Geoff's Journal - Evolution

Journals - Custom Subliminals
#221

I’m still in a semi-serious vibe. The joyful enthusiasm continues to stay under the radar.

This morning/yesterday at work I was really thinking about how much I want to change jobs regardless of the perks here due to the increasing micromanaging and monitoring being implemented.

I wake up tonight before heading into work for OT and I have a missed call/voicemail and email from a job I declined a year ago. The Boss reached out for me to call him for a chat. I can only imagine he’s checking to see if I’m still currently happy in my job and if I’m still interested in his position. I’m guessing finding good machinists was more difficult than he thought.

Point is, this objective from Emperor stood out to me. As I had only been thinking in my mind, never even having this employer enter my mind and an opportunity manifested.

  • Improve and enhance natural positive manifestation abilities, especially when working toward achieving financial abundance, success, and your romance life.

So I’m going to credit the subs for this.

I’ll respond to employer but I doubt he can offer enough to get me to leave. Interesting connection though.

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#222

Sun

Evolution - 2 mins

My mood has been consistently less joyful all last week, the joyful energy never returned after increasing to 2 mins. I’m really not sure what to make of it, am I not done processing or is it an unreliable measure of processing/assimilation?

Exercise has been consistent, I haven’t weighed myself empty up in waking yet but I do seem to have slimmed down maybe 1 to 2lbs, much more to go. Been increasing my zeolite dose too, potent stuff but expensive.

That Employer wrote me back saying they are expanding and growing, wanting me to call this week. I’m unsure how to proceed. There is no way he can or would match let alone beat my current wage. I’m not sure how to respond back to him in a way that I decline yet keep the door open as a option if things go south in the future. I’m actually a little annoyed that I have to ‘deal’ with this but I’m sure it’s not that big of a deal, just requires thought and effort that I don’t want to put in.

Motivation and drive are not as strong this past week. Though I exercise, it’s more a sense of duty than anything else currently. I do miss the enthusiasm I had, I wonder how I get that back. Only 1 more listening day before washout, maybe it’ll bloom again post cycle.

I hope I can maintain momentum, it’s always been a curse in my past, I’d go hard for awhile then burn out. I quit so many things in my past it’s cringe just looking back. I don’t ever want to be that way again.

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#223

Weds - Last Listening Day / End of Cycle 9

Evolution - 3:02

Glm - 3:02 (temporary experiment)

The past week has been quiet. The recon was basically on the Love Bomb side of custom. I found memories of past relationships, scenarios where I felt love and was reconciling my mishaps and mistakes in those situations. I was looking back at myself and my own actions through an outside perspective and seeing how my behavior back then affected others. Making peace with my past I guess.

Last neurofeedback session Monday went good, feeling pretty good. I decided to listen to Glm for some reason, call it an urge or craving. Being the last Listening day, I went for 3 mins, plenty of time to rest on washout.

On a side note, my detox diet has been working. In 13 months I got my testosterone from 525 to 727. Not taking any “testosterone supplements” just diet and detox.

Unfortunately my copper only dropped from 96 to 95 which is not ideal but otherwise things seem to moving forward and I’ll continue with it. The tiredness from high dose zeolite finally broke and I felt really good last night after almost a week of physical fatigue at a level I’m unaccustomed to.

Exercise has remained consistent, even when tired those days, I chose to do something to keep the momentum. I still haven’t replied to the employer who reached out, I need to handle that. It’s been a productive week.

Now for a 10 day washout

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#224

Washout

I had some light brain fog for a few hours, however 8 hours after my loops I started to feel that light, joyful vibe. I’ve been standing even more tall and proud tonight at work. I have noticed a lot more acknowledgement from people here at work than what is typical.

I had a hunch Glm would help Emperor’s expression and I think it is, even if it’s a little. Definitely feeling that motivated enthusiasm starting to peek through. I hope it blooms like this the whole washout :muscle: :slight_smile:

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#225

Man…So my supervisor approaches me saying she needs to work with me specifically for a kaizen efficiency project at a specific machine center…not sure if I should take this as a compliment or what…masculine energy does put off a 'Competency vibe"

Then the safety dork and his minion corner me about my safety glasses because my company now requires gasketed safety glasses. So now I have to get a company voucher and take time of my day to get ducking custom glasses because I require blue light tint or I get headaches from the nasty shop lights all these dumb companies use now.

What passes me off is I just, last night declined the other guys job proposition. I don’t want to comply with this companies dumbass safety rule, it’s such a B.S. things.

Now I’m just not happy…

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#226

Proverbs 14:12

There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, But the end thereof are the ways of death.

