But still maybe i would drop rich instead of paragon because rn wealth generation is not my main issue
And why I’m always struggling when it will be end? When I feel myself good, powerful when I will be wealthy or I will take solid actions for it, when I will have loving partner.
I feel better but still these are the problems. And I’m alone.
Yeah it hits heavy now, I guess, I don’t know why but I feel so confused now a days like something squeezes my heart, I’m in stress I have closing exams I have to study but also my mind filled with the girl. I started get obsessed with her, thinking her don’t make me feel good. And I think this situation conflicts with very core of WB. Yeah maybe the title itself tries to show something but it hurts I’m talking about this topic gemini but I think most of the time it makes it worse.
Actually I don’t want to drop this title. Last Friday I listened for 2 min and after that she approached me said good morning but also I ran yesterday nothing happened but recon.
But I feel desperate and helpless only think can help is working hard rn but it’s not right, I should train my prefontal cortex more because my amygdale goes crazy now
Well it’s noon now I saw her in the morning she we were entering the classroom made eye contact said hello she said hello too. And later i asked something about lessons said goodbye to her when I leave. I felt good I should talk to her often.
But now I’m alone again I had some accidents in library I should study and I if I can manage to study effectively I might go to gym today.
I really want to know this girl. Thinking about her just makes it bad everything because you idealise her. And my starts to think that we are partner while we are not.
Maybe she will reject me idk. Also I don’t know how can I proceed things more because I haven’t had any gf etc. and I don’t know what would I do when I get her but I don’t want to think too much anymore I hope I can do that because when I think I get pessimistic and I fight with ghosts illusions it’s fucking trap.
I can’t study like this
Painful, I’m wasting my time I’ll ask her coffer or something like that after exams(but there is 2-3 weeks for this,) or I’ll tell I like her but if I get bad grades at exam idk if I would have that confidence. And she is hardworking too I don’t want to look like stupid.
Thinking her makes it everything bad.
Why don’t you just ask her to help you study? It’s perfectly reasonable thing to ask a classmate.
I asked her some topic but i think i cant want this from her becuase everyone has a work, she needs to study too. And wanting this from her would be too much at this point and also i dont see her at the library where i study, probably she goes her home idk.
And mostly she is with her friends, but if some oppurtinites occurs i might ask but i cant ask her to help me like a child.
But if she was alone i would ask but if i ask her lets stuyd together when she were with her friends that would be awkard
Recon hits heavy, after talking to friend I felt better
I should erase my idelazitaions around her or around any girl. And also i should use my time properly like also i need to socialize but not of course exam time. But fuck it
i need to fight, I don’t want to do anything but also I don’t want to give up. Also I don’t use my time efficiently, at library I waste my time.
I don’t know should I stop running subliminals rn I don’t feel good but idk if it’s because recon or exam stress or fuckin both
ill stop running subliminals for a while rn i think it makes it everything worse because of recon.
I need clear mind. Running WB might be hard maybe but after exams I will continue to use it.
Probably i will suck at exams i am so fucking stupid
Im not running any subliminals rn and i feel better also the exam was good but also i have another exam tomarrow. But todays exam was the most problematic one for me it was good
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Sounds like progress!
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Wb was giving me hell outta recon
And now?
Im not using now and im better i feel lighter and im not gonna use anything until the exams are done.
Also in the morning i have had very unfortunate accident and later i had very lucky momment, the two events neutralized each other. It was kinda odd but i dont know why i had such a momment but genertally it was good
After exams im thinking running wb and either summertime or inner circle.
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How are the microloops helping compared to not using microloops?