Ecstasy of Gold Journal: Kether to Malkuth

Journals - Major Programs
#90

Kind of wild to be ‘layering in’ or stacking a program as major as Emperor. A complete subliminal in its own right. But that’s what I’m doing.

An average listening day includes 6 hours. And the idea is to do this over the next 9 months to a year.

Just realized that something that’s been happening lately could be part of my reaction to the Emperor subliminal. I started finding certain information being drawn to me. Teachers or speakers about being comfortable interacting in your body as a man. Was subtle enough that I didn’t really notice. I just found myself faced with this kind of material, mostly in Youtube videos. And just letting it play. I also found msyelf drawn to watch the kinds of videos that involve ‘real conversations’ between people who had broken up or another one which will have three exes answering questions about their ex-partner.

It’s like my mind is being drawn to understand relationships and social dynamics more. After a while, it got to the point where it was so noticeable that I, well, noticed it. So, I’m typing the observation here. It occurred to me that this might have been influenced by the Emperor listening.

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Early Emperor v4 Impressions Thread
#91

Sometimes, you’re in a transitional place; evolving between more stable configurations.

And there’s a way to do that impeccably as well. Messy AND impeccable.

#92

Find your own strengths and capitalize on them.

Obsessing over the strengths of others is a waste of time; a distraction.

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#93

That’s an encouraging word. Simple, but oh, so true.

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#94

I noticed, today, that Ecstasy of Gold impacted my thinking.

Not to be too terse about it, but it was just noticing a subtle shift in my thinking. Subtle, but clearly noticeable. I expected that stage 3 might be the first one where I really started to notice something; and this suggests that things are moving in that direction. That’s just over 30 days. So, I’ll see where I am at 90 days.

To be less vague, it was as if I noticed an increase in my focus and intention with regard to wealth building.

#95

Good reminder:

Decide what you want and build it

#96

Use your ingenuity to convert every obstacle into a means.

Discipline your imagination to find the opportunity WITHIN the intractable difficulty.

This is Alchemy.

And it’s a practice.

The obstacle’s there anyway, right? So why not try it?

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#97

(almost without exception my journal entries are directed toward myself. They are written from one part of myself to another part of myself.)

At this moment, I am more aware of obstacle than I am of opportunity. I see the irony. The so-called ‘obstacle’ that I perceive today is precisely the ‘opportunity’ of yesterday. My job.

I feel that I need more time if I am to build what I wish to build. But I have allowed my job to take up too much of my time and energy.

I am aware that taking a step deeper (when I am able to manage it) reveals that my circumstances are neither obstacles nor opportunities. Rather, how I perceive my circumstances is connected to my mental and energetic strength. Invisibly, behind the scenes, it’s that energy that confers the sense that I can or cannot make something happen.

Part of this phase is about ‘making time’. One way to do this is to ‘use the present’.

We’ll see.

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#98

Interesting.

Definite frustration spike right now as listening to Emperor. Under tight deadline so would have been frustrated anyway possibly. But it feels distinctive.

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#99

PERSONAL GOLD STANDARDS

  • Meta-awareness

  • The capacity to accommodate more of phenomena

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#100

Ecstasy of Gold stage 3 played during this morning’s meditation :woman_in_lotus_position:

The direction of my thought activity indicated some degree of reconciliation. My attention inclined to past failures and missings of the mark.

Strangely for the first time, though I’ve been listening for over a month, I’m hearing a kind of chiming 5-note musical sequence behind/within the masked soundtrack. It’s F A-flat B-flat C B-flat.

It sounded far away, so at first I thought it was from somewhere in the room. Then I realized it was from within the track itself. Interesting.

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#101

Something is definitely happening.

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#102

Can you please elaborate?

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#103

That was meant to be spontaneous, not cryptic.

I’m noticing my mind and thoughts moving and responding in ways that seem directly connected to the subliminals. That’s interesting to me. In EoG stages 1 and 2, the focuses of the subliminals were similar to projects I’d been working on for a long time. But stage 3 and Emperor, those are new. And quite a bit distant from where I’ve managed to reach in my life so far.

I’ve found myself having ideas and also getting pulled back to neglected ideas with increased determination.

I’ll wait to see how it all pans out before I label it too specifically. But I feel ‘something’.

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#104

Well the product description shows that ST3 is focused on manifestation. Maybe together with Emperor, you’re trying to manifest something totally different?

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#105

That’s the truth.

Major manifestation.

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#106

Same here. It’s all from QL & NB in Emperor.

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#107

the contingent, illusive nature of sensate experience

#108

This is awesome.

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#109

My goal, my aspiration, is to be engaged with my vocation, with my life’s work. I believe that I am within striking distance of my life’s work; but a push is required, otherwise, I will remain separated from it, as I have for decades now. I find myself having a greater sense of clarity about it.

I am an INFP. In the categorization of Dr. Katherine Benziger, I am a Double Right, Basal Right lead. This means that my problem-solving and processing ability naturally inclines towards Feeling processes; the logic of feeling, the wisdom of feeling, the intuition of feeling.

Feeling is not referring to mere emotion or emotionality; rather, feeling is the organism’s processing of coherence and (structural-experiential) integrity, of which emotionality is but one dimension. Its watchwords are empathy and presence. Its philosophical branch is Phenomenology.

As a basal Right, my preferred mental processing involves direct contact and engagement with Feeling. Ironically, my current work takes this as one of its objects; not for the sake of direct engagement, but for intellectual systematization and categorization. This is the Thinking function. Analytical discernment from a distance. The competence of the categorizer, the Administrator. The laser-focused, precise systematizer who both analyzes and enforces the rules and strategies of optimal function—from a distance.

I will always be mediocre in that role of adminstrator, gate-keeper, enforcer. I can work and improve at it, but the basic, intrinsic motivation is not and will not be there.

Where I shine is in processing and inductive reasoning around Empathic Intelligence and the objects of empathic intelligence. The elements of felt experience. Guided by a felt sense of organismic integrity, coherence, and rightness. In the current state of affairs, it is disparaged and often marginalized as ‘merely’ subjective. But there is a legitimacy in the subjective when it is dealt with honestly and humbly. There are data within it that are inaccessible in any other way. And, for that matter, Consciousness itself will never be apprehended except through the lens of the subjective.

So, blah blah blah.

But anyway, this is it.

The Intellection of the Subjective. The Phenomenology of Feeling/Felt Experience.

Keep it going.

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Early Emperor v4 Impressions Thread