Didn’t even know that I had this journal, lol.
Recently swapped True Sell with Stark.
Current stack: Khan + Stark + Nouveau R.I.C.H.
Taking a long break from the forum.
I’ve recently had new and thought-provoking insights about growth in general.
Environments, dissonance, growth, baselines and incongruence.
Internal dissonance and lack of tolerance with your environment, are the strongest indicators of incongruence.
Environment A: Full of porn addicts that constantly express themselves through a frame of unhealthy sexuality.
Person A: Internally congruent with a healthy sexuality.
Person B: Internally congruent with an unhealthy sexuality.
When Person A walks into Environment A, they will experience massive amounts of dissonance and a lack of tolerance for the environment and beliefs within it. This is because they’re incongruent with the environment due to being congruent with a healthy sexuality. The greater that disconnect, the more dissonance and lack of tolerance they would experience.
Example: A person who is increasingly committed to a healthy lifestyle would experience a greater disconnect with an environment promoting unhealthy behaviors and would exhibit higher levels of dissonance and lack of tolerance. This is natural and a true testament to their congruence and commitment to their beliefs.
Person B doesn’t experience any dissonance and has a strong tolerance, because there is no internal clash between their subconscious beliefs, values, and the environment in which they’re in whatsoever. Everything is completely normal to Person B, and it’s just another day in the office.
When a person experiences cognitive dissonance due to a misalignment between their internal framework and the behaviors or attitudes of their environment, they typically respond in 3 ways:
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Change to Fit the Environment: The person might attempt to reduce dissonance by adapting their beliefs, behaviors and internal framework to align more closely with the prevailing attitudes in their environment. This could involve compromising their own values to fit in or avoid conflict.
In Person A’s case, they would become internally congruent with an unhealthy sexuality to fit in with the environment, or put on a mask and fake it to fit in (fear of rejection).
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Attempt to Raise the Environment: The person might choose to influence their environment positively. They may advocate for different behaviors, share their values, or try to raise awareness about the benefits of a different lifestyle. This approach involves an attempt to bring the environment more in line with the person’s own values and internal framework.
In Person A’s case, they will raise awareness about the benefits of a healthy sexuality, and the negatives of a unhealthy sexuality. They will attempt to move the goal-post and standard for internal sexuality of the environment through influence and advocating.
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Leave the Environment: If they don’t change to fit the environment, and their attempts to bring the environment more in line with their values fail - then they simply leave the environment. Otherwise, they will always be in a strong state of dissonance and lack of tolerance. It’s too far of a clash, and it’s heavily subconscious because it’s based on subconscious beliefs (real congruence/incongruence). Usually, they will leave the environment to find a different environment that is more aligned with their internal framework. This is natural in many stages of growth, which most people experience in particular with old social circles, friend groups, company around them, etc through various stages of life.
In Person A’s case, they will leave the environment full of porn addicts and unhealthy sexuality. They will then find a new environment that promotes healthy sexuality and is full of sexually healthy people.
What Person A is incapable of doing, is experiencing zero dissonance like Person B. It’s an objective mechanism taking place of framework clash on a subconscious level, an indicator of being truly congruent with one’s values. It’s impossible to avoid. The greater the disconnect, the stronger it is.
This applies to anything, not just sexuality. It could be:
- Life standards
- Moral or ethical standards
- Health and lifestyle
- Common sense standards
- Practicality standards
- etc
Although it’s an internal framework clash… in a sense your internal framework = your reality, so it is more so of a reality clash or at least it’s interesting to look at it like that. Might even be better as it puts into perspective the inescapable part of it in relation to congruence.
Still figuring it out but this was nice to write out and keep in the know-how.
