[SOLO] Hail to the EmperorQ

[bujin]

I ran EQ masked for approximately 10 hours today.

• By the second loop I was feeling unusually positive and happy. I initially dismissed the idea that EQ was causing this since it was such a strong feeling so soon after I started, but other experiences throughout the day combined with early reports from others strongly suggest to me that it was EQ.
• I remained in a positive mood until around 1pm when I started feeling very agitated. This lasted about two hours. My first reconciliation on EQ?
• Then my mood started improving and by 5pm I was in a great mood, happy and optimistic and feeling fantastic.
• Walking along whenever I saw any attractive women I felt very strong desire for them. I just wanted to pound the fuck out of them.
• Around 5.30 the optimism started fading, I could literally feel it draining away, although nothing actually happened to cause my mood to change. I felt some mild agitation.
• About half an hour later my mood stabilized and I felt pretty good, and still do now.

What’s really interesting is how raw those emotions were, there was nothing subtle or refined about them. I’m usually pretty stable, but not today.

Given the dreams I had on Ev4, I’m really looking forward to tonight.

[bujin]

@AMASH talked about the difference in feeling between Ev4 and EQ in his journal, and I wanted to add my thoughts in that regard. Obviously it’s very early with EQ so things may change.

With Ev4 I felt a strong drive to work and get things done, but in many ways it felt like a grind. One that I was willing to do to ensure my success, but it lacked any real interest or joy. It was work, stuff I needed to do.

I’ve certainly worked hard for things in my life, but it was never a grind, it was a flow. Success usually came to me easily, but only when I was ready and open for it. Ev4 made me want to grind my way to success. This was the one thing that really bothered me about Ev4. I’m hoping EQ is different. It certainly feels different so far.

[bujin]

Was hoping for dramatic dreams like when I started Ev4. Instead I dreamed about my cats all night.

[bujin]

I normally take weekends off subs but figured I’d do a couple of loops since I only started EQ yesterday. Even that was noticeable.

The effect EQ has on my mood is just insane. I was really annoyed earlier today about something, but literally within 10 minutes of putting EQ on I was in a great mood and feeling stupidly happy.

Aside from that it was just a quiet Saturday, mostly did some work for the startup I mentioned above, but I completed what I needed to. It remains to be seen if EQ has the same effect on productivity that Ev4 did, but I felt good working today. Definitely better than I did on Ev4.

[AMASH]

The effect EQ has on my mood is just insane. I was really annoyed earlier today about something, but literally within 10 minutes of putting EQ on I was in a great mood and feeling stupidly happy.

It’s like EmperorQ is a true mood enhancer. I prefer running subs when in a good mood, rather than feeling down.

[bujin]

EQ is an amazing mood enhancer!

I prefer running subs when in a good mood,

I recalled this comment by @SaintSovereign:

How to listen for a long time with busy life?

The alchemical process is largely driven by emotion – the stronger the emotion, the more powerful the outcome. Listening to music that makes you feel good (your favorite tracks that makes you feel like you’re on top of the world) can promote subconscious change much faster

Subliminal programming that enhances mood may also enhance the rest of the programming as well, a form of built-in positive reinforcement for the sub as a whole. You’re certainly less likely to resist change when happy.

[bujin]

I woke up with a lot of sexual thoughts this morning. This used to happen a lot on Khan, but this feels different. Khan really cranked up my libido to crazy levels, which naturally made me think of sex. EQ makes me think of sex but so far no obvious libido boost.

The emotions I get on EQ definitely seem to have a raw quality, like they’re bypassing my usual emotional filters.

I only have a vague recollection of my dreams last night. There were multiple, but I couldn’t really say much about them.

Will only run a couple of loops today as it’s another rest day, but tomorrow back to ~10hrs per day.

[Hermit]

@bujin

EQ is an amazing mood enhancer!

AMASH:

I prefer running subs when in a good mood,

I recalled this comment by @SaintSovereign:

How to listen for a long time with busy life?

