Maybe you just need to be free to throttle up and throttle down according to your situation at a given time.
I don’t know.
The way I do my own stack is to alternate days. It’s like ABABAB then Sunday’s a rest day. So I play program A 3 days a week and get 4 rest days. And same for program B.
Yeah makes sense. I’ve never been good at gauging my own limits and when to cut back. Today I’m just listening to SanguineU, don’t think I can take anymore DR today. I’ll just take it as it comes from now on vs a strict schedule.
Listen to Abba and take Sundays off?
One thing about me is that I’m constitutionally incapable of listening to ABBA. I don’t know when it started but I imagine it was an immediate reaction. I do not like the chords in their music. A LOT. It’s pre-rational.
I’m aware of how beloved they are. So if anyone reads this, no need to enlighten me.
The way some people occasionally can’t handle your love of metal, @James? Well, ABBA is that for me.
Every woman in my family seems to like it. And it is pretty much the number one easiest way to get me to leave a room. ABBA is my exorcism music. I think it just sounds aggressively major and intrusively happy.
Maybe when I finally get around to working with Dragon Reborn, it will address this issue.
Some people? Most consider it noise when it’s actually a very intricate form of music.
Dancing Queen is quite catchy.
This could help.
It’s those swedes man. They own pop. They can write really happy sounding stuff that lacks depth.
I love some of the pop music of this Swede.
It’s also very positive, sonically I mean. But, somehow I can take it in.
When it comes to Scandinavia I guess I’m basically a Bjork-lover.
Although, I like this Norwegian group’s song. It’s fairly happy too .
I’m willing to work with a happy band. I just need a little bit of movement.
Okay, enough disruption of your journal @Fractal_Explorer. (quietly backs away)
So I bought an audio book on manifesting. Same song and dance, not sure what I was expecting. However I did feel like punching the guy in the face when he was blagging on and on about being thankful and gratitude as the key to manifesting. I get it, but at the same time I really don’t. Maybe it’s just a sore spot because it seems the equivalent of “just be happy”. Or the generally useless and patronizing advice that comes from people that don’t understand what it’s like to deal with mental illness.
Bleh. I’m not feeling pessimistic like I usually am, but I am deathly allergic to overly optimistic slants on things. I reject it on the spot. I’m not saying that’s right, but it’s a consequence of continual disappointment in my life. It feels like a conman that will lead you into a back alley where his boys mug you. Nice appearance and promising opportunity, but the reality is it was just a show.
Music to punch someone in the face by
So is Ebola.
I feel you on this. It’s a tough journey. Even some people in this forum also have the “just be positive” attitude without understanding what people are really facing.
Thanks. I think I do have a lot of residual emotional wounds from stuff like that. I get so upset because it triggers feelings of failure and judgement from others.
Everyone is on their own journey and you are responsible for your own. We have our own burdens to carry and our own lessons to learn. It would be nice if other people would utterly understand your experiences and tell you exactly what you need to know, but this is unlikely. Just as you also are not very likely to tell them all that they need to know. Anyone who honestly faces her/his own mind is going to find much more ignorance than insight.
Still we make our imperfect efforts to help ourselves and, sometimes, each other. However those efforts turn out, they probably beat the alternative.
Went to the doctor yesterday, getting off my meds. Time to see if these things were really helping. He was hesitant and adamant that all my symptoms would return in 3 weeks. I don’t think so. I’ve been taking this stuff for a bit now and I can feel when it hits me, I know the crash, I know the shit sleep, and I know how it killed my appetite. Even if it was helping I’m not living a life with side effects and saying “oh well good enough” no fuck that.
I had the best intentions going in, I tried it, but it’s not working out. And it’s not like it was life changing. In fact it feels like someone drove a wedge between my ability to articulate ideas and what comes out of my mouth. I confirmed online with other reviews that it does that. Also can fuck with memory. I’ve had all that and I’m done.
Have you read about Deep Sleep in the Q store?
I have. I don’t know why it never made it into one of my customs. But I think the sleep issues are these meds mostly. Will find out in another 3 weeks.
In other news, I’ve been staying consistent with SanguineU and it’s been helping a ton. Best way to describe it is while I’m going through this intense healing there’s a lot of doubts and fears that come up. SanguineU has been helping me move forward despite these. But not in a labored or stressful way, it’s this feeling that chaos can erupt at any moment but everything will correct itself. There’s no need to worry as everything will work itself out.
Combined with DR I can safely say this combo will ground you. You might still be insecure, afraid, or have doubts but you keep on going forward any way you can.
Awesome!
Off your meds for?