Washout
First day of my washout 
. My brain 
was nagging at me for 9 days of washout, now it seems far less decided. My last washout was 5 days and I had a feeling I still needed to do some processing 
. I’ll just go for the 9 days, it’s not like I’ll lose my results.
Fear
It seems obvious to me now that I actually avoid doing my responsibilities and do something else (like say, writing this post) because of my fears 
. I fear being shown a fool for not being able to sell to my clients, I fear being seen as incompetent, I fear being scolded at by my superiors, etc. It makes me procrastinate and avoid what needs to actually be done. I need to tackle this head on by just doing it. 
Ascension seems to have gradually reduced my fears and lead to a small increase in action-taking but there’s still a lot of work to do.
Next Habit: Work
I believe journaling 
has become a solid habit for me at this point. I need to make work a serious habit of mine. 4 hours of focused work 
per day. That’s my goal. No point working longer if you’re inefficient. I NEED to do a proper workflow for myself.
Thoughts
Lots of negative thoughts regarding my competence. I berate myself for not being able to be like the others who are far better at me. I doubt my ability to actually hit my target for this year. Lots of doubt and negativity. I’m saving up for my 
Golden Heart Custom and it does have 
LBFH in it. I wonder how that’d change me.
. Not entirely sure what’s the best way to go about it. Complete abstinence? I think that’s Monk Mode. Also, I’m a little bit on the annoyed side today, so my recon is still subsiding. Don’t stress out, Beowulf 
.
. Lots of thinking 
. So the self-introspection done today is worth something.
. Not much was done and procrastination was pretty bad. However, I did make a commitment to not use social media and I did manage to curb using it for half a day. I must acknowledge my tiny wins whenever they come. Also, to relieve my anxiety and fear I’ve started writing a guide so that I can have more clarity in what I’m supposed to do in my work. Building pipelines 
and workflows 
that will ease my confusion.
. I’m also glad to read other’s viewpoints coming directly from the horse’s mouth 
, so I don’t get a misrepresentation of what they believe.
. Unfortunately, I’m not sure if I’m incredibly unlucky but none of them picked up since they were all busy 
. I’m happy I actually bothered to do it. I’m starting to realize I have some kind of subconscious “block” in terms of just doing things I need to do. It’s a mixture of fear + anxiety. So now I finally understand what people mean when they say procrastination isn’t laziness - it’s a sign of something else inside, deep-rooted within you.
. It’s not as difficult as I thought it was and it’s actually enjoyable for me since I consider journaling to be an enjoyable activity. There are just 9 more major habits to go 
.
. I consume hours upon hours of social media (Youtube, Twitter, Reddit, etc) every single day for 
years now. I’ve sort of justified to myself that I’m learning things that benefit me but if I’m being frankly honest I don’t remember about 99% of the things I’ve consumed. I very rarely laugh at any funny videos I watch too, it’s just for the sake of keeping up to date on meaningless things. It’s a ridiculous 
time-sink. If I had taken the time that I wasted on social media and used that on a useful skill instead, I’d honestly be an expert by now. I find social interaction of any kind to be so much more emotionally fulfilling than mindlessly browsing 
social media.
. It’s interesting, it must be because there’s a backlog of subliminal input that needed to be processed 
. For moderate-time periods, I will need to use apps like Hack Chinese to learn 
Mandarin Blueprint. This way, I hit two birds 
with one stone and I’m able to hit two habits at once.
go? Not terrible, thankfully. I’ve noticed something. I will ALWAYS open my phone 
.
chain of habits.
Jogging → 
Stretching → 
Meditation → 
Weightlifting → 
Diet → 
Piano
focused results. And this isn’t an exaggeration but I have tried implementing multiple major habits at the same and it always fails. So I’m not going to be stupid and do that again. I could add 
No PMO somewhere here too just for fun, though the P part of PMO is no longer an issue to me.
energy. I haven’t properly 
advance in every area of my life through the synergistic, self-compounding effects of every single habit I am doing every single day.
Absolutely beautiful.
