I just spent 11 minutes and 56 seconds and watched that video. (Time to get back to work now after writing this post.)
I do not see any contradictions in what she is saying. Each of her points makes logical sense.
She seems to be calling for greater nuance in the conversation on self-love.
For full-disclosure, I do not have much familiarity with this person, her history, or her general comportment as a human being. I don’t know any gossip about her background. So, she may have done terrible things and I would not know about it.
But the ideas she’s expressing in this video are accurate and I agree with them.
Trying to reduce the complexity of human needs to simple, non-contradictory logical formulae and constructs will always fail. We are complex systems that arise out of dialectical tension. It’s just the way things are.
When she discusses the value of self-love closer to the end of the video, I think that she’s simply talking about cognitive frames, filters, and schema and how they play into Confirmation Bias. (The so-called ‘self-fulfilling prophecy’ effect that we use so effectively when we’re working with subliminals.) But rather than approaching these concepts simplistically and reductively, she’s placing them within a more complex and nuanced context.
It’s good to have principles; but it’s Procrustean foolishness to flatten yourself and the world to be only the dimensions of those principles. A person who does this will become an uncomfortable caricature of themself.
So, I listened to the whole thing, and did not hear a contradiction. She was never saying that self-love is not important or is not a valuable capacity that is worthy of development. Her point is about the specific idea that “self-love” is a strict pre-requisite for being able to find, receive, or experience love from others.
She’s downgrading it from a strict precondition, to ‘one of many influential factors’. If her argument were expressed in the form of Statistical Science she would be saying: ‘Self-Love is not a mediator for receiving and experiencing love from others; rather, self-love is a moderator for receiving love from others.’ In other words, it does wield influence on the outcome, but it does not absolutely determine the outcome.
Spartan, warrior types often like to use Shame, Blame, or Harshness to motivate themselves and others to get into action. It’s a valid strategy that sometimes works. But it’s just a strategy. It’s not ‘right’ or ‘wrong’.
“If you don’t do [X], your life’s never going to work out!”
Okay.
Sometimes that can motivate people, but it’s usually hyperbolic.
and when I say protection I mean in it in two senses first short term situations , 2 long span of events that take weeks or more when I look back I found everything were arranged in the best possible way to generate the most beneficial result for me . LB is magnificent to say the least . But I don’t know if it includes protection aura . But love itself is protection on in its own . It’s more than protection to be precise it’s life enhancing .