StarkQ, Wanted and Primal Seduction

November 10, 2021

Quick update, energy levels are better but I’m still a little tired.

I’m really coming out of my shell. I’m starting to be more social and it feels great. I also feel a incredibly relaxed around people now. No longer am I hyper aware of everyone and all the social intricacies.

I’m just present in the moment.

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November 11, 2021

Last night played:

I woke up feeling good today. But after I started working, I was getting angry and frustrated.

Strong recon, similar to when I started Regeneration.

I had imaginary arguments with people, imagining beating people up, questioning my life and all my problems.

I have so many issues to solve in my life, and it’s overwhelming to think about sometimes. I’m not one of those cats that can focus on one area of life at a time.

As soon as I start making progress in one area, another shouts at me and doesn’t leave me alone until I do something about it.

For example, today, I was thinking, “I should run Quantum Limitless. My discipline is shit, my productivity is terrible, my focus sucks, and I’ve always struggled with studying/ learning my whole life. It’s always made me feel stupid. Other kids could do their school work so quickly, but for me, it was cripplingly boring.

Then I think, but I’d have to drop Stark, and I need an alpha sub that covers finance and empire building. And I also need to be more social and build my circle. And I also need to start getting with girls; I can’t waste away my 20’s.

I don’t want one without the other. I NEED EVERYTHING.

It’s hard to ask me, “what’s the one thing that if you fixed, would improve your life the most”

Because I’d say ALL.

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Today was nothing, nothing good or bad.

Just average. A bit of recon is still present.

I felt lost for a bit, like questioning my existence lost.

I was questioning my goals, my actions. How can I eliminate distractions from my life and focus on one thing? That’s the main one.

This whole week I was tired and completely unmotivated to do anything after work.

Everything bored me. My attention span has been terrible.

Even yesterday, because it was remembrance day, I was going to watch a documentary on Stalingrad.

But I couldn’t even watch it for 30 seconds.

THAT BORED

So hopefully, that resolves itself because it’s annoying. I just want to get stuff done and make progress in my life.

I cant stand feeling stagnant

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November 14, 2021

My body language feels more graceful and masculine. My gaze feels strong and intense.

Recon was rather strong this week; when it cleared, I felt a profound sense of relief. I was firing on all cylinders.

But I made the mistake of running True social before going to the gym (in anticipation of going out last night)

Usually, this isn’t a problem as I’ve done it the last two weekends with excellent results. But yesterday it was too much. My mind felt a little overwhelmed. I felt anti-social, a bit anxious, and lots of negative thoughts and feelings came up.

I guess the old saying is true… if it’s not broken, don’t fix it. More doesn’t always = better. In the future, I should pay more attention to how I feel when it comes to that.

Another problem is coming to the forefront of my mind, and it has to do with fundamentals.

Style. The clothes I wear. I need to purge my wardrobe; it’s time to develop my new style. My jacket is old and doesn’t fit me. My shoes and boots need an upgrade. I need new gym attire etc. Most of my shirts and pants are from 3 or 4 years ago and they need to go.

So I think I’ll do a bit of shopping🤑.

“When you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good, you perform good.”

Till next time

  • Mat
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November 17, 2021

Yesterday I experienced a bit of recon, but not near as bad my first week on my new rotation. In the afternoon, I was being bombarded with so many memories one after another.

One that stuck with me wasn’t so much a memory. But a feeling. A feeling of winning. BEING A WINNER.

There was a time I felt this way all the time. I was getting in the best shape of my life, so many hot girls were into me, I was dating the hottest girl in school, I had so many friends, and I had just gotten my first job.

Life was exciting; I woke up eager to start every day.

I felt that way for about 5 minutes yesterday. And thought to myself… how can I bring this feeling back?

How can I be a winner again?

I think it just comes down to breaking old habits. And I think I’m off to a good start.

Today was a good day; I’m becoming more and more comfortable being myself around others. I no longer feel this need to put on a front. I can be my authentic self.

I’m also warming up to others. Socializing is becoming natural to me. It seemed like I talked to everyone today. I wasn’t the “observer”; I got in on the action. I made people laugh, said what I thought, asserted myself. It felt great.

Now I gotta keep pushing.

I’m also becoming more comfortable in my skin. My body feels light like all this built-up nervous tension has left my body.

