The Dice of Reality

Journals - Custom Subliminals
#89
GG Results

First was revisiting and expanding my previous sub experiences.

Then giving me more access to those aspects of myself, at will.

Then, guidance on stack plan, skincare, gym, healthcare, work and general lifestyle balance; putting out some immediate issues.

Then re-introduction/recognition of paradox in my dreams and daily life.

Then energetic expansion.

Then now layers of awareness.

It’s been back to back streams of insights along with organic implementation and I’m not even sure it’s been up to a month.

I’m supposed to be studying but I can’t help this excitement. I don’t even want to imagine what four months down the line with this looks like.

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#91

ASBR 00:05, Wanted 00:05

Another successful round of interview. However for some reason I’m angry, very angry.

There’s a constant desire to reject this potential opportunity, despite the opportunity not having fully unveiled itself, simply because what has been revealed doesn’t completely align with my plans.

Then there’s impatience for more results, for the point where I can confidently say there is no difference between me and the me I intend to embody this season.

Actually, I feel incomplete and I desperately want to be complete.

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#92

If you had the gift to find your way towards a goal, not just once, but forever, would you take it?

So many things to accomplish, to do, to experience, too little time.

Who would have thought expanding the timeframe would come with more problems to grow through?

Almost like patience is never enough.

I think I might need another walk.

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#93

Perhaps, I can expand my time to the max. However, that’s putting the cart before the horse.

How can you scale when there is no structure? I mean you aren’t using what you have properly.

What will you do with that extra time?

That’s asking for new problems to grow through, when I haven’t even cleared my table. An endless recursion.

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#94

My answer is yes, no buts, no more questions. Gain the ability to not just see structure but create it, to live it, at will. The ability to ignite momentum even when everything is razed to the ground. Do that once and the rest of it is history, only adaptation will remain.

Somehow, this is still related to rejection to sacrifice. One borne of impatience and perceived lack of abundance. It’s coming together already, but I won’t express it yet.

Realization dropped almost immediately, now waiting for my being to actually catch up.

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#95

Besides the recon filled day that was yesterday, here are some updates

Dominance

The dominance from ASBR is blending into something more primal, almost Khan like.

However, I’m certain this is ASBR because the essence is different from that of Khan, this is something closer to a sense of exclusivity—one among others, yet set apart for excellence and radiance.

Romance

With the dominance readjusting now, the attraction hits are coming in and they seem more like pure attraction. Also getting a very strong push to approach, even in recon.

With such internal focus on vision and success, most people can’t fathom the potential and vision you hold, something deemed impossible and tied to a lot of deep subconscious structures. .

Just your presence triggers something very innate relating to success in them, which is very hard to spot and easier for them to avoid by subconsciously interpreting it as a repulsion/loss of attraction.

Without the ancillary effects of fame and popularity, it takes a very specific type of person to resonate in a purely romantic sense, someone with a configuration for grand vision and success in some form, even if they’re not conscious of it.

There’s only one such person I’ve encountered like that, she approached me first, out of the blue and kept coming back, which was interesting, especially when others were repelled. She’s not like how the classic “elite” is portrayed but her vibe is almost like she has success and wealth flowing through her veins.

I’m guessing this is why some users struggled to fully express ASBR standalone in romantic contexts.

Internal State

ASBR is really dominating here, but it seems like it’s being reinterpreted. There’s a softening going on. Which is very much welcomed.

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Main Disc. Thread -- A Stark Black Reality (Now Available!)
#96

This is basically the same guy wearing a different disguise.

Now, I understand why my wall was working on overtime. Same thing as last time, but I chose to ignore it. Not this time.

On the next level, I’m going to request for clarity from the get go, and if something as basic as that can’t be provided, I’m out the door.

#97

I think for me, I might also be unintentionally projecting my personal standards onto other people. It’s the first thing I noticed on Inner Circle and immediately started fixing. You holding yourself to some standard will always reflect itself onto other people, at least a little. Since the self-critic you have will also be there when other people do things. Since it’ll probably always exist in some form, I’m trying to at least hide it under layers of easygoingness so that’s what’ll primarily interact with the other person.

I’m hoping IC puts me around some people like this. It’s so nice being equals or worse than your friends/partner because it literally forces you to level up to match them. Virtually everyone I’ve manifested I’ve grown away from feeling like we weren’t really compatible anymore.

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#98

The projection of personal standards is really real. I’ve noticed mine for a while now and I’ve tried to use the same solution as you—easygoingness. Unfortunately, it made me feel like a dancing clown, which caused a significant amount of recon on Khan St2. I wasn’t genuine to myself and others.

I found that it doesn’t work and I genuinely have to move to a state where I like people and find them fascinating for me to socially open up, even if the projection is still going on. More like I see the flaws and love them regardless.

In relation to romance, I was mostly looking at it from the perspective of why most previous form of attraction suddenly gets disconnected, like they just lose interest in you, something @praisetheurdtree also experienced moving between WB and ASBR.

