Ecstasy of Gold - Now or Never

I believe it. From reading Khan journals it seems that the people that went through all stages are now reaping huge benefits.

This makes perfect sense. It was the most difficult, trying times in my life that lead to huge shifts in the past.

Btw @AMASH this might be creepy but I went back to your iron throne journal and then back through your khan journey. There is a definite change and progression in your writing.

Keep on truckin

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You know I just realized. A friend that used to contact me a lot if I neglected to keep in touch has been remarkably quiet of late. I was starting to wonder what changed. Now I realize it might just be ST2. Interesting.

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@DarkPhilosopher I was kind of freaked out. But then I remembered ST1 early stages.

What prompted me, I had life long friends really good visit my town for 4 nights. They only scheduled one dinner with me when normally they would stay with me the whole time. They told me they were staying with some new husband and wife that my buddyā€™s wife now works with. At first I was a little hurt but then realized one of the days they didnā€™t stay with me I had such a good business day and made very good money.

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Not creepy at all, thank you.

Yes, with Khan, I am truly a better man. More grounded. More masculine. I really enjoy the benefits and donā€™t plan to stop Khan anytime soon.

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ST2 day 15 starting

Good lord this is rough. I hung out with friends Saturday night. I had a good time but I really donā€™t feel like doing anything at all.

Have been skipping the gym, slacking on any work that isnā€™t absolutely necessary, and could seriously lay around all day if I didnā€™t force myself to get up and do something. Even just a walk outside.

I will say that a lot of the time spent laying around Iā€™ve been in a like a melancholy contemplation over ā€œwhat is my true path?ā€ ā€œWhat are my innate skills/talents and how can I use those to make money?ā€ And ā€œhow can I provide a ton of value to as many people as possible?ā€

No answers yet lol.

But I just keep plowing through, I seriously think I understand what true depression feels like ha.

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Stages 2, of Khan and I am sure of EoG, are probably the hardest things Iā€™ve ever run.

But also some of the most beneficial stuff once you get to a breakthrough!

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Thank you @AMASH , I appreciate the encouragement.

Yeah 2 more weeks max and I should be through the roughest of it. I just keep reminding myself of how I felt that last week of ST1 after breaking through the difficult part.

Khan was my plan after I feel Iā€™ve given my run of EoG all I can, but now I donā€™t know. I might hold off on that for a while. Not sure I can afford another 2 weeks of of each ST1 and ST2 being out of commission and healing.

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For me, ST2 didnā€™t start feeling good until day 30 :smile:

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Yikes. Ok 16 more days :sweat_smile:

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EoG ST2 day 16

Well this is very interesting. I decided to just stop fighting it and Monday and Tuesday did absolutely nothing. Laid around, slept in, napped if I felt like it, read a little, watched some youtube. Went for a couple walks, didnā€™t feel guilty about not working out. ST2 ultrasonic playing this whole time and masked with headphones during walks.

During this down time I basically questioned my whole business model. My entire view on wealth and how money works. And I think Iā€™m going to take my business in a very different yet still related, so I donā€™t have to start from scratch, kind of way.

The driving contradiction that I have been fighting with for a long time now, and that came to light in these past two days is this: I always had lofty goals of shooting for a million dollars a year. Picturing the nice penthouse, the 5 star traveling. But I realized, wealth, like women, needs to be a ladder like progression. For me the shoot for the moon is kind of bullshit. So I lowered my goals and decided if I can do $100k in a year, I would be totally happy beyond my wildest dreams. Get there, then shoot for $250k a year. Nobody can go from not being able to talk to a girl, to taking one home that night. Same for money, nobody (or at least 99.9%) of people donā€™t go from getting by to millionaire in a short time.

This really feels a lot like a break up from my entire business plan, but also very freeing. I was dead set on hustling and grinding until my business made it huge. Now though, I feel a relaxed excited energy of letā€™s just slightly stretch the comfort zone, or ceiling, of money set point, then once you get there, push it a little bit moreā€¦

It feels like Iā€™m abandoning something I was so sure of, yet now so sure that a change in coordinates is absolutely the right thing to do for me at this point in life.

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How are you doing @HappyHero?

Iā€™m curious about your progress at such a crucial moment in your development.

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Hi @AMASH , thank you so much for asking.

Still pretty rough reconciliation. Just toughing it out thanks to yourself and others paving the way and staying strong with Khan.

Itā€™s really been a combined lack of motivation with constant contemplation and questioning of what path regarding business is the best to take for myself. It has caused a lot of upheaval in my work tbh.