If I had to rate my level of anxiety on a scale from
0 - 10

Right now, it’d be a 4.

Two months ago, it’d be a 6

4- 6 months ago, it’d be a 7-8

It’s incredible to notice. It happened so slowly and gradually. Like it was so slow that I didn’t see I was changing… weird.

Last note, I’m getting good at my job. I build roof trusses, and I’m used to building on top of the tables. But I’ve been trained to work the bottom (which involves throwing up all the wood and figuring out where the various pieces go)

I used to find it so hard, but today was easy. It came naturally to me.

Feels good to see progress. :slight_smile:

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November 18, 2021

(Warning NSFW)

Summary

Regen bloom is clearly in effect.

I had a realization while in the car this morning.
Everywhere I go, I feel like I’m being judged. That’s my “social anxiety.”

As irrational as it may sound, everywhere I go, I feel like people are waiting to find something to laugh at me for. And I figured out where it comes from.

In Grade 10, I did this thing called dare night. You had a team of 4-6 people and were given dares ranging from “hug a random stranger” to “Have sex in public.” As proof, you had to make a private IG account and post the videos.

An older girl (who was hot) asked me if she could take me into the girl’s washroom and do a few dares :wink:

I agreed but was really nervous. On top of that, I was 16, and it was my second time ever being drunk.

So when it came time to do the deed, I couldn’t get it up. And I wasn’t a show-er (at least back then)
So she gave me a bj (or at least she tried)
After that, the girl recording the video runs to all her friends to show them the video. (Which was embarrassing asf.)

Within about 24 hrs, the entire school knew and was talking about it. Everyone thought I had a small dick.
I went from every girl in school drooling over me to laughing at me.

This completely shattered my self-esteem.

The funny thing is I’m actually above average in terms of size but nevertheless…

After that, I’d walk through the school, thinking everyone was constantly judging me. And that got me pissed off.

Then when I had a fall out with that girl…

It was the last straw that made me say fuck everyone. No more Mr nice guy; I’m tired of getting walked all over.

“Yeah, he’s really hot, but he has a small dick.”

“He used to be really nice, but now he’s bitter that (insert girl’s name) tried to friend-zone him.”

The realization is I still walk through my day-to-day life with the outdated belief that everyone’s judging me and laughing at me. This is clearly irrational. The random people I encounter on the street do not know these things about me. Let alone care. But it’s a subconscious reaction. All day, I can tell myself “no one cares about you; stop worrying about what they think.” But my subconscious has a hard time letting go.

I think it’s because I shy away from sex. Since that event, I’ve turned down sex multiple times out of insecurity. “What if my dick is small, what if I can’t last long, what if what if what if…?

Well, I’ll never know until I try. Maybe all it takes is one try. What if I succeed? What will happen then?

A paradigm shift, that’s what.

So what does this mean? Getting good at sex will skyrocket my confidence and destroy those seeds of doubt that I’ve held onto for far too long.

I think running diamond QZP + PS QZP sounds just right for the job.

That’s the way out.

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I don’t know what I’m going to run come December 1st.

I know I’m going to run Wanted QZP for sure.
I want to run Primal seduction QZP
And I also really want to run Diamond QZP

But I also REALLY want to run R.I.C.H QZP
And Chosen sounds right up my alley. Leadership is a trait I need to develop.

Since running R.I.C.H again, I’ve had this unrelenting drive to start writing copy again and get myself on the path to financial freedom.

And at the same time, my confidence is through the roof, and my sociability is skyrocketing. Running a focused stack doesn’t seem right to me at the moment.

So I have a dilemma. I want to run a focused stack:

Like Wanted QZP, Primal Seduction QZP and Diamond QZP

Followed by R.I.C.H QZP, Limitless QZP, and Chosen.

…but I don’t want to regress in other areas not behind addressed by my sub rotation.

(On top of that, I don’t want to drop StarkQ, I really like it.)

Ugh… now that I’m getting results in multiple areas of my life, how can I stop and focus on one thing?

Sub Club problems😅. I never thought that I’d be complaining about results smh.

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It seems like everyone is having this dilemma. I wish I had a hyperbolic time chamber

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December 1st - January 13th: Chosen, R.I.C.H, Wanted

January 21st - March 7th: Primal Seduction, Limitless, Diamond.