The alchemical process is largely driven by emotion – the stronger the emotion, the more powerful the outcome. Listening to music that makes you feel good (your favorite tracks that makes you feel like you’re on top of the world) can promote subconscious change much faster

Subliminal programming that enhances mood may also enhance the rest of the programming as well, a form of built-in positive reinforcement for the sub as a whole. You’re certainly less likely to resist change when happy.

Yes, this is in fact very true. The higher the frequency of an emotion the more energy and thus the faster changes can manifest through law of attraction.

I genuinely believe this is why Emperor Q feels so much lighter.

[bujin]

I was only going to do a couple of loops yesterday but it felt good so did about 8 hours instead.

Only got limited sleep last night, so I’m feeling pretty wiped out this morning. Also have a mild headache plus odd body aches that come and go. Guess it could be EQ but more likely it’s a cold, some shit is going around.

Oh well. A gallon of caffeine and a mountain of greasy breakfast meat will make me feel better. Woooo. If EQ has any dietary control included, it’s not working.

Looking forward to a full day of EQ, will pay particular attention to productivity and how much I enjoy the work, and also my interactions with coworkers.

Aiming for 12 hours exposure today.

[bujin]

Aaaaaand there it is. Mr Libido comes calling. Pretty woman = insta-boner.

Just like Khan. Good times.

[bujin]

So, interesting day.

Despite waking up tired (like many others it seems) and with a headache, my mood was great after a loop or so of EQ. I felt confident and happy in the morning, and interactions with people were effortless. I threw flirty looks and smiles at attractive young women without really thinking about it.

Around noon my headache and tiredness got a lot worse and I hit a bit of a wall. I considered just going home, but stuck with it and my mid afternoon the headache faded and some energy returned, but generally felt a bit listless.

Later, while sitting on the train heading home, I slipped into a depressed mood, with strong feelings of loss and loneliness and regret. I do have my low points at times but this was different and out of character for me, I don’t normally waste my time dwelling on regrets for things in the past.

Additionally, I started thinking of the start-up I was involved with, and whether I really wanted to be involved. There’s no doubt the potential there is big, and with my equity I figure 5 years of effort could potentially net me millions. But I realized my heart wasn’t actually in it. I’ve previously said I didn’t give a damn about building an empire, and I meant it. But my time with Ev4 seems to have shifted my focus to exactly that. So now I have to decide if I want to continue with it or walk away. Plus I can feel the spiritual path calling to me again.

I’m thinking a lot of this is coming from New Beginnings. It’s funny, I ran Ev4 for a couple of months and felt nothing from NB, and now only a couple of days into EQ and it kicks me square in the gut.

Right now I’m bone-tired and somewhat at a loss about how to proceed. Will sleep on it and hope for some guidance.

[bujin]

I did receive some answers overnight. As usual they require interpretation. Will think on it.

But aside from that my dreams were vague, nothing like I was getting with Ev4. Will try listening to Dreams before bed. I didn’t have a lot of success with it previously, but it might help.

It feels to me that Ev4 focused a lot on material success, but I’m wondering if EQ recognizes that success and abundance go beyond mere money and focuses more on happiness and fulfillment and allows the listener to more broadly define their idea of wealth.

[bujin]

Felt much better this morning, no headache and not as tired, but I was feeling introspective earlier in the morning. Mostly kept to myself. But by midmorning I was feeling better and happy again, and I had a smile on my face for no apparent reason. I was also feeling more focused and engaged with my work and my colleagues.

Also feeling an urge toward healthier food choices today.

[bujin]

Really mixed day yesterday, alternated between being outgoing and introspective. This NB reconciliation (I’m assuming) is coming in waves. Nothing major, but my mood is erratic. My work productivity and personal interactions followed with my moods, when I was feeling introspective it definitely suffered. By 5pm I was feeling drained and mentally fatigued.

Still feel tired this morning.

Since I missed my off day on Sunday I’ve decided to take an off day today instead. I want to let my subconscious integrate the programming so far. Back to it tomorrow.

There’s a definite push towards healthier eating, I’m finding myself thinking forward to what I’ll be eating for the day and I’ve been leaning towards healthier options. Overall my appetite is somewhat reduced.

