I can very much relate. Grind to live is shit.
Especially if you’ve ideas, plans, ambitions that go sour because you can’t work on them.
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(How) Do you “store” your ideas, visions, projects?
I write stuff in a journal, but a couple of months later, this spark and the energy that comes with it (in the sense of Hesse: “And in all beginnings indwells a magic”) is mostly gone.
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I don’t really store them. I just think about stuff deeply.
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So I just finished reading “The Richest Man Who Ever Lived,” a book about Jakob Fugger. His net worth at the peak was the equivalent of over $400B in today’s money.
As I read the book, I found myself thinking about which of the 48 Laws of Power I saw in action.
He really did well with making himself Indispensible to others.
And not showing all his cards too soon.
Still thinking…
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Had a dream last night. Dreamt I was in a house I knew in the dream as my house. Primary residence, etc.
The house seemed very familiar and definitely felt like home. A small house.
At some point, I started wondering about the upstairs. Which apparently it was like discovering for the first time my house HAD an upstairs. But more like I knew in the back of my head about it and just forgot or hadn’t thought of the upstairs in a very long time.
I found my way upstairs, and the upstairs was somehow way larger than the ground floor. Like at least 5x or 10x as big. And I kept exploring the different rooms. Found a bathroom and got giddy “I have another bathroom! I can shit in peace!”
At one point, I decided to #2 (lol) and realized the bathroom door won’t shut. So I’m sitting there doing my business, and the door won’t shut, and at one point I realize the door is suddenly like a sliding privacy curtain, but only shuts like 5 inches.
And suddenly there are people in the adjoining room, sorta like a dining room. They’re having a dinner party, and keep glancing at me, half-disgusted, and half-laughing, at seeing me shit in my bathroom.
The remainder of the dream is realizing that upstairs is largely in a state of disarray, “There’s a lotta work I gotta do up here to make this place liveable!”
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Finally feel ready to break my washout. Will do Primal, PS, Chosen.
747 posts on the dot. @RVconsultant or @DarkPhilosopher please close this journal, and I’ll BOEING over to a new one after running this stack 
EDIT: decided on 3 mins each of Primal, PS, Chosen, Heartsong, IrresistiBILL.
EDIT: I ran it. and wow. feeling wired as fuck. Feeling sexual. Can definitely see myself making this my stack for a cycle. Shuffling it each listen day to keep the SubC fresh. I’d add in Khan black if I wasn’t at 5 titles already.
This is gon be fun though.
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I wonder, have you tried a full 15 minutes?
I’m still waiting on this journal to be closed. I’m at a new one now
I have done everything from 10 seconds to 15 mins for ZP, and hours on the old-ass tech. I’ve done it all, baby.
Ok, you can call me that 
I am asking because I recently discovered that for me 3 minutes is just underexposure and I am fully capable of doing the full 15 minutes. And I see results much faster than before.
I find subs seem to work faster with full 15. But I listen to shorter ones to get em all in a day. It’s a trade-off I’m willing to make most times.
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Stand by…
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