What does New Beginnings do? It has no description.
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How strange. Where did it go?
It is a healing module that is supposed to find your deepest things that need to be healed, and also heal imposter syndrome (feeling like youāre not good enough, as though you are a phony, even if you are highly competent).
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I have Atman and Unlimiter. Both removes limits. Do have any experience with either? Is it unnecessary to have both?
Unlimiter seems like itād pair with limitless or an intelligence/productivity theme more so than healing but Iām not sure, so I added it.
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Stage 3 Insight: Contā¦
Since 1 loop of stage 3, I noticed my conversation with a female friend of mine change. On my side, I had less sympathy and wanted to be straight up with all of my replies. Iām always honest but tactful, tonight I was getting fed up with what I saw as her repetitive plight and why things arenāt the way she wants.
I felt deeply. I wanted less connection. The bonding over struggle the past few months was waining. I felt more indignant tonight than I ever have.
That feeling of internal strength is slowly appearing, after 1 loop. I am pretty excited. That āget a gripā energy is what Iām feeling. Man, if this is what stage 3 is about, bring it onā¦exactly what Iām wanting.
Edit: I also planned on ordering tacos tonight, however as I pulled up the app, the overwhelming urge NOT to, caused me to close the app and move on. Things are looking up 
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I realize you are probably wanting to be efficient with your build. Here is what I would encourage you to ask yourself ādo you want the effects of Atman and Unlimiterā?
Unlimiter is about overcoming limits. Limitless is about boosting your intelligence.
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Awesome, where did you find the description? Thanks bro!
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2nd draft
Core:
- DR Stage 4
Modules:
- Achilles heel
- Ares
- Atman
- Aphrodite
- DEUS
- Discordia Deliverance
- Divine Self-Image
- Emotions Unfettered
- FEBRUUS
- Foundation
- Growth Through Pain
- I AM
- Lineage
- Mosaic
- New Beginnings
- Omnidimensional
- Potentiator
- Unlimiter
Added Foundation from RVs recommendation. To help stabilize/ground me when Iām full on in my head, processing.
Lineage, to heal childhood issues with my mom. I wonder if this address attachment issues, Iām disorganized attachment due to relying on one parent who was both critical and cold, yet provided me with safety/support. Never knowing what Iād get each day.
New Beginnings, another strong breakdown/purifier.
Aphrodite, to heal sexual issues I know I have, inability to accept forms of pleasure, shame and repression too.
I figure if I can just tear myself wide open and address everything, Iāll finally be free of this trash, then I can move onto pure masculine development.
Not sure I like 19 modules, the more I have the longer it takes. I donāt know why Divine Self-Image seems unnecessary in this custom but I keep feeling like I should pull it, but maybe itāll help offset the amount of discomfort Iām bound to experience.
Saw the differentiation between atman and unlimiter and yes, both would do well in this custom. Everything seems quite synergistic so Iāll keep debating and clarifying my goal. But so far this is it.
Aphrodite, might be better suited for use with Wanted down the roadā¦
I wonder if DEUS would make this custom to intense, especially with Omnidimensional or would it work better?
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It was there when I checked the Q Store. Do try a different browser and see.
DR Stage 3, cycle 1
Listening, day 3
Passed out before Listening this morning, been feeling profound tiredness at end of my shifts. I attribute this to my paragon custom.
Listened to my loops tonight. Twice a week is going well. I can feel some sensations in my head now. No overwhelm, smooth so far. Every other day and 3 days a week is just more than necessary for me. Starting to find my groove.
ā¦
Things have improved in the attraction arena. Iāve noticed Iām giving off a strength vibe. People seem drawn to it, to me. Iām being sought out more.
Was offered a video chat whenever I wish (naughty kind) this week.
Was called today to make arrangements for final measurements for my new shower remodel, the guy called me back not 5 mins later with an even better time for me.
Boss texted about Saturday OT, only to reach out to me and offer Saturday AND Sunday, and when I asked if they were 8 hour shifts, he said I could work 10 hour shifts if Iād like.
