That was 11 minutes of my life that I will never get back. This video is nothing but Teal Swan babbling about self-love and proving that she does not understand the concept. At the end of the video, she ends up contradicting what she started the video with. How do you claim that other people don’t understand self-love and you end up saying the same things that those people said?
She tried to debunk a concept and made a fool of herself instead. That was painful to watch.
Hard pass on that lady!
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I think she brings a useful degree of nuance to a complex topic that frequently gets over simplified, thanks for sharing.
What nuance? She literally repeated the same thing she what trying to debunk. What did she say that any serious thinker wasn’t saying already?
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I plan to. It’s an overall wonderful sub that works well in just about any combo I can think of. It is working well with my current stack with my LotS/GLM custom and Heartsong/my Primal Seduction custom (currently switching these out each cycle).
The only thing that I can presently see myself switching it out for will be to resume Khan Black.
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Teal Swan grew up Mormon and now heads her own cult.
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I have heard about her a long time ago. I watched a few of her videos. I was never impressed. 
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Don’t even bother, lol.
lol
This woman is a self-proclaimed “survivor of severe childhood abuse”. Her Instagram is full of feminism, very common for a woman who has experienced traumatic relationships with men. On her wiki page “From an early age, she has claimed to have extrasensory abilities, including telepathy and the ability to communicate with the deceased. Her teaching methods sometimes guide participants to envision their own deaths, occasionally by suicide.”
“What in god’s name.”
That was my response while watching the video, and while doing a 2 minute background check.
Common sense. If something sounds like bullshit, and you sniff it out and find more bullshit - it’s safe to say that it’s all bullshit.
I can objectively disprove each of her points in a calm and collected manner, but I won’t even give all of them the time of day - as it’s not worth my time.
Let me just point out that her 2nd point for debunking self-love, was that:
- Fundamentally there is no self, and no other. If we’re all one because we’re all made up of the same “conscious energy”, then there is no difference between loving yourself and loving someone else. At the end of the day, every form of love is self-love and loving yourself is no different than loving another.
And this my friends… is what we call "spiritual bypass."
Spiritual bypass: “the tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks”.
This is a whole bunch of impractical, overcomplicated, and inapplicable nonsense.
This is dangerous. Her attempt to “debunk” the importance of self-love (lack of self-love being an unresolved issue in majority of society) through a method of spiritual bypass, promotes the idea of avoiding internal issues. This is the type of self-proclaimed “New Thought Leader” folks are tuning into.
So let me get this straight. If I have deep emotional traumas, voids, and internal lack that I’m trying to desperately fill as a man, and go express my love for the pretty lady at the bar… then this is “self-love.” This is her “debunking”, lol.
Ask yourself if that makes sense.
So if I love everyone else, and constantly do favors for everyone, give them money, put their own needs before mine, and not have any boundaries… then this is self-love because I’m loving all of them. This is according to her 2nd point, lol. Ask yourself if that makes sense.
We all know that self-love would mean taking time out for yourself, giving yourself space, and not neglecting your own needs. We all know the distinction, in a practical sense. She is overcomplicating for the sake of “debunking”, not for the sake of actually providing a readily applicable insight in the realm of self-help to her viewers.
This world is starved of self-love, just look at society. The last thing we need is a “debunking” of self-love, that doesn’t even provide viable arguments. The only reason why one would be interested in such debunking, is if they were looking for excuses and justification to avoid addressing their own internal issues.
So what’s next? “Debunking The Take-Action Myth”?
Every person with a logical brain understands that if you are a person who is constantly in a negative state of not liking yourself, not feeling deserving of love, unable to accept your flaws, hyper-critical about yourself, etc on a subconscious level, then your experience will most of the time reflect this back to you subconsciously. This is not a myth, this is basic psychology.
Negative thoughts and beliefs about yourself, can strongly influence how you interpret situations, interact with others, and how you experience life. It cannot get any more simple, this is basic psychology.
I am extremely curious as to which particular point people are resonating with in this video. I am also extremely curious, as to which of the points made in the video they are actively applying and living by with great success in the development of their own healthy, fulfilling, non-toxic relationships + attracting of love… along with backed up evidence. I am willing to bet a million dollars that my curiosity will be met with nothing that is not already expected.
My backed up evidence self-love, is all of the testimonials on this forum with Love Bomb or Heartsong where a person cultivated self-love (actually did the work) and began to attract love from other people. Obviously this makes sense because of Zero Point, and how everything is a reflection.
Don’t take crazy people on the internet’s word for anything. Don’t watch her video and then dismiss Love Bomb. Go and run Love Bomb, and see for yourself. Come to your own conclusions.
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That hidden detail I wrote mainly for the other folks, not you.
The people who watch the video and start coming to conclusions. You know how it is, lol.
Next thing you know, someone who desperately needs self-love work is going to see this video and think to themselves “oh wait a second, it’s debunked… so I don’t have to work on this.”
“Welp, time to take Love Bomb out of my stack”.
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@Skadoosh : Makes me think that anyone can start a cultish movement. There are always people who will be ready to follow. When I saw “Debunk self-love”, I thought: “Oh great! Something thought-provoking and paradigm shifting”. I just wasn’t expecting something that underwhelming and so poorly thought out.
