Decided to stack Sex and SeductionQ to StarkQ.
Reconciliation hit hard this morning. Anger, frustration, everyone on the road seemed to want to annoy me and of course a headache, also for a brief while I stopped S&SQ and was only playing StarkQ and thought about changing subs completely. I have the stack playing now starting with S&SQ and Iāll ride it out because my dating life needs a lot of work.
I just realized that Iām treating StarkQ the same way I treated Emperor and that is using it as an excuse to hide and not take action. While I plan on going back to StarkQ, I have to pinpoint the main problem why my life isnāt where it I want it to be. Daredevil (the original version) gave me the results I wanted and I stopped and gave up because reconciliation hit me hard with sadness and I didnāt take it as a sign to continue. Iām working my way back to StarkQ with DaredevilQ first.
Had to go in to work today even though its a holiday which didnāt put me in the best of moods. Also reconciliation had me feeling angry and a little hopeless because I really donāt love my job so to have to do it on a holidayā¦well. But I donāt know what I want to do so I was feeling stuck. That negativity didnāt last though and Iām feeling like something got worked out inside me. Feeling much better now.
I decided that I need to put my dating and social life on hold until the end of June. Just purchased Mogul and going to start getting rid of the work that has piled up and still piling up.
There is something about these subs that Iāve always known was true but I actually experienced yesterday when using MogulQ and that is taking action really is the key. Yesterday I was tackling my work like I donāt think Iāve ever tackled it ever. Just the smallest amount of effort does wonders. Still have some work to complete with Mogul but Iāll be experimenting with the other subs that I have.
I let reconciliation ruin all my progress. I donāt even know what I want anymore or what sub would be best or what is even the point.
This thinking comes from how youāre feeling. Once reconciliation starts to fade away and your emotions get back to neutral or above, youāll start to see where youāre going again. Any action that is able to shift your emotions back into alignment will also work.
Yeah you are right. My goals require action in terms of being social but my anxiety is what hinders my progress. To be social is to open up and be vulnerable and that is terrifying because if it goes wrong thatās going through the chest.
Iāve been doing Khan TBQ since Friday. From the first loop I felt that it was truly more powerful than the original. I decided that Iām just going focus on cleaning out everything thatās holding me back. I have realized that 1 month wonāt be enough. Iām going to use Stage 1 until it is undeniable that I can move on to Stage 2. So far only a few embarrassing memories popped up but nothing else other than that.
Edit: I actually deleted this post because I switched subs for a bit but then switched back to Khan TB. SMH
How many loops of ST1 are you doing? Started it recently and did just one loop today.
Playing it on set and forget
Been reading truth the journals and I donāt think Khan is for me. Iām not the aggressive confrontation type of person. Thatās not my personality. Also I realized that I wasnāt doing bad with Stark but I was reading other journals and I was jealous of the success of everyone else. I also believe that because of being bullied and pushed around (and the worst usually came from being someone that Iām not) I actually started to run away from who I am and started hiding at a young age. Iām ready to be patient now with StarkQ.
Sometimes, youāre making great progress but you donāt notice it because of where youāve set your sights or focused your attention.
Like a tree that is waiting for one particular branch to grow, but, in the meantime, while that branch seems to take forever to grow 5 inches, the trunk, the roots, and the other branches have been growing by feet.
Never thought of it like that. Iāll keep that in mind from now on.
I listened to StarkQ all night last night and switched it of this morning. I am literally feel my brain processing the information right now. I hope it doesnāt cause a headache.
I havenāt listen to StarkQ all day and yet it is effecting me majorly. First I felt it working on my brain, then I got a headache and then I was horny. Also I feel like stacking which Iām not going to.
Is Spartan in StarkQ?
It is amazing how reconciliation can talk me into screwing myself up. I keep telling myself to just stick with the sub and trust the process but ideas such as ātry this sub insteadā sound so reasonable. But at that point Iām jumping from one sub to another sub just to eventually get back to the sub I was originally using (StarkQ). I had StarkQ playing throughout the night and I woke feeling like something cleared. I believe it was StarkQ but I can be too sure.
I want money, women and independence but what I need is to stop caring about what other people think. Everyone has power over me and I donāt no how to take it back. The judgement of others is my biggest fear. It also feel like there is danger everywhere and its safer to not draw attention to myself which I am good at.
This morning I spoke to our auditor and afterwards I felt like a liability to the business. I work for my fatherās company as an accountant even though I donāt understand it very well but my father simplified for me so that I can have a job. I donāt believe Iām hurting the business because he always tells me that this couldnāt work without me but I canāt help but think they would be better off with somebody who was better. The auditor was asking questions I barely have the answer even though he doesnāt complain either I think I slowing down from doing his job as well. I donāt feel like I should be here, but where do I go and what else can I do?