March 15th -April 29th: Stark, Heartsong, Wanted. (Might go ahead and make my custom and swap Stark for it

Subject to change but just a general idea*

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What are your goals with these? It’s a great stack!

Chosen: For me, it’s hard to just let loose and enjoy socializing. I’m always tense, I overthink everything. Theirs always some degree of stress involved. This stress affects my ability to be witty, to lead others, and to fully be myself. My true nature is very extroverted and I despise “Following the heard”.

Bottom line is I’m known as quiet and timid by most people in my life and I want to completely abolish this from my life.

(This is also the main goal of my custom)

R.I.C.H: I aspire to be very financially successful. My main goal atm is to quit my job by becoming a freelance copywriter. I also have some investments in crypto, so overall I just want to increase my income.

Wanted:

I’ve always had women chase me. I’m a handsome dude, so I just want to leverage my assets. Wanted is my natural archetype. But I’m mainly interested in the physical shifting component of Wanted QZP.

I train regularly at the gym, and since beginning wanted qv2 my body looks incredible. I can only imagine what I’ll look like on Wanted QZP.

Primal Seduction: As much as I love attracting women to me. As a man, I feel like I should be able to actively seduce women. Even if it takes a little more effort, turning a “hmm maybe” girl into “hell yes let’s fuck right here right now” girl is quite the experience. I also personally believe men should lead the interaction. I should be confident enough to walk up to a women I’ve never seen before and game her.

Diamond: Male enhancement, improve sexual experience for both partners.

Limitless: Growing up I always had trouble with school. I couldn’t study for the life of me. I never did homework. I got terrible grades, and this lead me to develop an inferiority complex around my intelligence.

I want to fix that. I want to improve my cognitive abilities, I want to improve my learning speed, and I want to improve my overall productivity.

I already explained my reasoning for Stark Heartsong and Wanted here:

Changed my mind.

I will run Wanted QZP + Primal Seduction QZP

Question is…

Do I run R.I.C.H or Chosen?

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If I were you, I’d choose RICH

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I would run RICH with a skills-building title. RICH alone may not be enough to get you to riches. Wanted or PS is not the best choice in that regard. You can create two stacks you would rotate every 45 days. One stack for sex: Wanted, PS and Diamonds, and the other for wealth Chosen, Limitless and RICH. For example.

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I like this idea. I’m going to run with this.

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Stack #1 (Chosen, Limitless, R.I.C.H)

Stack #2 (Wanted, Primal Seduction, Diamond)

It breaks my heart to say this but, Wanted QZP will have to wait.

I have Wants, and I have needs.

Stack #1 Addresses the latter.

Plus… even if I achieved my desired goals with stack #2, I know I wouldn’t be fulfilled.

It’s alright though; I’ll just sit back and watch all of you become Chad’s in real-time😎

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Changed my mind

Stack 1: Chosen, StarkQ, R.I.C.H.

Why stop now? I’m just getting started:

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Well… this was a short run. Funny how things change.

First and foremost, I love this stack. It’s undoubtedly going to make a return in the future.

How do I feel right now?

It isn’t easy to put into words. One very notable difference, I feel lighter. Physically and mentally. The tension I’ve carried in my body for years seems to have vanished. (Thanks, Regen🥂)

When I think back to those tough times, it feels like an alternate reality. Have you ever watched a movie and started identifying so strongly with the characters that you began feeling scared/worried for them?

That is how these memories feel to me. I was the movie’s main character, and I would worry about him.

But then I realize… it’s just a movie.
It’s not real. (At least not anymore)

Before subs, I would remember these situations, and it would strike fear into my heart, which made me act out on those fears, making them real.

Now I think, “Ya, that’s a thing of the past. I no longer dwell on these thoughts and feelings. I recognize them as they are, just thoughts and feelings.

The law of vibration is real… believe me, I know.
And if you don’t believe… simply put, “We become what we think about.”

I’ll post my final closing thoughts tomorrow.

Till then

  • Mat
4 Likes

Hey man I like your journal. Hit me with ya Twitter or telegram handle.

Yeah sure! Telegram is [redacted]

[Moderator note: to protect you privacy, I noticed @SWITCH liked your post, so I figured he got your message, and I’ve blocked it out.]

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