Reclaiming my power - A Journal by MatAlexander305

[Matalexander305]

@Vesper

Instant Seducing Tactician => Long Range Seduction (I’m telling you this is the best for online dating)

I don’t like online dating, so probably won’t use this.

@Vesper

Temptation => Apollon but I think Facial Morphing would be better (The thing with Apollon it will be harder for you to gain muscle since it’s not deemed as a beauty standard if that makes sense since your into fitness you will have to gauge if this is worth sacrificing or not)

Temptation’s staying, facial morphing might get a spot, Apollon is probably going to be included too. I’m actually starting to think I don’t want bigger muscles, but rather I want more of perfection. I want to be hard, lean and balanced like a Greek god. I hate the typical bulky bodybuilder look, it’s not attractive to most women and it’s not practical for real life. And as a shorter guy, being freakishly muscular looks bad because it makes you seem even shorter.

@Vesper

Lion IV => SPS: Endocrine System (Better testosterone = Better physical shifting results and more testosterone means you have more desire/confidence to approach girls so perfect for you but you already know this lol)

Good point

@Vesper

Stress Displacement => This one is a tricky one since I already mentioned the most important modules I believe for your custom but for this you have a range of what you can swap it for. For example?

This is to help offset anxiety, maybe furious accent would be better. Maybe with panther, I’d develop the courage to approach more people.

@Vesper

Trouble knowing girls who are pretty => Gorgeous Manifestor

Good one, I always seem to attract the wrong girls and the ones I do want are always challenging to get for some reason. It’s like there is always some external circumstance preventing us from being together. Maybe this module could fix that.

[Matalexander305]

Went clubbing with my friend last night and had a blast. It was just us two. It’s funny cause we never went to the club alone before. Usually we go with other people but we said F it and went anyways.

It was funny cause when we were in line I saw a girl knew. We made super brief eye contract and then she walked up to me and said “Hey, who do you think you are ignoring me?”

I just stood there, and stared her down for a good 5 seconds and said “wait, you’re (insert girls name)”
Obviously I knew who she was but I had to play it cool, since she caught me starring. Anyways, she tries to convince us to go to the place across the street and we say no.

We’re still in line, and two girls walk by us. Me being all nonchalant and aloof I look at the blonde one and don’t think much. Then her and her friend walk by us again in the other direction. Again I look briefly and don’t think much of it.

2 minutes later, two guys behind me say “yo, do you not see all these girls hitting on you?” I’m like what girls?

“Those two girls that just walked by, the blonde looked you up and down twice!”

Like wtf, I didn’t see that

The guys seemed so confused, they’re like “do you not care?” And I’m like, no not really. They were dumbfounded. “Oh you have high standards huh.” Well I mean… yes lol but idk I just didn’t care. I could tell these dudes were desperate to be me in that moment it was kind of cool to see myself embody the Wanted archetype so well.

We met another guy in the club that was like “Yo, I’m gonna get you girls tonight. What kind of girls do you like? I’ll find you one. I’m like “Spanish, find me a Latina”. And he’s like umm… that’s going to be hard. And I just smirked and said “cheers”.

Then he turns to this group of hot girls and says “my friend is interested in you”. And I just rolled my eyes and shook my head in dismissal. Didn’t even look at the girls. I hate when guys do this, it’s basically like saying “my friend is too scared to talk to you, so if you’re interested; you need to talk to him”. It’s just cringe.

The girls were hot, but had dates that night. So I didn’t even want to be associated with him after that. It was a nice gesture and but I hate when people can’t read a room and I also can’t stand people who try to talk for me.

At the end of the night, I was by the DJ booth and I made friends with some guy. He had a tequila bottle in his hand so he poured me some. We get to talking and he says he’s a pilot which I thought was super cool. His friend who I also got to know, is a club promoter. Man said he could hook me up with VIP anytime which is cool. When I checked his IG, he had champagne bottles, tequila, all that crazy bottle service stuff going. So I guess I made another high status friend at the club

[Matalexander305]

@Matalexander305

There are a lot of ugly dudes out here dating 11/10’s because of their charisma, their natural masculine qualities, their status etc.

Good example of this:

Last night, there was a super hot blonde standing by the dj booth. We both locked eyes for a good 3 seconds, there was some strong sexual tension there. But I noticed, she stayed in that same spot all night. She didn’t leave once.

At the end of the night, she left with the DJ. The DJ was short (shorter than the girl), ugly and nerdy looking. But he clearly had status, he seemed very masculine and was very confident.

If I had seen this man in any other place with that girl, I would think he’s the a gay best friend. (Nothing wrong with that btw). But I say all of this because it just goes to show you that status, charisma, and all the primal masculine qualities men should have, can easily trump looks.

