Then you have your answer. Stick with Genesis.
Im not sure i dont want to run away from a sub, just beacuse it gave me some hard time, but i still think khan black needs a upgrade. You want to use it because you think it’ll help you to control yourself but it makes it worse through recons
Its getting an upgrade this season.
I hope it happens soon
I havent picked my 3rd sub, yet. Also im consedering maybe i can run RoM i want to delve deep into myself and improve my relationship with myself, also i want to develop my masculinity i can run glm too but i have only one place and when i look to the my subliminal library i gotta say that i bought unnecessary subliminals, RoS intrigues me but i dont have money to buy, I wish I’d bought RoS instead of these unnecessary subliminals
Probably my stack will be GLM, LotS and RoM.
I don’t feel my self like a man and also physically I look younger than my actual age.
But I have to say I don’t feel my attractive while running LotS, rn I’m at home at university I was receiving compliments from people. Also when I used LotS before I didn’t myself attractive too.
I don’t know what to do really
What exactly are you running LOTS for? If its to get in shape then stay with it. That’s a long term investment that will pay off with a more attractive body
attractiveness and mucles for sure,
Im going gym for like 2.5 years and phsique is not where i want it to be, i wanna jacked and shredded body
Iam confused in many ways and in summer i have no direction, no excitement in this phase of life. I dont feel good to be honest. Should i feel good? Its kinda i dont seek this often anymore not because of wisdom etc but hoplessnes, learned helplessness.
Im numbing my brain movies, social media and sometimes with book. And unfortunately with pmo.
I dont look into myself.
In summer people, travel, go somewher else , have fun but for me there is no such things.
In where i live people go to mountains because of hot weather. In a few days i have to go and im fucking hate it, the place is like deprived area, like there is no phone internet conncetion.
I dont like life, i dont like my life yeah there are always people who has worse, but i feel like im always under my potential what im doing right now im just at home. At least i went to uni this year also my gpa was good but im 23 i should’ve gone to uni,earlier. I delayed for 3 years my family sent me to primary school 1 year late. It makes fuckıng 4 years. And you know i feel myself tired and it is a tiredness which never goes like it’s running on background. Like not my body but my soul is tired. And i delayed uni for 3 years but for what? I can go to this uni in my first year even though i didnt study to exam properly.
Sometimes i say myself maybe this is what meant to be, maybe this is the best for me, but if i have to say whats going on my mind, im not sure. I cant believe this divine order, higher self shit, i think sometimes people just fucked up. I dont have fire or curiosity inside me toward which i had before when i was kid or teenager even it was little. Its just like im watching life from roadside.
And today on yt i saw a video from a girl i follow. She posts about her life self-improv etc. She is very beatiful like barbie, If I want to be with someone, it would definitely be someon like her. And she doesnt like a empty person nor a bimbo. But im feeling kinda bad when i watch her videos becuase i remember, long ago i was dreaming about her. And also it seems that she has a wealthy good family. She is like out of reach, i would like someone like her but how could i ever be with someone like her? a person who is extremly beatiful, who looks clever and has self awareness, kind… With a good family. She will have standarts too. But the thing that got me confused was the bf of this yt girl. He was not fit and has receind hairline, the girl is 11/10 like goddess and the guy pyhsically like 5/10 it doest match, That reminds me of a scene from house md. And i dont think the guy is super super rich he is dentist and looks like nice guy. First i thought probably she had a good looking, rich guy from her class etc nıt this did catch me a bit off guard, interesting. -Actually i dont like to write about this topic and im trying to write this for 2-3 days, im just lazy.- first i thought maybe she had fun with ‘bad boys’ and then found this guy, but i think its kinda gross think like this even if this is the case why it bothers me, but this guys dont make sense as a couple. and before she had pic with this where she had a ring ehich this guy gave probably they engaged it was looking like that, but she removed this pics and in videos there’s no ring but still they followüng each other and guy post emojis under her post, probably they are still together but i didnt understnad this. and why the fuck im analyzing them, why?.
because rn i dont have much thing to do but this girl makes me feel no good, ı got obsessive, when i first saw her i dreamt about her a lot, i thought her as my gf it was lile 2-3 years ago, i thought like she is flawless,i would want someone like her. i dont know mate, it is very stupid write so long about this topic and it doesnt feel good to think about others and their lifes. and one thing more also she says she is professional life coach etc so she is into like self improv things but i dont understand why she pics her photos on ig, they are not lust traps, lustful photos but still she post herself and for me these seem like for validation. snyway fucking there are other things too… but i hope she’ll be happy actually, if it were up to me, I would have wanted her to always be happy—even in the past—but you have to go through some pain to grow. Still, there’s pain, and then there’s pain… anyway
Im readin rn King, Warrior, Magician and Lover.
To be honest, I’m starting to get bored with the book.
Actually ı took a look at Jean Baudrillard’s Simulacres et Simulation, it caught my interest but book looks kinda hard to read but i will try to read but internet connection will be problem later and i think i will need some internet to really understand this book.
Also im thinking doing master at abroad, i need to improve myself, i need to improve my english. i dont want feel like a empty person. and i should cut off or reduce pmo. i should tap in myself. i should be top in every area of my life. at least for now i want to develop myself intellectually and physically. but when we go to mountains i wont have access for gym, i bought a pull up bar and a resistance band but the resistance band was lighter than I expected, and they’re almost the same price as a pull-up bar—I don’t understand how these bands can be so pricey—but anyway, I’ll just have to make do with these now. it’s better than nothing.
and i think one of the primary reason why i dont see the improvments i want in gym because of the diet. i dont like to eat too much. and i dont force myslef i need some discipline and planning about this. and the other problem is frequency most of the time i go for 2 times a week i should make it 3 times
I might try Ros.
Probably my stack will.be RoS, RoM and LotS.
And nowadays Im struggling to control my sexual urges and I remember Spartan helped me in this area a little. Maybe I can switch with LotS later but I want to give some time for LotS.