KHAN + WANTED. Foxdie's Journal

Journals - Major Programs
#162

Khan ST1 - Day 31
Limitless - Day 3

  1. I can’t study, I lack motivation, concentration and my memory seems worse lately. The only thing I can think about is , having fun and hitting on girls.
    [no PMO days: 8]
#163
  1. I feel a strong despair towards women, it has already happened to me with ST1. Lack of women + no PMO is having this effect on me. I feel I need a woman and I want it with extreme desperation.
#164

Remember or imagine a situation where you feel highly irresistible all the women want you your the man…

Its an effective nlp technique to change negative emotion into positive one.

You can save the feeling when you press your index f. and thumb together f.e. and say a codeword (irresistible mode)

When you do that again and say the word you can put those feelings out better to change your mood

3 Likes
#165

I stopped mixing khan and wanted for this very reason.

I am in a couple, free relationship since 11 years and yet since I listen to wanted I had this emotion a bit needy, of approval of the others whereas I am not like that in normal time and especially when I used khan alone.

I’m done with wanted, khan already gives very good results, on the dominant side it’s madness and strength of character, that thing that women like.
Not all of them of course, there are some who like kittens and they are not my target.
And a little anecdote that dates from before I used wanted proof that it shows on the outside.

I was in the break room, the machine gave me a disgusting cocoa, the hotel manager came up behind me and said “Manuel, have a coffee, that’s what suits you best, a dominant drink”, then he talked to me about possible prospects for development.

From now on I stay with Khan/love bomb/libertine/muaythaï, nothing else.

I’m focused right now on st2 and st3, no recon
since I have been supplementing with various vitamins.

1 Like
#166

Interesting. I’ll try it.

#167

Khan ST1 - Rest Day - (Days done 31)
Limitless - Rest Day - (Days done 3)

  1. I’m thinking too much about the girl of the party and I feel guilty thinking about her because of the fight we had. My mind is slightly obsessed with her but you know what I’m telling you my little stupid girl? I owe you nothing, I owe you no explanations for the fight, I owe you no explanations in general and I owe you anything. There’s a problem with my Frame when it comes to her. My current frame is "I owe her explanations, I owe her an apology, I owe her something, and I have to be careful what I tell her and how I justify myself to her otherwise I won’t be able to win her back, weeee weee weee * crying * ". But fuck it, she is a stupid, she doesn’t deserve all my mental investment, the other time after making my apologies she had the courage to be precious and not accept them even trying to make me feel guilty. She doesn’t deserve anything from me.
    My frame will be the following for her and for many others from now: ""I don’t owe you anything, I don’t owe you any explanations, I don’t owe you excuses, I don’t owe you a drink or anything else, and indeed I don’t want “nothing” from you unless you prove to me that you are a worthy person and then maybe I could think about it. I live for myself not for you or for others and it is precisely for this reason that I do not owe you anything, and the date we will do is to test you and verify that you are enough for me, that you are one that is good for me , you will be the one who has to make a good impression on me ””.

  2. I slept a little more than usual, I felt tired, and then I studied, I felt a little motivated to do it

1 Like
#168
  1. Seeing a beautiful girl tonight working at a restaurant where I was eating at I understood one thing: I want women like her in my life, so beautiful, charming and classy, ​​but …, there is always a but, I don’t feel enough for women like this, I feel that they are too beautiful for me, that I am not at their level for what I am. For this reason I am always afraid to text girls on instagram, because I fear that they will reject me and ignore me and going to feed my (negative) belief that I am not capable, that I am not enough, I am not beautiful enough, I am not rich enough, I have not enough status. I don’t see myself as sexual being, I’m afraid of something inside of me and even though there are some girls looking at me sometimes the best I can think of myself is that I might be cute but then everything else is non-existent, I feel a paralysis and I don’t know what to do, all I feel is doubt and fear of failing or being rejected.
1 Like
#169

Khan ST1 - Day 32
Limitless - Day 3

  1. I woke up very tired after 8 hours of sleep and even slept a little in the afternoon. Towards the evening I felt different, I felt a state of flaw where I let my personality run wild without trying to say anything unwillingly to impress others, I wanted to be simply and naturally myself saying what I wanted to say without effort and doing it with my normal tone of voice without having to raise it. I was in tune with the environment and out of my head.

  2. I approached two girls, there was my female friend with me, I started the approach and then after that I felt a little uncomfortable and didn’t know what to say anymore, total blank in my mind, my friend spoke for most of the time, then we said goodbye and left.
    I am hungry, I want more!

#170

Khan ST1 - Day 33
Limitless - Day 4

  1. I have been waking up tired, late and more in need of rest every morning for a few days. I decided to reduce the loops to 3 per week instead of 4, for each sub with 2 days of rest as a deadlift.

  2. I feel like my soul is crying.

  3. I started studying again, albeit in minimal quantities.

  4. I have been feeling in an emotional stalemate for some time now. I have no desire or goal that I want to pursue, I wake up in the morning and I don’t know what I want to do. Total indifference to life.

#171

Khan ST1 - Rest Day - (Days done 33)
Limitless - Rest Day - (Days done 4)

  1. I am reevaluating a lot of people in my life completely and they are not people for me. For example the last girl I was with, I don’t care if she is hot, she can go fuck herself as far as I’m concerned, because her behavior and the person she is disgusts me.

  2. Khan ST1 is driving me away from any kind of negative influence or programming, be it people or media. I can no longer read the redpill forums, that I didn’t read from a loooong time and I tried to read it again today, because of its negativity; and the only thought of being with false and incoherent, needy, negative and judgmental people or freeloaders make me sick.

