Gone back to only using Khan TB yesterday, and really anxious right now. I really want today to not have any drama but I’m worried. Didn’t sleep well last night and when I did sleep I had dreams I couldn’t remember.
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Imagine Attack On Titan mixed with Aladdin and that is what my dream was like last night. I was a titan and me and a bunch of Titans were charging a wall. I believe we were trying to escape but not sure from who or what. Next thing I knew after getting over the wall I found myself in the equivalent of Agrabah where I’m being taught parkour moves by someone looking like Prince of Persia who I saw as a big brother.
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I can’t remember what dream I had. I can barely remember if I dreamed at all but I woke up this morning feeling like something has broken away. It’s like something in my head broke loose or free. I feel a headache is about to come on but still I’m not worried. Looking forward to what happens next.
Feeling anxiety right now, but I know why. Had my two final modules for this semester then done with school for good. I know I passed one but haven’t got the result of the other. I just need to see the letter “P” and man it would be such a load off. I feel embarrassed that this is taking up so much of my thoughts but what can I say I really want to be done and I’m kinda worried it won’t be. I know this though; Khan TB has the ability to give you such a big relief it almost brings tears to your eyes. I’m looking forward to that.
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Last night had a dream where I was at my university and there was a critical review assignment that was due and I didn’t do it so I handed nothing in. After that I was at a conference at that same school with a girl who is actually a real-life YouTube personality and it seemed like we were in a relationship but I didn’t realize this at the time and thought we were just friends. Reason being that in real life she is engaged and I knew this in the dream so I asked about him and she got pissed. We then go to the next part of the dream where we are in a public school bathroom with her brushing her teeth and me trying to console her while we were both naked and neither of us cared and she was too pissed to listen to me. She stormed off past a classroom wearing nothing and flipped off a male student.
The next part of the dream I paid for something with and all black card and forgot to take it back but the cashier remembered and gave it back to me sometime later. Then finally in the dream I think I was more in spectator mode not interacting where I was at a mansion of people who created YouTube. The had and old YouTube bill board that they replaced with a more luxurious one craved from stone with gems in it and something about racing a golf cart and it flipping over GTA style. And that’s all.
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Just a while ago some miscommunication happened when I told my father that his business partner was going to be slightly late and he somehow took it as he might not come. I don’t know how and his business partner got annoyed at me. And while I am annoyed at that, I still feel good and the situation isn’t getting me down. Woke up feeling good and still feeling good.
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Had a dream that I can’t remember too much about which is a shame because it was a mixture of John Wick and The Matrix and I think it took place at an airport. Regardless I woke up feeling really good this morning. On Monday I move to Khan TP and I can’t wait lol.
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Started Khan TP early than originally decided. Played it yesterday even and all last night on set and forget. Felt the need to switch subs today and for a while I did and switched back. I switched because I thought nothing was happening. I realized it was reconciliation, still feel the urge to switch but I won’t. Stick with TP.
Yeah lol my bad Khan TR. Thanx for the point out 
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Things are getting hectic at work because of end of year. Accounts need to be closed off, things need to be filed away and a court case next week. Been listening to EV4 since around 9 this morning thinking about putting Khan on hold.
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Decided to stick with only Khan and just tough it out. Wish me all the best.
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Ahhh much appreciated bro 
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Started Khan TR on Saturday didn’t feel anything, Sunday thought I wasn’t feeling anything except the desire to switch subs. I stacked only to go back to only stage 2, yesterday switched only to go back to stage 2 and this morning I felt anxious. Total Reprogramming caught me of guard but I’m decent now at least.
New Years Eve and I have nothing to do nowhere to go no one to be with and I feel angry. Times like this I feel like just using Emperor instead and just say to hell to dating and being social if no one likes me then i don’t like them either. From now on I only think about myself and care only about myself. Then the feeling goes away and I feel better and I think to myself glad I didn’t act on that.
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Khan Stage 2 is truly harder than Stage 1 and showed me that I’m not ready for anything multi-stage. Which is fine because I don’t think what Khan mostly focuses on is what I need right now. Last night I started Emperor V4, had dreams too about New Years Eve where I was out and about and having a good time which was the opposite of what did happen. Also in the dream I saw a sex therapist. That part was weird so I’ll end it there.
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Found out I passed my remaining courses and know its finally over. 
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Your inner state reflects your outer reality. As above, so below. As within so without. It most probably was reconciliation making your below or within feel bad in which your above or without reflected towards those inner feelings. Don’t worry, you’ll be the Khan of your dreams when the inside is healed.
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Thank you for that. That will happen some day but not during 2020 though.