Take a sunbath, it helps with recon 
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It’s cloudy but I’m imagining the sun shines through for me! 
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Have a great weekend! We all, including me, must remember, this is not a sprint, it is a marathon.
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Thanks. That’s a helpful reminder for sure…
I haven’t listened to any subs today but debating it.
I don’t feel much recon at the moment.
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Day 3 ~ LBFH & DR1
Flip flopped back and fourth around taking the weekend off from subs but felt the desire around 4pm.
Listened to each 1 full 15 minute loop.
Now I’m sitting on a rock at the water taking in the scenery while relaxing.
I got this sudden feeling of intense love moving through my body and feel extremely horny now!
Reflecting back on last nights experience with the guy I’ve been seeing.
I have this thing where I want us to go to bed and stay in bed for the night. Not us have sex and he goes outside for 2 hours with me wondering when he will be coming to bed. It messes up my sleep.
All week I’ve spoken about this but it hasn’t changed yet. Maybe I am expecting too much but maybe I’m not.
I don’t mind him doing his own thing but once he comes to bed (at a reasonable hour) why not just stay put?
It came down to this feeling that he isn’t a man of his word. Why say your gonna do something then not do it? He felt attacked and that I was focusing on his flaws. He wanted validation on the “good” things and efforts he’s been making so far.
I was scanning for similarities to previous relationships where I experienced trauma related to abandonment wounds from childhood.
Maybe I am unconsciously testing him?
It seems like I’m trying to be right or the know it all and want him to think and act the way I do.
I was cutting him off and speaking over him… mind you it was after 1am and I have a toddler to wake up to in the morning. I was revved up feeling cortisol at that point.
When he’s gone I feel this sadness but then when we’re together I find myself poking at him, testing him or something.
We’ve had amazing experiences thus far but this seems to be something that is creating resistance and tension for me…
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Yes. I think so. Perfectly natural given our primal drives.
If he’s a man at the core, he won’t adjust his sleep habits just to keep you happy.
If he caves on that, you’ll end up not respecting the guy. Resentment will ensue.
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Day 4 ~ Rest Day
Woke up periodically throughout the night with vivid dreams but once I got my butt out of bed I felt energized and excited for the day…
I did some mobility and yoga before getting myself a yummy local coffee and vegan raw protein bar.
I was quite friendly and loving towards the people in the coffee shop. (Which resides in a gym)
I noticed I was looking at the group class schedule with this desire to have my name on the board teaching a class. I had a desire to become an instructor of some sort in college. I was offered a job twice at a local gym but turned it down out of fear. In order to become a certified instructor you have to film yourself. I lacked confidence in this area.
Maybe this is something I will embark on as I heal up my BS!
The guy I am seeing showed up late last night apologizing about going through mental emotional things. He listened to the full loops of both DR1 and LBFH once, a week ago. I’m wondering if that could be causing him recon. He hasn’t experienced this before. He asked if I snuck subliminals in the past couple days. I did not! (He has never listened to subs before.)
I feel this frustration about it.
I find myself looking for problems. Ways to poke at him.
Sabotaging something beautiful maybe. Or maybe recognizing something not for me.
I feel frustrated about it yet I feel lovely too at the same time! 
No anger or sadness so far today…
Feeing inspiration to dive into my goals more.
I wrote a couple more paragraphs for my first book yesterday.
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Probably DR.
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Day 5 ~ 1 full loop each of DR1 & LBFH
Yesterday I hardly had any recon.
I went on a beautiful date at the lake and watched the sun set. I had a moment where I looked at the moon feeling this childlike wonder and innocence followed by laughter. I laughed for over an hour over anything and everything.
I felt so much love and joy.
I rubbed my guys shoulders and neck on the drive and we held hands.
When we got to my house he went outside and didn’t return before I fell asleep.
I fell asleep feeling into not being affected by him possibly interrupting my sleep cycle when he finally would join me in bed.
I wanted to try something different.
I woke up around 3:30 to find him sleeping outside on my chair. He just woke up and came inside, but then he didn’t stay inside. He went out again.
He was working on his trades.
Once he crawled in bed the sun was rising and I had heavy recon.
I wanted to speak up and say some stuff but felt this desire to be silent and calmness poured over me. I rejected his touch and went back to sleep.
He left but we spoke shortly after and resolved the conflict.
We both listened to the same subs today and are now on a date.
Curious how the day will unfold!
noticing how much more I care about my sleep and other self care.