She might have fancied me, I may have sparked her curiosity, but she left with him. Not me

[Matalexander305]

Omg I just discovered lossless audio on Apple Music

[Matalexander305]

I feel like I’m in a music studio

[Matalexander305]

I’ve decided to go a different route with my custom,

@Luther24

Many people don’t know this, but a “beta-male” is actually a traumatized male - that’s literally all it is. This is why people are saying LBFH is the most alpha sub they used, because it’s healing emotional trauma and belief systems that automatically make one a weak, insecure and easily controllable man with no frame. It’s a sub based on actual congruence. People are just now discovering what it’s like to love/accept themselves on a subconscious level and re-discovering their masculinity, lol.

After reading this brilliant post, I’ve decided to leave wanted in the closet for now.

New custom idea:

Summary

• LBFH

• True social core

• Emperor fitness height inducer

• Physicality shifter - sexiness

• Seducers gaze

• Instant spark

• Focused arousal

• Temptation

• Entranced

• Ethereal presence

• Invincible presence

• Dominion

• Aura of craving

• Elegance

• Light of Humility

• Dragons tongue

• Story teller

• Song of joy

• Furious accent

• Omnidimensional

Love in all forms, healing, socializing, with some Wanted-esque romance & physical shifting modules.

[Matalexander305]

Wisin & Yandel, Chris Brown, T-Pain - Algo Me Gusta De Ti (Official Video)

[Matalexander305]

With all the new talk about 30 second loops, I decided I’d give it a try.

My current stack is Khan St1, QL st2 and my custom (scroll to first post).

It’s been close to a month since I last ran Wanted. So I decided to run 30 seconds of it as I’m most familiar with the how it makes me feel, how it makes me act, the aura etc.

I played it last night and woke up today feeling odd because of a nightmare I had. Was complete unrelated to any of the “Wanted” themes but thought I’d mention it.

I combed my hair much more than usual, I felt the wanted aura very strongly all day and still do right now. I got deer in headlight looks from many people today, men and women. This is random but while eating lunch, I started day dreaming about seducing a girl and did it flawlessly like a true Wanted man would. Like sub model alpha (which is in my custom) it’s like I was practising, and like I said I was actually surprised at all the witty stuff I made up.

Anyways, 30 second loops work, no overload, no recon even though this title isn’t a part of my stack anymore. Depending on how long this lasts, I may do this once a week just cause I love the feeling on wanted. But I don’t want it to get in the way of my stack so I’ll have to see.

(Don’t copy me, I’m experimenting at my own volition)

[Matalexander305]

Welp, just ran my first loop of Khan St1: Total breakdown.

May god have mercy on my soul

[Houdini]

@Matalexander305

I played it last night and woke up today feeling odd because of a nightmare I had.

The dreams I had last night, after the 30 seconds were totally from a sci-fi adventure movie

Ludicrous insane! Lol

[Matalexander305]

@Matalexander305

Welp, just ran my first loop of Khan St1: Total breakdown.

May god have mercy on my soul

So far so good. Voice is deeper (Could be from my custom though), I’m commanding my subordinates with ease now. I feel powerful, assertive, masculine, invincible, my frame is on point. Also, I’m feeling very sexual.

No crazy recon yet, no sad thoughts, and generally nothing bad to say about khan st1 so far.

[Matalexander305]

Feeling very stoic and almost zen on khan st1. Everything I mentioned yesterday still stands. I’m really noticing a strong frame control aspect. Theirs a PCC sort of feel to it. I suddenly have all the power and control in my social interactions. Assertiveness is also very noticeable. It’s never been my forte, but I’m starting to get comfortable with it.

[bombayduck]

Sounds like Khan stage 1 is working just as expected. Beautiful sub.

[Matalexander305]

I’m feeling so lonely. This is the first Friday in a while i haven’t gone out and I’m hating it. The urge to go out and meet people, have fun, do wild stuff is through the roof. I’m tempted to go out by myself but that’s so weird and I’m not used to it. Idk how to make friends lol.

Maybe I’m being dramatic, “ohh poor mat, he’s feeling lonely” get over it smh

[Vesper]

@Matalexander305

Maybe I’m being dramatic, “ohh poor mat, he’s feeling lonely” get over it smh

In one sentence “stop it”. I’ve had people like this who’ve said it to me or said grow up without understand the needs that I have. Some people don’t understand that people like us enjoy going out then staying at home, playing videos games (Which I enjoy but not on weekends) or “relaxing”. That’s why whenever I’m in your city (or next Tuesday hehe) honestly I don’t mind if we go out just the two us because I know we will have fun when we go out.

