Foundation of Freedom (AM for 180 Days)

Journals - Major Programs
#74

Day 53/180
I had two very distinct dreams one was me meeting two of my favorite YouTubers Daniel Greene and Merphy Napier and we like mapped out my path to success although I don’t remember what the path was, but it included writing a novel???

The other dream was me standing up to my mother when she treated me like shit in the dream. It was hard and I felt like an asshole.

I have been battling some serious self doubt that keeps haunting me. I need to find a way to surrender to the self doubt but not give in to it.

Pretty lazy night tonight. I played a Greek god game which gave me some inspiration for my business and I was just having a relaxing good time with it. I have some guilt for pretty much only doing that. I am working on being okay with myself just as I am. I am working to surrender to the unseen force that is in my life. I can feel it, but that’s about it.

I also finished book 6 on Wheel of Time. Slow start, but solid ending. Enjoying the prologue of book 7.

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#75

How is your energy level?

#77

I’m wondering if this might be some reconciliation.

Can you make it 9?

I’m concerned about the amount of Ultima you are listening to. I find too much Ultima can lead to me feeling exhausted.

#78

I am pretty sure that I am at my normal energy levels. I have been sleeping pretty hard the last two nights at around 7 to 8 hours.

I have a lot of anger from work that might be inflating the energy. My frustration with work and business is starting to become more clear. A lot of self doubt and helplessness is contributing to that.

#79

It probably is some reconciliation. I keep having dreams of standing up for myself.

I have been listening exactly as the new listening pattern suggests so I am not sure how I could be listening to too much Ultima when the guidelines suggest it. Plus on the weekends I usually don’t listen to subs. Sometimes I do, but that’s once or twice a month.

#80

Because some people can listen to less as per the guidelines and get results.

Because some people are more sensitive to the Ultimas.

Because the guidelines are a place to start and adjust from there.

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#81

I can adjust to every other day for the Ultima as a start. Would you suggest running it on day of AM or the other days when I am off of it?

#82

Here’s what I would encourage you to experiment with.

Rest days as rest days. NOTHING on rest days. No Ultimas.

Try that.

Thank you for being open to listening to less. We want you to success with as little stress as possible.

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#83

Day 54/180

I had a dream where I stood up to my father who was being an asshole. This turned into a major fight with tears and a loss of voice.

At work I am noticing a lot of inner rage and am becoming less tolerant to bullshit. I still attempt to be tactful but only to a point.

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#84

Just a suggestion, try not running a booster and/or running AM every 3rd day or even less, and see how it effects your focus.

As I read your journal, it sounds like your further and further grappling with what you perceive as in the way of your success and quality of life experience and singling in on resolving that.

In my theory and experience this kind of focusing in-is very much reconciling, because the sub is focusing you on it to resolve it to move forward or realize you don’t need to resolve it to move forward–

just some 2 cents for what it’s worth

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#86

Just so I am clear you think I should do a schedule like below?

Day 1 subliminal
Day 2 rest
Day 3 rest
Day 4 subliminal
Repeat

#87

Yes, I’d give that a shot for one week/10 days and see what happens.

#88

Day 55/180 rest day

I feel a very intense almost burning sensation in my chest area and when I truly feel it a swarm of confusing emotions enter my brain.

My anger from yesterday has dissipated pretty well from yesterday.

Did not work on the business at all.

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#89

If this intense anger continues over the next few days, please submit a support ticket about it.

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#90

The anger has subsidied.

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#91

Day 58/180
I just feel so lost and lonely despite having a fantastic and loving relationship with my wife and great friendships. I have been quite melancholy the last few days. This seems to be on a cycle and happens at least once a quarter. I go feeling great take action, drop in enthusiasm, just survive, self loathe a bit then do it again. This happened even before subclub.

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#92

Day 59/180

I notice a rising anger and irritation when I am doing things I do not want to do like chores and any activity I get dragged to. However there is a part of me that sees this as the “ego’s” anger and not my own.

I was talking to my wife about the differences I felt between Stark and AM. In Stark I felt amazing about life. It was one big party, but I neglected the details and working on my business. However on AM I notice more action towards my business and things that need to get done but I am much grumpier.

She told me that she noticed I have become much more responsible and I do things with less complaining. She also noticed that I am nice when helping her out because of her ankle being hurt.

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#93

Which subliminal are you currently running?

#94

Ascension Mogul with a booster Ultima.

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#95

Day 60/180
Trying a new style of meditations. I am working on my inner peace and effortlessness instead of meditations directed towards something. I will lean on the subs for direction and focus on inner peace.

I have come to the realization that all the pain I was experiencing the last 2 weeks was a blessing in disguise. I am being forced to look inward behind my thoughts and experiences to discover the real me, the divine spark within to begin examining my thoughts and feelings from a different lense. Even though I feel I haven’t been taking enough action towards my business, I am taking action whether I like it or not to reform myself from within. The pain is what got me to take this road of looking in not out. It got so much that I could not ignore it anymore. That is what I call the spark of transformation.

I really really wanted to switch subliminals, I am glad that I did not.

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