2 Likes
#172

Khan ST1 - Rest Day 2– (Days done 33)
Limitless - Rest Day 2 - (Days done 4)

  1. I’m forcing myself to approach girls or text them just out of the desire to have one (even when I’m not horny or don’t feel like girls at the moment), mine is just self-restraint and it’s getting so forced and unnatural , in fact then I don’t approach them because I put too much pressure on myself. I don’t think it’s the right way.

  2. I feel my way of communicating is changing. I no longer put emphasis on words by accentuating the word with an increase in pitch in the voice and try to say what I think in as few words as possible.

  3. I respond to people who try to get cocky with me, I no longer like to shut up and let people put their feet on my head.

#173

Khan ST1 - Rest Day - (Days done 34)
Limitless - Rest Day - (Days done 5)

  1. What I am feeling now is a great desire to search for women but at the same time I feel a subtle fear that blocks me from looking for them.
    I have the desire to learn new social skills with women and improve myself.

  2. Last night I was watching Baki the grappler (2018) and in the first episode of the anime they talked about synchronicity.

  3. I admit after all this time that I analyze myself that I have a strong victim mentality. Instead of focusing on what to do and how to get one thing, I focus too much on why I shouldn’t make it and that limits me every time. My focus is in the wrong direction.
    Note to myself: A better change of mindset should be to focus exclusively on what I want to achieve without thinking for a moment what limitations there are (or I believe there are, because many times it is just my false belief).
    Focus, focus only on what I want and on the plan to execute, there must be no space or time to think about possible limitations. Do I want X? I have to do Y, there is no Z limitation, it’s all in my mind.
    FOCUS!

1 Like
#174

Khan ST1 - Rest Day 2 - (Days done 34)
Limitless - Rest Day 2 - (Days done 5)

  1. Also this morning I woke up very tired even though I had slept more than enough and during the night I had a lot of dreams.
    My listening schedule is one day of listening and 2 of rest.

  2. I think I understand by now that my fears and doubts are as follows:
    • Fear of rejection.
    • Fear of success (I have been single for a long time and my subconscious is frightened of the idea that I have a woman and sabotages me every time).
    • Lack of self-acceptance: I don’t feel aesthetically attractive enough, despite some people said to me that I am not bad looking, or having other things that people have like a job/money or status/friends.
    • And who knows what other hidden negative beliefs …
    What should I do now? Do I act in any way to dispel these fears or let the sub do his job?

#175
  1. As a consequence of the above fears I often find myself reacting a lot to people, seeking their attention and worse trying to impress them. This happens in particular with people who I consider to be of higher value than me: beautiful girls, smart guys or those who know how to do it, etc …
    I would like to experience my interactions in a relaxed and natural way without feeling the need to impress anyone, even if for example I like a girl.
#176

  1. When I look at the girls on the street, so well dressed, elegant and beautiful, what I feel is that we live in two separate dimensions, as if we are separated by bubbles that surround us and these bubbles that separate us, prevent me or make me feel impossible to enter their world. I feel that getting them into my life or me into their life is so complicated, I feel like we live in separate dimensions that are impossible to access.

  2. I am going through a period of strong reconciliation, I have strong doubts about myself and I don’t feel comfortable or myself in social contexts, it seems as if my whole life is collapsing on me due to these enormous doubts.

#177

Khan ST1 - Rest Day– (Days done 35)
Limitless - Rest Day - (Days done 6)

  1. I had a lot of dreams last night, I remember some of them had to do with school.

  2. I have a little feeling of neediness back towards a girl. When I look at her insta profile I feel that I need her attention. I hope this thing does not degenerate.
    But where does this come from? Lack of girls in my life that leads me to fixate on just one? Or my desperate need for affection and attention due to the absolute lack of such things in my life and the desire to be appreciated by the girls? (Which in fact never happens to me, I seem to be almost invisible sometimes). My past is also involved: I have had confirmation of failure too many times with girls and this creates desperation in me, but to be realistic I have to remember that I had some girlfriends in the past, but what did they like about me then?

  3. Lately I have this habit of consciously analyzing myself by asking myself questions to understand where my limiting beliefs come from (as in point 2, above).

  4. I feel calmer towards myself, less negative or critical, if I think I have a problem I rationally try to understand why I have it, why I limit myself, etc … I still have some insecurities, like fear to texting unknown girls, however in total I see some small improvements.

#178

  1. Now I remember another dream: there was a girl I know from a friend, who in the dream complained to me because I had followed her on instagram but I never tried to hot on her and I never tried to know her.

  2. I am thinking about it and it seems to me that as I have already established, I am afraid to show my sexual interest, even just flirting or subtly implying that I am interested scares me. It almost seems like I want to live my life hiding, but why this fear? What scares me about showing interest in people (women)? Any traumatic past experience where I had exposed myself too much? Or the conviction of not being attractive and that therefore a regection is inevitable?
    I have noticed that I have small difficulties even giving small compliments to girls. In my head, everything that goes beyond a certain threshold activates a little voice in my head that tells me “beware! If you do this or say this you might make her believe that you are hitting on her! ”, But then I wonder: is there anything wrong with showing interest in girls from time to time? As long as it’s not done desperately or in a creepy way it should be okay. I think I also got brainwashed by some PUA teachings, which advised me to show complete and active disinterest. I took it inside me to a toxic level.

1 Like
#179

Check out the tv show californication
Was a big game changer for me.

Hank moody showed me how to sexualize…

After clearing out some bullshit it goes almost naturally.

The important part for me was overcoming how other people think about me…
Im not 100% there yet but i made a huuuuge
Step to an awesome future

1 Like
#180

This is great. Thanks for the advice, I’ll take a look at it :smiley:

#181

Someone mentioned the tao of steve is also great.
Im saving this one up when i have more listening time with PS

1 Like