True Sell custom. I’m deeply interested in going with a 
Emperor Black + 
. It’s something that I’ve just accepted out of defeatism but dealing with it will give me dividends in all areas of my life. The energy and motivation it will give me WILL 
transform me radically.
ignition and 
fuel necessary to pursue and internalize all of my other habits. Reading other people’s testimonials on the benefits they’ve gained from running is wide-ranging and inspiring - some that are pretty unexpected. I hope to gain plenty of benefits from this 
Silver Tongue custom in my 4th Cycle.
boy to a 
.
Spidey-Sense” in which I have a tingling or anxious feeling that I should do something at that moment. If I don’t (based on my past experiences), I will regret it.
anger at people who were supposed to be emotionally supportive of me. Thankfully, I’m more under control this time and I cut off my interactions with them before it escalates even further. Then I resumed communications and end on a good note 
bull. I’m calm 95% of the time, very unaffected by what happens outside of me. But if you somehow manage to make me angry, I will let loose and let my anger all out on you. That’s a major flaw I have that I need to work on.
upbringing and 
environment, since I constantly see this sort of thing around me and my lack of capability towards fixing it. It has trained me to constantly see the contradictions and find the truth in any situation so that I don’t fall into it - leading to me have a 
marginalized communities, to help others and to radically change systems are all a result of my childhood. So there is an upside to this.
On the Bright Side
ruin me. Now with this incident happening, I can safely say that this 
trajectory now. There was a silver lining here. It was a lesson that actually worked out in my favour. I had a 
backlog of work that I still haven’t done. Taking this opportunity would just push this even further behind. Now of course, I have to acknowledge that if I had taken this opportunity AND finished the backlog earlier, that this would not be the case. Another lesson to be aware of.
. I honestly think this woman is just perfect for me and it’s hard for me to just not appreciate having her everyday. This is probably like my 4th post talking about how much I love her haha. Also, it seems that I’m no longer really jealous of men flirting with her all the time. I just focus on other things and it no longer bothers me anymore, which is great! 
journal so far to know that stuff happens. It’s probably relatable too to a lot of people here who may feel the progress of people with crazy results on the forum seems out of reach for now. And it’s good to look back at this 1 year from now and see this being a rather amusing thing in hindsight 
.
R.I.C.H with it. This way I satisfy my brain and my heart. So my new stack would be
EOG ST1
money and you can’t even execute it without the 
skills necessary in the first place.
wealth limits, exceptional 
persuasive abilities and charm alongside 
endless self-love spreading to those around me? The downsides can be tackled with by taking relentless action until I can build my initial capital. Then it’s 
smooth-sailing from there.
A Father’s Advice
father those same questions. He gave me some insightful answers. He said he felt accomplished and content at his age (60s). He decided to segue this into a 
Told me his regrets and to follow your intuition, not logic. And he then said in hindsight, his 
God’s plan.
physical state today, I’d wager it’s closer to 16 weeks because of how bad my cardio is 
. Man, I love it though. That was a really good run even if it was only for 15 minutes. My abdomen and chest muscles were hurting, I was out of 
breath and everything. But I’m really happy I went for a run today. I honestly was scared of going to the 
.
. Slept a lot too today, must be my body readjusting to the input.
muse but it’s always good to make some new friends 
.
红包 (red packet). For the most part, there is not much else to report on this except that I enjoyed my time!
. Maybe my phone/laptop is distorting my actual voice to make it sound more suave than it actually is or is it because I talk differently online? Something to think about 
10K Runner app since the last time I did this 2 days ago, I was not properly following instructions as I was gassed out. Today I properly followed everything, albeit at a lower speed than I’m used to. I used to be able to run at the 9 speed setting, now I have to downgrade it to 8. It was a good run and it really showed how physically weak I am in terms of cardio. Went back home, took a really nice shower and I feel good now. Grabbed some pizza 
to reward myself and now I’m typing this journal entry.
. An old friend I haven’t talked to in a long time then told me he’s been going through some serious personal troubles over the past couple of months. I told him if he needs someone to talk to, I’ll be there for him. There’s a realization here where I should definitely keep up with my 
friends from time to time, since they may be going through any troubles.
. I suspect 
lover about this and she got upset. I’m pretty upfront and I tell her if any girls have been adding my contact number. She’s not too happy I added her number 
. I’m only interested in having a 
Bodyweight Exercises
Relaxation
minor cold the night before until this afternoon. I’m much better now so I decided to still go for the run tonight.