But experiencing more of how the subconscious and reality works a bit more, I can bet the projection plays into it, combined with the intense focus, there’s a possibility of subconsciously disqualifying them from participating in your reality in a romantic sense or them picking it up energetically and then disqualifying themselves.

Also, it’s hard to see someone that “judges” (on something as deep as success) you in way, as attractive.

Also, how’s your experience been on IC?

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#99

I’m trying to gamify it a bit more, kind of taking the perspective that I don’t care if they’re disqualified, they just failed some hidden reality game. I got hit hard yesterday with the easygoing bit betraying my truer personality.

IC is nice, it’s feeling a little freeing. Partly because it’s getting used to help with the social stuff and helping me find what I don’t really care about. Might be working with ASBR a bit since I feel like the effort and work required for things come naturally now, so I genuinely do get to care less. Manifestations are pretty good, so I don’t really want to drop it since those are another benefit. Eventually I’ll probably throw them in a long-term custom together that I run alongside whatever else my stack is.

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#100

I always looked up, ahead, considering that my current situation wasn’t permanent, insignificant compared to the grand vision I always had.

With such perspective, sacrificing the thing that don’t matter is only natural, right?

However, how isn’t it important? In this case, what is being sacrificed isn’t drag, but the present moment itself. There’s a difference and that’s one personally misunderstood for all my life.

One is letting go of what no longer serves, the other not living at all, embodying the disposition that nothing else will matter once growth comes.

I never truly consolidated, never owned, embodied, received or accepted whatever was given to me.

And then it’s a wonder why letting go was virtually impossible.

It’s like good food you’ve always desired and needed is offered, every time, but each time, it’s never tasted, in an attempt at delayed gratification.

And then you try to bin everything, with the intent to set up a better table? Even if the current table is what paves the way for the next one?

What utter bullshit!!! What happens if the next table is set?

You can’t get to the future without living through the present. The same way you can never truly receive more without being a good steward, and, you can never learn to steward without first receiving.

How do you expect to trade with one face of a coin?

Reality has played its card before you, perhaps, it always did.

As the Dice Man, what hand will you show us?

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#101

GG 1:00, Wanted 00:30 on 17/04/26

General

Wanted still remains the best social sub for me and combined with ASBR, there is only one description— unstopable magnetic flow. and it’s beginning to veer close to seduce reality territory Attention flows wherever I go, my presence becomes more akin to a blessing.

Unsurprisingly, I’m becoming more comfortable with it. In the energetic sense, I’m getting a hang of “opening up and letting the celebrity effect flow” because I’m having way more experiences that help me practice more frequently. Exactly what I need.

About two weeks ago I was much more predisposed to staying “closed” even though I could “open” up.

Wealth

Regarding this

Turned it down and did it with grace. I’m filled with gratitude that I can turn down an opportunity because of an lack of alignment and I didn’t appreciate the other party wanting to be treated like a god. Wrong person.

Romance

Previous romantic interest been acting up recently. Making “unobvious” attempts to get me to engage her again. Can’t really blame her though, it’s me we’re talking about here.

On another note, arousal is through the roof, almost constantly, regardless of engagement. It’s to the point where I have to negotiate with my erections so I don’t have to worry in public spaces.

Others

With regards to my stack I’m pondering a choice between majors or customs that give more specificity

Also, there still seems to be a need for something that gives me more agency in terms of “driving” the social/communication aspects. Like DD:TS or S&S

Ascension: St1 is a big contender to break my stack. It’s direct script base for my overall focus now but the trade-off being that momentum and familiarity with ASBR is cut.

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#102

There is no such thing as control
In actuality what we have is structure, the ability to create frameworks which reality flows through towards an outcome. Any form of action is still a part of a framework.

Going one step further, the framework isn’t even yours, it belongs to reality. You were just able to make use of it and props to you if you truly see it. If you can identify a pattern, then you didn’t create it.

Nothing created, nothing destroyed. All that will ever be, already is. And true control remains an illusion.

Do you see?

At the end of it all, are we just conduits?

Then what exactly is The Will to Power?

And what is time?

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#103

Its not my fault if you get a “not accurate” impression of me

Something I’ve been subconsciously scared of is people getting the wrong impression, without me intentionally making it so—people thinking I’m angry, I hate them, or I have a thing for them. The deeper part is I know how they will react/interpret my actions most of the time, which contributed to this.

EDIT: Taking it another step, I always saw myself as a guide, and in a sense responsible for other’s experience. So more regulation was added.

I consciously understand the nuances of projection to an extent, but my way of being is now catching up.

This brings more understanding to why I know what to say/do when communicating, but still feel blocked from executing, which was one of the reasons I made my Dragon’s Pact custom.

From now on, I will express myself as I please. If it comes to mind, I express. If I notice a hold back, I still express regardless.

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#104

I’m very much one of the boys, just as I’m very much one of the girls

The level of comfort, treatment and inner world reflects similarly in both cases. Things that are only expressed/reflected if either cases were true are gradually becoming normal.

