So, luckily, I wasn’t going through terrible recon.
Unfortunately, I likely have (had) the Omicron variant that has been making its way downtown. I’m getting better, and i haven’t gotten tested yet, but my lady tested positive a few days ago.
I’m feeling far better than I was, but I still have aches in my left arm and my back.
I’m listening to Chosen and Limitless. I think this will be the last loop before my washout; I have to double check.
Get well soon, my friend. Maybe a run of Paragon ZP + Aegis Initiative C19 Qv2 will help
I don’t think the latter was ever made into Qv2 version. I remember requesting it, but it was never responded to and I don’t remember seeing it being confirmed.
I am considering Paragon ZP, but I’m still trying to follow recommendations and my next opportunity to listen to it on my current track would be in over a week.
I’m healing pretty quickly, though.
I sort of had one of those ‘duh’ moments earlier today in the morning where I realized that I was dealing with it in a very limiting way and that -long story short - since I had created the circumstances in myself allowing there to be a virus affecting me in the first place…
So yeah, I’m well on the way to feeling great again. I have a pain in my left arm and a consistent headache that has lasted the majority of the day, but that’s a huge improvement from the past two days of pure misery.
Ah yes you might be right there. I did request too multiple times and the last thing I heard is that SaintSovereign did say he will convert it to ZP.
But a Qv1 title is also enhanced by ZP and SaintSovereign has confirmed this.
Anyways, since you are recovering fast, that’s all that matters.
Oh, I hope that is the case 
I hadn’t seen that.
I finally got around to naming my latest custom, though I can easily see myself changing it later.
Pygmalion’s Momentum
Heartsong Core
Wanted Core
DIAMOND Ultima Core
Alexander’s Play
Lifeblood Fable
Transcendental Connection
Gorgeous Manifestor
Sexual Manifestation
Instant Seducing Tactician
Entranced
Temptation
Ethereal Presence
Eventide
Omnidimensional
Potentiator
Furious Ascent
Yggdrasil
Divine Will
Limit Destroyer
ARES
Aren’t customs with Ultima core maxed out at 6?
Custom Ultimas, yes.
Custom Q’s, no.
Oh, thanks for clarifying!
Since I’ve been using the new custom, the only thing I’ve noticed is that I get horny af.
-sigh-
The one I forgot I was waiting for.
I’m thinking I’ll replace Chosen after the 5 day reset with this.
It’ll be between that and Emperor.
Limitless is definitely affecting my gaming abilities.
I’m once more becoming aware of a Stirring within me. I’m not sure where it’s going to lead but something also tells me I’ll be starting to journal more once again.
1/19/21
Let’s get back in into the swing of things.
First and foremost.
I feel that the following is related to the module Furious Ascent in my tentatively named custom, Pygmalion’s Momentum.
I am finding that I have ‘intrusive’ thoughts of desire about women that are generally accompanied by a swelling up of mixed emotions. I’m seeing more of a desire to say ‘fuggit’ when I’m interacting with women, too.
Complimenting women is more of an desire now than a source of anxiety, if that makes sense. This isn’t novel so I don’t give foundational credit to PM. However, I can say PM is changing that to me feeling as if I WANT to do it and it nags me somewhat if I WANT to compliment a girl but don’t. I hope that makes sense for a reader.
I’ve been horny, horny, horny. Luckily, I operate very well under sexual pressure. In fact, I almost prefer the vibration of just about everything I do having that raw sexual current just beyond casual view. I like the feeling of feeling that rush of energy pulsating through me.
That being said, the first two days were full of NARBs.
I’m noticing a new pattern with my girlfriend. When we’re laying down together and I begin to relax, she begins to notice ‘my sexiness’ and start touching me while cooing and marveling.
Yesterday, she got up in the morning when i did as I was getting ready for work, and, pulled my pants down and asked me if I wanted her to kiss the sage. Naturally, I told the heathen to proceed as she would and she gave my guy some love briefly and looked up at me and said to go take a shower so she could enjoy it all in her mouth.
Boooooi, I said…
My erections are friggin’ pleasurable. I forgot why I liked DIAMONDQ so much besides the sex, but that’s something I remember from when I ran it early last year. Being turned on feels good for me.
I find that my observant nature is being channeled into my eyes when I look at women. The feeling is something like… Like, in a movie, when a suave, mysterious man with a somewhat troubled past is being pursued by a woman and is fully aware of it but, because his mind is elsewhere, simply studies her in each and every encounter that they have, in a manner that makes the woman unsure if he’s just intensely watching her or actively interested.
