Ignorance is really the foundation of Knowledge.
Not the opposite.
The root and the foundation.
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Back to listening today.
I’d half-wondered if I was just feeling different in the past two days due to very little sleep.
But no. Last night, I got little sleep again. But my mind felt fresher today and ready for another listening day.
So I think it might really have been the case that there was still active processing going on.
Either way. Here we are now.
Sitting in front of my PC at home as I play 7.5 minutes of PHENOMENAUT Genesis and then POOLS Black.
And on the weekend, I’ll try a once per week full-loop exposure to Nouveau R.I.C.H. and see how that works.
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Interestingly, after today’s listening I felt a subtly pleasant buzzy stimulated sensation.
I wonder what will happen next?
(The perennial Unfolding programs question.)
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Thinking that everything needs to happen Right Now is a sign of immature Vision.
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Sometimes you choose to live with a particular hardship.
And then it’s a balancing act. You need to walk the tightrope.
On one side of the tightrope: You basically forget that this was a choice. You begin to curse life. Curse your “fate”. You run into the same patterns of depression, frustration, and blame that plague most people who are under high-stress without sufficient coping skills and resources.
On the other side of the tightrope: You completely lean into your choice. What right do I have to complain? This is all my choice and all my fault. And what point is there in hoping or planning for things to get any better? If I really wanted things to get better, then I wouldn’t have made this choice!
Either direction is following the path of Easy Generalizations.
Suffering is a small price to pay for banishing ambiguity. People will certainly embrace a narrative that is inaccurate and even painful—we will in other words increase Suffering—in exchange for increasing, just the tiniest bit, our sense of Certainty and Predictability.
The challenge is to, instead, remain standing upright in the Uncomfortable Between.
Yes, I made this choice.
And Yes, I had reasons for choosing it.
And Yes, it is painful and uncomfortable.
And Yes, I do wish for things to grow easier.
and Yes, together with all of that, I still, for now, hold to the Values and Views that underlie my Choice.
And All of these can be uncomfortably true at the same time.
And None of this in this slightest, requires me to Curse Myself, to Curse Life and the World, or to Curse Other People and Beings.
Instead, I will live with my painful choices for as long as I continue to see fit.
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And that, for me, is freedom and Free Will.
It is not sexy.
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@Malkuth Are you a philosopher or anything similar by profession?
Your writings are always very profound.
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Thank you, @Detective_L
In this particular case, it’s been nature before nurture. I’ve always been an observer of life and a (struggling) seeker of truth. From what I’ve been able to see, Nature just churns us out with different projects, passions, and orientations. These are mine.
I used to feel weird and alone. Then one day it occurred to me that there were thousands, probably millions of us, most feeling weird and alone.
A funny realization to have.
So, I found pretty early that this is just the way I am, and it appears to be non-negotiable. So, over the years, I’ve tried to seek out contexts, professions, work that would welcome (or at least allow) me to do what I was going to be doing anyway.
That seeking is a process in which I am still very much involved. It’s probably my central quest.
Hence: Revelation of Spirit, Revelation of Mind, and Genesis as the foundational program cores of my foundational custom subliminal. They’re basically the engine and the soul at the center of the whole thing.
Alright, anyway, so that’s that.
If you find anything profound in what I’ve said, it must have resonated with something that was in you before I said anything at all. So I think what you are recognizing may, in fact, be your own profundity.
Either way, let’s keep resonating (and Unfolding).
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Meditation this morning. 8:30 to 9:30 or so.
I’m noticing a definite and unmistakeable development.
If I were guessing I’d say it’s Revelation of Mind, Revelation of Spirit, Stonelike, and Khan Black 2, interacting together.
There’s a physical, somatic settling that’s happening in a very noticeable way. Often by about minute 15 or so, it’s deepening. And then, somewhat independently of the thoughts that fly and flow here and there, I can still notice that physical/experiential settledness.
Hmm… actually, I can still somewhat notice it right now 45 minutes later.