A first shift Welder whose been staying late, started interacting with me and being open, sharing stories and weāve established a nice rapport. Talking about kids, child support struggles, values and society. I was shocked at how smooth the whole thing manifested. I must have a newly developed presence. Being a male to male relational dynamic, Iām usually not used to that. But the increase in masculinity from DR coupled with the loving openness of LBH truly shined in this regard.
Iām not closed off like I used to be. I feel more willingness to engage with others, to communicate. This is some nice progress. My whole demeanor is evolving out of pain and aversion, into something more positive.
Stage 3 while still early, is really nice. It feels like development, like organization of what the past 2 stages broke into.
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Actually I didnāt see it either. So thank you for posting that.
DR Stage 3, cycle 1
Rest, day 6
The past day Iāve been dealing with a lot of thoughts of inadequacy. Lots of inner spotlight-like focus. Been looking at myself, namely drive ā> behavior ā action.
Why I do what I do, the mechanisms behind it. Feeling a little down about it all but thatās to be expected when you start looking at yourself.
I was also told a somewhat harsh statement, which wasnāt meant to be hurtful. It was just a flat out personal opinion when I brought up a topic. But man, did it hit me deeply. It exposed the pain of past rejection and the intensity of such a profound sensivity within me.
I was defensive and said my peace(which normally I wouldnāt have done, which is good) but I feel it would have been better not to react now in hindsight. I pretty much showed the other party how much it affected me and exposed insecurity, which makes me look weak. I am weak right now but the world doesnāt need to know it.
I will be more vigilant next time. But understanding this yet still reacting in the heightened emotional moment is concerning. It does however reinforce my module choice of Emotions Unfettered in my future custom. As I definitely could use more work on this aspect of emotional regulation at all times.
All in all, Iām learning a lot and the recon is quite low/manageable.
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Trust that the underlying pattern is shifting.
May take a while, but it is.
Keep going. Keep processing.
Thereās a difference between Fear and Weakness.
Itās subtle; but Fear is about the perception of Weakness. Whereas Weakness is more about actual, objective capacity; whether itās perceived or not.
Fear has a tendency to over-perceive Weakness. Itās trying to protect us from damage. So itās actually very reasonable that it tells stories about what we Canāt Handle and about our Inability to Cope.
But Fear is often about those stories, perceptions, and evaluations, more than it is about what we are actually able to do.
I say these things because Iām suspecting that youāre dealing more with stories, expectations, and evaluations of incapacity than with actual incapacity.
Itās the difference between a Narrative About Experience and an actual experience.
āāāāāā-
A famous weight-lifter wakes up one morning feeling weak. His body feels like someone siphoned off all of the inner gasoline over night.
Imagining going to the gym he says to himself, āthereās no way I can go into the gym like this! What will people say if I canāt even bench 250 lbs.?ā
He starts to replay memories of when he was a small, insecure 15 year old. Canāt let anyone see that!
He plans to stay at home until the feeling changes. Weeks? Months? Who knows.
āāāāāāā
But thenā¦
He remembers that he has a simple weight set in his basement.
He goes downstairs to test his actual strength levels (using a safe weight amount for individual workout).
He discovers that, despite the feeling of frailty, heās actually able to lift as much as he normally can.
Something is clearly going on with his perceived strength. Maybe heās got a sub-threshold cold, maybe itās hormonal, maybe heās subconsciously processing some challenging emotions.
Whatever it is, it turns out, heās still strong.
He ends up continuing to go to the gym for his scheduled workouts. At the same time, he determines to support himself as he explores what these perceptions and sensations are actually about.
What he doesnāt do is allow a perception of his strength to cancel out actual objective evidence of his capacity.
āIāll treat the sensation as a sensation. I wonāt ignore it or deny it.ā
āIāll treat my actual ability as my actual ability. Whether I am perceiving it accurately or not, itās still real.ā
And once this process has run its course, I hope that my sensations and my actual reality will be even better integrated than they were before.
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(post-note)
The appropriate response for the weightlifter in that metaphor was not to repress his sensations; it was not to adopt an attitude of forced bravado or to curse and forcefully change his āweakā mindset.
It was to find a reasonably safe context for objectively checking and testing his actual current capacity.
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This is such a deep response that I have to read this many times. I donāt even know what to say yet 
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I think youāre spot on Malkuth. My minds heavier tonight and reading this more than once, it is starting to click.