My ability to express myself and communicate in both situations, which actually fits both, while still remaining myself is improving.

This is like an expansion pack which unveils a unique placement that has always been present, but only expressed in moments where I accepted myself as truly free (happens on both Primal & Wanted)

It feels androgynous in a way, but masculine androgynous?

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#105

I guess so

An ode to the human trait of self-actualization, a desire to be complete, often misinterpreted as greatness that stands distinguished by human standards.

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#106

Paragon 00:30
For preventive measure, started falling sick.

On DoR, it felt more like I was being taught and shown things, most felt very exclusive and some of them I didn’t understand.

On GG, I still don’t feel any difference, like I’m not using a sub, yet results keep popping. I’m very certain there’s something useful happening here, I just don’t know what it is, yet.
Perception

It feels like a combination of both realization and unfolding. The more I see, the more things open up and versa. Just observing alone makes it feel halfway integrated, this way integration is very quick and mostly don’t have to be conscious

No perceptual shift, cognitive or sensory enhancement. However, mental feed and processing are clearer and more stable. It’s not forced, or comes as an information dump, it’s more like a stream that actually never stops flowing.

Sometimes it flows under a cave sometimes on level ground where I can see, other times even into deeper waters. It speeds up at some points and slows down at others. The most influence I have here is focusing on the top layers of the stream to let other layers slip into the background.

I feel like a sailor with a vessel that can double as a submarine when needed.

Coupled with the extreme time dilation I just experienced while sleeping. And they all feel absolutely normal.

I think it’s geared towards optimizing the use of what is already present, rather than increasing more capacity

Energy

I don’t feel any energetic difference yet, in terms of tiring less, more drive, sensitivity or energy regulation, like on KB. I actually find that I need more sleep, way more than I thought I needed and I still get hungry.

However, I feel an uncanny expansion in both aura and state. Like they don’t need to spread outside of me, it stays inside and the environment adjusts to it instead.

It’s possible this might be a reinterpretation of reality from SG combined with some energetic protection from Singularity.

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#107

Sub plans being reconsidered. Planning my stack for minimum 3 months

Overall goal is to consolidate my level across all subs I use at this moment. Each custom will directly focus on its own concept & goals.

Modules are subject to change till they’re built

Dice Man: Builder Set

Concept
Err…the Dice Man’s foundation?

Goals

  • Continue increasing active income. Already on this, just couldn’t dedicate the required focus.
  • Cover practical bases of survival & living I.e adopting foundational structured habits.

Cores
ASBR
RICH

Modules
ESSENCE: Stabilizer?
Experimental ZPU Adaptive Scripting
Power of Sacrifice
Pragya
Omnidimensional
Mosaic

Temple of Desire

Concept
Embodying my space where desire is present, expressed in all that exists, even when not actively stirred.

Note: Still trying to decide if I’m going for focus, driving or more depth

Goals

  • Presence
  • Physical shifting
  • Healing

Cores
Wanted
NREE/S&S/KB St1

Modules
ESSENCE: Summertime/P:Sleep?
Experimental ZPU Adaptive Scripting
Epigenetics & DNA Modulator
//MDFY: Freedom
Irresistible Relaxation
//Mosaic

Both combined with GG

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#108

Behold I serve myself up on a golden platter. If only you could have a taste. But can you. Are you worthy of my blessing?

Well, that took a different turn😅

#109

I’ve felt angry, ignored and frustrated. Now, I’m genuinely interested in the structures generating this.

One-Sided attention in interactions

We’re in conversation, I listen listen and listen some more, but when I start speaking, about my life, something that interests me, or something they ask about in the moment, suddenly they have something better to do? Or say? Then rapidly try to switch the attention back on them.

Like only my listening is valuable to them. And my expression doesn’t really matter. I’ve pointed this out multiple times, apologies come but behaviors never seem to change and every time I have to assert myself or continuously interrupt in order to be heard.

This is extremely prominent with my family, unless it concerns their interests. Now, it’s beginning to bleed into other encounters. And frequency is increasing.

Am I supposed to just remain a sponge for you?
Is me paying attention to you more valuable than me myself?
Why can’t you just actually listen to me?

I can tell it’s not boredom because there’s this underlying sense of captivation and “please, let me offer you more, more, and more about myself in our interaction” the body language, the eyes, the motormouth. I can be obviously ignoring, which I do a lot these days, but they keep going on and on, unless I outright dismiss them.

Now, there are a couple things this points to

Firstly, I used to think maybe I’m being taught patience in listening more, but this is definitely something deep reflecting from me.

Blocking people from sharing my world while still deeply desiring their attention. How are they to give me attention when I’m making it extremely hard for them to deposit?

Open up and receive, let people be captivated when you speak too.

Secondly, I don’t think I value my attention nearly enough.

Thirdly, I will have to dismiss people. Started doing this unknowingly. Just showing I’m not interested almost never works anymore. Now, I’m getting bluntly expressive about it.