I hope that that run-on sentence makes sense as well. It hasn’t come from impression to thought to word quite yet so I’ll come back to that description another time.
I have somewhat conflicting feelings about what exactly I want from novel women. I expected this. I think it’s from a couple of modules interacting with HS and Wanted cores, but the one that comes to mind is ARES.
Such a cool module, btw.
There was a time or two yesterday that I felt the attraction of women to me in a more raw manner. I’m also coming to the realization that there’s something in my brain that wants to deny these realizations or write them off or dismiss them in some fashion.
“Nah, she’s smiling at you while looking you in the eyes. Anything you’re perceiving past that is projection.”
“No, she’s not giving you a different smile than she just gave him a moment ago. Wishful thinking guy.”
“No, she’s not lingering in the area for your sake. Too convenient and no one’s that obvious.”
And so on.
Ending this post here because damn, I have a lot to get out of my head.
This is the first custom I’ve ever created that I’ve second guessed a core choice. Not because I’m not happy with my choices but because I feel like I overlooked a pretty perfect addition to this custom.
Primal.
But, I’m not concerned about that. Just wanted to note that for future reference.
Diamond Ultima Core in Pygmalion’s Momentum seems to be a dominant influence in the mix with Wanted and Heartsong, lol.
I woke up this morning as most men are wont. I also noticed that it refused to subside for almost half of an hour afterwards, almost the entire time it took me to get ready for work and start up my bike.
So one aspect of this custom that is immediately noticeable to me is that my libido is there, present and just about always ready at a moment’s notice. It reminds me of being 19 again.
My girl seems to always find a way to bring up how sexy/handsome I am, especially it seems after she is talking about something completely unrelated and trails off. I almost laughed last night because she was laying towards me on the couch gazing at me and just came out of nowhere to say, “I should really have sex with you more.”
I thought it was funny.
I’m avoiding talking about Wanted in my custom for a bit of time, for the simple fact that i have no idea how to gauge where my Wanted ZP use’s influence ends and where the core will begin. But I must assuredly will be expounding on Wanted in the future.
Let’s see.
I think that the Heartsong core has improved my ability to snap at my girl and quickly let go of the incident once I deliver whatever message was necessary. Seeing as that can come across as a bit toxic because of my chosen words, let me give a simple example.
I was giving my son a bath last night. He was splish splashing and I was sitting on the cover of the toilet listening with half an ear as he was trying out new words to himself, when he suddenly stands up with an alarmed look on his face and says, “Poo”.
I barely glanced up and replied, “Nah, that’s water.”
He says, “POOO POOOOO” and reaches behind himself and when he comes back forward, he offers me a nugget of proof.
I’m really stuck on punny language lately and it’s not really intentional.
I said, “
” and told him to just put it down and i was gonna get him out forthwith. He didn’t appreciate that and I saw - for the first time in his two years - him put two and two together (me basically telling him to put his shit back into his bath water that he was in) I saw a look of revulsion on my son’s face that immediately fractured my heart and tried to hurriedly assuredly reiterate I was getting him out but he had made up his mind that if daddy was gonna lag, he was gonna have to stand on his own two feet and get out.
What’s with these puns? 
I got a bit more stern and told him to wait, I’d get him out right now. Well, just as I shuddered and took the crap out of his hands and started fishing around for the other one, I hear my girl in the living room say sarcastically, just loud enough for me to hear, “Well, maybe he’s disgusted that his dad wants him to sit in shit water and wants out.”
This was all, beginning to now, about 5-10 seconds.
So, I immediately was irked and said back at a slightly higher volume that I was getting him out, I just didn’t really feel the need to have baby poop pressed into my back and that I had it handled, so stop being an ass.
Silence.
I thought she was mad. But when I asked her if she had his clothes ready about half a minute later, she replied in a perfectly normal tone, yeah. And there was no further mention.
I’m starting to begin to crack through the emotional recon I didn’t even realize I was going through.
My emotions are certainly opening up and it’s clearing up my mind on several things.
I did my first experimental thing the other day, the first since the preview began. I ran Limitless and Chosen ZP, followed a bit later by CFW.
The other day meaning, the last day that I played Limitless and Chosen on a play-day, not just off the cuff.
To be continued, slip seating.
Continuing
I didn’t notice much from CFW initially. But over the next 3 days, I definitely went through some emotional shit that resolved rather quickly. The third day felt freaking amazing emotionally.
I’m considering keeping up this program of Limitless ZP and Chosen, Limitless ZP and CFW. But I’m not sure.
It’s about time that I started tentatively expanding my listening beyond the recommendations, I think. I’m not sure that I care if someone thinks otherwise.