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Day 6 ~ Rest Day
I found myself laughing a lot yesterday but even over things that aren’t appropriate to laugh at…
The guy I am seeing shared some very deep traumatic experiences from his past… very uncomfortable stuff that he’s never shared with anyone before… and here I was laughing as he shared. 
but he was okay with it and it actually lightened the blows… he listened to the same stack as me yesterday too.
I went to bed feeling calmer… had lots of weird dreams with minimal recall. I notice where I have some cleaning up to do in consciousness…
I seem to be waking up in middle of night with thoughts to process but I don’t feel anxious about it… I’m not exhausted during the day…
I feel less desperate or needy… I am enjoying ME time… appreciating more of ME. Loving myself from the inside out… noticing when unloving thoughts come up to prune from my mind!
I had a beautiful yoga session this morning while listening to Tool… sang my heart out!
Felt very releasing…
I am happy I chose to do another cycle of DR1.
I continue focusing on better posture… releasing blocks and tension… noticing where resistance comes up and how to eliminate it quicker…
I don’t feel as sexually aroused from LBFH as I did the first few listens. Maybe because it’s the week before my period… not sure…
Rest and relaxation are more of a priority for me right now and less intensity with my physical body…
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Day 7 ~ listening day
Letting go of control seems to be something I’m reconing about.
Yesterday I noticed that I’m having some moments where I want to control and tell someone what will help them and then sadness or anger comes up. The coach/teacher in me. I know I shouldn’t offer help unless someone asks for it and that I am to invite them but it’s difficult for me!
I was trying to explain Neville Goddard Law of Assumption.
I was feeling like I wanted to say mean things to the guy I’m seeing because he didn’t like how I was acting. This know it all my way is better feeling apparently. I don’t want to say mean things but it was coming up for whatever reason. It disappeared quickly.
(He was also having recon from the same stack.)
I was angry but also wanted to be loving.
So weird 
I’m also feeling contradictory about what a healthy romantic relationship entails, seeing as I never fully had one before. Codependent vs interdependent.
Healthy attachment vs unhealthy.
What is the purpose of a romantic relationship? What does a healthy relationship look like?
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Day 8 ~ Rest
Breaking the habit of being me… the me I don’t really want to be… who no longer serves a purpose in my life anymore…
The me who felt the need to defend and protect everything… that mostly everything was a threat to me… so unconsciously different things would start happening for me…I would make manifest all kinds of things to reinforce my BS!
It’s crazy how much more awareness I am having… as I feel these various sensations I am experiencing as things are healing within me… very deeply…
I feel like I am going through reformatting in my mind and body…
I can’t even stay stuck for long… there’s no more excuses for that!
When things come up into your awareness you have the choice to face them confidently and transmute that crap to gold… or you can fight yourself, run from yourself or freeze…
With this stack I have no other choice but to face myself… all the layers of me being!
I feel so uncomfortable with the uncomfortable which used to be my norm!
This was my loopy assumption for the past couple weeks:
I got to bed late once again because my new guy would come to bed late and interfere with my sleep… that I would be woken up early by my daughter… that I wouldn’t get anything done… that I would have to rush yoga and mobility… blah blah!
I have been experimenting with changing this assumption and things have been slowly improving…
No one to change but self! I can change the way I view people and what I naturally expect, which isn’t always loving for me or them… not that I change them thinking it will change something in me… that is ass backwards!
I was reading Neville Goddard yesterday and this stood out for me:
“You will know when you have succeeded in releasing Barabbas, your old concept of self, and when you have successfully crucified Jesus, or fixed the new concept of self, by simply looking MENTALLY at the people you know. If you see them as you formerly saw them, you have not changed your concept of self, for all changes of concepts of self result in a changed relationship to the world.
We always seem to others an embodiment of the ideal we inspire. Therefore, in meditation, we must imagine that others see us as they would see us were we what we desire to be.
You can release Barabbas and crucify and resurrect Jesus if you will first define your ideal.”
~Neville Goddard
Assumptions Harden into Fact
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As a man, I can give my two cents here. In my experience, someone who is restless in body is also restless in mind. You seem very intuitive and able to scan or read people well (this is my assumption from seeing some of your posts) and I’m assuming you may be picking up on this conflict occurring within him.
I understand the concept of testing a man to make sure he is dominant and won’t change himself for you - however, I believe this is something different, as you are feeling tension as a result of his behavior, which I don’t think you would be feeling if it was all subconscious primal behavior.