I do notice the ānarrativeā in my mind is driven by fear. I can, at the very least see it now. Itās always been there and Iām looking forward to this state shift away from fear. Itās been running my life way too long.
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I try to apply this principle also.
No need to respond quickly. 
Itās actually probably more beneficial not to.
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Youāre telling me, brother. Same here.
Remember that the fear is your friend. Itās just a very damned over-protective friend who has annoyingly poor boundaries sometimes. 
To negotiate and collaborate with it, we have to use one of the languages that it understands.
Use the language of Experiencing to communicate with Fear.
Fear: āWe canāt surf!! We canāt swim! We canāt even handle water! Itāll kill us!ā
You: (quietly goes and sits down near a peaceful pond. takes off one shoe and puts foot in the water.)
Fear: āOkay, maybe water wonāt kill us. But swimming is impossible.ā
You: (wades into the knee-height water and enjoys the feel of the water around your legs) āHow about we start from here and discover how difficult it actually is?ā
Fear: āThis doesnāt feel too bad. Do you promise to get out if things get too intense? There was an article that said once every decade, spontaneous ocean waves and sharks can mysteriously appear in ponds!ā
You: (starting to gently swim) āYes, if things get too crazy, weāll get out for a while and find a better way.ā
Fear: āThis feels pretty good! Okay, while you do this, Iāll keep a look out for rare pond sharks! Ohā¦and also, fix your kicking form before you get a leg cramp.ā
You: āGot it. Thanks for that.ā
Fear does have useful contributions to make. But we need to use actual experiences to help it to not run amok or get too out of control.
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DR Stage 3, cycle 1
Listening, day 7
Paragon Custom - I decided, for the first time ever, to listen to 7 minutes.
I just felt intuitively guided towards less. Iāve been on this less is more kick. First I drop my main two titles(still 15 mins) from 3 days a week schedule to two and now cutting my customs listening time. Ha!
Never thought Iād be where Iām at now when I first started. I was always so rigid, hereās proof Iām evolving 
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Custom Thoughts
I find it really interesting that I slept a solid 10 hours yet woke up tired, unmotivated and seemingly depressed. The tiredness dissipates but the mood is still here.
It also feels like listening to 7 minutes of the Paragon custom is more intense than at 15 minutes. I can feel sensations in my head, definite processing. It is no less than it was at 15.
The part I canāt understand right now is the drop in mood. What happened in 12 hours that changed my disposition. Did listening to a physical shifting sub somehow kick up the other subs recon?
Weird how one thing can effect another when they seem unrelated.
ā¦
Some observations of this custom.
I definitely notice Harmonic Singularity, Iāve become less tense and more physically relaxed since using this custom.
Sps: Legs, not 100% whatās happening but I feel more grounded in my legs, increased strength/easier time working legs. My stance seems different as well. Iām just more cognizant of my legs than Iāve ever really been.
Sps: Digestive System, abdominal bloat is less, regardless of food choices. Digestion is quicker. Some foods still take awhile but Iāve noticed an improved rate of time. Also regularity seems better.
Asclepius, a few guys at work have been visibly sick and yet come around me often. I have not succumbed to any illness. Something is keeping me strong.
Serum X, when I work out and get sore, the pain and fatigue dissipates within 28 hours max, mostly 1 day. I used to be sore for 3 to 4 days in the past.
Paragon Sleep Core, The DEPTH of my sleep has improved dramatically. I woke up knowing I was in a deeper sleep than the past. I also feel more refreshed after sleep. Iāve had one or two occasions where I know I was dreaming or thinking heavily as I woke up. No recall but Iām getting closer.
Sps: Endocrine System, I donāt know for sure but the past 2 weeks Iāve had increased arousal, need for sexual release. Iāve been critical with myself for being weak with PMO but tonight I realized that maybe my testosterone and hormone levels are being optimized and this increased Libido is just something I have yet to regulate. Things do seem to be optimized from a whole body standpoint. I think the masculinity of DR + this is causing changes I havenāt dealt with, thinking itās a weakness when itās just seemingly unguided improvement.
ā¦
Can 7 minutes be more intense than 15?
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