repetition. It’s a change in the physical configuration of how you orient, and ‘incline’ and connect towards, the world.
It’s a consciousness-level change; in addition to everything else.
And it also involves certain subtle, internal strengthenings; like tendon strengthenings.
By some strange chance, and with the words, ‘This is yours! Live with it!’, you find yourself dropped in the midst of a madly rushing river, and you are immediately knocked down, painfully scraping your shins and bumping your arms and body against the rocks. Worse still, you are gulping in a bit of syrupy and harsh tasting liquid, and are struggling to make sure that you do not drown in this river.
Then something shifts.
By fortune, by luck, by resilience and determination, or some aught else; you begin to find some balance. You still fall, but you stop cursing fate and work on regaining your stance. It’s not some Hollywood training montage, but you do get better at it. You find a branch to grab onto and that helps as well. It’s pretty difficult; but your mindset is shifting, and you basically don’t have time or room to really lean into despairing.
Just about this time, you start to notice a certain dark viscosity to the water. This makes you curious, and you begin to explore and investigate it. You follow it back, against the flow of the river. It’s tough going, but, let’s be honest, at this particular moment, you don’t have much else to do. You’re in this river, and for now, you have to find a way to live in it and with it.
So you take the time to start looking around, and following that viscosity upstream, you realize that it’s a spring of oil. And it’s yours. It’s flowing with such force that it’s clearly deep and copious.
And this is step one. It will take much longer for you to learn the necessary skills and build the right relationships to harness it well. And you, being a sovereign spirit, do not intend to worship and enslave yourself to this resource, so you will also need to decide how to fit it into YOUR life, rather than contorting yourself into its. You realize for example, that with this resource, you’ll be able to bring electricity and enhanced resources to poor schools in your area that you have always wished to support.
In the end, what seemed like a punishment or a sentence turned out to be an empowerment. But the trick is this: it really was a punishment, a burden, and a sentence. You were not wrong about that. But it was not ONLY a burden.
This is what I am experiencing, noting, and contemplating.