  • Relying on ones own personal judgment, a human being chooses the way that seems best. But, when faulty human judgment is the basis for a decision, things often end in disaster.
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#227

I’ve heard zinc and copper compete. Have you looked into how zinc might help?

#228

Yes, you’re spot on Rv. My Zinc was 110 in Sept 2024, this last test it dropped to 87 which is below copper…not ideal. I believe the insufficient zinc level had a lot to do with the poor drop in copper. I’ve since adjusted my zinc consumption and hopefully things move forward for me.

I also take L-Theanine as it supposedly antagonizes and binds to copper as well but apparently if zinc is low, L-Theanine doesn’t work ‘as well’ based on my personal experience thus far.

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#229

Man, Idk if Glm + Emperor is a good thing if you don’t have mastery over self. I woke up just feeling rebellious, defiant and aggressive. This is the first time I’ve felt that ‘I want to quit this job’ vibe that others say Emperor gives one.

I wanted to bark at my supervisor and I also feel an almost extreme sense of contempt for the safety manager, my mind has thoughts like ‘how dare he tell me what I have to do’ its crazy the level of sheer defiance I feel over that encounter. I don’t think the intensity of my state would be this high had I not included Glm in my last listening day.

I need to go deeper and understand why this triggered me so much and how I can utilize these feelings for positive action. It’s good that that I did not act irrationally, shows maturity. I think using Phoenix in the past was a big deal in my emotional maturity.

Inconvenience happens, the world is only getting more oppressive by the day and I can barely handle a safety glasses policy enforcement? I haven’t seen anything yet, so I need to overcome this shortcoming of mine and turn it into a strength.

I have sensed some arrogance and prideful moments with Emperor which immediately raise flags in my mind as that’s not what I want and I don’t blame the sub, rather my expression of it. So I have to temper these and focus more on building a stronger character.

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#230

The internal power I’ve felt all night has been addictive. I feel the way inside how one who watched the movie 300 would feel. Empowered, powerful, resolute, aggressive and energetic. I’m almost concerned, how good I feel…

If this is what concentrated masculine energy is, give me more! Lol, so crazy

I’m vibrating joy, ferocity, assertiveness, dominance, steadfastness and intensity all at once. I’m feeling righteous AF

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#231

Cycle 10

Evolution - 3 mins

I decided 7 days washout was enough and started tonight instead of Sunday. The past day or so I’ve been wanting to listen, looking forward to it. So I am following that vibe.

This washout I felt no bloom. Rather I had many quiet, almost empty days, working out consistently was more of a challenge but I maintained the flow. Mind was going through cringe memories again once in awhile, learning from the past can be unpleasant reliving stuff like that.

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#232

I don’t normally flirt, at all really anymore. I did notice this past week that internally I felt the urge for playfulness. To be a little flirty.

Even this morning at work, this girl who helps out with maintaining our equipment asked me how much longer my machine would be running and I had this sly smile on my face as I said not much longer. I just felt like being a little flirty for no real reason.

Even when I’m just thinking in my head of scenarios, the default seems to have flirty behavior in it. I think some of the Romance scripting in Emperor is starting to activate. Normally I could care less about Even talking to people/girls but even when talking to my female supervisor there is a playful element to me.

Just realized all this looking back trying to analyze stuff. I’m more open to taking little risks socially than I used to be. I’m also less afraid of saying things I normally wouldn’t. Ballsy I guess…nothing major, just an urge pushing me to be more myself than holding back.

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#233

Whatever Romance scripting is in this custom has been helping me be more open, receptive and engaging when the opportunity arises.

However since my loop, I’ve had a lot of memories come flooding back from past relationships, a lot…something is digging deep, could there be relationships related healing reconciliation going on? I get these moments where I feel uncomfortable in specific scenes from my past, they come, hit me and leave. I’m trying to make sense of it all but it really just seems like my mind is saying “here, remember this or that? You were uncomfortable with this or you screwed up that” I always embrace the ‘encounters’ in my own mind with openness and acceptance to maybe help reconciliation.

I guess Emperor or whatever is trying to teach me the way by using my cringy past as teachable moments? I don’t get a lot of time to dwell on the memories, they seem to come and go fairly quickly which I’d say is better than a lingering bad memory. It’s just been a weird week, quiet, introspective with not a lot of energy or drive, nor have I experienced that joyous vibe I’ve mentioned before. Everyday just feels deep. I guess 10 cycles, things start going deeper and this is just a new way of exploring and experiencing growth.

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#234

Is it like there’s a subconscious relationship mentor type just helping you gain discernment and distinctions from past experience so you learn from the “mistakes”?

