Why am I still so open to others and the world?
I remember being so open at high school that I thought hanging round anyone who would pay attention was my friend. They would insult me in their own languages and I would sit there and take it. Basically showing them how little self worth I had.
Then trying to get others to like me at university. No one wanted to know me or be near me. Dancing in a group on a Saturday night the room would clear where I was.
Then being the sitting duck at work where the hospital physicians would conspire to get me fired, just for not being their little yes man and slave (they looked down on admin).
Then having a woman friend walk off after 7 years with no explanation.
Of course family also don’t care.
"Give love to get love"
What a joke.
No one cares, however much you offer yourself up to others. Not everyone is your friend.
Being so open that I forgot who I was. Isn’t reality a bitch?