I am desperate. Please help me

Questions and Comments
#1

I’ll make a premise. I’ve been listening to Genesis+DRLD+PS at the moment, for 8 days, and I’m having a lot of problems and doubts, for which I wanted to ask you for advice. The problem I want to talk to you about revolves around women, but even more fundamentally, it has to do with my self-esteem and my identity.

With all the insecurities I have and perceive in myself, I begin to believe that I have a serious identity problem, I am not sure of myself or my abilities, and I constantly doubt who I am and what I can have. It gets more complicated when it comes to women and I have a thousand doubts and a thousand fears about myself, I think that no one wants to be with me and I find a thousand excuses why they wouldn’t want to be with me. Every excuse is valid for my fears to distance myself from the girls I want. Now I’m starting to think that the path of seduction is the wrong one (I’m talking about PS in my stack), that first I should build my identity and my self-esteem in order to become confident in myself and love myself, because every time I approach seduction, every time I approach to the romantic context and women, strong fears block my success, making me stop, doubt myself and never act, because I think I’m worth nothing, and no one wants a person who is worth nothing. Or at least that’s what I’m subconsciously convinced of.

What should I do now? I have to think about it carefully. Should I continue this seduction journey with PS? Or aim for a profound care of my identity?

The enormous obstacles I have are to the perception I have of my personal value, which I am convinced is non-existent. This creates enormous insecurities in me and doesn’t allow me to act, and even when I make an effort and do it, the action I do is so small, meaningless and doesn’t give me any satisfaction because it’s far from what I really want.

What do I have to do?

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#2

Going after women when you have self esteem issues is always a bad idea. Remove PS from your stack and replace it with LBFH and leave it in your stack until the end of the year. In January 2024 do a personal assessment and try to go on a few dates with your newly developed self esteem and see if it’s better.
Until then journal your progress.

10 Likes
#3

yes you’re right, alas I understood it more and more with each use of PS and with the subsequent onset of even more problems within me.

Are you recommending LBFH as a tool for self-love and self-esteem or it would also serve to solve other problems too? And you rightly tell me to remove PS, the culprit of this strong recon and problems that are arising.

also thanks for the additional advice and the video, I’ll start watching it now.

Finally, do you think LBFH can do the job alone? I feel like I have deep rooted negative beliefs and fears due to years of negative programming, negative experiences and trauma.

#4

LBFH is designed to find and eradicate your self-love and self-esteem issues and to significantly increase your self-love, self-esteem, self respect and so on. To this date is still the best sub I have used. It won’t solve anything if you only run it for a couple of cycles. Leave it in your stack for as long as you can and also journal.

Genesis and DR:LB is a good combo. PS must have been what was messing things up. Add LBFH and let DR: LB clear limitations and in a few months you’ll have a different perspective on life.

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#5

Okay, thanks for the explanation, I’ll do as you say and stay until the end of the year with the stack you recommended and then make an evaluation.

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#6

@ksub I’ve basically come to realize I’m allergic to self love. It’s a pretty big problem I’ve been trying to tackle in a less direct way but I’m starting to think I just have to face it head on.

Where did you come from in terms of self esteem and what was the most significant impact you noticed on LBFH?

#7

I talk about here. This was mostly before LBFH was released. But even after running subs for 3 years, LBFH still found deeply rooted things to heal: My Sub Club experience on a scale of emotions

1 Like
#8

These are two different things, most old school PUA actually hated themself. I guess you dont have a circle of friends that can help you. Yeah self-love, inner game is great but,

Skills with women, ie. social skills can be learned. I guess you have read a lot about it. I don’t know where you live but if you live in a big city you may look to hire a seduction coach. Someone who will teach you and actually show you how he does things and help you. Check also David Snyder products on seduction.

There is inner game, and there are social skills. Ok one can feed the other, but you can pull women with good social skills, while feeling shit about yourself lol. Saying you NEED to feel good about yourself to have sex with women is false. That’s what men have done for centuries.

TL;DR for your question: find a nice seduction coach in your city that can show you stuff, check David Snyder work on seduction. And in the same time work your inner world with what has been recommended.
You got this.

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#9

Human beings would have been extinted a loooong time ago.

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#10

Run wanted and lbfh for the rest of the year

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#11

Primal heals. I’d do Primal and LBFH. Or primal and (rebirth or Regen)

#12

Would Wanted help me with the problems I have with myself as well as succeeding with women?

Could it happen that with the use of Wanted I run into the same problems I had with PS? What is the difference between the two subs with respect to these problems that have arisen to me?

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#13

I already tried Primal before switching to PS and didn’t get the results I wanted, plus Primal is already included in PS, shouldn’t it have done the job? I know it runs slower, but it’s still in the script, right?

I believe that personally my problem is deeper, and that it mainly concerns my self-esteem and the way I perceive myself, the value I give myself.

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#14

Thanks for suggesting Snyder.

#15

I just thought it’s possible you might be getting recon from the S&S ¯_(ツ)_/¯ and a big part of Primal is healing issues around sexuality.

Didn’t realize you’d already done Primal.

#16

Yes you are right about the S&S part, that’s probably what causes me recon, and sorry I forgot to mention using Primal.

#17

Or you could keep the end goal in mind and run Rebirth with PS until the identity lines up correctly. Taking action through shadow work to change the meaning of the past. This may save time in theory if you are willing to go through a bit of pain.

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#18

Remember recon isn’t bad, it means your finally processing through old shit. Embrace it and stay compassionate my friend.

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#19

Interesting perspective. I might perhaps, before making any stack changes, stick around for a while with this stack to see if the situation evolves, then evaluate whether to change. If as you say, it’s just a passing moment, then it’s worth monitoring it, otherwise I need to change direction.

What do you mean by shadow work, and how should I do it?

#21

The one singular notion that turned everything around for me:
In order to get the girl of your dreams, you must first become the guy of hers.

Focus on self development first… be self sufficient ($$), be healthy (or at least not visibly UNhealthy), become ok with being by yourself… alone does not have to mean lonely. If you require someone else to “be complete”, then that puts you in a position of lack, at best, neediness at worst.

Be interesting, do interesting things…

As for attracting a girl? They will find YOU once you are ready. Best advice I can give for that aspect is… look for a girl you like that is attractive, and not a girl who’s attractive that you like…

eg. look for personality match and compatible interests/goals first, then select for attractiveness.

But if you feel like you don’t deserve these girls, or don’t see why they would want to be with you… work on those things first, and then the girls will find you.

I went from drinking myself into unconsciousness on a regular basis (to process the trainwreck end of an “it’s complicated”) to being happily married to another girl in under 2 years, once I got clear on what had been wrong with my approach before.

My goal was LTR though, not hookups, so adjust as necessary. :slight_smile:

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