Thanks man. I was thinking similar a few days ago. Just me being willing to get help is a huge step getting over the internalized shame of not being able to figure everything out in my life on my own.
Decided I’m going to take an extended break from DR and all subliminals. Assess where I’m at and go from there.
I had a deep conversation with one of my friends last night. He’s one of the few friends I can speak openly to and he can share his stuff too. I’ve realized I’ve been in a cycle I’ve been having trouble breaking for most of my life. It’s frustrating, complicated, and isolating.
Depending on how I feel after this break I’ll decide if I want to go back to DR or not. This just might not be the way for me. And I’m not gonna let some insecurity over being able to handle DR guide me into making a foolish decision. But like I said, I’ll reassess after the break. Sometimes I just really have to take a deep look at where I’m at, not where I want to be and build a plan from there.
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Some stuff on my mind. Last week was really hard for me and there was some stuff I was dealing with that was really messing with my head and still is.
I’m happy for other people on this forum that get results that are life changing. I think it’s amazing. But I feel like I’m doing something wrong. I hate my insights and realizations that go nowhere in my life. It’s always been some stupid ego based gratification without actually changing my life.
I don’t want to be a warrior or beat my inner demons or fight for happiness or whatever phrase people say about achieving things. I’m just tired of it all. I’m still taking my break from DR but I feel like after this week I’m probably done with it. I wasn’t ready for it and I sure as hell can’t make it through it without throwing my life into a tailspin.
I honestly can’t articulate how disillusioned I am with life in general right now. It all seems so pointless. I just thought of giving up on subliminals in general as well. After looking at a competitors stuff and remembering how that didn’t work too well for me either. And it’s not the tools, it’s how you use them. So overall it doesn’t matter, everything I use seems doomed to fail because I’ve just failed to change anything in my life for close to 10 years now. I’m the fucking problem, but I don’t I don’t know how to fix it.
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That’s not true.
I’ve literally watched you changing.
It’s just that you only compare yourself to the ideals in your own head most of the time. And your own head is always going to move the goalposts to make it seem like you’re not making progress.
The horizon is always exactly FAR away.
I hope you’re familiar enough with me by now (if only through Internet) to know that when I say ‘that’s not true’, I do it for emphasis. I would not actually presume to invalidate your intimate perspective on yourself. There will always be a sort of legitimacy to that, because it’s how you feel. And that is simply valid.
But I want to be sure that you are also open to equally plausible alternative perspectives.
I don’t need to tell you that working with this human mind gets damned hard and it really kicks our asses.
This mind of yours is beautiful. But it’s limited. It does not give the full account. Make sure you’re getting other data to balance out the narratives that it generates.
Shit.
Maybe not helpful.
Really, just reaching out to support you, man.
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This is exactly why I posted. I have no perspective anymore. It’s these little jabs that pop up throughout my life that I feel like they tear me up inside because there’s so much pain and failure caught up in the past.
It’s just a lot and I appreciate you responding. I’m just really burned out and with Qv2 coming out and me running DR, I need a plan of action that’s going to work for me. Not something that feels like a blind leap of faith you know? But I don’t know how to get there. I wish I knew.
I just can’t get through the reconciliation episodes anymore. They’re too much. I know change isn’t easy, but I can’t do this. I’m losing days even weeks of my life because I can’t do anything and I justify it by saying it’ll all be worth it in the end.
I mean I fully admit at this point DR was a bad decision for me. I shouldn’t have ran this program in hopes of building a solid foundation. I should have built a solid foundation and then saw this as going beyond that. I don’t really know why I have such a brutal reaction to it, but I don’t think I’m ready. I think at this point i need something to support me more rather than tear me down and build me up.
Your post was helpful. I didn’t want someone coming in here agreeing with my negative delusions. I’m always looking to challenge this kind of stuff. But goddamn if it isn’t hard to gain any kind of object measure on where I’m at through my own eyes.
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You seem like me maybe 10-12 years ago. That’s when I chose to study marketing and business related topics. Took me many years, but finally maybe 4-5 years ago something started to click. And then once I run EoG everything changed.
Now, I have a purpose.
Hang in there, you’ll figure it out.
Go single stage with Emperor. Stick to it and try different things. Even if you haven’t finished DR all stages, it still has cleared some stuff keeping you down.
Find your direction/ purpose.
I know, easier said than done.
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Thanks man. Honestly I was thinking about going Ascension standalone title for a bit. Maybe starkQ, either one of those. I have to narrow it down/think it over.
My purpose in life has and always will be music, I’m convinced that’s what fulfills me. Unfortunately my life isn’t anywhere close to alignment with that path and I’ve been trying to get on it and leave behind all this shit I feel I was dragged into against my will. Trying to figure out how I can make music a bigger part of my life has been difficult.
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I can completely empathize with you. Its really hard fighting the same problem for years and years its really disheartening. Every dart goes wide and theres a lot of pain and suffering.
The only thing that keeps me going is knowing it may take 10 years of beating at that door to have the one year that will change your life. You are not alone in this feeling.
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Going to rebuild a custom I created before with minor tweaks. It’s a 10 module one with the core being AM. I was thinking about running AM standalone but then I realized this custom would be better for two reasons. 1, name embedding. 2, being able to choose support modules that I feel target my weakness or vulnerabilities that others exploit and that drag me down. 3, being able to push it in the music production direction as I feel music is the strong focus of my life.
So I’m going to close the book on DR for now. Maybe in the future, but now just doesn’t feel right for me.
I’ve been feeling like this for about 3 months. I’ve just interpreted it as DR doing it’s cleaning.
Post your custom ideas. Let’s help you develop something fun and uplifting pieced together so you can enjoy life more.
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Will do. I’m in the process of brainstorming something now.
I guess I wouldn’t mind the loss of perspective thing if I could just shrug it off and let the healing do its thing. But I just can’t for whatever reason and I really get in my own way with it and I’m the worst at showing myself compassion for anything. So it’s a bad spiral especially when my life is kind of a mess.
This is what I currently had in mind
Ascended Mogul Q Core
Ultimate Music Producer
Inner Voice
Gratitude Embodiment
Joie de Virve
Negative Energy Transmutation
Omnidimensional
Current Invoker
Unlimiter
The Merger of Worlds
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Understandable.
How about Negativity Displacer and Stress Displacement and Sanguine?
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Those are good suggestions. Especially negativity displacer, I can see that one helping a lot. And Sanguine is always good. I’m going to purchase those now. I was trying to keep the custom at 10 modules so I don’t overload my mind, but I’m wondering if I could just throw these three on to bring it to 13 modules. They’re more like support, so it doesn’t seem like there would be much to process or internalize to get benefit from them.
I understand.
My thought too.
There is a chunk of what you are putting in that is like a gentle healing by building up and soothing rather than DR which I personally think is more like leveling the landscape followed by rebuilding.
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I’ll give it a shot. I think I’ll be ok. It seems like it’s the content of the subs that puts me into overload territory rather than the quantity. And a lot of these modules aren’t “aggressive” if you know what I mean. They seem like they’ll balance AM nicely
My thought too.
Really appreciate you taking the time to help. Just getting a rough idea of this custom is helping me feel better about moving forward with everything. Took me about 3 customs to get to this point lol. But it never occurred to me to put it together like this and I think it’ll really help me out based on my temperament and how I react to subliminals.
definitely, something to think about.
Sure keep posting your ideas about customs.
I sympathize if you are feeling burnt out from DR. There have been times I’ve taken breaks of 7+ days from it.