I have also experienced trauma from abaondonment issues; in my own life, I’ve often pushed others away before they can get close to me, in order to prevent the awkward feelings of feeling alone, yet being with someone. I think that the fact that you’re aware of this possibility reveals that this is probably not your motivation in this case.
If you have ever been told that you are an empath previously, I would say you definitely are picking up on his mental state, and that is what is causing tension in you, not necessarily his outward behavior.
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I agree with everything you have said.
Thank you
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Day 9 ~ haven’t decided if I’ll have a listen today…
Had some intense conversations with the new guy last night… dating while doing DR is quite intense at times! Some misunderstandings are happening. I feel like I am sensing his inner conflicts due to being such a heightened empath. If that’s even a term!
I have noticed that sometimes I see him in multiple ways for some reason. Sometimes I wonder if I am seeing other past lives or if we operate in multiple universes or quantum realms.
When I’m in recon I notice all the things that bother me in him and others which reflect back to me…
I get stubborn and feel almost stuck in place.
Just as soon as the stuckness sets in I find a solution to the disagreement though.
I dreamed vividly of my physical insecurities. Hearing him talk about all of them. The things I don’t share out loud with him. It had me tossing and turning with frustration. I feel like my brain was zapped! I wish I could go back to sleep for awhile but I have a toddler to entertain all morning.
I definitely feel weird this morning.
Probably get my butt out in nature with the toddler, feeling into what I want and living from there in consciousness… maybe I will have a conversation with my subconscious mind. Auto suggestion or something.
I’m not one who stays stuck with my recon. I use it to my advantage and also love it because it shows me this stuff is working.
** I get frustrated with him when really it’s me frustrated with myself. When I let myself down for the things that I highly value around self care. The way I end my days are very important to me. Boundaries around this are important. I was bending and allowing things that are simply non negotiable. This created recon!
If he wants to stay up late at my house when I want to go to bed then he can leave. Simple as that! I don’t need to dance around the idea any longer.
** I’ve been thinking about my ex fiancé more again with this sadness related to it. What if I really moved on and fully committed to this new guy? What if my ex decided he wanted to reconcile? Why do I hold on to this thought. He hasn’t dated anyone else yet.
We broke up 20 months ago. We share a toddler together. I left him and broke his heart. Broke up our family. I went on to heal myself. I’m a different person now. Maybe it’s that I miss the idea of him but we wouldn’t actually ever work.
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I remember that I dated this girl one time who was really similar to myself. We had almost the exact same birthday, we had been through a lot of the same stuff, and we had this really intimate and deep connection.
That was the good stuff; then the triggering started happening. She would say something to me that would just make me feel sad, lonely, mad, frustrated, etc. Then I would say something to her that would make her feel similar feelings.
I tried to talk out these feelings with her, to reason with her, but seemed like everything I said, she was triggered by, which then triggered me, and it was like a snowball effect.
Long story short, we broke up, and decided we are not good for each other…but I always had this sinking feeling in my gut that I was missing something important, but couldn’t put my finger on it.
Years later, I was watching a video by JP Sears on YouTube; he and his wife were talking about their marriage, and he said something that I don’t think I’ll ever forget. He basically said that their relationship was one of triggers. He said that he constantly triggered her and vice versa…and he went on to say that this is why they stayed together, because they brought up areas within each other that needed to be healed; and they helped each other heal in those areas.
I used to think that being triggered and triggering someone else was a really bad thing…now I know that this is exactly the kind of relationship that helps us grow and become more mature.
If you find yourself being triggered, and any man you’re with does as well, I would say that if he’s willing (and if you’re willing) to try to heal and grow as a result of shit being brought up to the surface, you’ll be better off in the long run. It won’t be easy, but it will definitely be worth it I think.
In my own opinion, I will only date people that I trigger and whom trigger me from now on, because that is how I know we relate so deeply that real growth and healing can take place. That’s what relationships are all about.
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Help! I’m in major recon! Can you give me some helpful hints. Any info would be appreciated. Thanks.
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According to the forum.
Sweet food/sugar
1L of water
Sun exposure
Physical activity
Washout
Sleep
I have found when I feel full of Recon that writing it all out(journaling) can reduce the intensity and support the processing. This goes beyond just daily journal entries.
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@Geoff A million thanks to you! I have been following them all but one!, but there’s a Sub for that. 
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Sunshine
Nature
Yoga
Singing
Playing music
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