@Matalexander305

Idk how to make friends lol.

It’s a skill you will have to honestly learn or relearn. For example, I use to be able to easily become friends with people at the gym in a way that is natural but as type went on since I stop doing it, that skilled dulled so when I I became friends with a new person at the gym it was a bit awkward at first but who cares? As long as your growth that’s what most important. Remember social skills is a gift 99% of men don’t have. Imagine you growth to the point where you mastered your social skills, you become the top 1% of men in some shame or form. Now that’s exciting.

@Matalexander305

Maybe I’m being dramatic, “ohh poor mat, he’s feeling lonely” get over it smh

And ps back to this topic, I know exactly how you feel because to be honest I’m feeling it right now. I try not to focus on it but going out is one of the ways I’m able to enjoy my weekends which funnily enough makes me more productive at work and better at it because I already enjoyed the weekend and I don’t just wait for the week to past. For me in my case whenever I ask my closest friend if he wants to go out and says no which it’s been like this for a month now I respect him but deep them I’m not mad I get really sad. Here’s a friend who I use to always go out with and have fun and now he’s gone liking to stay at home or go out with his girl. I love the guy but like I said that still doesn’t fix the deep sadness I feel from not going out. In way, I feel our friendship because less and less strong and honestly it terrifies me but oh well life happens.

[Vesper]

And one last thing whenever your in my city just know if we go out just me and you I’m always down

I’ve always been the type of person to believe in work hard/smart, play hard. Work hard on weekdays and weekend mornings and party at night. If your not doing anything and playing videos games instead then I understand but I genuinely can’t enjoy doing that all day

[Matalexander305]

@Vesper

That’s why whenever I’m in your city (or next Tuesday hehe) honestly I don’t mind if we go out just the two us because I know we will have fun when we go out.

We’ll have a good time, I’m sure of that

@Vesper

It’s a skill you will have to honestly learn or relearn. For example, I use to be able to easily become friends with people at the gym in a way that is natural but as type went on since I stop doing it, that skilled dulled so when I I became friends with a new person at the gym it was a bit awkward at first but who cares?

Yeah you’re right lol, I’m just rarely open to people. I’m very closed off and distant to people I don’t know. It’s not easy to approach me. And for me to approach someone else… ya not happening (at least right now)

@Vesper

Here’s a friend who I use to always go out with and have fun and now he’s gone liking to stay at home or go out with his girl. I love the guy but like I said that still doesn’t fix the deep sadness I feel from not going out. In way, I feel our friendship because less and less strong and honestly it terrifies me but oh well life happens.

Life happens in seasons, sometimes that season differs from person to person. Just try and be understanding.

[Matalexander305]

@Vesper

And one last thing whenever your in my city just know if we go out just me and you I’m always down

I’ve always been the type of person to believe in work hard/smart, play hard. Work hard on weekdays and weekend mornings and party at night. If your not doing anything and playing videos games instead then I understand but I genuinely can’t enjoy doing that all day

Exactly, I used to be like that. Playing video games all day is the most dreadful depressing existence. Work life balance (like you said) is so important to me. I need both (balance) or else things begin to fall apart for me. That’s why I can’t fully go into all out party mode or monk mode.

@Vesper

And one last thing whenever your in my city just know if we go out just me and you I’m always down

:))

[Vesper]

@Matalexander305

Yeah you’re right lol, I’m just rarely open to people. I’m very closed off and distant to people I don’t know. It’s not easy to approach me. And for me to approach someone else… ya not happening (at least right now)

Everyone is but when you make a conscious decision and take action anything is possible if you put your mind to it. If you want to open up and approach people you can and I will help you when we go out no problem. Eventually you will do it so many time that it will be either automatic or natural.

@Matalexander305

Life happens in seasons, sometimes that season differs from person to person. Just try and be understanding.

Like I said I understand but it doesn’t solve my internal sadness of what I want to do and it’s okay but I will damn make sure I find a way to solve it no way or another.

[Vesper]

@Matalexander305

Exactly, I used to be like that. Playing video games all day is the most dreadful depressing existence. Work life balance (like you said) is so important to me. I need both (balance) or else things begin to fall apart for me. That’s why I can’t fully go into all out party mode or monk mode.

Yeah I try monk mode once and never liked it if anything it made my wealth aspects of my life works because my mood was always shit and I was always extremely depressed. Party mode I’ve never done it, I’ve always been pretty balanced in that if I go party I will do usually once every two weeks but I need to at least go out once a week no matter. I can’t stay at home all day and don’t get me wrong I still play videos games but usually only if it’s a new game which I finish right away and then go back to doing what I’ve always done so it’s not a long-term thing it’s just a one day thing usually.