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#235

Maybe, it doesn’t feel/seem like a skills related intuitive teacher type mentor. Rather I just get bombarded or haunted by these random and specific moments in my past relationships - specifically. I don’t recall having any thoughts that outright teach or guide, it’s just like a “here’s an example or experience of something you didn’t like or that went wrong” and it just kind of sits there until I accept the thought/memory

Not sure if that helps but when I get these memory flashbacks, I do come to the conclusion that I do not want those outcomes to continue in the future or that experience is something I should not want again. So maybe…

Edit: It is more of a felt, emotional experience with an conclusion in my best interest than a mentor but maybe we are thinking the same just using different words.

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#236

Sun

Evolution - 3:30

Since last loop on Thurs last week there’s been an uptick in acknowledgement from others once again. I quite like whatever Aura I put out. It’s a mix of subtle awe and respect that I see when others look at me.

I also have gone 1 month without any releases, I have however looked at pictures randomly but not any videos. The cool thing is I have zero urge to fap, For some reason I just end up looking at the female form but it doesn’t last long and I’m off to do something productive.

Still consistently exercising, I’m pretty happy about this consistency I’m cultivating through Emperor. Weight loss…I’m not sure, the scale is the same or slightly higher but I can tell I’ve built muscle. So I’ve stopped focusing on fat loss and am just prioritizing muscle and working on my structure.

My moods been wildly different, still really quiet and reserved and at times in my own world. Detached quite a bit, drive is subtle not as charged as I was weeks ago. I keep wondering why but continuing to be proactive.

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#237

This is some different kind of recon than I’m used to man. Normally it’s overload symptoms, physical sensations, laziness, coping behaviors…

Tonight feels like a taste of what Khan total breakdown might do, not sure as I’ve never ran it. However my mind keeps showing my past failures, I’m reliving all the embarrassing screw ups, the shameful behaviors, the inappropriate things I’ve done or said. Just mistakes and after mistakes…

I’ve also been wearing my hoodie with the hood up at work for hours just giving off ‘don’t bother me’ vibes instead of my usual openness. None of this feels familiar, I’m quite disengaged with the present and being at work feels robotic while my mind replays all my failures and shortcomings. I wonder why, what’s next…it’s been probably a week of this but it’s steadily becoming more intense with some memories.

What’s the message, what is the point of this experience…am I re-organizing my beliefs, perceptions and sense of self? It’s all just weird…it feels weird and uncomfortable…as it should I guess.

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#238

It’s funny how once it was midnight last night my mood seemed to suddenly lift. After I realized it became April today then it made sense. Now that I’m in my best 4 month/energy, I should do much better.

Energy increased too, had to check myself driving home as I got a little too impatient.

Supervisor told me I had to start washing out my machines at work, instead of owning it I gave an excuse to why I hadn’t before. I also felt defensive about the whole thing. I acted in an immature way and felt my Ego was overly involved. I swear I’m usually a pretty accepting and humble gut but Emperor just gets me a little arrogant, maybe it’s the Rogue module too…I honestly don’t like when my ego does shit like that. I’m not blaming the sub, it’s me whose expressing this behavior. They say 9 energy in numerology has big egos so I need to tone it down because there’s really nothing about me that justifies acting like that.

I’ve learned that I really don’t like being told anything. I get revved up way too high over it, sonething I need to work on. Being reactive like that is feminine behavior not masculine. Maybe I should add Glm again next listening day. Balance is important.

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#239

I’ve been moody and aggressive internally for days. I’ve been feeling more stress too, jaw clenching, lip biting, sleeping less and overall I have much less patience. At work I am increasingly bored and becoming resentful as if I’m better than this. I haven’t worked out in 3 days, still a little sore but usually I just focus on legs until upper is recovered but I’m just not.

I’ve been driving with impatience and aggression too which is starting to bother me because I’m just asking for problems. My perception of my job is becoming overly negative. My ego has been acting up as I wrote about previously. I’m not sure where all this is coming from.

Been thinking it’s recon but I also realized I ran out of L-Theanine last week and maybe I was just unaware of how well it chilled me out. Luckily today I’ll have some delivered.

My mindset seems to be on the ‘I’m sick of this shit’ vibe. I’ve been doing good controlling myself and not saying stupid stuff. I have a pretty limited life with my job and where I live, I’m wondering just how well Emperor works for me with nse with such a limited lifestyle. A lot of times I ignore subs simply because I don’t think I do enough/live enough to get any real value out of them. Maybe that’s why I’ve been buggin…Emperor is alluding to me that my life is lame.

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#240

Weds

Evolution - 4 mins

Glm - 4 mins

Been feeling defensive and guarded. Lacking gratitude despite being focused on it. Gratitude and patience while tempering this inner chaotic aggressiveness is the goal this week. Stop speeding and driving recklessly, stop acting like I’m above shit. Moving towards balance and away from egotistical immaturity.

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