[AMASH]

I’ve decided to take an off day today instead. I want to let my subconscious integrate the programming so far. Back to it tomorrow.

Yes, I noticed that alternation in mood on EmperorQ. A day off helps very much.
But maybe EmperorQa has fixed this.

I look forward to your future reports

[bujin]

Yeah, it’s strange. Moods tend to cycle naturally anyway, but these are exaggerated. Happy mode is almost a giddy high, whereas introspective mode is almost like a mild depression.

Is this just NB doing it’s thing, the process of reconciliation then integration (i.e. resistance then release) causing the emotional swings?

To me it almost feels like the usual emotional filters are being bypassed to a degree allowing me to feel emotions more intensely, which includes both the highs and the lows.

[bujin]

@AMASH You were right, taking the day off has helped. I’ve settled into a positive mood, feeling good with a smile on my face.

[bujin]

Just a quick wrap-up on yesterday. Since it was a no-sub day, I spent the day listening to uplifting music while I worked. Not a lot to report other than I was in a good mood, calm and happy. Much happier than I usually am. I’m hoping this is what life on EQ will be like once the worst of the reconciliation is resolved. Still tired though, so I think my subconscious is still working away at the new programming.

This morning I woke up still feeling tired, I felt like I needed another 3-4 hours sleep. No dreams again, I know I had them but it’s all foggy, I can’t remember anything about them.

Restarted EQ today. It was very much like yesterday, I was in a calm happy mood. No signs of the mood swings yet. There were major changes at work, and people freaking out about shit, but I couldn’t help smiling. None of that stuff worries me anymore.

I’ll most likely stay with the start-up. Every sign indicates I should stay. And today a solution manifested for one of my biggest concerns. It’s true that my heart isn’t in right now, but I’m getting enough signs on this that I probably shouldn’t ignore it. I’ve also realized a number of benefits of going down that road, whereas the last couple of days I was focused on the negatives. But it’s going to be tough, and I’ll be taking a big financial risk.

I’m going to try sleeping in on Saturday, see if a few extra hours help with the tiredness.

[bujin]

Lots of disruption at home on Friday and Saturday due to construction work on my house and a sick cat, so I had no time for listening to EQ or journalling. Shit happens. Things are mostly back to normal today, so will be getting a few hours of listening in.

Despite the break, I’m feeling a stronger push to focus on my diet and health. Better food choices and focus on variety and freshness. My jeans have felt looser on me the last few days but I haven’t weighed myself, it doesn’t seem important. I had some weird stomach issues during the week but feeling better now. I’ve also started getting some of the soreness others have reported, in my case in my upper body.

I’ve been feeling a strong push to nail down my spending habits. It’s been many years since I’ve run any kind of budget or even paid attention to my spending, which is definitely excessive. I earn a very good salary and have no debts (except mortgage), so I stopped keeping track of my spending long ago, which is pretty stupid. That wasted money could have gone towards investments. This will change.

I’ve been thinking of my past interactions with people. Some of the ways I’ve behaved in the past now seem strange and foolish. But it’s not how I acted that bothers me, it’s the motivation behind those actions, what I felt and what I wanted from those interactions. Too much calculating outcomes (which I’m sorry to say I’m exceptionally good at) and not enough just being present and honest with my emotions.

It’s a beautiful day today, I’m sitting outside on my deck enjoying a beer and watching eagles circling overhead. Feeling really good.

[bujin]

Something shifted overnight.

I woke up exhausted, but my reality has changed. I’m still trying to understand it. I feel clearer and more certain about what I want, what I’m willing to accept, what actions I need to perform and what risks I’m willing to take. My sense of uncertainty is greatly reduced, I feel more centered and “solid”.

I spent all morning deep in thought about the startup, about things I hadn’t consciously considered before, but which I’m sure my subconscious had, and was the reason for my uncertainty about the whole venture. Lots to process. I think things are coming to a head. Some things need to change or I’ll have to walk away.

No more ambivalence. Today is about action with purpose.