Start Of Philosophical Rant…
Right now it’s very hard to describe how strange it feels to be walking out among people, it is like I am in a parallel universe. I thought about it and here’s my take on it.
Before I started subliminals and especially Khan I was way more immature and I was easily swayed by events in society or just in general. I remember when I first started studying status years ago and I went hard on the fake it until you make it… Sure I raised my status but I was still that old immature child on the inside, a wounded goose.
But lately I have become so grounded and not seeking attention like I did before, and my views about the world and society is so different from most people I talk to. I have to add here that I still haven’t had a social life for more a less over the last 2 years which is a factor, but this also makes it ever more weird in a way because everyone I see mostly are strangers. The reaction I get by just looking at people are distant in a way, and maybe that is not so strange when as I mentioned above, I am not in the same synch with most of the ups and downs in this big city.
I believe it’s a matter of relatability…
What do I mean? Before when I was trying to act cool, I could still be relatable in a way because I was still in the same musical tone as the crowd. Now it is like I am playing a much lower tone that is so different from the pitch tone in the crowd. Before I also worried about politics, world events, fear mongering and gas lighting, but now I have a hard time even relating to it.
This is also the case with women, and I realize just how small percent of women out there that actually are interesting to me, and this shows in just how little attraction I get randomly when out… They might be attracted but because of the different energy I put out makes me very unrelatable. It makes sense, because to women feeling safe with a man is the most important thing, and if they cannot relate there’s a split there.
But every now and then I see a woman that meets my gaze and I can tell instantly that she is a confident person. But as mentioned I haven’t been in a social setting with a women that I already know for almost two years now, so that’s going to be interesting to see in the future when it happens. As it is now, when at bars and nightclubs I get less women interested than back when I was a wreck 
But again a wreck is more relateble I guess.
And lastly I have always wanted to go deep and very early, and before I was always told to play games and calibrate. But nowadays I don’t care anymore, if I want to go deep I go deep, and if they are not there yet it is okay and probably not someone that is compatible with me at that time.
This ties into people in general I have been talking to lately that after a while I’m almost too much for them and they subconsciously withdraw from the conversation. But it has to be said that most of these people has been when out at bars and nightclubs, and I’m starting to see a pattern that generally people that go out drink a lot at bars usually are hiding from their problems and not the type of people I want as close friends. Same for women, I find it not attractive when women are too tipsy and drunk because why would you use a stimulant as alcohol to the extreme if you were not running away from your problems?
I Remember This
In the end this is something my first mentor told me, that when you reach a certain level of self-esteem and awareness, most people will not vibe that well with you because of the different energy you are putting out, it’s a subconscious thing.
To me I’m not that sad over it but I find myself wondering why I still keep ploughing in fields where I know my crops cannot grow in? I now know that the percentage of people I want to hang with is lower than before, but I also know that there’s a ton of them out there.
Lastly, I know that I started with subliminals after I quit my last job almost two years ago, and for many months after I have lived semi-isolated from most of society during that time, so I remember being so confused on how different the reactions I got from people were after a while, it came very blunt and fast and it might have been a smoother transition if I would have had a regular job or social hobby during that time of great transformation.
End Of Philosophical Rant…