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This for me is the crux:
When, Where, and How to speak up for myself
not posturing
not ‘faking it til I make it’
Clear Vision. Effective Strategy. Strong Base. : Represented and Communicated.
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Forgiveness means: Not being mentally or emotionally enslaved to anything that anyone else does.
It means that whatever you do to me, I’m staying on my own path. And my life is not going to become about you. You don’t get to take over. You can affect me; powerfully affect me. But you never define me.
The external expression of this underlying orientation is: Forgiveness.
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A wonderfully written truth. Amen 
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It’s interesting. I’m in kind of a low place right now. Just mood and situation wise. Seems to be a bit of a theme. We’ll see where this goes.
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It happens, brother! Have a nice little snack. A chocolate or two. You’ll be good in no time.
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So when a person decides to commit revenge, they are enslaved to the person who wronged them?
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I don’t know.
Any course of action could have enslavement behind it. That’s something that each person has to ask and answer within their own mind.
But many won’t get far enough to even ask the question. And that, in itself, probably already answers a little.
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Listened today. 7.5 minutes of Phenomenaut Genesis around 3:30 or 4 pm. And now, 7.5 minutes of Pools Black around 6:30 pm.
Meditation was this morning 8:30 am to 9:30 am.
Discord at home related to money matters. Has given me added stress. A cloud, currently, over me.
Met a past trainee for lunch today. Got to hear some of what he’s been experiencing in his career since we were last in touch.
Then back to this writing. Though I stepped away from it to read some more of Gone Girl. Wanted to get up to the plot twist that I knew was coming. Got to it. Closed the book. Doing my own work again.
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Magickal Meditation Formula
-
Take anything at all in the world
-
After it, add the phrase:
‘….as a phenomenon in the Cosmos.’
- Contemplate it
Use it on anything, even on so-called “distractions” to meditation.
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So today was my first time to start my new plan of one full 15-minute loop of Nouveau R.I.C.H. every Sunday. Once a week.
I woke up at 8 something. Meditated from 9:09 to 10:09. And then walked, indoors, as I listened to the full Nouveau R.I.C.H. loop.
Felt a little wary of running a full-loop. But in the end I chose to see it through.
I have a non-conventional career orientation and social orientation. That’s okay. Just need to keep at it to see how to best make it work.
Actually, by non-conventional, I don’t really mean uncommon. I simply mean ‘at odds to some degree with the most widely accepted norms, customs, and expectations of the general society’. No one lines up with those things perfectly. But some of us are a bit more off the beaten path than others. I’m definitely not at the extreme. I’ve seen people whose choices and lifestyles make me look extremely conventional. Nevertheless, my basic temperament, mind, and nature have never fit very well in any conventional institutions or contexts that I’ve ever encountered. It has been a continual challenge from life to ‘Define and Create The Conditions That Suit You Best’. I’m still learning to meet that challenge.
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Just making a quick entry.
Things are getting busier at work.
Some of the conflict at home blew over, and my level of circulating cortisol decreased as well, thankfully.
Did my third time today with 7.5 minute loops of Phenomenaut Genesis and Pools Black. Which means that next time, I may increase to 10 minutes. We’ll see how I’m feeling in the next 2 days.
It’s been one of those time periods in which you’re not seeing any clear external indications of how things will change, and your internal resources are feeling average, but not miraculous. So, you question, and you doubt.
At the same time, interestingly, the meditation practice is flowing and deepening in its own way. But I just like to keep that as a very natural and unassuming part of life. Like the ebb and flow of the waves or the phases of the moon. Just let it be part of the foundation.
I’m not “using” meditation for anything. And I don’t want to. Just let it be what it is.
It’s like a VIP. I’m just glad it’s coming around.
Meanwhile, what I’m looking to more is my gradually increasing capacity to make moves in the world. And you know? That comes down largely to two things:
Conversations.
Problem-solving.
That’s pretty much what working and projects are about.
With whom do you wish to interact?
And what kinds of problems are you motivated to solve?
just managing those.
Okay. Gotta run.
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