I feel bad for her followers.
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Everything a person looks for outside of themselves becomes very secondary once they learn to love themselves
I feel a lot of people think self love is arrogance or narcissism. It’s not at all. People who love themselves don’t need videos like that or any other external source of validation.
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Agree 100%. She is a false teacher who is very poorly educated. She does not understand anything related to psychology, neither to spirituality.
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There are some good books written about that very subject. “Expert Secrets” by Russell Brunson is that. Borrowing ideas from cults and the such to make your products more compelling.
David Barron/Dantalion Jones wrote a book on it too. Ostensibly for learning what to watch out for in terms of cult influence.
Great reads, if for no other reason than to know when one tries to use that stuff on you.
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I am very familiar with Russell Brunson. I am one of the people who say that Clickfunnels is cult masquerading as a marketing platform.
When I first joined up on Clickfunnels, I told my friend/business partner “This has the same exact vibe as when I was in Network Marketing company. The same ‘Rah Rah’ type of motivation.” And that was before Expert Secrets ever came out 
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the fourth cycles on LB ，the discernment script is coming through…I really feel that the negativity being resolved…those shameness，embarrassment，self loath that used to cloud my mind ，now it is being decluttered…I can think straight and clear without being influenced by the constant naysaying in my head …those defense mechanism is not firing off…self acceptance become so natural…it is automatic…something comes up，I just accept it …
the synchronicity is increasing…a lot of time，it just feels weirdly off… like yesterday，I was doing my meditation.in my mind ，I thought of a family friend who haven’t seen for a long time…within minutes，the doorbell rang，that person came to visit…oftentimes，I couldn’t figure it out…it is a manifestation or me having the increasing intuition due to the stronger connection/relationship between conscious mind and subconscious mind …or maybe both ？ who knows ？ 
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Russell Brunson intentionally modeled ClickFunnels to be like Network Marketing. As a matter of fact he almost got involved in Network Marketing after he got invited to a Network Marketing event by another Mormon. Russell loved the Network Marketing vibe. Instead of joining the Network Marketing company he was invited to, he co-founded ClickFunnels and marketed it like they market an MLM.
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Saints and Psychopaths by the great Bill Hamilton is another must-read.
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I just spent 11 minutes and 56 seconds and watched that video. (Time to get back to work now after writing this post.)
I do not see any contradictions in what she is saying. Each of her points makes logical sense.
She seems to be calling for greater nuance in the conversation on self-love.
For full-disclosure, I do not have much familiarity with this person, her history, or her general comportment as a human being. I don’t know any gossip about her background. So, she may have done terrible things and I would not know about it.
But the ideas she’s expressing in this video are accurate and I agree with them.
Trying to reduce the complexity of human needs to simple, non-contradictory logical formulae and constructs will always fail. We are complex systems that arise out of dialectical tension. It’s just the way things are.
When she discusses the value of self-love closer to the end of the video, I think that she’s simply talking about cognitive frames, filters, and schema and how they play into Confirmation Bias. (The so-called ‘self-fulfilling prophecy’ effect that we use so effectively when we’re working with subliminals.) But rather than approaching these concepts simplistically and reductively, she’s placing them within a more complex and nuanced context.
It’s good to have principles; but it’s Procrustean foolishness to flatten yourself and the world to be only the dimensions of those principles. A person who does this will become an uncomfortable caricature of themself.
So, I listened to the whole thing, and did not hear a contradiction. She was never saying that self-love is not important or is not a valuable capacity that is worthy of development. Her point is about the specific idea that “self-love” is a strict pre-requisite for being able to find, receive, or experience love from others.
She’s downgrading it from a strict precondition, to ‘one of many influential factors’. If her argument were expressed in the form of Statistical Science she would be saying: ‘Self-Love is not a mediator for receiving and experiencing love from others; rather, self-love is a moderator for receiving love from others.’ In other words, it does wield influence on the outcome, but it does not absolutely determine the outcome.
Spartan, warrior types often like to use Shame, Blame, or Harshness to motivate themselves and others to get into action. It’s a valid strategy that sometimes works. But it’s just a strategy. It’s not ‘right’ or ‘wrong’.
“If you don’t do [X], your life’s never going to work out!”
Okay.
Sometimes that can motivate people, but it’s usually hyperbolic.
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The Guru-Follower relationship is a collaborative dance that is the fault (or the accomplishment, in those cases where it works out well) of all parties involved.
If you choose to give up your personal, independent judgment in favor of someone else’s views and choices, then sooner or later you’re going to bump into the consequences of that person’s personality and personal limitations. It does not matter how logical or virtuous that person may happen to be. You gave them your steering wheel. You wanted a Mommy or Daddy to have the answers.
But if you hold onto your own sovereignty, then almost everyone becomes a teacher of some valuable lesson. And you can make the decisions of when, where, and how far to learn from them. Based on your judgment and learning process. Not based on their so-called perfection.
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Didn’t think I’d see teal pop up in a love bomb thread. She gives me bad vibes all around. I had a friend that was addicted to her. Kindly ask people not to derail this great love bomb thread with attention on her bs.
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