KHAN + WANTED. Foxdie's Journal

Journals - Major Programs
#242

Today report

(Ascension - Rest Day 2– (Days done 8)
Limitless - Rest Day 2– (Days done 17)

  1. I fell into a slight depression, because of the women and lack of them. I have no motivation, I don’t want to do anything. I’m sad because I never meet anyone special, like my friend yesterday who introduced me to a great girl.

  2. I desperately need to feel wanted, because no do it with me.

  3. I am angry. I’m starting to have a sense of carelessness towards others, I only care about myself.

  4. The truth is that I don’t care about anything, I don’t want to know what the other people are doing, how they are or anything else, I am only interested in female attention out of pure biological and emotional need. Others don’t interest me, it’s selfish but I don’t care.

  5. I want a girl who is interested and intrigued by me as I saw a guy I know did last night. What a anger!
    My friend’s girlfriend, (mentioned in the point (1)) gave me curious looks… Why can’t I ever find girls like that? Why do occasions never lead me to such girls? Fuck !!!

  6. I’m starting to not want human contact, to not give a damn about others. Honestly, I don’t feel any curiosity in anyone, I don’t admire anyone, I don’t feel the need to look for anyone, I speak mainly of males. I want women, I want their bodies, I want to have sex with them, but I also want love from them, but I don’t feel like putting up with the thousand bullshit and life stories of girls, fuck … avoid this bullshit please, I don’t have mental energy to listen to your things. My mind it’s going to explode!
    I can’t bond with anyone.

2 Likes
#243

I feel like at this point, the emotions needs to be worked on.

It seems like you snowballed to some bad patterns of thoughts and you are stuck in it.

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#244

What do you suggest to me?

#245

Hmmm, honestly it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what would do it for you, I would suggest the book Feeling good, by David Burns. Or you could get help by a psychotherapist. Maybe juat writing an emotion journal would help you… It’s hard to tell. But the book feeling good really helped me :wink:

If you don’t put your emotions back in place, there are chances that your manifestation pathway closes. And I don’t mean that in a magical sense, literally, if your mind is wired to see things negatively, it will be very very hard (nearly impossible) to do stuff that you are not used to do (like growing as a person, getting more woman, etc.).

You need to be in the right headspace to fight the dragon (a.k.a. life).

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#246

I don’t think I’m at such drastic levels, I think I’m just under stress and strong reconciliation. I see how it goes in the next few days.
Thank for the book suggestion :slight_smile:

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#247

Hello! I feel like you’re making great progress, you’re very self-aware. If I may give a suggestion the sedona method might be of great value for you. To let go of those repressed emotions. :slight_smile:

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#248

Thank you!
What it is about?

#249

No problem, yeah you are right, in that case, just be careful, growth is supposed to be fun and motivating :wink:

Edit: And a painful… No pain No gain

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#250

It’s a simple technique to let go of negative emotions and limiting beliefs. It’s easy and quite fun to do :slight_smile:

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#251

Seems cool. I search for it.

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#252

  1. Despite the lack of women I can say that I see a positive fact that my will has been strengthened. I notice this in training, in the current no PMO and also in not submitting to the will of others, for example today I again quarreled and fought for my freedom and independence with my mother, and I do not tolerate being told what to do again, only I decide.

  2. I am noticing the fact of spitting in people’s faces certain things that I think at times.

  3. I was left with a kind of big emptiness in my chest after the pain I felt, a kind of residual pain or heavy cloud in my chest.

  4. I have known this for a long time but I attach too much importance to the authorities. Sometimes I don’t want to argue with them or act like myself and instead do everything polite. No no no … this thing ends now, because those remain people, like me. They are not gods.

2 Likes
#253

I decided to run Limitless Executive U instead of Limitless because what I really need is motivation for studing, and Limitless is not helping in this right now.
I added to Ascension, PS:IT. These two are in preparation for Khan ST2

Ascension - Day 10
Primal Seduction: IT - Rest Day– (Days done 1)

  1. I dreamed of being with a friend robbing the top floor of a bankrupt company, where there was no one. We opened the giant safe in one room and it was full of foreign money. After recovering two bags from the surroundings, we filled them with the contents of the safe in a hurry, because an alarm sounded. Then a mature, hot policewoman showed up looking for us. I was hiding from her between the rooms but then she caught me. She was initially grumpy towards me and she threatened me but then I approached and “seduced her”! I sat on the edge of a bathtub with her on my thighs, docile and in love with me. Her behavior had completely changed, she was attracted and relaxed to be with me, she seemed happy and excited, I took my hand and started to slip it into the edge of her pants with the aim of fingering her and she was standing and was about to go crazy! But at a certain point my father came in and interrupted us, and sorry I said goodbye and left. (I have noticed that in dreams during a sexual act someone always comes to interrupt. There is some discomfort with my sexuality or sex).
    Back home I realize that there was no money in the stolen bag but only a book. I start reading the project for a cannon in it and it materializes and accidentally shoots a girl, killing her. Shocked by what happened, I wish time would go back and it actually happens. Everything I wanted materialized. I read the cover and find it written “book of knowledge”, so I try to materialize a couple of 50 bills and shortly after out of my gaze, they appear!
    My friend had the money but I had everything. That power scared me a little and I promised myself that I would use it with caution so as not to get too used to luxury, because in easy things there is no satisfaction and also because asking for everything immediately was too big a step to accept.
2 Likes
#254

Save PSIT once you have a solid foundation with Primal Seduction you need the healing that’s in that script .