This weekend I was with family and it was one of the strangest experiences Iā€™ve had. It took me back to my younger days of being painfully shy, but in a different way. I was so in my head thinking about which direction I need to take my business going forward, that I was basically a complete social retard this weekend. My family was asking if I was ok. I just could not get out of my head and stop obsessing over my life going forward with regards to wealth that I couldnā€™t get into a social/normal fun mood at all. It was like I was physically there, but not present at all.

Anyway, I think I will add a few days on to ST2 as I only could listen at night time when I was alone. So maybe 8 hours per day the last 3 days. Technically Iā€™m at day 21 and approximately over the 300 hours mark going by 15 hours per day. But not sure Iā€™m there with a handful of days I got a lot less sub time in.

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Hi,
thank you for sharing.
Do you want to take some days off and be for yourself?
Maybe this can help.

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Honestly, ST2 only gave me a breakthrough on the very last day, day 30.

So I say: stay strong and continue, just 9 days left before deliverance, I hope.

ST2 is the toughest reconciliation type subliminal I have ever experienced. But I also believe thanks to staying on it, I can handle ST4 smoothly while many couldnā€™t.

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Yep, itā€™s your ST2 journal that is helping me stick with it. And that last week of ST1 was quite amazing. As if my subconscious just finally submitted and accepted the constant subliminal suggestions.

Iā€™m staying strong and canā€™t wait for ST3 and hopefully some increased motivation and action.

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Day 24 of ST2

Reconciliation is still rough. A lot of strategizing with little action has occurredā€¦to where I know exactly what I need to do and feel right on the brink of breaking through and doing it, but still unable. Something that brute force and sheer willpower has proven to be useless, lacking, and even counterproductive against.

I can confidently say this is the worst, most unmotivated, inactive, unproductive, and melancholic/apathetic period of my life. Ever.

I seriously have no motivation to do anything - working out, work, eating healthy, reading. It takes all I can muster to perform the absolutely necessary aspects of life. Iā€™ve been constantly tired and sleeping/napping a ton. I canā€™t even get myself to go for walks (unlike on ST1). What keeps me from seeing a psychiatrist asap lol is:

  1. My similar experience on ST1 before breakthrough. That last week was phenomenal. Though, ST1 was more up and down. ST2 is just down.

  2. I have had some social events where before I will play a few hours of sex mastery and/or true social. And very shortly in I feel a distinct new motivation and zest for life. Then, when I get back to ST2, itā€™s right back to blah.

I will say though, in hindsight I can see there was a TON of subtle re-examination of all things money and wealth in my life. A lot of realizations and shifts mentally. Now I just need ST3 to kick me into major action. I cannot wait!

But at the same time, yesterday it felt like a giving in. I kind of just accepted it that for ~7 to 9 more days Iā€™m just ok with not accomplishing anything material as I believe all the accomplishments have been mental changes. And this will come to be seen as invaluable over time.

(My plan is to push it to 33 days as I canā€™t really estimate my hours put in. I missed one full 24 hour period. And though Iā€™ve had numerous 20+ hour days, Iā€™ve also had a few only 5-8 hour days with the sub)

Edit: I also want to add, majority of this has been ultrasonic. And I dropped the true social and libertine meditations after maybe 7-10 run throughs after purchasing. I loved them, but with ST2ā€™s reconciliation I just canā€™t be bothered :frowning_man:

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Khan ST2 is similar. Although I did use willpower to force myself to take action, but it was sooooooo hard. Often, I would just lay in bed, like blah.

This will be so much worth it in ST3. Just wait :slight_smile:

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@anon3072973 I have considered, but Iā€™m going to just power through as Iā€™m so close to being through the worst of it.

I havenā€™t decided if I will tackle Khan in a few months as I cannot have another 2 months of total unproductive on ST1/ST2 like this again. At least so soon. I have thought about utilizing days off as an option because Khan sounds so amazing.

But for now itā€™s full on EoG.

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@AMASH Yes, itā€™s like introverted action. Can force myself to do it but then need serious recovery. Yesterday I worked straight for 6 hours because there were things that just had to get done. But now today, i feel a need to recover by just secluding myself inside thinking ok, when is the next absolute necessary work needed.

And I will add clarity, itā€™s not that I havenā€™t had really bad times in life before way worse than this. But with those there was always a reason or event I could point to. This month, there is no reason to feel this way other than the sub. Life is quite good actually. Thatā€™s what makes it difficult.

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I agree.

What I kept on thinking at the time: All this to make ST4 easier, or even possible.

Imagine if you would have jumped straight into ST4! This is laying the foundation.

I encourage you man. Youā€™re doing good work.

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