#255

I used for several month Khan ST1 for healing before this, it isn’t the same?

#256

You did good in running that but you still have blockages that st1 hasnt cleared all the way you could have continued St1 or run PS and save psit once your troubles with women have drastically improved

I have 2 months of st1 and 3 months of PS under my belt and i still feel like that’s not enough

If you arent taking action also that can extend the amount of time needed to run them

1 Like
#257

So okay, I’ll take your advice and use PS.

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#258

Ascension - Day 11
Primal Seduction - Day 1

  1. Knowing how the world works, and in particular the world of relationships between men and women, I understand that women are said to have sexual power over us males. I feel a strong desire to want to find a loophole and break these rules and have the power.
    Another question that arises is: is it possible that we have been conditioned to think that power belongs to women? What if it were actually males but society was hiding their potential for some reason? I have to take into account and believe in this eventuality, which is me, male, who has the power over women, as opposed to other males in society. Subconscious, find me a solution!

  2. When I see a beautiful girl, I feel a slight sense of rejection, something inside me tells me “you are not her kind of guy, she goes out with those more beautiful and fashionable than you”, “For her you are a loser”, “you are not enough for such a girl.” This little voice often belittles me.
    Another thing I noticed for some women (especially the beautiful ones) still see them as “gods”. I’m afraid to text them or just to get close to them because I think they are very above me, almost to belong to another world. “To someone like me, lower than them maybe they wouldn’t answer, they will ignore me” I often tell myself. Consciously I know they are only human, exactly on my level, but my subconscious is betraying me, and I’m afraid to see a disgusted look of rejection on their face, and I think it’s because deep inside I’m afraid that if they reject me, it would mean that I am wrong, different and inadequate. I have to be careful with these thoughts.

  3. On the positive side, I feel an intense, honest and sincere desire for women.
    As I said in previous days, I feel that my will is much firmer, I am much more direct and frank with people, I am not afraid to say “no”. I feel a greater inner strength than in the past, and I believe I am building a mentality that no matter what problem I am faced with, I can do it. My determination in certain things is much increased, sometimes I look back and for certain things I don’t recognize myself, I was a scared , I’m braver now, but with subs the process is damn so natural that you don’t notice for a day to the other to have changed. Fascinating.
    Now I work out frequently (I was lazy in the past and never did), I am on a diet, and I am on a no PMO path.
    Someone around the subliminal club forum said that Ascension aims for extreme self-improvement, I can say that I see the effects.
    I have also become less emotionally responsive to people and do not feel the need for their attention, I am more serious and make fewer jokes to others (which was a consequence of a compulsive search for reaction from others).
    the only thing I have to work on is women.

3 Likes
#259

Sounds like your inner world is strengthening that’s good stuff man. Little by little youll start to feel differently towards these hot women.

If you’re having a hard time getting 7s little by little those 7s will start being attracted to you and you won’t notice it because youre focusing on the 10s.

This recently happened to me just keep taking action when you can and trust the subs youre in the right path. Those issues with women will begin to improve the longer you stay on PS.

2 Likes
#260

Ascension - Day 13
Primal Seduction - Day 1

  1. First wish of the morning as soon as I wake up is: I want women, to understand them, to learn how to seduce them, but this desire is so desperate, I feel desperate and hopeless, I have a concern that beautiful women do not want me.

  2. I feel like I feel a deep sadness in the innermost part of myself.

  3. I feel disgusted and I don’t want to do anything.

  4. All this “beauty” on social media has made people obsess with the exclusive improvement of the aesthetic aspect. It then happens that those who are not beautiful or average compare themselves to these characters on the web, and their self-esteem lowers and they feels like shit. I understand more and more how toxic social media are to the mind. You have to break away from this fake idea of ​​beauty and go back to reality, with your feet on the ground, because what are shown, many times are very high and unrealistic standards that, as I said before, will make you feel only lowly if you give it the chance. And I also fell into this trap.

#261
  1. I understood one thing. Self-pity and telling myself that I can’t do it with women, is a defense mechanism of my subconscious, it’s just an excuse to be able to rest and put aside the responsibility of having to hit on women. It is easier for my subconscious and myself to say that I am not attractive and capable than to face the women I want, because that way I can avoid difficulties and responsibilities, and in its negativity it is heartening that I have no responsibility or duties, so that I can relax, not think about it, but in all this I remain miserable.
    It is a spiral of petty self-sabotage that leads to eternal suffering.
    “DESTROY THIS MENTAL SCHEME!”